Jumping on the 'Faux Grief' Bandwagon.
hmeister
Posts: 2,371 Forum Member
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Why to people feel the need to express their false grief these days whenever someone dies? Most of the time they barely know them or don't even know them at all.
Last week a man from my Village died a few days before his 40th. He wasn't a nice man but for some reason my Facebook was full of 'RIP ____ you were a great lad' and 'Can't believe the news I've just heard, you were an amazing person'.
Then you get people acting all hysterical when a celebrity dies and taking to social media to express their shock even though the celebrity was a train wreck or when someone like Justin Bieber has a headache you see #PrayForJustin trending for 2 weeks.
I find it all very uncomfortable. When somebody I know dies I don't think they'd want me to go on social media to scream about it so other people can pretend to to be sad.
Last week a man from my Village died a few days before his 40th. He wasn't a nice man but for some reason my Facebook was full of 'RIP ____ you were a great lad' and 'Can't believe the news I've just heard, you were an amazing person'.
Then you get people acting all hysterical when a celebrity dies and taking to social media to express their shock even though the celebrity was a train wreck or when someone like Justin Bieber has a headache you see #PrayForJustin trending for 2 weeks.
I find it all very uncomfortable. When somebody I know dies I don't think they'd want me to go on social media to scream about it so other people can pretend to to be sad.
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Or her.
I've seen many cases over the years of people trolling Facebook condolence pages as some kind of half-arsed "protest" at "grief porn" or whichever catchphrase they're using that week.
if people want to express sadness that another human being has passed away, let them!. Nobody should assume any kind of dominion over what people can say and about who.
I agree.
Just once it would be nice to hear: 'He shouldn't have been killed, but frankly he was an asshole who got on everyone's tits'
I just find it annoying that people seem to get off on displaying grief for the sake of it when it's obvious they're just jumping on the bandwagon so they can join in with other people.
I know I'm coming across as heartless and insensitive but I would only grieve for people who are close to me. Not someone I've only met few times at the pub.
As the post above me says, how do you know they're jumping on the bandwagon ?.
Expressing sadness at someone's passing isn't, IMO, grieving for them. It's exactly what it says on the tin - simply expressing sadness. Grieving for someone is a whole different kettle of fish and, again IMO, most likely would be for someone you are close to.
I'd say like many things, in some cases it's fairly easy to spot.
How can you tell some people are baiting on the internet? How can you tell someone is being a troll if they don't come directly out and say 'I'm a troll'?
Same principle applies.
I take the point from those asking- 'who are we to be the arbiters of who can grieve and to what extent' etc but it's pretty clear that some people DO jump on various bandwagons and this is no exception IMO,
The only time I ever felt like this was when my grandfather died. When he was ill it was just immediate family that visited him and yet when he died it emerged that he was somewhat of a local figure. I met people at his funeral that I'd never seen before or since. At the time there was a little bit of me thinking "and where were you last month if you thought he was so wonderful" - especially when one red-haired guy started giving a theatrical speech in my grandfather's house pre-funeral about how great he was - but I later understood that in my grief I was thinking very badly of these people. Not that I said anything at the time but I remember talking about it with my Mum later and remarking on all these people I didn't know at his funeral. I was still a kid though really and I needed somewhere to direct my own hurt.
What I'm saying is that when it comes to grief I think it's best not to judge another person's against your own. These times are difficult for everyone and people express themselves differently. Some people crawl into a corner and hide and others build the Taj Mahal.
IDGAF how or when other people wish to express their grief/non-grief, whatever.
It's up to them and as long as they're not harming anyone else then I have no issue.
FB settings are easily changed.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2196255/Princess-Dianas-death-marked-15-years-floral-tributes-pour-Kensington-Palace.html
I was totally cringing at all the mass hysteria in this country when Diana died.
God knows what the rest of the world thought.
It was like the founding of a new religion - grown men blubbing in the street over someone they had never met - more so than if their own mother or wife had died.
How embarrassing.
I wonder what they were like at the funerals of their actual relatives?
They hide behind the anonymity of Social Media ,if the sentiment is heartfelt it seems a harmless thing to do.
This little island embarrassed me after her death.
It was like we had seen the end of the second coming or some such, I also found the applause totally out of place and cringeworthy... Ditto elt john and his rehashed little song that millions bought by the bucket load.
Ain't that the truth.
The scrote probably enjoyed revving the b-st-ard thing at 2 in the morning and pissing off hundreds of people. That doesn't deserve the death sentence, we've all been daft, but ... who sets the scene for tragedy?
I see nothing wrong with it.
I appreciate that the xfactor generation may be puzzled by such a concept.