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Katy Perry's Magic Foo

BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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in Showbiz #1
http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/showbiz/news/a294492/katy-perry-i-have-sexual-magic-tricks.html

I wonder if this involves hankies, or doves?

Comments

  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #2
    It's all smoke and mirrors I reckon.:eek::D
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #3
    that must create havoc in her knickers
  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #4
    Maybe she went to Thailand and learned a few things with ping pong balls and live animals!?

    Actually I feel sorry for any woman who thinks having 'tricks' up her vagina or being a **** in the bedroom is the key to keeping a roving man. Sorry luv but that's not how it works. A bloke who gets his kicks out of screwing around will mess around with other women for one reason only: BECAUSE they're not you.
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #5
    Exactly. I squirm a bit at declarations like this...she's so confident that her minny-skills will be able to keep him that she insists on telling everyone..
  • phil solophil solo Posts: 9,669
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    #6
    BellaFiga wrote: »
    http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/showbiz/news/a294492/katy-perry-i-have-sexual-magic-tricks.html

    I wonder if this involves hankies, or doves?

    Probably nothing special. I expect it just means she takes it up the Gary :D
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #7
    well that's something fresh and new for Russell Brand, I'm sure!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 500
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    #8
    How can she ever ask for privacy when all she does is talk about her personal life? I don't dislike her or Russell, but they are the very definition of fame-****!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,665
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    #9
    Lets hope she keeps these tricks for when shes my wife
  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #10
    BBFanaticMark wrote: »
    Lets hope she keeps these tricks for when shes my wife

    You would really want Brand's sloppy seconds? Anyway, you may wish to be sure what these magical qualities her vagina has first! One man's magic is another man's WTF is that :eek:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,665
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    #11
    crystal_meth wrote: »
    You would really want Brand's sloppy seconds? Anyway, you may wish to be sure what these magical qualities her vagina has first! One man's magic is another man's WTF is that :eek:

    Its KATY PERRY
    I wouldn't care
    haha
  • Daisy BennybootsDaisy Bennyboots Posts: 18,375
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    #12
    "There are weekends for Russ and weekends for me and my friends"

    Sounds like a cracking marriage :rolleyes:

    Wouldn't you want to spend every weekend with a new spouse?! I can't bear to be without mine for more than one night. I'm not a wuss...it's just the strong bond of new commitment.
  • Squealer_MahonySquealer_Mahony Posts: 6,483
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    #13
    BellaFiga wrote: »
    Exactly. I squirm a bit at declarations like this...she's so confident that her minny-skills will be able to keep him that she insists on telling everyone..

    And they've only been married 5 minutes.
  • wavlovrwavlovr Posts: 3,741
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    #14
    I bet having sex with Katy Perry would be like dropping a pin into the Grand Canyon
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #15
    It's amusing to me how celebrities go to such lengths to assure us they have the most amazing, outrageous, innovative and original SEX. There are only so many holes and pieces of furniture and kitchen implements one can employ. I note she doesn't disclose the nature of her magic tricks - probably because they would turn out to be so mundane everyone would go oooooh that. Yeah, I used to do that.
  • Digital SidDigital Sid Posts: 39,870
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    #16
    BellaFiga wrote: »
    Exactly. I squirm a bit at declarations like this...she's so confident that her minny-skills will be able to keep him that she insists on telling everyone..
    BellaFiga wrote: »
    It's amusing to me how celebrities go to such lengths to assure us they have the most amazing, outrageous, innovative and original SEX. There are only so many holes and pieces of furniture and kitchen implements one can employ. I note she doesn't disclose the nature of her magic tricks - probably because they would turn out to be so mundane everyone would go oooooh that. Yeah, I used to do that.

    Meow.
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #17
    no meowing necessary. I genuinely hope they have a long and happy union. I just think it odd that celebrities need to go on about how smashing and different to the rest of us their sex life is.
  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #18
    In support of BellaFiga, I don't think it's a case of 'meow'.

    Katy Perry (or rather isn't she called Katy Brand now?) has put herself in a stupid position. Firstly, she's claimed within 5 mins of marriage that she's 'tamed' serial womaniser, compulsive sex addict, Russell. Then she's stated it was via her sexual prowess. Then embellished that idea by -somewhat laughably- adding 'magic powers' to her vagina.

    If she used her brain for 5 mins she may wonder where these statements have now left her. Looking unrealistically optimisic, arrogant, and damn stupid if Brand fks around on her. Also, there's nothing that makes a compulsive womaniser run off to the nearest brothel than hearing that his wife is going around town claiming to have 'tamed' him - in their heads this is the equivalent to be officially debollocked and emasculated and their ego forces them to prove their manhood. Imagine the headlines if / when Russell messes around or leaves her!? The magic is over blah ....
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #19
    it is Katy Brand now, but that's just too confusing as we already have one. Interesting her birth name is Hudson but she couldn't use that because there's a Kate Hudson.

    Yes, I just feel a little oooooooooooh don't say that about all this magic foo cock taming business. Russell has committed to her and I hope he continues too, but she's going to look ever so daft if her magic minge loses its hold.
  • seal bseal b Posts: 541
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    #20
    Hate people who feel the need to talk about their sex life. Especially if their sex life involves that vile man **** Russel Brand, eurgh!
  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #21
    I wonder if Russell is referring to his 'magic wand'?

    The original Katy Brand must be bemused at her new namesake! I do hope she isn't going to follow suit and start issuing forth declarations about her vaginal properties!
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #22
    It's entirely possible she might! I think she needs to capitalise on the fact that there is a Katy Brand impostor in our midst...
  • crystal_methcrystal_meth Posts: 8,379
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    #23
    BellaFiga wrote: »
    It's entirely possible she might! I think she needs to capitalise on the fact that there is a Katy Brand impostor in our midst...

    I would LOVE to see Katy Brand Original do an impersonation of Katy Brand Perry! Doing some singing from an ice cream van and then whipping out magic tricks and bunny rabbits from her nether regions! :D

    * Big shout out to KB Mach 1 < JUST DO IT!
  • BellaFigaBellaFiga Posts: 1,982
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    #24
    crystal_meth wrote: »
    I would LOVE to see Katy Brand Original do an impersonation of Katy Brand Perry! Doing some singing from an ice cream van and then whipping out magic tricks and bunny rabbits from her nether regions! :D

    * Big shout out to KB Mach 1 < JUST DO IT!

    Absolutely!
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