I was just stood up! I'm quite surprised to be finding it mostly pretty hilarious. I'm forty one, he's a supposedly sensible forty one year old grown up man, not a fourteen year old. We had one date last week which went really well. We've talked a lot on text since then, arranged to meet up on Monday which he had to cancel shortly beforehand, but at least he told me, and the reason he gave me sounded honest. Today he just didn't turn up. I texted him to say I was there, was he on his way etc, and no reply. After ten minutes or so I decided I'd head home, and twenty minutes later he texted to say he'd gone home because of a raging toothache. No apology, no apology for not having told me in advance, nothing. I'm just a bit gobsmacked that a grown man can be so rubbish! Well I'm not really, but honestly! How do people think that's ok?
I don't care much, I'm now comfy in my pyjamas with a giant pizza in the oven, a cold beer and a purring cat on my lap.
Aargh, some people are so rude!
He sounds iffy to me, but have an idea, talk about where you both live, what it's like etc, then say you'd like to see where he lives. If he's honest he'll show you, and invite you in for a drink, or cuppa and cake, just to be sociable. Or he'll make some excuse not to show you where he lives. Good luck:)
I was just stood up! I'm quite surprised to be finding it mostly pretty hilarious. I'm forty one, he's a supposedly sensible forty one year old grown up man, not a fourteen year old. We had one date last week which went really well. We've talked a lot on text since then, arranged to meet up on Monday which he had to cancel shortly beforehand, but at least he told me, and the reason he gave me sounded honest. Today he just didn't turn up. I texted him to say I was there, was he on his way etc, and no reply. After ten minutes or so I decided I'd head home, and twenty minutes later he texted to say he'd gone home because of a raging toothache. No apology, no apology for not having told me in advance, nothing. I'm just a bit gobsmacked that a grown man can be so rubbish! Well I'm not really, but honestly! How do people think that's ok?
I don't care much, I'm now comfy in my pyjamas with a giant pizza in the oven, a cold beer and a purring cat on my lap.
Aargh, some people are so rude!
To me personally, after a 'nice' first date, if a man/boy of any age only wanted to text me and not want to hear my dulcet tones again, I would be looking elsewhere.
To me personally, after a 'nice' first date, if a man/boy of any age only wanted to text me and not want to hear my dulcet tones again, I would be looking elsewhere.
Well dulcet tones is in the ear of the beholder, just like beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
No.it was me.It was the white jacket she said she'd be wearing.That was my cue to run.It was like Moby Dick.
I wouldn't do such a horrible thing these days though.
At least you can see the funny side. I'd hate to go through all that hassle again, but at least you found out what he's like sooner rather than later.
I thought I had been stood up once and was bloody raging tbh. I was only 16 and thought i'd got my first "grown up" girlfriend. I waited 40 minutes, missed my bus home, stormed into the nearest pub, necked two pints, and wrote something rude about my "girlfriend" on the gent's toilet wall. She was there when I went back to the bus station though. I ended up marrying her too.
At least you can see the funny side. I'd hate to go through all that hassle again, but at least you found out what he's like sooner rather than later.
I thought I had been stood up once and was bloody raging tbh. I was only 16 and thought i'd got my first "grown up" girlfriend. I waited 40 minutes, missed my bus home, stormed into the nearest pub, necked two pints, and wrote something rude about my "girlfriend" on the gent's toilet wall. She was there when I went back to the bus station though. I ended up marrying her too.
I stood a boy up when I was about 14 years old. It is a very immature thing to do, if you don't want to date someone have the guts to admit it instead of messing them around.
Thanks everyone. Just to clarify - I wasn't so bothered about the last minute cancellations (although they're disappointing and not showing hugely good signs) but more about the lack of warning or apology of any kind. I know that stuff happens, that pain or illness or whatever can totally take over at times. But the lack of respect in not even letting someone know I find bizarre.
Whether he's married or not, it takes 20 seconds to send a text to say 'sorry, can't make it!' If he genuinely didn't want to see me again, obviously I'd prefer he just said so flat out, or even just stopped contacting altogether, but to keep saying you want to see someone and arranging dates and then not making it is very odd to me.
Oh well! You live and learn. I know I'd been single for a long time, maybe people have changed since I last tried this lark! But as someone who always tries to be honest and upfront and trusting, I can't help thinking it's not a change for the better.
Thanks everyone. Just to clarify - I wasn't so bothered about the last minute cancellations (although they're disappointing and not showing hugely good signs) but more about the lack of warning or apology of any kind. I know that stuff happens, that pain or illness or whatever can totally take over at times. But the lack of respect in not even letting someone know I find bizarre.
Whether he's married or not, it takes 20 seconds to send a text to say 'sorry, can't make it!' If he genuinely didn't want to see me again, obviously I'd prefer he just said so flat out, or even just stopped contacting altogether, but to keep saying you want to see someone and arranging dates and then not making it is very odd to me.
Oh well! You live and learn. I know I'd been single for a long time, maybe people have changed since I last tried this lark! But as someone who always tries to be honest and upfront and trusting, I can't help thinking it's not a change for the better.
I guess all you can do is keep looking for 'that guy'. Tbh, I've pretty well given up on this at the age of nearly 50, so have resigned myself to the fact I'm destined to be single for the rest of my life, as in not being in a long term relationship or married. I met the 'love of my life' when I was 21, but due to circumstances, i.e. I was too young to get into a long term serious relationship at that age and being a student, plus her mother interfering in proceedings, it wasn't to be. In the meantime, I haven't met anyone that even comes close to this woman. The trouble is the older you get, the more you are less willing to compromise and the more you get set in your ways.
I guess all you can do is keep looking for 'that guy'. Tbh, I've pretty well given up on this at the age of nearly 50, so have resigned myself to the fact I'm destined to be single for the rest of my life, as in not being in a long term relationship or married. I met the 'love of my life' when I was 21, but due to circumstances, i.e. I was too young to get into a long term serious relationship at that age and being a student, plus her mother interfering in proceedings, it wasn't to be. In the meantime, I haven't met anyone that even comes close to this woman. The trouble is the older you get, the more you are less willing to compromise and the more you get set in your ways.
I have heard life begins at 50, so I wouldn't give up yet ;-)
At least you can see the funny side. I'd hate to go through all that hassle again, but at least you found out what he's like sooner rather than later.
I thought I had been stood up once and was bloody raging tbh. I was only 16 and thought i'd got my first "grown up" girlfriend. I waited 40 minutes, missed my bus home, stormed into the nearest pub, necked two pints, and wrote something rude about my "girlfriend" on the gent's toilet wall. She was there when I went back to the bus station though. I ended up marrying her too.
I was just stood up! I'm quite surprised to be finding it mostly pretty hilarious. I'm forty one, he's a supposedly sensible forty one year old grown up man, not a fourteen year old. We had one date last week which went really well. We've talked a lot on text since then, arranged to meet up on Monday which he had to cancel shortly beforehand, but at least he told me, and the reason he gave me sounded honest. Today he just didn't turn up. I texted him to say I was there, was he on his way etc, and no reply. After ten minutes or so I decided I'd head home, and twenty minutes later he texted to say he'd gone home because of a raging toothache. No apology, no apology for not having told me in advance, nothing. I'm just a bit gobsmacked that a grown man can be so rubbish! Well I'm not really, but honestly! How do people think that's ok?
I don't care much, I'm now comfy in my pyjamas with a giant pizza in the oven, a cold beer and a purring cat on my lap.
Aargh, some people are so rude!
As another poster said, it's obvious he's either married or has a live-in partner/significant other. He cancelled because he couldn't wriggle out of whatever they'd arranged or had to pick the kids up. If he'd've had any honesty, he'd've called/texted to rearrange, which I presume he has not. The other possibility is that he's the kind of man who finds it difficult to say no to someone.
I've seen this happen so often - when men say "Oh, I don't have a home phone actually", or "I'm sort of living in different places at the moment", it usually means that they're in a LTR and want you as a bit of fluff on the side, sad to say.
Comments
Yes I am serious, or have got somebody else to do it on my behalf if the agony of the toothache was to much to bare.
To me personally, after a 'nice' first date, if a man/boy of any age only wanted to text me and not want to hear my dulcet tones again, I would be looking elsewhere.
Well dulcet tones is in the ear of the beholder, just like beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
That's funny:D:D
Exactly, and a Man of any worth would have ignored any incoming texts and left it at that, instead of arranging further dates via text.
I thought I had been stood up once and was bloody raging tbh. I was only 16 and thought i'd got my first "grown up" girlfriend. I waited 40 minutes, missed my bus home, stormed into the nearest pub, necked two pints, and wrote something rude about my "girlfriend" on the gent's toilet wall. She was there when I went back to the bus station though. I ended up marrying her too.
Great post, and there wasn't a text in sight
Thanks. Good point - no mobiles, no texts, and the closest thing to facebook was the time I slammed an encyclopedia shut on my little brother's nose.
Think we've just found another candidate to add to the thread on Cool. Are you British?
Whether he's married or not, it takes 20 seconds to send a text to say 'sorry, can't make it!' If he genuinely didn't want to see me again, obviously I'd prefer he just said so flat out, or even just stopped contacting altogether, but to keep saying you want to see someone and arranging dates and then not making it is very odd to me.
Oh well! You live and learn. I know I'd been single for a long time, maybe people have changed since I last tried this lark! But as someone who always tries to be honest and upfront and trusting, I can't help thinking it's not a change for the better.
I guess all you can do is keep looking for 'that guy'. Tbh, I've pretty well given up on this at the age of nearly 50, so have resigned myself to the fact I'm destined to be single for the rest of my life, as in not being in a long term relationship or married. I met the 'love of my life' when I was 21, but due to circumstances, i.e. I was too young to get into a long term serious relationship at that age and being a student, plus her mother interfering in proceedings, it wasn't to be. In the meantime, I haven't met anyone that even comes close to this woman. The trouble is the older you get, the more you are less willing to compromise and the more you get set in your ways.
I have heard life begins at 50, so I wouldn't give up yet ;-)
What post(s) and what STD thread?
I don't intend to have children until I am well into my 30s. A lot of my friends have been tied down by having children too young in my opinion.
http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showpost.php?p=71242444&postcount=31
I still don't follow...
(and that it was sat on your lap right now)
As another poster said, it's obvious he's either married or has a live-in partner/significant other. He cancelled because he couldn't wriggle out of whatever they'd arranged or had to pick the kids up. If he'd've had any honesty, he'd've called/texted to rearrange, which I presume he has not. The other possibility is that he's the kind of man who finds it difficult to say no to someone.
I've seen this happen so often - when men say "Oh, I don't have a home phone actually", or "I'm sort of living in different places at the moment", it usually means that they're in a LTR and want you as a bit of fluff on the side, sad to say.
Avoid
Why thank you, i've not been described as cool for some time. Yes, I am British.
But if we are right about him then one party clearly doesn't!