Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4)

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  • LizzyrozLizzyroz Posts: 844
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    Despite her alcoholism her sister sounds like a lady who enjoyed life, unlike Liz with her constant complaints and whinges.

    A coroner wouldn't tell you stuff like that over the phone either.
  • Suzy_CatSuzy_Cat Posts: 1,368
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    ‘I bet people feel sorry for you: rich woman with no friends’ (that was a policeman!) I apply this test: would they have said that to a man? And the answer is always a resounding no.

    Would they, though, have said it to a man who wrote a weekly, widely circulated column largely about their rich-man lifestyle and inexplicable inability to form normal human relationships? Who had also appeared on various television programmes expounding on same? And had written books that also covered these topics, along with his preference for animals over people?

    I think the answer would be a resounding YES.
  • PorcupinePorcupine Posts: 25,231
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    Is it me, or is Liz getting more and more work with the Daily Mail at the moment. It feels like every article is written by Liz Jones lately.
  • PolominiPolomini Posts: 533
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    Porcupine wrote: »
    Is it me, or is Liz getting more and more work with the Daily Mail at the moment. It feels like every article is written by Liz Jones lately.

    She doesn't appear to write for the Daily Mail at all now, but she's all over The Mail on Sunday.
  • LizzyrozLizzyroz Posts: 844
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    Polomini wrote: »
    She doesn't appear to write for the Daily Mail at all now, but she's all over The Mail on Sunday.

    She seems to do a lot of pieces in the 'Right Minds' section, which is strange as she's definitely not in hers.
  • Rubbish NameRubbish Name Posts: 619
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    Suzy_Cat wrote: »
    ‘I bet people feel sorry for you: rich woman with no friends’ (that was a policeman!) I apply this test: would they have said that to a man? And the answer is always a resounding no.

    Would they, though, have said it to a man who wrote a weekly, widely circulated column largely about their rich-man lifestyle and inexplicable inability to form normal human relationships? Who had also appeared on various television programmes expounding on same? And had written books that also covered these topics, along with his preference for animals over people?

    I think the answer would be a resounding YES.

    Precisely. I imagine that the likes of Piers Morgan and Whathisname Littlejohn are constantly receiving comments like that (or probably worse).
    It's not them, Liz, it's you.
  • dorydaryldorydaryl Posts: 15,927
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    Lizzyroz wrote: »
    ''If I ruled the world there wouldn't be any humans.....because I don't like humans very much''.

    She makes that perfectly obvious every week when she criticises The Baker.

    I find that people who have that attitude to life are either very wounded people or not very likeable themselves.
    Sometimes, if you look for the best in people, that's exactly what you get.
  • Suzy_CatSuzy_Cat Posts: 1,368
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    I just can't understand why it matters to her at her age to have "a boyfriend" when she doesn't like people at all. Really, just embrace the cat-lady status and become totally animal focused. It's not a bad way to be. If you have a man in your life and you don't actually enjoy having him around, and he creates nothing but stress for you, it's kinder to let him go off and have a relationship with someone who actually wants him around.

    On the other hand if she truly wants a relationship with the Baker she has to accept him warts and all. He's rather like an animal in a way. His actions towards her are a bit cringing and fearful, knowing as he does that she might snap at him. She wouldn't expect a dog to change its ways - she doesn't! - so why does she expect him to? If it's OK for her various nervous animals to wee all over the place and attack each other, and it's OK for her to be obnoxious because she's so sensitive and deaf and also overworked, then it's OK for him to be a slob and often caught up in his own issues.

    The elephant article sits unpleasantly with me not because I don't think she should be revealing this (actually fairly widely-known) issue - on the contrary. But her snobbery and disdain for humans in general means that she doesn't come up with anything bar "oh the poor elephants". She notes, disainfully, that the workers who "look after" the elephants have government-supplied smartphones. She doesn't dig into why these men are doing this work, and what they would do if they did not have this work. Solutions, Liz. Analyse.

    In other news, I agree, she does appear to be earning her half a mill in the past few weeks. Knocking the articles out.
  • alaninmcralaninmcr Posts: 1,685
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    Suzy_Cat wrote: »
    I just can't understand why it matters to her at her age to have "a boyfriend" when she doesn't like people at all.

    Because she dreams of having a husband, large house in the country, paddock, horses, dogs. She wrote a piece a while back about how wrong it was that someone she knew had all that and the world was so unfair that it was not her's. The boyfriend/husband is just part of what she believes she deserves.
  • hickenhicken Posts: 4,454
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    Polomini wrote: »
    She doesn't appear to write for the Daily Mail at all now, but she's all over The Mail on Sunday.

    They dropped her after she did CBB.
  • Suzy_CatSuzy_Cat Posts: 1,368
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    alaninmcr wrote: »
    Because she dreams of having a husband, large house in the country, paddock, horses, dogs. She wrote a piece a while back about how wrong it was that someone she knew had all that and the world was so unfair that it was not her's. The boyfriend/husband is just part of what she believes she deserves.

    But she's HAD all that, albeit not at the same time. Husbands unfortunately aren't accessories.

    I've just been watching the series Humans. Liz needs a synth. Seriously, it would be perfect for her.
  • tszujmetszujme Posts: 1,221
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    Lizzyroz wrote: »
    Despite her alcoholism her sister sounds like a lady who enjoyed life, unlike Liz with her constant complaints and whinges.

    A coroner wouldn't tell you stuff like that over the phone either.
    I hate defending La Liz even a little bit, but when my mum died last year the coroner told me the cause of death over the phone, and told me some pretty graphic stuff about the autopsy.

    The rest of the article is fairly disgraceful.
  • LizzyrozLizzyroz Posts: 844
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    tszujme wrote: »
    I hate defending La Liz even a little bit, but when my mum died last year the coroner told me the cause of death over the phone, and told me some pretty graphic stuff about the autopsy.

    The rest of the article is fairly disgraceful.

    When my parents died the only place I saw anything about cause of death was on their death certificates, and no one would tell me anything over the phone.

    Things must have changed.
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    Lizzyroz wrote: »
    She seems to do a lot of pieces in the 'Right Minds' section, which is strange as she's definitely not in hers.


    :D:D:D
  • seventhwaveseventhwave Posts: 4,967
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    Suzy_Cat wrote: »
    I just can't understand why it matters to her at her age to have "a boyfriend" when she doesn't like people at all.

    Well, we know why she wants DScrace (she's clinging to her fantasy of him as "the one that got away", and even if she doesn't particularly want him now, she doesn't want him to go back to "Diminutive Gong Li" ... or move onto someone else who makes Liz feel insecure in comparison.) More generally though, I think she wants a boyfriend because she sees it as a sign of success and popularity, and to soothe her self-esteem. She buys expensive designer clothes and shoes, has tons of beauty treatments, supposedly blows thousands at Jo Hansford getting her hair done (though we question that) yet she still doesn't get that "reassurance" of men telling her she's beautiful
  • BellagioBellagio Posts: 3,249
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    In the latest Dreary, she claims neither she nor her sister know where the recently departed other sister is buried. Be that so, and frankly I don't believe it, might that be because you couldn't be arsed to ask ?

    She also apologises - sort of - for the disgraceful way she handled her sister's passing, in another article.
  • amikolaichekamikolaichek Posts: 531
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    Her article in the MoS, about cheating men ... I'm still sniggering at her comment about her ex husband 'His career didn’t do too well after we split up, not because he wasn’t clever and talented, but because I was a colossus, straddling the media.' And how DARE she blame it all on women - God, she must really LOATHE her own sex because she never lets up criticising and demeaning them.

    Also note her comment that she didn't give ex husband a penny. Er ...it's on record that he actually he didn't ASK for a penny, which quite impressed me.

    Today's 'Dreary' - must have been a fun hen do - just Liz and one sister. And isn't it interesting how she always has to mention how much she's spent ... today, it's £120 for taking David out for belated birthday dinner.

    As for that TV appearance she was blathering on about - didn't see it, but from the sound of the programme, for the first time ever, I rather like Katie Hopkins, not because of her 'fattist' remarks (shame) but for having a few digs at the Lizard!
  • seventhwaveseventhwave Posts: 4,967
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    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-3201914/LIZ-JONES-S-DIARY-hen-night-pampering-waste-time.html

    Now I can't claim to be any great authority but I thought a hen night would usually take place just before the wedding (i.e. the night or weekend before; maybe a month at the most, if you're doing the whole go away on holiday package)? Not when you apparently haven't set a date yet and aren't even sure whether you want to marry the person

    And Liz invokes Godwin's Law therefore inherently losing whatever argument it is she was trying to make ...
  • fizzycatfizzycat Posts: 6,120
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    Now I can't claim to be any great authority but I thought a hen night would usually take place just before the wedding (i.e. the night or weekend before; maybe a month at the most, if you're doing the whole go away on holiday package)? Not when you apparently haven't set a date yet and aren't even sure whether you want to marry the person
    ...

    Perhaps she thinks calling it a hen night justifies the cost of what was really a very expensive girly awayday - rooms at that place start at £600+ a night and I can't find prices for their cottages on the website. Not bad for someone who couldn't afford to eat a couple of weeks ago. (And has the tax issue been sorted out yet?)

    Or perhaps she's got the hen night in early so she's had that bit of the Disney princess fantasy she's playing at? And if David runs for his life, she has far more poor meeee to work with - 'He jilted me after my hen night' sounds more dramatic than 'He saw sense before we set the date'.
  • Suzy_CatSuzy_Cat Posts: 1,368
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    It's just exhausting. If him being a slob and a bit vague is a dealbreaker then BREAK THE DEAL. Anybody who marries someone thinking they can change him is an idiot. Anyone who does so pushing 60 and with one marriage behind them is just asking for trouble. She WANTS this to fail. I suppose she thinks there's another book in it.
  • seventhwaveseventhwave Posts: 4,967
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    Liz last week: "Men are disgusting, rude, fat pigs. Women are goddesses. Why do we even allow them to continue breathing the same air as us?"

    Liz this week: "Men are saints, and women are terrible bitches! That's why all the men cheat on us! We need to stop, or we'll lose the good men who love us. Now here's an account of how I sniped at my fiancé after returning from my untimely 'hen night.'"

    Liz next week: ???
  • Rubbish NameRubbish Name Posts: 619
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    In which nothing happens.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-3210068/LIZ-JONES-S-DIARY-arrange-brief-encounter.html
    Warning: There is discussion of the state of her pants.
  • Rubbish NameRubbish Name Posts: 619
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    More boring fare - how I'm finally going to tackle my crippling anxiety. Again. Or, more accurately, how I'm going to waste the time of a yet another professional and completely ignore everything I'm taught. Again.
    "I’m a cliché, a failure." Yes. Yes, you are.

    Finally, I'm tackling my fears...thanks to Valium and Bear Grylls
  • mourinhosmissusmourinhosmissus Posts: 5,591
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    For Christ's sake...
    I sometimes wouldn’t visit my late mum as I was scared of the carer. I wouldn’t leave my flat in case the porter spoke to me. In Celebrity Big Brother, I was so terrified I spent each night throwing up. It’s exhausting, being scared

    But not too scared to tear a strip off any poor shop assistant who dares to ask if she has a Nectar card?

    Unbelievable shite.
  • seventhwaveseventhwave Posts: 4,967
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    Yeah, I really didn't need to think about Liz in her underwear, settling down to watch 50 Shades with DScrace ...
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