eHarmony

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 135
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    Not being funny but if you can't pull from POF then your doing something MASSIVELY wrong!

    I am no fantastic looking guy but I went on there for 2 weeks and had dozens of people message me.

    How? Simples, write a really easy going, friendly, descriptive, very positive and mostly funny profile that makes a girl giggle and think "wow he is a bit different"
    Don't bother adding more than a couple of genuine photo's of your face (NO topless shots) because the more you add, the worse your likely to look
    Then make sure you tick the box that says "Let users see you browsed their profile" button......

    Then go browsing all the girls..... just click on each profile, looking at their pics and having a read. Eventually a few of them will look back at yours (curiosity in women is a bitch) and when they do (by checking in the VIEWED ME) bit,....... write to them saying something like "Hey, saw you checked my profile, wanted to say Hello and say thanks for peeking. How are you finding the site so far, any successes yet?"

    7 times out of 10 they write back (most girls I chat to say they receive 1 nice email for every 8 pervy ones) and then just chat to them, light hearted, friendly, a bit of non-sexual humour and your well away!
    And for gods sake do not mention your willy, photo's, sex questions, etc unless SHE leads with that stuff! Girls will sniff out desperate sex attempts very quickly and rip you a new hole before blocking you! If your after that stuff, be patient and let them lead..... if you show your a nice guy and fun to chat to, they will soon move the subject to sexy topics as most on their are gagging for it but dont like to show it or be asked it...... but even when they broach sexual subjects, play coy and a tiny bit innocent but open minded so they lead and control the chat. That way they will offer to do things to you that you (apparently) never tried!

    If you cant get a girlfriend/laid out of those tips you seriously need to consider something new to try because its near foolproof! (Either that or I am the Romeo of the Online Dating culture!)

    PS - I put NOT SINGLE and looking for FRIENDS on my profile and STILL got decent looking girls flirting with me wanting to chat and get to know me!

    No offence, but from what you've put, you sound really unappealing.
  • hotmat3khotmat3k Posts: 1,496
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    Not being funny but if you can't pull from POF then your doing something MASSIVELY wrong!

    I am no fantastic looking guy but I went on there for 2 weeks and had dozens of people message me.

    How? Simples, write a really easy going, friendly, descriptive, very positive and mostly funny profile that makes a girl giggle and think "wow he is a bit different"
    Don't bother adding more than a couple of genuine photo's of your face (NO topless shots) because the more you add, the worse your likely to look
    Then make sure you tick the box that says "Let users see you browsed their profile" button......

    Then go browsing all the girls..... just click on each profile, looking at their pics and having a read. Eventually a few of them will look back at yours (curiosity in women is a bitch) and when they do (by checking in the VIEWED ME) bit,....... write to them saying something like "Hey, saw you checked my profile, wanted to say Hello and say thanks for peeking. How are you finding the site so far, any successes yet?"

    7 times out of 10 they write back (most girls I chat to say they receive 1 nice email for every 8 pervy ones) and then just chat to them, light hearted, friendly, a bit of non-sexual humour and your well away!
    And for gods sake do not mention your willy, photo's, sex questions, etc unless SHE leads with that stuff! Girls will sniff out desperate sex attempts very quickly and rip you a new hole before blocking you! If your after that stuff, be patient and let them lead..... if you show your a nice guy and fun to chat to, they will soon move the subject to sexy topics as most on their are gagging for it but dont like to show it or be asked it...... but even when they broach sexual subjects, play coy and a tiny bit innocent but open minded so they lead and control the chat. That way they will offer to do things to you that you (apparently) never tried!

    If you cant get a girlfriend/laid out of those tips you seriously need to consider something new to try because its near foolproof! (Either that or I am the Romeo of the Online Dating culture!)

    PS - I put NOT SINGLE and looking for FRIENDS on my profile and STILL got decent looking girls flirting with me wanting to chat and get to know me!
    It's people like you that give us genuine guys a bad rep in general :rolleyes:. Dating isn't foolproof. Only your foolery is certain. :D Sounds like you're a bit of a pervy freak to be honest n'all!
  • Jon OJon O Posts: 1,687
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    hotmat3k wrote: »
    It's people like you that give us genuine guys a bad rep in general :rolleyes:. Dating isn't foolproof. Only your foolery is certain. :D Sounds like you're a bit of a pervy freak to be honest n'all!

    You are describing me I can be a bit of a pervy freak when I need to be ;)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    Shappy wrote: »
    Thanks grotbags1. I think as you said before, it's good to be questioning. I used to get annoyed by this kind of stuff from internet guys before; now I just deprioritise them just as they have me.

    Good to hear you're chatting with someone else. At least your guys are keen on meeting up - mine just seem to hide behind their profiles or text messages.

    Oh I've had some of those as well Shappy.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    hotmat3k wrote: »
    It's people like you that give us genuine guys a bad rep in general :rolleyes:. Dating isn't foolproof. Only your foolery is certain. :D Sounds like you're a bit of a pervy freak to be honest n'all!

    Hehe, I agree.

    I doubt you'd want to chat with any of the girls he's chatting to anyway as they sound just as bad!

    Check out the home page address in his profile.
  • hotmat3khotmat3k Posts: 1,496
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    grotbags1 wrote: »
    Hehe, I agree.

    I doubt you'd want to chat with any of the girls he's chatting to anyway as they sound just as bad!

    Check out the home page address in his profile.
    I dare to think what's behind that URL just in case it's NSFW. But it pretty much sums up FTR. I had enough with my ex being exactly how FTR describes that type. Would be happy pass them on to FTR. :rolleyes:
  • ShappyShappy Posts: 14,531
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    Not being funny but if you can't pull from POF then your doing something MASSIVELY wrong!

    If you cant get a girlfriend/laid out of those tips you seriously need to consider something new to try because its near foolproof! (Either that or I am the Romeo of the Online Dating culture!)

    PS - I put NOT SINGLE and looking for FRIENDS on my profile and STILL got decent looking girls flirting with me wanting to chat and get to know me!

    But did you actually manage to get a girlfriend from your strategy? Most (if not all) people that have contributed to this thread are looking for a serious relationship and not a quick shag or some webcam action.
  • bob_fossilbob_fossil Posts: 797
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    What's the 'norm' for contacting people on these sites? I joined recently, and have talked to a few people, and have got on quite well with someone. But if you're contacting someone, do you ignore other people sending you messages, or you talk to a lot of people? I'm still weirded out by the process, so any advice would be great.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    bob_fossil wrote: »
    What's the 'norm' for contacting people on these sites? I joined recently, and have talked to a few people, and have got on quite well with someone. But if you're contacting someone, do you ignore other people sending you messages, or you talk to a lot of people? I'm still weirded out by the process, so any advice would be great.

    Hmmm, I'm not sure as generally, there's hardly anyone I want to chat with, so usually I'm just chatting with one person as that's the only person I'm interested in.

    I don't think you should ignore the other messages though as they could also be a contender, however, I think maybe once you've met with one person once or twice and think it's going to go somewhere should you then think about it a bit more.

    That's the idea of of it is to get know a number of people, so messaging/chatting with a number of them isn't dating them, so you can keep your options open.
  • ShappyShappy Posts: 14,531
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    bob_fossil wrote: »
    What's the 'norm' for contacting people on these sites? I joined recently, and have talked to a few people, and have got on quite well with someone. But if you're contacting someone, do you ignore other people sending you messages, or you talk to a lot of people? I'm still weirded out by the process, so any advice would be great.

    Agree with grotbags1, when you're just messaging people or chatting on the phone it's probably considered okay to be contacting multiple people. Once you get past the first or second date, it's probably best to narrow it down. Personally I couldn't be seeing more than one person if I was kissing any of them - that would feel icky!

    I texted that guy that cancelled last Tuesday and he replied telling me about his plans for the week. Still hasn't suggested another date to meet. Hate all these inane texts. :yawn:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    Shappy wrote: »
    Agree with grotbags1, when you're just messaging people or chatting on the phone it's probably considered okay to be contacting multiple people. Once you get past the first or second date, it's probably best to narrow it down. Personally I couldn't be seeing more than one person if I was kissing any of them - that would feel icky!

    I texted that guy that cancelled last Tuesday and he replied telling me about his plans for the week. Still hasn't suggested another date to meet. Hate all these inane texts. :yawn:

    ARGH, what's his game?! Why doesn't he just say one way or the other if he wants to see you or not.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    so a little update, I have had a phone chat with the new contact and we're aiming to meet for a drink on Wednesday. I will keep you posted!
  • hotmat3khotmat3k Posts: 1,496
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    grotbags1 wrote: »
    so a little update, I have had a phone chat with the new contact and we're aiming to meet for a drink on Wednesday. I will keep you posted!
    Nice one grots! Wish you good luck and hope it's a start of something. :)
  • bob_fossilbob_fossil Posts: 797
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    Thanks for getting back to me, grotbags & shappy! Hard to know what to do, so thanks for your advice :)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    hotmat3k wrote: »
    Nice one grots! Wish you good luck and hope it's a start of something. :)

    haha, thanks
  • hotmat3khotmat3k Posts: 1,496
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    grotbags1 wrote: »
    haha, thanks

    No problem! I've sent some intro messages to some girls on MSF recently. No replies yet :(. I think the 20s age bracket of girls is a much tougher field.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    hotmat3k wrote: »
    No problem! I've sent some intro messages to some girls on MSF recently. No replies yet :(. I think the 20s age bracket of girls is a much tougher field.

    hmmm, there's time yet. I always reply to say thanks, whether I want to pursue a chat or not, I wish everyone else would.

    keep at it, your dream girl is out there :)
  • ShappyShappy Posts: 14,531
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    grotbags1 wrote: »
    ARGH, what's his game?! Why doesn't he just say one way or the other if he wants to see you or not.

    Well I didn't bother replying to his silly text yesterday about building snowmen so this morning he texted again finally asking me if I wanted to meet this evening. As I am already on my way into work with no make-up and wearing a huge unfashionable jumper, I said I was busy. I suggested next week as I am generally feeling poorly. He was okay about it so will see if a meeting happens next week.

    Fingers crossed for your date tomorrow, very exciting!
  • Jon OJon O Posts: 1,687
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    Why on earth do people use internet dating sites?

    Just go to a club and there are plenty of women waiting to be picked up.

    If you are into older women go to "Grab A Granny" there can be some hot older women there who are gagging for it. ;)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    Jon O wrote: »
    Why on earth do people use internet dating sites?

    Just go to a club and there are plenty of women waiting to be picked up.

    If you are into older women go to "Grab A Granny" there can be some hot older women there who are gagging for it. ;)

    I've seen an example of your posts in wench's thread, and this post is pretty much as useless as all of your others.

    I am a woman and I don't attend any such places to be "picked Up" nor would I ever want to. I have standards which I suspect you would never meet.
  • Jon OJon O Posts: 1,687
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    grotbags1 wrote: »
    I've seen an example of your posts in wench's thread, and this post is pretty much as useless as all of your others.

    I am a woman and I don't attend any such places to be "picked Up" nor would I ever want to. I have standards which I suspect you would never meet.


    I have standards myself and I actually met my wife at a Club in Newcastle it was lust at first sight:p
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    Shappy wrote: »
    Well I didn't bother replying to his silly text yesterday about building snowmen so this morning he texted again finally asking me if I wanted to meet this evening. As I am already on my way into work with no make-up and wearing a huge unfashionable jumper, I said I was busy. I suggested next week as I am generally feeling poorly. He was okay about it so will see if a meeting happens next week.

    Fingers crossed for your date tomorrow, very exciting!

    Meeting this evening, hmmm bit short notice, the cheeky thing.

    Thanks for keeping your fingers crossed for tomorrow, we'll just have to wait and see. As we've all said it's impossible to tell until you meet them in person.
  • User68571User68571 Posts: 3,901
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    Jon O wrote: »
    I have standards myself and I actually met my wife at a Club in Newcastle it was lust at first sight:p

    Is this the wife that left you??? Which you detailed out in another thread ;)

    Quoted from the relevant thread (post 3)

    "Never get involved with a married woman because it will all end in tears. I had an affair 3 years ago and my wife found out and I am now living alone in a flat and my kids don't want to know me. The woman concerned left me and went back to her husband because she decided I was too immature. Biggest mistake of my life I wish I could turn back the clock"

    Link - http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showthread.php?p=63656214&highlight=#post63656214

    I just love the justification after you were called out on it

    Quoted:

    "That wasn't about me but my brother who is called Jon. I pretended it was me incase I wasn't beleived. I am a happily married man who sometimes sleeps with call girls when I am bored. I use his name online I am really called Brian which I have never liked people always mispell it as Brain which I find annoying"

    Link - http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1784388&page=16

    Wow what a catch 'Jon' is :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::yawn:
  • ShappyShappy Posts: 14,531
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    Let's not let certain undesirables derail this lovely thread.
    grotbags1 wrote: »
    Meeting this evening, hmmm bit short notice, the cheeky thing.

    Thanks for keeping your fingers crossed for tomorrow, we'll just have to wait and see. As we've all said it's impossible to tell until you meet them in person.

    I've had men ask me to meet them at short notice before as well - I think some of them just don't get that we have to get ready for date! Can't just turn up after work looking like our normal selves! :D

    So tell us a bit more about this bloke you're meeting (sorry if you've done so before already). Is he local? What is he like?
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    Shappy wrote: »
    Let's not let certain undesirables derail this lovely thread.



    I've had men ask me to meet them at short notice before as well - I think some of them just don't get that we have to get ready for date! Can't just turn up after work looking like our normal selves! :D

    So tell us a bit more about this bloke you're meeting (sorry if you've done so before already). Is he local? What is he like?

    Exactly and not only having to get ready, but you have a life as well, you're not free every evening in case he asks you out!

    ok, so he's been on POF for 2 weeks, been single for a year, only had one date in that time. So not a serial dater which is good (says me who is having 2 dates within a week :o). He works in the same industry as me and so far seems very nice and polite in his messages and phone chat. I hope he's not reading this!

    He is fairly local - about 25 miles away. We've not made arrangements yet for tomorrow as in where we'll meet, but it'll just be a drink.
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