Surely everybody is asexual to a certain stage in their life? In general, I'd say that 6 year olds aren't thinking about sex at all, so therefore have no sexual urges or preferences - which is what asexuality is defined as.
As for myself, I started noticing my liking for other guys when I was in primary school. Just the odd sneaky peek now and again in gym etc. The attraction grew from there really.
I really find it hard to believe it when people say since they were a kid. When you're a kid you're firmly asexual. Straight people weren't straight then, gay people weren't gay, they were nothing.
I remember having "crushes" on people pre puberty although they were nothing like what I experience now, there was no sexual element to it.
Your sexuality for the most part is fixed pre birth. So you notice whether you like being around boys or girls, how that makes you feel and so on. It is not sexual. It is, however your sexuality playing out.
I didn't used to think it had anything to do with being gay, but I've noticed this evening that others shared similar traits when younger.
Honestly... :rolleyes:
It might have something to do with you being a feminine person but I don't get what it has to do with being gay. I'm not saying your wrong I just I don't get it.
I thought I was gay until I was about 17 or so. I really felt like an outsider, I just didn't find guys attractive and other people picked up on this, typical school-girl b**ches calling me a "lezzer" if I dared even make eye contact. I had felt like this from about the age of 10, but then something did seem to change. I'm now 23 and my attraction to girls has certainly not gone, but I would identify myself as bi (although not now I'm back home in a place that hasn't moved beyond the 1900's).
Known since I was about 14 but was confused/in denial and didn't fully accept it until recently aged 19. Only told family etc this year at Halloween. With hindsight, don't know why it was so hard for me to accept it as my worries over telling family seem to have been down to my fears only as they have all been lovely.
Surely everybody is asexual to a certain stage in their life? In general, I'd say that 6 year olds aren't thinking about sex at all, so therefore have no sexual urges or preferences - which is what asexuality is defined as.
I'm confused by the amount of people who don't think under tens have any attraction to anyone whatsoever - while it might not be attraction as you find in your teens, I know of plenty of examples of little kids who have 'crushes' of some sort on other kids, teachers, older siblings of their friends, celebs, cartoon characters! When I was about 5 there was a little boy at school who used to want to hold my hand all the time because he 'fancied me', as much as a 5 year old can fancy anyone. But, to get to my point, I think it's pretty well documented that to varying extents, even young, young children are able to feel 'attraction' of some sort to certain people. It may have no bearing on their eventual sexuality, but then again, it might.
From the age of 4 or 5 with the lipstick and the scarves.
From the age of eight being in love with David Van Day.
Whenever I read some of your posts...You could've been my secret twin (:o:eek::p). Though I'm (cough) pretty str8 now (something I had to work on!) I was a fully fledged tranny when I was 4-5! Rarely a day went by without me being told off/spanked for exiting the 'wendy house' in full frock (the more floral the better) and over-sized heels... What saved me from being too nelly was the fact I liked chicks with guns! So, Charlies Angels was a chance to play dress up but also to carry a pistol! Accessorize, bitch! I still have a terrible school photo circa 1976 of my 'Purdey' haircut.
And yes, David Van Day was f$*£ing lush in his day! but my first crush was David Cassidy & Parker Stevenson from Hardy Boys & Nancy Drew Mysteries and... The Man From Atlantis....!:o;)
I'm confused by the amount of people who don't think under tens have any attraction to anyone whatsoever - while it might not be attraction as you find in your teens, I know of plenty of examples of little kids who have 'crushes' of some sort on other kids, teachers, older siblings of their friends, celebs, cartoon characters! When I was about 5 there was a little boy at school who used to want to hold my hand all the time because he 'fancied me', as much as a 5 year old can fancy anyone. But, to get to my point, I think it's pretty well documented that to varying extents, even young, young children are able to feel 'attraction' of some sort to certain people. It may have no bearing on their eventual sexuality, but then again, it might.
Perhpas these "crushes" are cultural though? everywhere Children go and look, they see heterosexual relationships. Obviously, children are very easily influenced. Maybe that "attraction" is there because society tells them it should be? I don't know of many young children who admit same-sex crushes- bearing in mind that at ages you have siuggested, children would most likely be too young to understand homosexuality is a bit of a taboo subject- so if it were a natural attraction, they'd know no better.
I'm confused by the amount of people who don't think under tens have any attraction to anyone whatsoever - while it might not be attraction as you find in your teens, I know of plenty of examples of little kids who have 'crushes' of some sort on other kids, teachers, older siblings of their friends, celebs, cartoon characters! When I was about 5 there was a little boy at school who used to want to hold my hand all the time because he 'fancied me', as much as a 5 year old can fancy anyone. But, to get to my point, I think it's pretty well documented that to varying extents, even young, young children are able to feel 'attraction' of some sort to certain people. It may have no bearing on their eventual sexuality, but then again, it might.
I definitely had some experiences with x3 boys when i was 6/7/8 years of age. Obviously nothing full-on, just moments of experimenting that involved lying ontop of each other, kissing & touch. What was interesting, was that by 6 I was already branded the school 'poofter' (see earlier post - I did myself no favours!), yet, one of those early experiences was with my years school heart-throb, who was totally physical & the 'sports-jock' of our year. I wonder sometimes how he turned out!
Perhpas these "crushes" are cultural though? everywhere Children go and look, they see heterosexual relationships. Obviously, children are very easily influenced. Maybe that "attraction" is there because society tells them it should be? I don't know of many young children who admit same-sex crushes- bearing in mind that at ages you have siuggested, children would most likely be too young to understand homosexuality is a bit of a taboo subject- so if it were a natural attraction, they'd know no better.
I think its a mixture of the influences/experiences you recieve in your first 6-7 years, backed up by your own genetics leaning a certain way. I dont believe its just genetics or just influences, I think the two go hand-in-hand.
Starting about 6-7, experiences with other boys. Then a set of 2-3 regular sexual interests around 12-16. Then I fought it for about 6-8 months, but a former sex buddy wanted to have sex, I said "I don't do that any more", then I thought for a few moments and said "ok, allright". I knew who I was and what I wanted.
Me and Simon spoke about it when we were about 15 and said if we were gay (we knew we were) we'd have to put up with other people's hostile attitude and probably move to somewhere move accepting. We both moved away, separately. I met up with him years later in London. We were both incredibly glad we'd decided to be who we were, and that we'd moved away from a tiny coastal town where we would have had to hide who we were. Honestly, what sort of existance is that?
As for fumblings with other boys, this goes on all the time in school. I had fumblings with many boys who are now happily married, they weren't gay, they used wanted some sort of sexual experience, any sort of sexual experience.
Starting about 6-7, experiences with other boys. Then a set of 2-3 regular sexual interests around 12-16. Then I fought it for about 6-8 months, but a former sex buddy wanted to have sex, I said "I don't do that any more", then I thought for a few moments and said "ok, allright". I knew who I was and what I wanted.
Me and Simon spoke about it when we were about 15 and said if we were gay (we knew we were) we'd have to put up with other people's hostile attitude and probably move to somewhere move accepting. We both moved away, separately. I met up with him years later in London. We were both incredibly glad we'd decided to be who we were, and that we'd moved away from a tiny coastal town where we would have had to hide who we were. Honestly, what sort of existance is that?
As for fumblings with other boys, this goes on all the time in school. I had fumblings with many boys who are now happily married, they weren't gay, they used wanted some sort of sexual experience, any sort of sexual experience.
'Tiny coastal towns' have a lot to answer for! And yep, 'any sort of sexual experience' strikes the right note.;)
The first person I ever remember thinking sexual thoughts about was a woman (Lightning from Gladiators :eek:) when I was quite young, and I really, really liked Betty Rubble! But I never really fancied anyone in my teens at all. I assumed I was straight though, I guess because you just do. And then started really fancying women when I was about 18, then kinda started fancying men too not long after, and spent several years wondering if I was gay or straight or bi or what. I managed to narrow it down to either bisexy or lesbean after a while.
I finally figured I'm a more gay than straight bisexy, which is pretty annoying really.
Sorry to dig this up, but I got reading it and it's all rather interesting.
For me personally I think to some extent I have always known. I get the point about it not being sexual for children and it certainly wasn't for me until I hit puberty but I always knew I was fond of boys in a 'special' way from the age of about 4 or 5. I never had any remotely similar feelings about girls.
In fact, I went through a bit of a period of being anxious (in general) when I was 9, and actually sort of came out to my parents then; saying that I was worried I might be gay! :eek: (obviously being scared about being different).
After that I kind of forgot about it again and it wasn't until I was 13 and a gay friend asked me whether I was gay that I had to think about it and confront and admit it. I haven't looked back since then.
I loved looking at boobs up until i was 11 then i watched this recorded program on a video Sex and Shopping that featured gay sex and i suddenly got wood, so i realised i like a bit of everything...:)
I was about 11 - I never knew I was gay but I just preferred the company of girls at school compared to the boys. I was never into football, I'd rather play skipping lol. I had girlfriends in middle school and kissed girls but it was just to be like other boys. Such a shame really.
I was about 16 when I knew that the person I was was a homosexual
When I was a child I knew I was different from the other girls in my class, while they all had a crush on the only male teacher in our primary school I had several crushes on my female teachers:o. But for me I only really realised what it was when all my pals said kissing boys was wonderful. I didn't get that at all. At best it was sloppy but mainly down right yuk. When I kissed my first girlfriend then I knew!
I'm not sure. I remember having odd thoughts about a boy in my class when I was in year 5 of junior school. I don't think there becomes a moment of 'awareness' but it's gradual. For me anyway. I slowly realised but it was a few years until I was 18 then I kept on repressing it and trying to ignore it, hoping it would go away.
There is a moment where it's accepted within yourself, I remember that moment quite clearly. It was like I'd just seen a blue fox of something pass in front of me in the street. 'Shit! I'm actually gay'. It still took a few couple of years to say anything to anyone though.
What got me was the number of people who phoned to offer support or to give numbers for advice/helplines. Beyond that moment I never had a problem with my sexuality so didn't really see the point in asking for 'help' to cope with it. The shock was everyone else's. I'd been comfortable with it for a couple of years by that point. It was old hat to me.
Comments
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_youngest_birth_mothers
confirms it here.
As for myself, I started noticing my liking for other guys when I was in primary school. Just the odd sneaky peek now and again in gym etc. The attraction grew from there really.
I remember having "crushes" on people pre puberty although they were nothing like what I experience now, there was no sexual element to it.
It might have something to do with you being a feminine person but I don't get what it has to do with being gay. I'm not saying your wrong I just I don't get it.
Did you consider psychiatric help ? not for being gay but for having a crush on Gary Barlow.:D
I'm confused by the amount of people who don't think under tens have any attraction to anyone whatsoever - while it might not be attraction as you find in your teens, I know of plenty of examples of little kids who have 'crushes' of some sort on other kids, teachers, older siblings of their friends, celebs, cartoon characters! When I was about 5 there was a little boy at school who used to want to hold my hand all the time because he 'fancied me', as much as a 5 year old can fancy anyone. But, to get to my point, I think it's pretty well documented that to varying extents, even young, young children are able to feel 'attraction' of some sort to certain people. It may have no bearing on their eventual sexuality, but then again, it might.
Whenever I read some of your posts...You could've been my secret twin (:o:eek::p). Though I'm (cough) pretty str8 now (something I had to work on!) I was a fully fledged tranny when I was 4-5! Rarely a day went by without me being told off/spanked for exiting the 'wendy house' in full frock (the more floral the better) and over-sized heels... What saved me from being too nelly was the fact I liked chicks with guns! So, Charlies Angels was a chance to play dress up but also to carry a pistol! Accessorize, bitch! I still have a terrible school photo circa 1976 of my 'Purdey' haircut.
And yes, David Van Day was f$*£ing lush in his day! but my first crush was David Cassidy & Parker Stevenson from Hardy Boys & Nancy Drew Mysteries and... The Man From Atlantis....!:o;)
Perhpas these "crushes" are cultural though? everywhere Children go and look, they see heterosexual relationships. Obviously, children are very easily influenced. Maybe that "attraction" is there because society tells them it should be? I don't know of many young children who admit same-sex crushes- bearing in mind that at ages you have siuggested, children would most likely be too young to understand homosexuality is a bit of a taboo subject- so if it were a natural attraction, they'd know no better.
I think its a mixture of the influences/experiences you recieve in your first 6-7 years, backed up by your own genetics leaning a certain way. I dont believe its just genetics or just influences, I think the two go hand-in-hand.
Me and Simon spoke about it when we were about 15 and said if we were gay (we knew we were) we'd have to put up with other people's hostile attitude and probably move to somewhere move accepting. We both moved away, separately. I met up with him years later in London. We were both incredibly glad we'd decided to be who we were, and that we'd moved away from a tiny coastal town where we would have had to hide who we were. Honestly, what sort of existance is that?
As for fumblings with other boys, this goes on all the time in school. I had fumblings with many boys who are now happily married, they weren't gay, they used wanted some sort of sexual experience, any sort of sexual experience.
'Tiny coastal towns' have a lot to answer for! And yep, 'any sort of sexual experience' strikes the right note.;)
I finally figured I'm a more gay than straight bisexy, which is pretty annoying really.
For me personally I think to some extent I have always known. I get the point about it not being sexual for children and it certainly wasn't for me until I hit puberty but I always knew I was fond of boys in a 'special' way from the age of about 4 or 5. I never had any remotely similar feelings about girls.
In fact, I went through a bit of a period of being anxious (in general) when I was 9, and actually sort of came out to my parents then; saying that I was worried I might be gay! :eek: (obviously being scared about being different).
After that I kind of forgot about it again and it wasn't until I was 13 and a gay friend asked me whether I was gay that I had to think about it and confront and admit it. I haven't looked back since then.
I then came out properly when I was 15.
I was about 16 when I knew that the person I was was a homosexual
There is a moment where it's accepted within yourself, I remember that moment quite clearly. It was like I'd just seen a blue fox of something pass in front of me in the street. 'Shit! I'm actually gay'. It still took a few couple of years to say anything to anyone though.
What got me was the number of people who phoned to offer support or to give numbers for advice/helplines. Beyond that moment I never had a problem with my sexuality so didn't really see the point in asking for 'help' to cope with it. The shock was everyone else's. I'd been comfortable with it for a couple of years by that point. It was old hat to me.
Same. It was the worse day of my life.