Urgent cat's advice needed!

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 02:45

Hi all,

I am sorry this will probably be a long message, but I truly need a constructive advice. Please help me.

Last night when coming home from work, a neighbour was standing on the one of the entrances of the block of flats where I live. I have seen her before and I know that she has two small (few months old) kittens. I see them on her bay window all the time. They seem to be indoor cats.I have two furboys myself and recently took in a female stray, that no charity wanted to help me with.We had few conversations regarding the cats, but nothing more. She seemed a little bit strange. So last night, when she saw me, she just shoved her flat keys in my hand, telling me that she was knocking on my door earlier with a favour to ask. She told me that her husband just passed away couple of weeks back and she needed to go to her cousin for the night, and if I could feed her cats in the morning. I didn't know what to do, but felt sorry for the cats. I asked her to show me into the flat and tell me where the food, litter etc is. I knew that if I didn't agree, she would leave them alone anyway. She had left plenty of food and water for the cats, and the tv was on. The tray looked a mess. So after re-assuring me that she will be back tonight,and after I insisted on taking her phone number and giving her mine, I took the keys. I went in the morning and feed the cats, changed their water and litter, and brought them some toys to play with. I noticed that one of the cats(beautiful white with spots) had scabs all over her back and around the neck.Some missing fur too. The other one was very scared and wouldn't let me approach her. I left them with the tv on. Tonight after work, I went back and did the round again. Just want to mention that the flat is a tip. It's a studio flat and everything is all over the place. So after she didn't call me to collect her keys by 8pm, I tried to call her mobile few times and it went to answering machine. I left her a voicemail to call me back. She did after an hour and said there was something wrong with her phone and she will be back home tomorrow afternoon... and the line went dead. I tried to call her back to no avail. So my question is: 'What do I do if she doesn't come back tomorrow either???' These poor kittens are on their own for 2 days. Although I go there and try to spend few minutes with them, they don't know me, and surely one of the cats needs to be seen by a vet. I am working tomorrow till 5pm, and if she doesn't come back by then, what do I do? And even when she comes back - what do I do? Please give me some advice, I am so upset and I can't stop thinking about these poor kittens...

daisydee · 16/02/14 - 04:10

So far, 56 people have read this post - and no one has come up with any advice - including me

I have already read it and came back to see if anyone had come up with any advice. It's a sad and all to common problem, my sister has cats coming into her garden, who she thinks are all from the same home, who are skinny, starving hungy and seemingly neglected. It is very distressing for her, being a cat lover. I have given some thought to the problem with the 2 kittens, and if it was me in that situation, I would look after the kittens for as long as it takes, and when the owner returns, make her aware of the duty of care she has to show towards the kittens. It sounds to me as though one of them has an allergy to flea bites. I would also be interested in knowing why she took the kittens on in the first place.

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 04:18

daisydee wrote: »

So far, 56 people have read this post - and no one has come up with any advice - including me I have already read it and came back to see if anyone had come up with any advice. It's a sad and all to common problem, my sister has cats coming into her garden, who she thinks are all from the same home, who are skinny, starving hungy and seemingly neglected. It is very distressing for her, being a cat lover. I have given some thought to the problem with the 2 kittens, and if it was me in that situation, I would look after the kittens for as long as it takes, and when the owner returns, make her aware of the duty of care she has to show towards the kittens. It sounds to me as though one of them has an allergy to flea bites. I would also be interested in knowing why she took the kittens on in the first place.

Thank you for replying daseydee, I also was waiting with anticipation, and seeing how many people read it and had no reply

. I just came back from the flat with the kittens to make sure they are OK. The one with the problem does seem to scratch itself alot. The other one seem healthier. The problem is that the lady seems to be either very distressed or with some kind of a problem. She did tell me that she suffers with epilepsy. When I first met her, I thought she had a drinking problem,and on the night she gave me the keys, she seemed out of it, but I couldn't smell any alcohol, so I can't really say what the problem is. I will keep looking after the cats, but I do feel sorry for them, they do deserve better life

I just don't know what is the right thing to do... The fact that they don't have any access to outside makes the situation even worse...

MarellaK · 16/02/14 - 04:29

If I have read the original post correctly, I understand that this poor lady has just lost her husband? - this is a terrible time for her and I'm sure she has a lot of sorting out to do. She's only been gone one (?) extra night and she did respond to your call so it doesn't seem like she's planning to abandon her home and cats. Perhaps she just needs someone to help and support her in her time of crisis, not criticise and condemn her. Her flat may be in a mess because she's been concentrating on other priorities and I'm sure it must be difficult to keep a studio flat tidy anyway.

If I was in the same situation I would, for the moment, carry on feeding her cats and calling in when I could before and after work.

If you don't hear from her, she doesn't answer her calls and she hasn't returned in a couple more days perhaps then it would be sensible to contact the RSPCA for advice.

When she returns you could mention the scabs on the cat's back. It is likely she is not up to date with the flea treatments, it may be that she hasn't even noticed or, if she has, she hasn't had time to get the cat to a vet. One of my 3 cats sometimes gets scabs when she's stressed due to over-grooming but she's perfectly healthy in every way, never had fleas. I delayed her last vet visit for a couple of weeks hoping they would clear up themselves while I tried to understand what was stressing her. I'm sure this lady's household has been in considerable stress in recent weeks if her husband was ill before he died......

I would advise giving this lady a little more time and try to understand what she may be going through at the moment.

Mrs F · 16/02/14 - 04:33

sorry have you tried cats protection league or rspca?

Also sometimes there are "kind" vets who will take them in, give a medical check up, and then give the cat to a charity.

Your neighbour, has obviously got some life problems, she must have been feeling pretty desperate to just leave

topcat2 · 16/02/14 - 04:34

I would ring the vet and see if they say that the cat needs to go in or not. Don't judge her on the state of her home she's going through a really rough time.

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 04:39

MarellaK wrote: »

If I have read the original post correctly, I understand that this poor lady has just lost her husband? - this is a terrible time for her and I'm sure she has a lot of sorting out to do. She's only been gone one (?) extra night and she did respond to your call so it doesn't seem like she's planning to abandon her home and cats. Perhaps she just needs someone to help and support her in her time of crisis, not criticise and condemn her. Her flat may be in a mess because she's been concentrating on other priorities and I'm sure it must be difficult to keep a studio flat tidy anyway.

If I was in the same situation I would, for the moment, carry on feeding her cats and calling in when I could before and after work.

If you don't hear from her, she doesn't answer her calls and she hasn't returned in a couple more days perhaps then it would be sensible to contact the RSPCA for advice.

When she returns you could mention the scabs on the cat's back. It is likely she is not up to date with the flea treatments, it may be that she hasn't even noticed or, if she has, she hasn't had time to get the cat to a vet. One of my 3 cats sometimes gets scabs when she's stressed due to over-grooming but she's perfectly healthy in every way, never had fleas. I delayed her last vet visit for a couple of weeks hoping they would clear up themselves while I tried to understand what was stressing her. I'm sure this lady's household has been in considerable stress in recent weeks if her husband was ill before he died......

I would advise giving this lady a little more time and try to understand what she may be going through at the moment.

Thank you, I didn't mean to criticize her, sorry if it sounded this way. I just don't know her, it was quite random though that she gave me the keys, while she was waiting for a cab to go to her cousin. If I didn't pass by, she probably would've left anyway. I do feel sorry for her, but I can't stop thinking of what is the best thing to do in this situation. I will definitely point it to her that she needs to take the cat to the vet. If she can't afford it, I will(not that I can afford it, but I will do it).The scabs are all over her back and the fur has fallen, so they are quite visible. Thank you for your advice. My cats had flees before, but I managed to clear them straight away. I will have a calm chat with her, when she comes back.

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 04:42

Mrs F wrote: »

sorry have you tried cats protection league or rspca?

Also sometimes there are "kind" vets who will take them in, give a medical check up, and then give the cat to a charity.

Your neighbour, has obviously got some life problems, she must have been feeling pretty desperate to just leave

When she told me that her husband passed away, I asked her if she would keep the cats and if she can look after them. She replied 'Yes, of course'. So I don't think it's my place to get involved at this point and get RSPCA involved. They didn't help me when I needed them with my stray anyway. I think I will just wait and see, she may be back tomorrow...

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 04:48

topcat2 wrote: »

Don't judge her on the state of her home she's going through a really rough time.

Sorry if it came across like that. I didn't mean to be judgmental of her home. Just there was cat poo all over the floor, it surely is not good for her health as well

topcat2 · 16/02/14 - 05:00

If you are feeding her cats how often are you cleaning her litter tray?

Just wondering as before I started using really good clumping cat litter unless I cleaned the tray at least twice a day my cat Boo in protest would poop right next to it. He's a little sod likes things done just so.

Now I use good litter it needs checking twice a day but most days I will only need to scoop once.

songbird0311 · 16/02/14 - 05:12

topcat2 wrote: »

If you are feeding her cats how often are you cleaning her litter tray?

Just wondering as before I started using really good clumping cat litter unless I cleaned the tray at least twice a day my cat Boo in protest would poop right next to it. He's a little sod likes things done just so.

Now I use good litter it needs checking twice a day but most days I will only need to scoop once.

When I went to feed them this morning, the litter tray was all stone clumped, so I cleaned the whole thing and laid fresh litter in it (cleaned around as well). I used the litter she had in a bag, clay gray tesco I think. Tonight when I went after work, I cleaned it up from the clumps and fluffed it up a bit. I use Cat's best for my cats, my Mr.Darcy(sad I know

) meows every time he does the job, so I can go and clean it straight away

, but probably she uses what she can afford for hers. I will talk to her,when she is back, and I will try and help her if she accepts my help. I order Cat's best from Zooplus 40l bag and it lasts me for 3+ months with 3 cats and 3 trays and it doesn't smell at all...at £25 it comes cheaper than buying anything else from the supermarkets...

MarellaK · 16/02/14 - 13:36

songbird0311 wrote: »

Thank you, I didn't mean to criticize her, sorry if it sounded this way. I just don't know her, it was quite random though that she gave me the keys, while she was waiting for a cab to go to her cousin. If I didn't pass by, she probably would've left anyway. I do feel sorry for her, but I can't stop thinking of what is the best thing to do in this situation. I will definitely point it to her that she needs to take the cat to the vet. If she can't afford it, I will(not that I can afford it, but I will do it).The scabs are all over her back and the fur has fallen, so they are quite visible. Thank you for your advice. My cats had flees before, but I managed to clear them straight away. I will have a calm chat with her, when she comes back.

She probably gave you the keys because she knew you had cats and so could be trusted with hers'. You said she left lots of food and water for the cats (even if the place was in a mess) and she originally intended to be just one night away. I have left my cats alone for a night on many occasions. Knowing you were able to check on her cats gave her the confidence to stay away longer.

I am trying to view the situation from her perspective, she obviously has a lot of issues. Grief affects us all in different ways but I do agree that she has acted a little irresponsibly with regards to the welfare of her cats. I don't normally ask my neighbours for any help but, if anything happened to my parents in Ireland, I would need to leave my home (in England) at very short notice and the family I would normally depend on to check on my cats would likely be going over to Ireland too. I could contact my professional cat sitter but she may not be available at short notice. In that situation I too may have to ask a neighbour to care for my cats but I would only ask a neighbour who I knew loved cats herself. I believe, at a time of intense grief, that my cats 'may' take on secondary importance - although I have often been accused by family members of thinking and caring more about my cats than about any of them

.

It is lovely that you are showing such concern for the cats and I'm sure the owner really appreciates what you are doing.

[Deleted User] · 16/02/14 - 23:45

I'd get the kittens to the vets regardless. Get them sorted and then see what help she needs after.

topcat2 · 17/02/14 - 01:58

Has she come back or have you heard from her yet? I can't stand cats best it tracks much too much for my liking. I use golden grey

songbird0311 · 17/02/14 - 02:13

topcat2 wrote: »

Has she come back or have you heard from her yet? I can't stand cats best it tracks much too much for my liking. I use golden grey

Yes, she is back. I went to see her and she is very distressed. She said she is epileptic and had a fit and injured her knee. We discussed the cats. They are 5 and 6 months old females - never been to the vet's. I politely told her that they need their jabs and one needs to be seen by a vet urgently and showed her the scabs, she told me that the cat has them, because they fight alot... I offered to take the cat to the vet's myself, but she said she will do it. I will wait a few days, and if she hasn't done so, then I will insist on taking her myself. I know what you mean about cat's best tracking, but after trying all sorts, it's the only one that doesn't smell if cleaned regularly and it last ages. I haven't tried Golden gray though, will give it a try if it will save me the hoovering

Uffa · 17/02/14 - 02:29

I just wanted to say what a really nice person you are. A lot of people would have just said no and walked away. This poor woman is obviously struggling with her grief and epilepsy. Can you not treat both the cats and the house for fleas? You could dress it up saying you had some spare Frontline or whatever in the house. I hope they are all ok. By the way my cat is a home cat and has never been innoculated. He is happy to stay inside and although gets plenty of opportunity to go outside absolutely refuses. He is a very healthy lad.

songbird0311 · 17/02/14 - 02:43

Uffa wrote: »

I just wanted to say what a really nice person you are. A lot of people would have just said no and walked away. This poor woman is obviously struggling with her grief and epilepsy. Can you not treat both the cats and the house for fleas? You could dress it up saying you had some spare Frontline or whatever in the house. I hope they are all ok. By the way my cat is a home cat and has never been innoculated. He is happy to stay inside and although gets plenty of opportunity to go outside absolutely refuses. He is a very healthy lad.

Thank you for your kind words. I am just trying to do right by her and by the cats. I did mention to her that the scabs may be a result of flee allergy as suggested by daisydee in her reply. The lady told me that she had treated them for flees and worms. I don't know how long ago that was, but will give it a couple of days and ask again. If she has done it recently, it may be wise to give it some time before treating them again. The flat is also very cluttered (not judging, just stating)so it will be very difficult to spray and disinfect it without being too intrusive or pushy.

I will also call my vet tomorrow to ask for his advice.

Uffa · 17/02/14 - 03:20

songbird0311 wrote: »

Thank you for your kind words. I am just trying to do right by her and by the cats. I did mention to her that the scabs may be a result of flee allergy as suggested by daisydee in her reply. The lady told me that she had treated them for flees and worms. I don't know how long ago that was, but will give it a couple of days and ask again. If she has done it recently, it may be wise to give it some time before treating them again. The flat is also very cluttered (not judging, just stating)so it will be very difficult to spray and disinfect it without being too intrusive or pushy. I will also call my vet tomorrow to ask for his advice.

Oh of course you mentioned that about her flat, sorry.

. Good luck. Please keep us up to date with how it all goes. It looks like you may now have this lady and her cats in your life.

queenshaks · 17/02/14 - 15:12

I wanted to add to this thread but didn't know what quite to say.

I think you're a star of a neighbour to do what you did, somebody else could have turned around and said no.

As for cat litter, if you want cheaper but decent litter, I get mine from Asda. The brand is Bob Martin Clumping litter, £6.48 for 20L.

Here's a link, I don't know if it'll work as I'm doing from my online shopping log in link

songbird0311 · 17/02/14 - 17:27

Thank you for the link, it did work. I will check it out. I will post if there are any updates about the cats. I tried to speak with my vet, but he was in surgery this morning. Will try again later today. Thank you all for your advice. Much appreciated.

topcat2 · 17/02/14 - 19:57

songbird0311 wrote: »

Yes, she is back. I went to see her and she is very distressed. She said she is epileptic and had a fit and injured her knee. We discussed the cats. They are 5 and 6 months old females - never been to the vet's. I politely told her that they need their jabs and one needs to be seen by a vet urgently and showed her the scabs, she told me that the cat has them, because they fight alot... I offered to take the cat to the vet's myself, but she said she will do it. I will wait a few days, and if she hasn't done so, then I will insist on taking her myself. I know what you mean about cat's best tracking, but after trying all sorts, it's the only one that doesn't smell if cleaned regularly and it last ages. I haven't tried Golden gray though, will give it a try if it will save me the hoovering

If you try golden grey get the unscented one in the blue bag. Scented cat litter is vile.

tim_smith · 17/02/14 - 20:56

If she has just lost her husband, then there is your answer. I lost mine ten days ago and I know I am still out of it, as you call it. Fortunately, my two dogs and three cats are not being neglected, they are keeping me sane.

She will have a lot to do, so just keep looking after her cats until she returns.

Uffa · 21/02/14 - 01:35

Hi Songbird sorry to bump your thread. I was wondering how things were going with your neighbour and her cats?

songbird0311 · 21/02/14 - 01:46

Uffa wrote: »

Hi Songbird sorry to bump your thread. I was wondering how things were going with your neighbour and her cats?

Hi Uffa. I went there on Tuesday to see how the kittens are. I asked her how she is and she said that she had alot of pain in her knee from the epileptic fall. It was a bit swollen. I asked her about taking the cat to the vet. She said that as soon as she feels better, she will take her. I offered again to take the kitten myself, but she declined, telling me that, because she is on benefits, it will be free of charge if she does it. So I don't think there is anything I can do about it at this time. Obviously she doesn't want me to interfere. Than last night, she knocked on my door again, giving me her keys, asking me to feed the cats in the morning, because she is in alot of pain and will call an ambulance to take her to the hospital and she is not sure what time she will be back. I took the keys, but then this morning she rang me early saying she was back. I went to see her(mostly the cats) again and the flat was warmer and they looked happier. But it seems the healthy kitten is on heat

So again I suggested that she should have them spayed, and I was told that she wants them to have at least one litter each and then have them done... It's a whole saga, I know. And I think you were right when you said that I probably will have them in my life now.

Uffa · 21/02/14 - 21:08

Hi thanks for coming back with your update. Poor woman sounds as if she is having an awful time just now, poor soul. Yes you are obviously going to be a surrogate aunt to the cats and a real friend (whether you want to be or not

) to this lady. All I can say is well done you. Too many people would just have walked away and left her to it. x

[Deleted User] · 21/02/14 - 22:16

So she can't afford to take the cats to the vets but she can afford the cost of two litters? Bloody selfish idiot.

Hey there!

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