Hi MissPinotGrigio blimey there are a lot of posts here.
Anyway I see scanning through that Plenty of Fish has a fair few mentions. I wonder if this would be a good place to begin, more so with it being free.
It's a shame you can't tour this sites a little without signing in.
Hi MissPinotGrigio blimey there are a lot of posts here.
Anyway I see scanning through that Plenty of Fish has a fair few mentions. I wonder if this would be a good place to begin, more so with it being free.
It's a shame you can't tour this sites a little without signing in.
Well I guess you can always tour, and switch your profile off from being searched so that you don't get scared off. You can put up a blank profile too at first if you just want to lurk but it could prove tricky then when you see someone you like. Try that for a week or two and see how you feel
Well I guess you can always tour, and switch your profile off from being searched so that you don't get scared off. You can put up a blank profile too at first if you just want to lurk but it could prove tricky then when you see someone you like. Try that for a week or two and see how you feel
Thanks. I take it with the paid sites you can sign up for free and create a profile but not do more than that until you subscribe. I think if I go down that route I'll try Zoosk first, it seems to be popular at the moment according to some online reviews.
Hey. Everyone's different, but I have a particularly aggressive approach, and I do this because the minute I respond to someone I'm not interested in, I *always* either get horrible abuse back (which I of course report) or about 20 "why don't you like me?" emails. If I'm not interested, I delete and block. Simple. I hate to tar them all with the same brush and I do realise it seems aggressive, but trust me, it makes life SOOOOO much easier. I've had a guy try to find out my personal details from it too and send me a friends request on Facebook apropos of purely finding me on OK Cupid (where my real name isn't even featured!) so it's best to just cut yourself off if you aren't interested. A lot of these folks are very defensive, or have fragile egos too, so if you tell them why you'll just end up getting a "well, thanks for that! You know what YOUR problem is?" And that's just from sending a "Hi, sorry, but you're not my type/I go for older guys and you're too young for me, sorry, but I hope you find someone lovely here. Good luck" mail as opposed to a "you're ugly and ya smell" type mail!!!!
Otherwise you're just wasting your own time, or you'll eventually depress yourself having pointless arguments with internet w*nkers when you could be having fun with far more appropriate guys for you instead. And after a few days they'll stop coming up in your search results too. Result!
Ah, I hadn't thought about the block option, I guess I need to utilize that a bit more. I only reserved that for the really special ones
It is a wonder sometimes what goes through their minds with some of the opening lines i've had......
Bonjour! I have been away a while. School trip to Paris and a horrendous workload. Back now though! What have I missed?
My dates with the osteopath came to nothing. We agreed there wasn't much chemistry and whilst he's lovely and perfect on paper, something just wasn't THERE. Boo.
Bonjour! I have been away a while. School trip to Paris and a horrendous workload. Back now though! What have I missed?
My dates with the osteopath came to nothing. We agreed there wasn't much chemistry and whilst he's lovely and perfect on paper, something just wasn't THERE. Boo.
So come on, all! What's your news?!
Was thinking about you the other day my sweet! Not in that way, well, at least that's what I'll reveal here
Sorry to hear about the osteopath but you can't force the old square peg into a round hole. If it ain't there.......
Anyone else on the horizon? How's the 30Dates stuff going?
Was thinking about you the other day my sweet! Not in that way, well, at least that's what I'll reveal here
Sorry to hear about the osteopath but you can't force the old square peg into a round hole. If it ain't there.......
Anyone else on the horizon? How's the 30Dates stuff going?
HAHAHAHA! Brilliant.
It's going OK! Am doing another submission this week so keep an eye out. I've been permabusy for the past few weeks so have barely been able to do much, but I'm going to get my teeth into it now a lot more. Might as well; it's not like I'm getting any action anywhere else!!
Well, we'll see. He's quietly handsome and has the same sick, twisted sense of humour that I have. But he could smell in real life!!!! I shall report back post-Sunday.
Oh, and I'm off next week. And turn another year older, but I'm embracing that, as I've heard some very sad, tragic news amongst various folks I know over the last week so well done me for reaching another birthday. Even if it is an "old" one
What do folks think about guys who've given you a petname before you've even met them?
Conversing with a guy at the moment *
But he keeps calling me "my pretty one" or "my chicken noodle" (noodle being my nickname) even though he knows my first name.
He seems a nice enough guy but eveytime he calls me "my pretty one" it makes me cringe so much, I get this vision of golum and the ring saying "my precious" over and over!!
I'm meeting him next wednesday so I really hope he doesn't say that to my face...... or am I being an unromantic ballbreaker?
* Miss PG - this is dead gran guy, and although I may have secretly nicknamed him I certainly wouldn't actually call him that!
Well, we'll see. He's quietly handsome and has the same sick, twisted sense of humour that I have. But he could smell in real life!!!! I shall report back post-Sunday.
Oh, and I'm off next week. And turn another year older, but I'm embracing that, as I've heard some very sad, tragic news amongst various folks I know over the last week so well done me for reaching another birthday. Even if it is an "old" one
What do folks think about guys who've given you a petname before you've even met them?
Conversing with a guy at the moment *
But he keeps calling me "my pretty one" or "my chicken noodle" (noodle being my nickname) even though he knows my first name.
He seems a nice enough guy but eveytime he calls me "my pretty one" it makes me cringe so much, I get this vision of golum and the ring saying "my precious" over and over!!
I'm meeting him next wednesday so I really hope he doesn't say that to my face...... or am I being an unromantic ballbreaker?
* Miss PG - this is dead gran guy, and although I may have secretly nicknamed him I certainly wouldn't actually call him that!
Thanks for the b-day wishes Wench
He wouldn't happen to be Portugese, would he? Calling someone "XXXxxx one" seems to be a cultural thing there, I spoke about it with Portugese guy a few weeks ago, hence why Jose Mourinhio calls himself "The Special One".
I'd just tell him politely but firmly, "er, I really appreciate the compliment but 'my pretty one' doesn't sound right, how about something else?". I'm laughing at Noodle though, I have an FB friend who jokingly calls her surname Pot-Noodle (she's double-barrelled) and her cover pic at one point was a Chinese Takeaway called "Noodle Love" :D:D:D
And "Dead Gran Guy" - let's not even go there!!!! Ha! So she's still very much dead then I take it, and legitimately so? Always worth checkin'
He wouldn't happen to be Portugese, would he? Calling someone "XXXxxx one" seems to be a cultural thing there, I spoke about it with Portugese guy a few weeks ago, hence why Jose Mourinhio calls himself "The Special One".
I'd just tell him politely but firmly, "er, I really appreciate the compliment but 'my pretty one' doesn't sound right, how about something else?". I'm laughing at Noodle though, I have an FB friend who jokingly calls her surname Pot-Noodle (she's double-barrelled) and her cover pic at one point was a Chinese Takeaway called "Noodle Love" :D:D:D
And "Dead Gran Guy" - let's not even go there!!!! Ha! So she's still very much dead then I take it, and legitimately so? Always worth checkin'
Nope I believe he is English, so even more stranger!
I'm just hoping he's not like this in real life, that just too creepy don't you think?
"Noodle" may be funny but it is the exact translation of my first name!! My parents had a wicked sense of humour..... :rolleyes:
Still not entirely sure, he's not mentioned it since but he can't have been that distraught seeing as he was online in POF the entire week she was supposed to have died and been buried......although saying that it could have been his way of coping :eek:
Nope I believe he is English, so even more stranger!
I'm just hoping he's not like this in real life, that just too creepy don't you think?
"Noodle" may be funny but it is the exact translation of my first name!! My parents had a wicked sense of humour..... :rolleyes:
Still not entirely sure, he's not mentioned it since but he can't have been that distraught seeing as he was online in POF the entire week she was supposed to have died and been buried......although saying that it could have been his way of coping :eek:
Ha, you must be so grateful to your parents!
I have to defend him on the POF thing. If you haven't met, then I think it's fair game that you keep your options open, so while I am only human and I sometimes feel "wounded" if I see my beau on POF, you have to think "well, we've not met yet". However if you meet and decide to go exclusive or similar, then it's not on alright. But yes, not sure about that as a bereavement coping strategy
I have to defend him on the POF thing. If you haven't met, then I think it's fair game that you keep your options open, so while I am only human and I sometimes feel "wounded" if I see my beau on POF, you have to think "well, we've not met yet". However if you meet and decide to go exclusive or similar, then it's not on alright. But yes, not sure about that as a bereavement coping strategy
Oh no dont get me wrong, I'm not saying its a problem that he's online probably chatting with other girls, hell I'm still chatting with other guys.
I just thought it was strange he was doing when he was supposed to be burying his dead gran!
Oh no dont get me wrong, I'm not saying its a problem that he's online probably chatting with other girls, hell I'm still chatting with other guys.
I just thought it was strange he was doing when he was supposed to be burying his dead gran!
Hehe, yeah, I'd agree. I've had the old "sex is an antidote to death" excuse cited at me before :rolleyes:
Christ, I think I've been outed!!!! :eek::eek::eek::o This could have easily been written by me! Sorry for the Daily Heil link, but hey ho.... alas I've received pitifully few of the "just right" messages though
Hehe, yeah, I'd agree. I've had the old "sex is an antidote to death" excuse cited at me before :rolleyes:
Christ, I think I've been outed!!!! :eek::eek::eek::o This could have easily been written by me! Sorry for the Daily Heil link, but hey ho.... alas I've received pitifully few of the "just right" messages though
I am currently sick of the entire thing, i've been dipping in and out of various sites over the years now and wonder if I have now been on ok cupid too long.
I message people and rarely do they see the message - I get messages from people that I am clearly not matched with at all. My profile says what I like, what I enjoy doing etc and I get messages from people who clearly aren't into anything like the same stuff as me or are old, obese, or have no teeth.
I've had friends vet my profile who say its good and I am not an unattractive person - I just want someone who isn't a total nutjob to contact me, this seems to be too much to ask.
I've recently come out of a bit of a head screwy situation regarding a man so am now really looking to date and find someone who is 'normal,', has good taste in music, likes to do stuff and isn't an eternal teenager. This seems to be hard to find.
I am currently sick of the entire thing, i've been dipping in and out of various sites over the years now and wonder if I have now been on ok cupid too long.
I message people and rarely do they see the message - I get messages from people that I am clearly not matched with at all. My profile says what I like, what I enjoy doing etc and I get messages from people who clearly aren't into anything like the same stuff as me or are old, obese, or have no teeth.
I've had friends vet my profile who say its good and I am not an unattractive person - I just want someone who isn't a total nutjob to contact me, this seems to be too much to ask.
I've recently come out of a bit of a head screwy situation regarding a man so am now really looking to date and find someone who is 'normal,', has good taste in music, likes to do stuff and isn't an eternal teenager. This seems to be hard to find.
Oh, Mookle, welcome. Soooooooo many of us on the thread (myself included) are in the exact same situation as you.
What site are you using, may I ask? I've had an identical experience on OK Cupid but one person's trash is another's treasure as it were, it's been perfectly fine for others.
Also, how clear is your head of the ex? Just sometimes if you're not entirely over them , or if you're still harbouring negative thoughts it may not seem obvious to you but it could show up subtly on your profile to someone you're after but has had a bad experience in some way.
I hope things improve soon. I've found that sites like Guardian Soulmates, My Single Friend etc. are far better in London too, so it's a shame you're having such bad luck.
Edit - would help if I read properly, stupid wine-addled brayne. OK Cupid, eh? Well I've had identical experiences to you on it, alas. I use POF which at least gives me decent results and dates once in a while. It's not perfect but I think everyone gravitates to it in the end. And it's free!
Oh no, it's not an ex as such. Too much to go into on here and I am not going to pretend that what happened hasn't hurt me etc - but my profile doesn't reflect anything to do with that aspect of my life. I know what you mean about the negativity showing up but it really doesn't. I am not a negative person in general but lately i've found myself becoming it a little.
I met three men very recently, one guy was extremely intense and is a trader. I met him out and he text me wanting to meet up - he would text me stuff like 'are you horny? I am horny when I think of you' - which is just cringy when you don't know someone... He also turned out to be a homophobe so that was a complete non starter.
Then there was a 23 year old who was quite pushy and clearly just wanted to have sex, as most 23 year old blokes do I suppose - so again, that's a nah.
Then there is someone else who I like, but he's a lot older - and rarely contacts me to meet up. I've done quite well on the 'moving on from the situation' front, it's given me a good boost to have this interest but then when none of it actually goes anywhere or they just aren't suitable then it can get a bit depressing.
I've found POF to be worse than OK cupid - how do you handle it? I get quite a lot of likes but not many messages! I find it quite hard to navigate so haven't concerned myself with it too much.
Oh no, it's not an ex as such. Too much to go into on here and I am not going to pretend that what happened hasn't hurt me etc - but my profile doesn't reflect anything to do with that aspect of my life. I know what you mean about the negativity showing up but it really doesn't. I am not a negative person in general but lately i've found myself becoming it a little.
I met three men very recently, one guy was extremely intense and is a trader. I met him out and he text me wanting to meet up - he would text me stuff like 'are you horny? I am horny when I think of you' - which is just cringy when you don't know someone... He also turned out to be a homophobe so that was a complete non starter.
Then there was a 23 year old who was quite pushy and clearly just wanted to have sex, as most 23 year old blokes do I suppose - so again, that's a nah.
Then there is someone else who I like, but he's a lot older - and rarely contacts me to meet up. I've done quite well on the 'moving on from the situation' front, it's given me a good boost to have this interest but then when none of it actually goes anywhere or they just aren't suitable then it can get a bit depressing.
I've found POF to be worse than OK cupid - how do you handle it? I get quite a lot of likes but not many messages! I find it quite hard to navigate so haven't concerned myself with it too much.
Its a two way streak, you can send messages too!
The one guy I did end up dating for a while last year, it was me who messaged him first.
Oh god, those stupid likes! Why can't folk just possess the relevant social skills and just message you rather than like you, favourite you or do the "meet me" thing? Aaargh, it's so annoying! Mind you I'm grateful they just do that rather than message me in some cases as they're so hideous! I just get depressed when I get notified of a new message and I can instantly tell they're nuts. And get it sadly confirmed when I open up either a rambling message, a badly spelt message calling me "hun" (please don't call me that if you don't know me), or an invitation to play with their c*ck
It's just a case of developing a very, very thick skin and wading through the numbers, alas. In the hope that you'll find a diamond in the dirt. I just find I'm the one who has to pursue to be honest, alas you can't account for the gentlemen of the parish having good enough taste to choose you, can you?
Sorry to hear about your experience, only asking as I've been there myself and sometimes it's easy for negative things to creep in. Only the other day I got a message from someone who in his message said "he was sick of girls lying to and cheating on him". Now sorry, love, but that is not good opening message material.......
Ah yes, I do that on OK Cupid but find POF a bit of a mission to go through! Maybe I need to learn how to filter people down a bit and I might not find it quite so daunting.
Ah yes, I do that on OK Cupid but find POF a bit of a mission to go through! Maybe I need to learn how to filter people down a bit and I might not find it quite so daunting.
Oh yes! And just to echo Wench, percentage of dates I've been on where I instigated the contact - 99.5%
Dates where they have instigated the contact - at best 0.5%
Seek and ye shall find! Some of the guys even said to me "I didn't message you as I thought you wouldn't go near me"!
Comments
Anyway I see scanning through that Plenty of Fish has a fair few mentions. I wonder if this would be a good place to begin, more so with it being free.
It's a shame you can't tour this sites a little without signing in.
Well I guess you can always tour, and switch your profile off from being searched so that you don't get scared off. You can put up a blank profile too at first if you just want to lurk but it could prove tricky then when you see someone you like. Try that for a week or two and see how you feel
Thanks. I take it with the paid sites you can sign up for free and create a profile but not do more than that until you subscribe. I think if I go down that route I'll try Zoosk first, it seems to be popular at the moment according to some online reviews.
Ah, I hadn't thought about the block option, I guess I need to utilize that a bit more. I only reserved that for the really special ones
It is a wonder sometimes what goes through their minds with some of the opening lines i've had......
Anyway, on a much happier note, I have a date on Sunday :cool::rolleyes::yawn:
My dates with the osteopath came to nothing.
So come on, all! What's your news?!
Was thinking about you the other day my sweet! Not in that way, well, at least that's what I'll reveal here
Sorry to hear about the osteopath but you can't force the old square peg into a round hole. If it ain't there.......
Anyone else on the horizon? How's the 30Dates stuff going?
HAHAHAHA!
It's going OK! Am doing another submission this week so keep an eye out. I've been permabusy for the past few weeks so have barely been able to do much, but I'm going to get my teeth into it now a lot more. Might as well; it's not like I'm getting any action anywhere else!!
What's your date, then? Who with?? Excite!!
Oh, and I'm off next week. And turn another year older, but I'm embracing that, as I've heard some very sad, tragic news amongst various folks I know over the last week so well done me for reaching another birthday. Even if it is an "old" one
Conversing with a guy at the moment *
But he keeps calling me "my pretty one" or "my chicken noodle" (noodle being my nickname) even though he knows my first name.
He seems a nice enough guy but eveytime he calls me "my pretty one" it makes me cringe so much, I get this vision of golum and the ring saying "my precious" over and over!!
I'm meeting him next wednesday so I really hope he doesn't say that to my face...... or am I being an unromantic ballbreaker?
* Miss PG - this is dead gran guy, and although I may have secretly nicknamed him I certainly wouldn't actually call him that!
Happy Birthday, hope you have a fabulous week off
Thanks for the b-day wishes Wench
He wouldn't happen to be Portugese, would he? Calling someone "XXXxxx one" seems to be a cultural thing there, I spoke about it with Portugese guy a few weeks ago, hence why Jose Mourinhio calls himself "The Special One".
I'd just tell him politely but firmly, "er, I really appreciate the compliment but 'my pretty one' doesn't sound right, how about something else?". I'm laughing at Noodle though, I have an FB friend who jokingly calls her surname Pot-Noodle (she's double-barrelled) and her cover pic at one point was a Chinese Takeaway called "Noodle Love"
And "Dead Gran Guy" - let's not even go there!!!! Ha! So she's still very much dead then I take it, and legitimately so? Always worth checkin'
Nope I believe he is English, so even more stranger!
I'm just hoping he's not like this in real life, that just too creepy don't you think?
"Noodle" may be funny but it is the exact translation of my first name!! My parents had a wicked sense of humour..... :rolleyes:
Still not entirely sure, he's not mentioned it since but he can't have been that distraught seeing as he was online in POF the entire week she was supposed to have died and been buried......although saying that it could have been his way of coping :eek:
Ha, you must be so grateful to your parents!
I have to defend him on the POF thing. If you haven't met, then I think it's fair game that you keep your options open, so while I am only human and I sometimes feel "wounded"
Oh no dont get me wrong, I'm not saying its a problem that he's online probably chatting with other girls, hell I'm still chatting with other guys.
I just thought it was strange he was doing when he was supposed to be burying his dead gran!
Hehe, yeah, I'd agree. I've had the old "sex is an antidote to death" excuse cited at me before :rolleyes:
Christ, I think I've been outed!!!! :eek::eek::eek::o This could have easily been written by me! Sorry for the Daily Heil link, but hey ho.... alas I've received pitifully few of the "just right" messages though
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2507261/Online-Dating-Diaries-Illiterate-stupid-downright-filthy-ARE-men-awful-online-dating-openers.html
That is just brilliant, she has accurately described each of the types and I recognise all of them.... or rather I have had messages from all of them!
There is one more type though..... the no clues type. They have no picture, 2 line profile and one word email opener.
I don't get the persistent ones because of my ruthless delete'n'block policy
Anymore! But heavens above, when I did, talk about insecurity. You don't respond to 'em within 5 mins and all hell breaks loose!
I message people and rarely do they see the message - I get messages from people that I am clearly not matched with at all. My profile says what I like, what I enjoy doing etc and I get messages from people who clearly aren't into anything like the same stuff as me or are old, obese, or have no teeth.
I've had friends vet my profile who say its good and I am not an unattractive person - I just want someone who isn't a total nutjob to contact me, this seems to be too much to ask.
I've recently come out of a bit of a head screwy situation regarding a man so am now really looking to date and find someone who is 'normal,', has good taste in music, likes to do stuff and isn't an eternal teenager. This seems to be hard to find.
Oh, Mookle, welcome. Soooooooo many of us on the thread (myself included) are in the exact same situation as you.
What site are you using, may I ask? I've had an identical experience on OK Cupid but one person's trash is another's treasure as it were, it's been perfectly fine for others.
Also, how clear is your head of the ex? Just sometimes if you're not entirely over them , or if you're still harbouring negative thoughts it may not seem obvious to you but it could show up subtly on your profile to someone you're after but has had a bad experience in some way.
I hope things improve soon. I've found that sites like Guardian Soulmates, My Single Friend etc. are far better in London too, so it's a shame you're having such bad luck.
Edit - would help if I read properly, stupid wine-addled brayne. OK Cupid, eh? Well I've had identical experiences to you on it, alas. I use POF which at least gives me decent results and dates once in a while. It's not perfect but I think everyone gravitates to it in the end. And it's free!
I met three men very recently, one guy was extremely intense and is a trader. I met him out and he text me wanting to meet up - he would text me stuff like 'are you horny? I am horny when I think of you' - which is just cringy when you don't know someone... He also turned out to be a homophobe so that was a complete non starter.
Then there was a 23 year old who was quite pushy and clearly just wanted to have sex, as most 23 year old blokes do I suppose - so again, that's a nah.
Then there is someone else who I like, but he's a lot older - and rarely contacts me to meet up. I've done quite well on the 'moving on from the situation' front, it's given me a good boost to have this interest but then when none of it actually goes anywhere or they just aren't suitable then it can get a bit depressing.
I've found POF to be worse than OK cupid - how do you handle it? I get quite a lot of likes but not many messages! I find it quite hard to navigate so haven't concerned myself with it too much.
Its a two way streak, you can send messages too!
The one guy I did end up dating for a while last year, it was me who messaged him first.
It's just a case of developing a very, very thick skin and wading through the numbers, alas. In the hope that you'll find a diamond in the dirt. I just find I'm the one who has to pursue to be honest, alas you can't account for the gentlemen of the parish having good enough taste to choose you, can you?
Sorry to hear about your experience, only asking as I've been there myself and sometimes it's easy for negative things to creep in. Only the other day I got a message from someone who in his message said "he was sick of girls lying to and cheating on him". Now sorry, love, but that is not good opening message material.......
Oh yes! And just to echo Wench, percentage of dates I've been on where I instigated the contact - 99.5%
Dates where they have instigated the contact - at best 0.5%
Seek and ye shall find! Some of the guys even said to me "I didn't message you as I thought you wouldn't go near me"!