Gay online dating

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,116
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Hi all,

I am a 22 year old male and I am thinking of giving this a go. I haven't got anything to lose.

I find some of the sites like gaydar a bit off putting! I don't want to hook up with guys for intercourse. I want to get to know someone first.

I find that where I live there are no guys like myself so I thought this may be a good way to meet someone. Has anyone done online dating? Has it worked for you? Do you give out your full name at first?

Comments

  • simondsUU933wsimondsUU933w Posts: 4,175
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    Strict wrote: »
    I find that where I live there are no guys like myself so I thought this may be a good way to meet someone. Has anyone done online dating? Has it worked for you? Do you give out your full name at first?

    Only gay in the village eh?! I think you'll find there are plenty of guys near you and online dating may well help find them. Up to you whether you give out your real name but I'd suggest it's not a great start to any relationship when you tell them two weeks down the line that you're not really 'Dave'!
  • workhorseworkhorse Posts: 2,836
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    Give it go but if its a proper relationship your after why not put an ad in your regional paper,perhaps along the lines of only people who want a genuine relationship apply.
  • simondsUU933wsimondsUU933w Posts: 4,175
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    workhorse wrote: »
    Give it go but if its a proper relationship your after why not put an ad in your regional paper,perhaps along the lines of only people who want a genuine relationship apply.

    lol alright granddad! First time I've heard advice to put an ad in the local paper over online dating in years ;)
  • workhorseworkhorse Posts: 2,836
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    simonp820 wrote: »
    lol alright granddad! First time I've heard advice to put an ad in the local paper over online dating in years ;)

    ha ha
    But if it works,he could meet that special person he has dreamed of.
  • MattehhhftwMattehhhftw Posts: 8,680
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    I tried it and gave up after a while... but you go for it! You might meet Mr. Right :)
  • malpascmalpasc Posts: 9,626
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    www.outeverywhere.com

    Its a gay "social network" so you have profiles, but you also have discussion forums, social events in the real world etc. Its emphasis is more on a social, getting to know you basis rather than the 'dial a shag' that Gaydar is aimed at.

    I met my partner of now 8 years on Outeverywhere!
  • stud u likestud u like Posts: 42,100
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    You should try a professional dating site. Unfortunately, these cost.

    The Guardian Soulmates.
    Gay Parship

    I dislike online dating as the ones I have found were dysfunctional numbskulls who were married and obsessed with the "Shag 'n' Go" mentality.

    In the USA, false advertising on dating sites is soon going to be a criminal offence.
  • ChickenWingsChickenWings Posts: 2,057
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    I'm on every gay "dating" website *cough* there is and I think it's going to be really hard to find a relationship through one like this, to be honest.

    I mainly use them for finding sex, but I did manage to get a boyfriend through one (we met for sex, then ended up liking each other more than we expected, and started seeing each other properly).

    So it's clearly possible... but if you go in their straight off the bat saying NOT HERE FOR SEX etc. etc. then it is going to be an uphill battle I'm afraid, as I'd guesstimate about 85% of guys on those kinda sites are looking for that sorta thing. That leaves 15% of people who aren't though, which isn't too bad, but of course you're not guaranteed to be attracted (physically and emotionally) to these 15%.

    Go for it, but you're gonna have to get used to seeing 70+ display pics of penises a day, lots of dirty messages asking if you're up for "fun" with pics attached, people messaging you saying what they want to do to you, etc. It can be a bit much if you're not looking for sex, but such is the nature of the beast. You'll just have to try and overcome it!
  • aero63aero63 Posts: 183
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    I went on a gay phoneline over eleven years ago looking for sex; arranged a one night stand with someone and we're still together. Sometimes things just work out.
  • toyotacitytoyotacity Posts: 762
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    Another vote for outeverywhere.com a great site for making friends and who knows what will come from it

    Gaydar - I hate it with a passion, people are all talk on there, sit copying and pasting the same crap all the time, and trying to find decent guys who can hold a conversation....forget it. I'm open about my hiv on there...maybe that's why I probably didn't get any interest....i'm pleased I deleted
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,313
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    OkCupid worked for me.
  • FizzbinFizzbin Posts: 36,827
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    aero63 wrote: »
    I went on a gay phoneline over eleven years ago looking for sex; arranged a one night stand with someone and we're still together. Sometimes things just work out.
    Same for me, except it was 23 years ago.
  • Welsh-ladWelsh-lad Posts: 51,908
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    Everyone berates gaydar ( ive done so myself) but in the end there are some nice people on there. Its particularly good when moving to a new area and getting chatting.

    I didnt meet o/h on there but i did have a few nice dates back in the day and i've still lovely friends I found on gaydar. There are obviously loads on there who want 'fun'', but it's pretty in your face and evident what they want. If you don't want the same you just send them that No Thanks automated message thing.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 445
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    aero63 wrote: »
    I went on a gay phoneline over eleven years ago looking for sex; arranged a one night stand with someone and we're still together. Sometimes things just work out.

    I love this.
    I'm not gay but met my husband on line on person.com. Neither of us were looking for anything special. But we just met and hit it off. Now we are happily married. !
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,116
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    Hi all thanks for the advise. I am going to give it a go. Ill keep you updated.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,306
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    you can meet men on gay apps/websites, Ive met men that Ive gone on to have relationships with. Gaydar has been okay for me, yes you do get timewasters loonies on there but you will most places. My current partner I met on Recon which is the last place I thought Id find anyone on apart from hook ups.

    Good luck and have fun and don't get too hung up on finding a boyfriend/partner
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