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The fairy & the immigrant
MacLovin
Posts: 2,769
Forum Member
✭✭✭
A beautiful fairy appeared one day to an immigrant claimant
outside the Social Security Offices.
'My good man,' the fairy said,
'I've been told to grant you three wishes,
since you’ve just arrived in Britain with your wife and seven children.'
The man told the fairy: 'Well, where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.'
The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and
PING!!!
He had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth!
'What else?' asked the fairy, 'two, more wishes, to go'.
The refugee claimant now got bolder.
'I need a big house with a three car garage in Birmingham with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my refugee relatives who still live in my country.
I want to bring them all over here.
PING!
In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ, and a sparkling swimming pool and a BMW,
full of his nephews playing their music.
'One, more wish, left for you', said the fairy, waving her wand.
I want to be British with British clothes instead of rags, and shawl and I want to have white skin like the British.'
PING!
The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans from ASDA, a dirty Primark T-shirt and a greasy baseball cap.
He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon.
'What happened to my new teeth?' he wailed.
'Where is my new house? Where’s my Visa Gold Card?'
The fairy said 'Tough luck. Now that you are British you're entitled to sweet f*** all like the rest of us”. And she disappeared.
outside the Social Security Offices.
'My good man,' the fairy said,
'I've been told to grant you three wishes,
since you’ve just arrived in Britain with your wife and seven children.'
The man told the fairy: 'Well, where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.'
The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and
PING!!!
He had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth!
'What else?' asked the fairy, 'two, more wishes, to go'.
The refugee claimant now got bolder.
'I need a big house with a three car garage in Birmingham with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my refugee relatives who still live in my country.
I want to bring them all over here.
PING!
In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ, and a sparkling swimming pool and a BMW,
full of his nephews playing their music.
'One, more wish, left for you', said the fairy, waving her wand.
I want to be British with British clothes instead of rags, and shawl and I want to have white skin like the British.'
PING!
The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans from ASDA, a dirty Primark T-shirt and a greasy baseball cap.
He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon.
'What happened to my new teeth?' he wailed.
'Where is my new house? Where’s my Visa Gold Card?'
The fairy said 'Tough luck. Now that you are British you're entitled to sweet f*** all like the rest of us”. And she disappeared.
0
Comments
The last sentence isn't quite true to date for most.
And your agenda is?
'If you are a homeowner(or spouse) and receive any of the following benefits,you'll qualify'.
Income support
Housing benefit
Disabled persons tax credit
Income based job seekers allowance
Attendance allowance
Council tax benefits
Child tax credit(annual income less than £16400)
Working tax credit(annual income less than £16400)
Disability living allowance
Pension credit
Over 70 years old.
Oh guess what?.I'm none of the above.I guess i'll just have to subsidise all of the above and pay the full whack myself.:mad:
So presumably your income is high enough for you to be none of the above? And therefore you can pay for it yourself?
As for the OP...:rolleyes: I wish someone had told me and my "seven children" about all these wonderful benefits and mansions when I moved here...funnily enough me and my family just had to work like everyone else.
Free insulation should be for everyone.Putting such a leaflet through my door is just rubbing my nose in it.
I'm all for helping out the less fortunate in our society but this is just taking the piss.
I´m not sure if you´re being ironic or not. The whole point is that people who earn less don´t have to go without basics. If you´re fortunate enough to have a job and earn enough not to be on benefits, then quit whinging (you as in people in general). Why give freebies to someone who´s already well off? Doesn´t make sense.
What is it with this self pitying victimhood stuff? How does it possibly make sense for the poor to blame those who are, in reality, even poorer, for their problems? The political class and rags like the DM have got you doing their work for them. It's almost too easy.
Sounds like the invitation list for Hackney Council's christmas party.
cosmo made a funny, everyone look :rolleyes:
Yeah,it's about time people with children on £44k a year ceased to have Child tax credits thrown at them.
They can give them money,yet i can't get a little bit of free insulation.I don't think there's any fairness in that whatsoever.Hopefully Dave and Nick will put a stop to that bit of nonsense quite soon.
He He!.
What, and cut their own throats? More likely to cut stuff for the poor.
Just think - whilst all the mugs have to slave away their every waken hour just to keep a roof over their head, you could be sitting on your arse watching Jeremy Kyle and playing computer games all day, and be entitled to free insulation.
Yeah, because it's only the ****less that get the breaks, right?
Actually, bollocks. Anyone can fall on hard times, even those that "work and study hard". Stop with the self pitying, already.
I know plenty of my patients who have worked hard all their life, but become ill and disabled and receive the benefits listed above. That's the welfare state, and it's generally a very good thing.
EDIT: mad DS filters, blocking F E C K less and letting "bollocks" through.
I think everyone,rich and poor alike will all suffer.I guess we have to pay back all that cash we (the taxpayer) owes.
They can start,once i've got my free insulation.:D
How many unemployed are there that do actually fit into that category? How many are really lazy, bone idle slobs that no intention of ever working?
You've used it twice in this thread already.
This is true.Council estates with thousands of doleys with no intention of getting out of their beds anytime before 10am.They pride themselves on not working.
I guess the only time they have to get up early is when the guys come to fit their free cavity and loft insulation.
I don't think the rich are going to suffer. They don't need social care or the services that are going to be cut.
They'll be fine, thank you. Let's all blame the immigrants, not the banks.
You stop feeling sorry for yourself, and I'll stop using it. Deal?
Link or STFU
I agree there are many thousands who through no fault of their own have went down the slippery slope.They deserve all the help available.
However.There are many more thousands who are total lazy chancers who pride themselves on seeing how much they can get for nothing.They're going to get a wake up call soon.Theiving benefit parasites,bleeding this country dry.,
They'll dismiss that one.