I'm not sure what to think of this girl

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,561
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Basically I met this girl in class, she hung out with some of my classmates and I had to go there too to hang out but I couldn't. Then when I talked with her on Facebook, she asked me to hang out with her. Again I didn't, because I was afraid of meeting her personal friends. Few days later she asked me to hangout again bu I couldn't go because I had no money. We talked a bit today during the class break while she smoked, then we hung out after classes finished. I can't say I done much personal things with her because there were always some classmates with us too. Then I decided to ask her for another hangout tomorrow, since we weren't supposed to attend classes (early in the morning, 8 AM). She said she can't come over because she can't wake up that early and she told me that we might hang out later that day, during afternoon. I'm not sure what to think. I mean, today when we talked, she was smiling and kind of laughing at every thing I said, but she seemed too friendly and she didn't start flirting either. Maybe I should have flirted. I don't know. Then I don't know if she wanted to hang out with me only to meet me as a friend and not as a lover, since she acted kinda neutral today. I'm confused really.

To sum it up, I really like this girl and unsure if she likes me too. I'm not sure whether to start flirting or not and don't want to scare her away. She seems interested but I'm unsure whether she wants to see me as a friend or potential boyfriend. How do I know?
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  • JackKlugmanJackKlugman Posts: 5,362
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    You like to use the words "hang out"

    You cant really ask her out because if you do you will be awkward for everyone if she says no. Just leave things the way they are, she certainly does not appear to be that into you
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,561
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    You like to use the words "hang out"

    You cant really ask her out because if you do you will be awkward for everyone if she says no. Just leave things the way they are, she certainly does not appear to be that into you

    :D:D:D I should have said that this story is actually about my friend. He tried to register here to post for advice but has to wait on his account being activated so I posted on behalf of him.

    What makes you think she doesn't seem into him? What are the signs of "friend zone"?
  • haphashhaphash Posts: 21,448
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    Why does your friend think that she isn't keen just because she didn't want to 'hang out' at 8am? Perhaps she is just not a morning person. Other than that she sounds quite keen to be in the company of your friend. As to whether her interest is just to be 'friends' or as a potential boyfriend who knows. Your friend should talk to her a bit more and take it slowly then all will become clear. If she doesn't mention a boyfriend then he is in with a chance.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,561
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    haphash wrote: »
    Why does your friend think that she isn't keen just because she didn't want to 'hang out' at 8am? Perhaps she is just not a morning person. Other than that she sounds quite keen to be in the company of your friend. As to whether her interest is just to be 'friends' or as a potential boyfriend who knows. Your friend should talk to her a bit more and take it slowly then all will become clear. If she doesn't mention a boyfriend then he is in with a chance.

    The girl is single. :)

    If she doesn't message him tomorrow about hanging out again, should he mention it to her? Or just leave it?
  • Babe RainbowBabe Rainbow Posts: 34,349
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »
    :D:D:DI should have said that this story is actually about my friend. He tried to register here to post for advice but has to wait on his account being activated so I posted on behalf of him.

    What makes you think she doesn't seem into him? What are the signs of "friend zone"?

    I think it would be better to wait for your friend's account to be activated so that he can explain it in his words instead of second hand. Doing it this way will cause all sorts of problems when he is activated.
  • cris182cris182 Posts: 9,595
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    If you (Not buying the 'friend' bit) ask her out and she says yes, Will you still insist on not seeing her friends and make things awkward for her?1
  • FlibustierFlibustier Posts: 994
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    Sounds like she is looking for a gay best friend.

    Take that role. Be the sister she never had.

    One day she will be so devastated after a breakup, she will turn to you a and let u inside the magic kingdom..
  • Pumping IronPumping Iron Posts: 29,891
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    Flibustier wrote: »
    Sounds like she is looking for a gay best friend.

    Take that role. Be the sister she never had.

    One day she will be so devastated after a breakup, she will turn to you a and let u inside the magic kingdom..

    Good advice.
  • Frankie_LittleFrankie_Little Posts: 9,271
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    What does hang out even mean? I just picture kids hanging off the monkey bars in the playground like this!.
    Is it the new word for courting?

    Your friend should have waited for his account to be activated, he may not be best pleased you've asked for advice on his behalf.

    This young lady sounds very sensible, declining the invitation to hang out at 8am. How very unsocial, that's almost the middle of the night. I have to say, from what you've described, she sounds a bit disinterested in you, I mean your friend, as a potential lover. Sorry.
  • marianna01marianna01 Posts: 2,598
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »
    Basically I met this girl in class, she hung out with some of my classmates and I had to go there too to hang out but I couldn't. Then when I talked with her on Facebook, she asked me to hang out with her. Again I didn't, because I was afraid of meeting her personal friends. Few days later she asked me to hangout again bu I couldn't go because I had no money. We talked a bit today during the class break while she smoked, then we hung out after classes finished. I can't say I done much personal things with her because there were always some classmates with us too. Then I decided to ask her for another hangout tomorrow, since we weren't supposed to attend classes (early in the morning, 8 AM). She said she can't come over because she can't wake up that early and she told me that we might hang out later that day, during afternoon. I'm not sure what to think. I mean, today when we talked, she was smiling and kind of laughing at every thing I said, but she seemed too friendly and she didn't start flirting either. Maybe I should have flirted. I don't know. Then I don't know if she wanted to hang out with me only to meet me as a friend and not as a lover, since she acted kinda neutral today. I'm confused really.

    To sum it up, I really like this girl and unsure if she likes me too. I'm not sure whether to start flirting or not and don't want to scare her away. She seems interested but I'm unsure whether she wants to see me as a friend or potential boyfriend. How do I know?

    I would stay in school, stick to English lessons and forget about hanging out with this 'neutral' girl - for now at least.

    Flirting is not a learned art - it just happens naturally if you really fancy someone!
  • Babe RainbowBabe Rainbow Posts: 34,349
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    marianna01 wrote: »
    I would stay in school, stick to English lessons and forget about hanging out with this 'neutral' girl - for now at least.

    Flirting is not a learned art - it just happens naturally if you really fancy someone!

    Not for everybody.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,561
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    marianna01 wrote: »
    I would stay in school, stick to English lessons and forget about hanging out with this 'neutral' girl - for now at least.

    There's no real need for that first comment was there?

    Hmm, I should say thanks for the replies but I didn't appreciate the sarcasm and jokes and stuff. I did ask clearly a couple of times how do you know if a girl likes you or if you're friend zoned but you all seem to have missed that. I understand that this isn't a dating site and I didn't give you much information to work with, but I've always believed if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

    Believe it or not I did post this on behalf of my friend (and he's saw the replies) and while he started off being keen and interested to see what people thought and what advice you had to offer him, he's now wishing we didn't bother in the first place. :(
  • FlibustierFlibustier Posts: 994
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »
    , but I've always believed if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

    Maybe give men a go..
  • Frankie_LittleFrankie_Little Posts: 9,271
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »
    There's no real need for that first comment was there?

    Hmm, I should say thanks for the replies but I didn't appreciate the sarcasm and jokes and stuff. I did ask clearly a couple of times how do you know if a girl likes you or if you're friend zoned but you all seem to have missed that. I understand that this isn't a dating site and I didn't give you much information to work with, but I've always believed if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

    Believe it or not I did post this on behalf of my friend (and he's saw the replies) and while he started off being keen and interested to see what people thought and what advice you had to offer him, he's now wishing we didn't bother in the first place. :(
    He should have posted his dilemma himself, you must realise that the 'my friend asked me to ask you' stuff just invites sarcastic comments.
    It's easy to find out if you've been friendzoned - she shows no romantic inclination towards you, she sees you as her best friend or brother, she says she likes you but you're too nice for her etc etc etc

    Read this on how to turn it all around.

    http://www.wikihow.com/Escape-the-Friend-Zone
  • marianna01marianna01 Posts: 2,598
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »
    There's no real need for that first comment was there?

    Hmm, I should say thanks for the replies but I didn't appreciate the sarcasm and jokes and stuff. I did ask clearly a couple of times how do you know if a girl likes you or if you're friend zoned but you all seem to have missed that. I understand that this isn't a dating site and I didn't give you much information to work with, but I've always believed if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

    Believe it or not I did post this on behalf of my friend (and he's saw the replies) and while he started off being keen and interested to see what people thought and what advice you had to offer him, he's now wishing we didn't bother in the first place. :(

    I will stay with my first observation(s) here!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 32,379
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    marianna01 wrote: »
    I would stay in school, stick to English lessons and forget about hanging out with this 'neutral' girl - for now at least.

    Flirting is not a learned art - it just happens naturally if you really fancy someone!

    They haven't taught paragraphs yet. It might come in his next lesson.

    I couldn't read that.
  • JackKlugmanJackKlugman Posts: 5,362
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    Shadow2009 wrote: »

    Believe it or not I did post this on behalf of my friend (and he's saw the replies) and while he started off being keen and interested to see what people thought and what advice you had to offer him, he's now wishing we didn't bother in the first place. :(

    Tell your friend/yourself that very rarely do people ask for relationship advice on this forum and get anything helpful.

    You/your friend should stop stressing and planning and just see how things naturally progress.
  • netcurtainsnetcurtains Posts: 23,494
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    Putting my parent head on, I say concentrate on school, you've got your GCSE's in a couple of years, they are more important than girls right now and for heaven's sake tell her to quit smoking before she's properly addicted!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1
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    Sorry guys but your posts were useless. I'm OP's friend and I have asked him to post the topic for me. I was confused and mad not only because of this girl in particular, but because of pressure I put on myself. Anyway, your opinions about this situation were also totally wrong and off the track. I presume you've never had a girlfriend before. This topic can get locked now, there's no room for any other trolls.
  • Frankie_LittleFrankie_Little Posts: 9,271
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    xantheose wrote: »
    Sorry guys but your posts were useless. I'm OP's friend and I have asked him to post the topic for me. I was confused and mad not only because of this girl in particular, but because of pressure I put on myself. Anyway, your opinions about this situation were also totally wrong and off the track. I presume you've never had a girlfriend before. This topic can get locked now, there's no room for any other trolls.
    Who are you presuming has never had a girlfriend? Any specific poster or everyone who has posted on this thread? Personally speaking, I have NEVER had a girlfriend but that's almost certainly because I'm a straight female.

    Oh and if you want the thread locked, I believe the correct procedure is to contact one of the forum administrators.
  • Babe RainbowBabe Rainbow Posts: 34,349
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    xantheose wrote: »
    Sorry guys but your posts were useless. I'm OP's friend and I have asked him to post the topic for me. I was confused and mad not only because of this girl in particular, but because of pressure I put on myself. Anyway, your opinions about this situation were also totally wrong and off the track. I presume you've never had a girlfriend before. This topic can get locked now, there's no room for any other trolls.

    Hardly surprising, or anybody elses fault, when the story came by proxy.

    Next time, might help if you do it in your own voice with your own interpretation.
  • JackKlugmanJackKlugman Posts: 5,362
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    xantheose wrote: »
    Sorry guys but your posts were useless. I'm OP's friend and I have asked him to post the topic for me. I was confused and mad not only because of this girl in particular, but because of pressure I put on myself. Anyway, your opinions about this situation were also totally wrong and off the track. I presume you've never had a girlfriend before. This topic can get locked now, there's no room for any other trolls.

    I have never had a girlfriend? How come I am married then?
  • rumpleteazerrumpleteazer Posts: 5,746
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    I have never had a girlfriend? How come I am married then?

    Arranged marriage clearly :D
  • Frankie_LittleFrankie_Little Posts: 9,271
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    I have never had a girlfriend? How come I am married then?
    Did you hang out prior to proposing though?
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