I had the exact same problem - although it was some grumpy old woman complaining that my son was in the changing rooms. I wouldn't have minded but my son was only 6 at the time. I haven't been back to that swimming pool since.
My son is 10 now and we go swimming together and he changes in the mens on his own. We have no problems.
You said children were anxious about going into public places by themselves, I was pointing out they will stay anxious if you wrap them in cotton wool and stop them going into the said places.
But we're talking about the practicalities of what do with children in public places, when you or they need to change or use a public toilet.
There's absolutely no way I would let an 8 year old go and change on their own.
I don't understand the problem... I wouldn't complain about an 8 yr old boy in the changing rooms but then we have individual cubicles so he wouldn't see any more than he would in the pool!
There's absolutely no way I would let an 8 year old go and change on their own.
I don't understand the problem... I wouldn't complain about an 8 yr old boy in the changing rooms but then we have individual cubicles so he wouldn't see any more than he would in the pool!
The original example didn't have individual cubicles, so that's what the problem was.
Me either .. but then I'm over protecting my children!
What does your son think?
Different children, different rates of maturity.
Plus in my experience children are terrible prudes, male or female they all go through an age where somebody naked in the showers is yuck.
My advice would be to find a swimming pool with family changing areas or attend the one you are talking about either with a friend of his or when it isn't busy.
You could also put in a suggestion to the pool that they establish a family changing area.
But we're talking about the practicalities of what do with children in public places, when you or they need to change or use a public toilet.
No one has talked about keeping children at home.
I know. You were saying that is wasn't a paedophile problem but that children get nervous going into toilets/changing rooms by themselves. I was pointing out that unless they start doing things by themselves they will stay nervous.
I know. You were saying that is wasn't a paedophile problem but that children get nervous going into toilets by themselves. I was pointing out that unless they start doing things by themselves they will stay nervous.
What does your son think?
Different children, different rates of maturity.
Plus in my experience children are terrible prudes, male or female they all go through an age where somebody naked in the showers is yuck.
My advice would be to find a swimming pool with family changing areas or attend the one you are talking about either with a friend of his or when it isn't busy.
You could also put in a suggestion to the pool that they establish a family changing area.
I now go to a pool that has family changing with cubicles so it isn't a problem. My son has no problem with nudity at the moment... my daughter is 11 and she would have a problem but that is to be expected with her age
8 is far too young to be going into their own changing room, look at all of the peados around. I would of thought a swimming bath would be a prime target location for something like that.
You really need to get a life. It's very insulting to men to insinuate that they're virtually all paedophiles (note spelling), and simply not true. By the way, you forgot the gays - lots of them in swimming baths too, on the lookout. :rolleyes:
<Apologies for rolleyes, but I thought it was appropriate on this occasion>
:eek: do what!! I've never seen those jobs advertised
They're NOT CCTV monitored, certainly not the bits where people are changing! I know this because I was a local Councillor on the Leisure Committee when we were building a new leisure centre, and the discussion of where to put the CCTV caused endless problems, but we certainly didn't put it anywhere that CCTV operators could perv over it!
Op he is your son you know whats best for him, you know him and none of us in here do.
I personally do not think that there is anything wrong in taking him into change with you.
I always think it's better to be overprotective of your kids than not protective enough.
It's better to try and get the balance right. Over protected kids turn into precocious little wimps in my opinion. Seriously though, whats going to happen in a public place with loads of other people around?
It's better to try and get the balance right. Over protected kids turn into precocious little wimps in my opinion. Seriously though, whats going to happen in a public place with loads of other people around?
The place I used to go to often wasn't really busy... with just a handful of people in the changing rooms when I went in there.
Another spin on this is if you need the toilet and your child doesn't. Would you make them stand outside alone?
Surely you are not taking the child into the cubicle?
Like you say, it has a different spin on it, as the child doesn't see other people getting dressed or undressed, if he is waiting in the common area of ladies loos.
Surely you are not taking the child into the cubicle?
Like you say, it has a different spin on it, as the child doesn't see other people getting dressed or undressed, if he is waiting in the common area of ladies loos.
However what I cannot understand from reading the posts in the thread are the posters saying they would feel uncomfortable with an 8yr old boys in the same changing rooms - what is the boy actually going to do, what is he going to see, what is he going to be thinking?
Does it really matter? Its an 8 year old boy for goodness sake!
I think its more important to protect the children of the world than to worry about adults worrying about what some 8 yr old boy might be thinking, or seeing them!
My sister and her partner have twins, one each sex.
They used to take it in turns taking the twins swimming, and whoever took them would take them into the corresponding chainging room with them. (eg my sis would take them to the ladies, her partner the mens etc).
They did this until they were 13 and there were never any complaints.
This only stopped when my sis decided she didnt like swimming anymore and so they all stopped going.
So i have to say i dont think there is anything wrong with what the op does to her son.
My sister and her partner have twins, one each sex.
They used to take it in turns taking the twins swimming, and whoever took them would take them into the corresponding chainging room with them. (eg my sis would take them to the ladies, her partner the mens etc).
They did this until they were 13 and there were never any complaints.
This only stopped when my sis decided she didnt like swimming anymore and so they all stopped going.
So i have to say i dont think there is anything wrong with what the op does to her son.
I hope this helps
Good luck!
Taking 13 year old into the opposite sexes changing rooms is ridiculous. They're going through puberty for god sake.
However what I cannot understand from reading the posts in the thread are the posters saying they would feel uncomfortable with an 8yr old boys in the same changing rooms - what is the boy actually going to do, what is he going to see, what is he going to be thinking?
Does it really matter? Its an 8 year old boy for goodness sake!
I think its more important to protect the children of the world than to worry about adults worrying about what some 8 yr old boy might be thinking, or seeing them!
Cover your bits if your embarrased :rolleyes:
I agree. What does a grown woman embarrassed about an eight year old child tell us about that woman? Why is she so embarrassed? And what sort of message does that send to the child - that he should be embarrassed about naked bodies because adults are?
But, on the other hand, I'd let my eight year old go and get changed himself in the male changeing rooms, because I know that's what he'd want to do. It would make him feel independent and grown up. Indeed he walks to the public swimming pool with his older (age 10) brother and they go swimming by themselves.
My sister and her partner have twins, one each sex.
They used to take it in turns taking the twins swimming, and whoever took them would take them into the corresponding chainging room with them. (eg my sis would take them to the ladies, her partner the mens etc).
They did this until they were 13 and there were never any complaints.
This only stopped when my sis decided she didnt like swimming anymore and so they all stopped going.
So i have to say i dont think there is anything wrong with what the op does to her son.
I hope this helps
Good luck!
A thirteen year old boy was being taken into the female changing room with no cubicles, and he didn't complain!!! You bet he didn't complain! He must have thought all his Christmases had come at once. I bet he started complaining once they stopped going to the baths.
As has already been mentioned by umpteen people, at eight years old a child has reached the age where they start to notice the naked people around them, and really should be going into changing rooms with people of the same sex. By the age of thirteen no kid isn't going to have their eyes popping out on stalks surrounded by naked members of the opposite sex. And not just their eyes.
Just imagine how he must have felt when those two naked 16 year-old girls walked past him to the showers. That is way way too old to be going into the changing rooms with your mum.
I would take him in with me until he was about 10
and i wouldn't let them in men's loos either until they are older you just don't know in this day and age
Comments
My son is 10 now and we go swimming together and he changes in the mens on his own. We have no problems.
But we're talking about the practicalities of what do with children in public places, when you or they need to change or use a public toilet.
No one has talked about keeping children at home.
I don't understand the problem... I wouldn't complain about an 8 yr old boy in the changing rooms but then we have individual cubicles so he wouldn't see any more than he would in the pool!
The original example didn't have individual cubicles, so that's what the problem was.
What does your son think?
Different children, different rates of maturity.
Plus in my experience children are terrible prudes, male or female they all go through an age where somebody naked in the showers is yuck.
My advice would be to find a swimming pool with family changing areas or attend the one you are talking about either with a friend of his or when it isn't busy.
You could also put in a suggestion to the pool that they establish a family changing area.
I know. You were saying that is wasn't a paedophile problem but that children get nervous going into toilets/changing rooms by themselves. I was pointing out that unless they start doing things by themselves they will stay nervous.
I agree with you.
I now go to a pool that has family changing with cubicles so it isn't a problem. My son has no problem with nudity at the moment... my daughter is 11 and she would have a problem but that is to be expected with her age
You really need to get a life. It's very insulting to men to insinuate that they're virtually all paedophiles (note spelling), and simply not true. By the way, you forgot the gays - lots of them in swimming baths too, on the lookout. :rolleyes:
<Apologies for rolleyes, but I thought it was appropriate on this occasion>
They're NOT CCTV monitored, certainly not the bits where people are changing! I know this because I was a local Councillor on the Leisure Committee when we were building a new leisure centre, and the discussion of where to put the CCTV caused endless problems, but we certainly didn't put it anywhere that CCTV operators could perv over it!
I personally do not think that there is anything wrong in taking him into change with you.
I always think it's better to be overprotective of your kids than not protective enough.
Thanks redjay
It's better to try and get the balance right. Over protected kids turn into precocious little wimps in my opinion. Seriously though, whats going to happen in a public place with loads of other people around?
The place I used to go to often wasn't really busy... with just a handful of people in the changing rooms when I went in there.
Like you say, it has a different spin on it, as the child doesn't see other people getting dressed or undressed, if he is waiting in the common area of ladies loos.
and me with my daughter?
However what I cannot understand from reading the posts in the thread are the posters saying they would feel uncomfortable with an 8yr old boys in the same changing rooms - what is the boy actually going to do, what is he going to see, what is he going to be thinking?
Does it really matter? Its an 8 year old boy for goodness sake!
I think its more important to protect the children of the world than to worry about adults worrying about what some 8 yr old boy might be thinking, or seeing them!
Cover your bits if your embarrased :rolleyes:
I wouldn't take a girl of 8 into the gents toilets. But I don't know the alternative!
They used to take it in turns taking the twins swimming, and whoever took them would take them into the corresponding chainging room with them. (eg my sis would take them to the ladies, her partner the mens etc).
They did this until they were 13 and there were never any complaints.
This only stopped when my sis decided she didnt like swimming anymore and so they all stopped going.
So i have to say i dont think there is anything wrong with what the op does to her son.
I hope this helps
Good luck!
Taking 13 year old into the opposite sexes changing rooms is ridiculous. They're going through puberty for god sake.
I agree. What does a grown woman embarrassed about an eight year old child tell us about that woman? Why is she so embarrassed? And what sort of message does that send to the child - that he should be embarrassed about naked bodies because adults are?
But, on the other hand, I'd let my eight year old go and get changed himself in the male changeing rooms, because I know that's what he'd want to do. It would make him feel independent and grown up. Indeed he walks to the public swimming pool with his older (age 10) brother and they go swimming by themselves.
A thirteen year old boy was being taken into the female changing room with no cubicles, and he didn't complain!!! You bet he didn't complain! He must have thought all his Christmases had come at once. I bet he started complaining once they stopped going to the baths.
As has already been mentioned by umpteen people, at eight years old a child has reached the age where they start to notice the naked people around them, and really should be going into changing rooms with people of the same sex. By the age of thirteen no kid isn't going to have their eyes popping out on stalks surrounded by naked members of the opposite sex. And not just their eyes.
Just imagine how he must have felt when those two naked 16 year-old girls walked past him to the showers. That is way way too old to be going into the changing rooms with your mum.
and i wouldn't let them in men's loos either until they are older you just don't know in this day and age