By what age do you think adults should leave home?

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,274
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    That is just simply a ridiculous statement ,All mine were hear for different reasons after the age of 25 ,They all had " healthy " reasons and its really judgmental to presume everyones life is the same
    I cant get over this thread and peoples attitudes to what other people do with their lives .

    I wonder how many people move reluctantly out of the family home when both they and their parents would be very happy to remain under the same roof, simply because of negative attitudes from other people.
    Years ago it wouldn't have been unusual for aunts and uncles or MILs or whatever to all share a house. I'm sure it had lots of disadvantages but it also had lots of advantages - lots of people to help with the children, companionship for elderly people, kids getting to know their grandparents really well.
  • ĐironaĐirona Posts: 15,881
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    Xela M wrote: »
    18.

    My husband and his brothers think it's normal for men and their families to live all together with their parents in one big hosue :eek: trust me - it does not work!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    lol, i wonder why:D
  • Abbasolutely 40Abbasolutely 40 Posts: 15,589
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    I wonder how many people move reluctantly out of the family home when both they and their parents would be very happy to remain under the same roof, simply because of negative attitudes from other people.
    Years ago it wouldn't have been unusual for aunts and uncles or MILs or whatever to all share a house. I'm sure it had lots of disadvantages but it also had lots of advantages - lots of people to help with the children, companionship for elderly people, kids getting to know their grandparents really well.

    I agree , My own daughter is in Australia now for a year , she will be returning to live with us and I look forward to her being here .Her room is always ready and there for her .

    I know I shouldnt get annoyed but this judgmental attitude about who should live where and how many showers one has a week and how often you wash your sheets really gets right on my t!ts on DS .
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,274
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    I agree , My own daughter is in Australia now for a year , she will be returning to live with us and I look forward to her being here .Her room is always ready and there for her .

    I know I shouldnt get annoyed but this judgmental attitude about who should live where and how many showers one has a week and how often you wash your sheets really gets right on my t!ts on DS .

    I know I could move home in the morning and my parents would be happy for me to be there. They wouldn't think I was 'weird'. While I enjoy having my own place I do think this attitude of 'having' to move out at a certain age is creating a lot of lonliness for people who don't like living alone. If people still want to live with their parents or move the family in with their widowed MIL or whatever, and it suits all parties I don't see the problem.
  • SoundboxSoundbox Posts: 6,241
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    I left home at 21 but my ex is 31 and he still lives with his mum, and he is a complete mummy's boy! Pathetic really! :rolleyes:


    What actually is a 'mummys boy'? Is it someone who is close to and cares about their mother?
  • elliecatelliecat Posts: 9,890
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    I know I could move home in the morning and my parents would be happy for me to be there. They wouldn't think I was 'weird'. While I enjoy having my own place I do think this attitude of 'having' to move out at a certain age is creating a lot of lonliness for people who don't like living alone. If people still want to live with their parents or move the family in with their widowed MIL or whatever, and it suits all parties I don't see the problem.
    I agree , My own daughter is in Australia now for a year , she will be returning to live with us and I look forward to her being here .Her room is always ready and there for her .

    I know I shouldnt get annoyed but this judgmental attitude about who should live where and how many showers one has a week and how often you wash your sheets really gets right on my t!ts on DS .



    the other week we were painting our bathroom so couldn't use it whilst the paint was drying so I rang my parents to see if I could use their bathroom. My Mum's comment was 'you don't need to ask, it is still your home you are free to come and use whatever you want, come pick flowers and veg from the garden whenever you like'. I moved out two years ago but they have said there is always a bed there for us if we ever need it. granted my room is now used as a storage room so I wouldn't be able to get in there anyway.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,274
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    I think a lot of television programmes portray adults still living at home as pathetic saddos, still asking their mum what's for dinner. Most adults I know of still living at home are actually a huge support to their parents, doing lots of heavy work and repairs around the house, contributing financially and providing companionship, lifts and so on to elderly widowed mothers.
  • Abbasolutely 40Abbasolutely 40 Posts: 15,589
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    elliecat wrote: »
    the other week we were painting our bathroom so couldn't use it whilst the paint was drying so I rang my parents to see if I could use their bathroom. My Mum's comment was 'you don't need to ask, it is still your home you are free to come and use whatever you want, come pick flowers and veg from the garden whenever you like'. I moved out two years ago but they have said there is always a bed there for us if we ever need it. granted my room is now used as a storage room so I wouldn't be able to get in there anyway.

    Absolutely my attitude too .This is my grown up kids home , they are welcome anytime and they know it . I too use my sons room as a storage but if he needed it again and I would clear it .

    I think this attitude on DS of degrading another persons choice to make you feel better about your own is laughable. Both have their pros and cons. It's simple
  • RAINBOWGIRL22RAINBOWGIRL22 Posts: 24,459
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    I left home aged 25, then moved back aged 27 :o (I swiftly moved back out again though)

    OH lived with his parents until he was 27 also!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,282
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    I would say one year after working as full-time will be appropriate.
  • belfastkidbelfastkid Posts: 2,911
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    I think 23 is a good age to leave home.

    How exactly can you have a good time, be out and bring a girl home and start banging her with your parents snoring in the next room? :D
  • cookie_princesscookie_princess Posts: 1,601
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    Soundbox wrote: »
    What actually is a 'mummys boy'? Is it someone who is close to and cares about their mother?

    A man who is still very dependent on his mother is a mummy's boy :D
  • cheesy_pastycheesy_pasty Posts: 4,302
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    I left home at 17.
  • jp761jp761 Posts: 33,417
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    I guess everyone is not including people , who may have some kind of physical or mental problem which means they would have severe difficulty living alone.

    But for those who havent got any disability issue going on , i'd say aslong as all parties are happy who really cares. But i do think it's worse to leave home to early an then end up going back. Imo it's better to be as near as you can be to 100% certain , that you will never need to move back home again.
  • jp761jp761 Posts: 33,417
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    A man who is still very dependent on his mother is a mummy's boy :D
    Ahh but what about those who have left home , but take their washing home for mummy to do. :D
  • tghe-retfordtghe-retford Posts: 26,449
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    That sounds awful. Why did your parents do that?
    Sorry I couldn't reply earlier, had to go to work.

    My Mum was also homeless, she was lodging with another woman. My Dad sided with his (now ex) girlfriend in asking me to leave - I never got on with her, we had a personality clash. One of my sisters could only keep me there for a very short time and my other sister didn't want me living with her, and with no-one else to turn to, I had no choice but to go to the homeless charity here for help.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 59
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    If someone has already said something along the lines of this, then I do apologise, however going by the current economic climate.

    I would say by the end of their 20's if their financially sound to do so, if they are not; then it's no body's business when they do, the ex owner of my flat before I bought it, was going to move back to his parents, as their house is allot bigger.

    Plus they where about to have their first kid, but luckily a house came up they could afford to pay for and they took that.

    I am now just at the end of my 20's and love my flat, love being finally independent.
  • CrazyLoopCrazyLoop Posts: 31,148
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    My Dad didn't leave home til he was 26!!!

    I'm 21 & still living at home. But I was going to be moving out a couple years ago but that fell through so didn't happen -.- Was also planning to move out next Summer (at the earliest) with someone but think that's going to wait a long while again.

    One of my sisters moved out when she was 18 and then moved back in a few years later for 3 years or so. She's moved out again, but completely on her own since & lives nearer to us this time :D
  • soulboy77soulboy77 Posts: 24,396
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    I know someone who moved out and now his mum pops round his flat to do the washing, ironing and cleaning for him.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 14,284
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    Absolutely my attitude too .This is my grown up kids home , they are welcome anytime and they know it . I too use my sons room as a storage but if he needed it again and I would clear it .

    I think this attitude on DS of degrading another persons choice to make you feel better about your own is laughable. Both have their pros and cons. It's simple

    I've lived in the UK for nine years and if I wanted to return to the USA with my kids and husband in tow, my parents would have us in a heartbeat. My mother says as long as she has a home, we have a home.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 367
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    It depends on the situation. For example, if someone moved out, and, through no fault of their own had to move back in with their folks, I don't see the problem. However, if it's just someone who's never managed to sort their shit out and is still living with their folks for no reason other than familiarity/convenience, I'd be worried. Basically, in my opinion, if you're still living at home (with no good excuse) after the age of 25, that counts as "a bit weird". I know a woman in her early 30s who still lives at home, but constantly witters on about fairytales and princesses and wishing on a star and the like; I get the feeling that she mostly acts like a child to justify (to herself) still living with her folks and refusing to get a "normal" job because they might ask her to take her lip piercing out. I also know (and once dated) a chap who is 35 and still lives with his parents because he's determined that he's going to be a director and screenwriter (his reasoning? "I really like films"- overlooking the fact that he can barely string a sentence together).
    Basically, I don't know anyone over the age of 25 who still lives with their parents for a healthy reason.

    Are you for real? what is a bit weird is your attitude.

    Ever heard of carers?,disabled adults who need constant care from adult parents, kids who care for elderly parents ect,i guess not because your appear to live in a bubble.

    You need to do some growing up.
  • malpascmalpasc Posts: 9,626
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    I left home at 16 and am now almost 33. Except for a month when I was about 22 and between houses I have never been back.

    I must admit I find it odd when people in their 20s and 30s still live at home. I'd never tell them that and I don't judge them on it but do wonder why some people don't want to strike out on their own. I couldn't wait, hence I left home pretty early!
  • LostFoolLostFool Posts: 90,623
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    soulboy77 wrote: »
    I know someone who moved out and now his mum pops round his flat to do the washing, ironing and cleaning for him.

    I have a friend who lives next door to his parents. While he is at work his mum comes around to do the cleaning, washing and ironing and she leaves his dinner in the microwave ready for him to come home. She does everything apart from wipe his @rse and tuck him into bed at night.

    He's 40.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 698
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    That is just simply a ridiculous statement ,All mine were hear for different reasons after the age of 25 ,They all had " healthy " reasons and its really judgmental to presume everyones life is the same
    I cant get over this thread and peoples attitudes to what other people do with their lives .
    see3po wrote: »
    Are you for real? what is a bit weird is your attitude.

    Ever heard of carers?,disabled adults who need constant care from adult parents, kids who care for elderly parents ect,i guess not because your appear to live in a bubble.

    You need to do some growing up.
    Did either of you guys actually read my post? No? Thought not. I said no GOOD reason. Caring counts as a good reason. Financial troubles forcing you to move back in counts as a good reason. Illness/health conditions, breakups, genuinely being unable to afford to move out due to lack of funds, etc, all good reasons.
    Merely being lazy/refusing to grow up = not a good reason. Unless you think that pretending to be a teenager when well into your thirties is a good reason to still live at home and not even attempt to be independent.
    But hey, don't let it stop you from making assumptions about how I "live in a bubble" or "need to grow up". Arguably, you guys are the ones making judgements, except you didn't even bother reading my post properly before doing so.
  • Abbasolutely 40Abbasolutely 40 Posts: 15,589
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    Did either of you guys actually read my post? No? Thought not. I said no GOOD reason. Caring counts as a good reason. Financial troubles forcing you to move back in counts as a good reason. Illness/health conditions, breakups, genuinely being unable to afford to move out due to lack of funds, etc, all good reasons.
    Merely being lazy/refusing to grow up = not a good reason. Unless you think that pretending to be a teenager when well into your thirties is a good reason to still live at home and not even attempt to be independent.
    But hey, don't let it stop you from making assumptions about how I "live in a bubble" or "need to grow up". Arguably, you guys are the ones making judgements, except you didn't even bother reading my post properly before doing so.


    As a matter of fact this is what you said
    "if you're still living at home (with no good excuse) after the age of 25, that counts as "a bit weird".""



    I still maintain its a ridiculous statement as mine didnt need an excuse to stay here, we all liked it so and you need to realize that what people do with their lives is not weird simply because you wouldnt do it
    Many people live at home and are a family and enjoy it ,
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