They're not students, they're a group of personal tutors from each department from the Accommodation Office. I think my uni may do things a little bit differently from others as we don't have a group of student mentors
OK it's sounds slightly similar to the tutoring system we had at my place.
It could be that at the moment so early on in the term that alternative accommodation is not available, due to no 'dop-outs' yet, but that I still think that you could approach the Accommodation Manager. Be nice and say you appreciate it's a delicate situation, but it is making life all round very difficult, and would appreciate some feedback as to how long they think it may take to solve. Be reasonable, but firm.
OK it's sounds slightly similar to the tutoring system we had at my place.
It could be that at the moment so early on in the term that alternative accommodation is not available, due to no 'dop-outs' yet, but that I still think that you could approach the Accommodation Manager. Be nice and say you appreciate it's a delicate situation, but it is making life all round very difficult, and would appreciate some feedback as to how long they think it may take to solve. Be reasonable, but firm.
Just noticed this. This does put a slightly different slant on it, you should definietly go to someone higher in the Accommodation Dept.
No, she hasn't because she doesn't really blame him. Do you think she should?
I don't think sympathy for the medical condition of a person you have just met should over-ride your need for personal security. You have described your flat mate as "quite dangerous" and to be honest I think this is more than you and your flatmates should be expected to put up with.
Your female flatmate was assaulted. The fact that the person who assaulted her has a medical condition is not her problem. What if next time he hits someone and they are really badly hurt?
Have you talked to someone at the Uni - for instance your own tutor or some confidential counsellor in Student Union or something ..
They will almost certainly have a confidential word with the accommodation team - and may be able to help you and him and everyone.
You seem to be so kind and capable ... but this situation must be resolved ...
No, she hasn't because she doesn't really blame him. Do you think she should?
He should be reported, if it wasn't so long ago that it would look ridiculous to do so, because everyone whatever their disabilities, should know that hitting people isn't acceptable. If he's just allowed to do what he likes he'll never learn what's right and wrong.
If I were you I'd ask to be moved on the grounds that I'm scared of him as he's already hit someone!
OP you need to speak to someone about some support, you started a thread about IBS that was causing you discomfort, you had a friend if a recall who has serious OCD, you started a thread the other day about you suffering hairloss and I recall someone mentioning you'd been pulling it out. Now there's the thread about having difficulties with Autistic flat mate :eek:
No wonder if it was true you're pulling your hair out.
OP you need to speak to someone about some support, you started a thread about IBS that was causing you discomfort, you had a friend if a recall who has serious OCD, you started a thread the other day about you suffering hairloss and I recall someone mentioning you'd been pulling it out. Now there's the thread about having difficulties with Autistic flat mate :eek:
No wonder if it was true you're pulling your hair out.
Starting Uni is a stressful time and both health problems mentioned by the OP in other threads could be stress-related. And she cares about her friends when they have problems. Doesn't seem any more than that to me. I think suggesting she is making this up is a bit off really.
" it quickly became evident that one of my flatmates is autistic"
May I ask if it is confirmed that he has an Autistic Spectrum Disorder or is it just speculation?
We told the support team our concerns and they assessed him and confirmed he was autistic Sorry, I should have explained a bit more. I'm not very good at explaining things!
OP you need to speak to someone about some support, you started a thread about IBS that was causing you discomfort, you had a friend if a recall who has serious OCD, you started a thread the other day about you suffering hairloss and I recall someone mentioning you'd been pulling it out. Now there's the thread about having difficulties with Autistic flat mate :eek:
No wonder if it was true you're pulling your hair out.
I'm fine, but thank you. I don't think I have any more problems than anyone else my age.
I don't think sympathy for the medical condition of a person you have just met should over-ride your need for personal security. You have described your flat mate as "quite dangerous" and to be honest I think this is more than you and your flatmates should be expected to put up with.
Your female flatmate was assaulted. The fact that the person who assaulted her has a medical condition is not her problem. What if next time he hits someone and they are really badly hurt?
Agree with this.
He shouldn't be living with others if he can't control his temper - whether it's his medical condition or not. He needs proper support and you students are trained to do this. Nor should you be expected to.
I would be very wary of him. Who knows what he might do. If he's getting up at 2am to wash the floor and someone comes in and upsets him, who's to say he won't attack someone again.
Starting Uni is a stressful time and both health problems mentioned by the OP in other threads could be stress-related. And she cares about her friends when they have problems. Doesn't seem any more than that to me. I think suggesting she is making this up is a bit off really.
Thank you!
I'm really just interested in helping my flatmate. I'm sorry to anyone who thinks I'm making a big deal out of nothing, but it's very hard to live with someone you don't understand at all.
He shouldn't be living with others if he can't control his temper - whether it's his medical condition or not. He needs proper support and you students are trained to do this. Nor should you be expected to.
I would be very wary of him. Who knows what he might do. If he's getting up at 2am to wash the floor and someone comes in and upsets him, who's to say he won't attack someone again.
You definitely have a point. I think I'll bring it up again with the residence support team. Thank you!
He shouldn't be living with others if he can't control his temper - whether it's his medical condition or not. He needs proper support and you students are trained to do this. Nor should you be expected to.
I would be very wary of him. Who knows what he might do. If he's getting up at 2am to wash the floor and someone comes in and upsets him, who's to say he won't attack someone again.
That is why I wondered if there was a supported environment at the university, like a shared house with a support worker on site.
We told the support team our concerns and they assessed him and confirmed he was autistic
I'm sorry but something is not right here. Why would the support team tell you about someone elses diagnosis? More importantly, the student support team cannot diagnose ASD.
Starting Uni is a stressful time and both health problems mentioned by the OP in other threads could be stress-related. And she cares about her friends when they have problems. Doesn't seem any more than that to me. I think suggesting she is making this up is a bit off really.
The truth was in regards to whether or not what a poster said in previous thread about hairloss was true. The OP started a thread saying she was suffering hairloss, I though she meant it was something along the lines of Alopecia, but then another poster mentioned that she had been pulling the hair out.
I know Uni can be stressfull and that's why I said she should seek support.
I'm sorry but something is not right here. Why would the support team tell you about someone elses diagnosis? More importantly, the student support team cannot diagnose ASD.
I'm trying really hard to explain, sorry!
- we went to the support team after he hit my flatmate. We suspected he was autistic.
- the support team interviewed him and told us they thought he was autistic, and referred him to a qualified doctor (I don't know who) to get a proper assessment.
- they told us his diagnosis because we live with him and we have a right to know if he's dangerous or not. Also, if it wasn't for us he wouldn't have been diagnosed as his parents never got a diagnosis, so they needed to tell us to make sure we knew how to treat him etc as none of us has ever had contact with someone with autism before and we didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.
The truth was in regards to whether or not what a poster said in previous thread about hairloss was true. The OP started a thread saying she was suffering hairloss, I though she meant it was something along the lines of Alopecia, but then another poster mentioned that she had been pulling the hair out.
I know Uni can be stressfull and that's why I said she should seek support.
Sorry, but I really don't want to make this thread about me. I just want to know how to help my flatmate!
I'm sorry but something is not right here. Why would the support team tell you about someone elses diagnosis? More importantly, the student support team cannot diagnose ASD.
She didn't say they diagnosed him. She said they assessed him and confirmed he was autistic. EDIT: just seen it explained.
- we went to the support team after he hit my flatmate. We suspected he was autistic.
- the support team interviewed him and told us they thought he was autistic, and referred him to a qualified doctor (I don't know who) to get a proper assessment.
- they told us his diagnosis because we live with him and we have a right to know if he's dangerous or not. Also, if it wasn't for us he wouldn't have been diagnosed as his parents never got a diagnosis, so they needed to tell us to make sure we knew how to treat him etc as none of us has ever had contact with someone with autism before and we didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.
This explains his parent refusal to accept any responsibility in helping you guys out.
This explains his parent refusal to accept any responsibility in helping you guys out.
Yes, it does - sorry, reading back my post made it sound like they had known and just dumped him on us. My flatmates and I believe that his severe speech impediment might have meant his parents focused more on that and blamed his speech for his inability to communicate. His speech is incredibly bad.
- we went to the support team after he hit my flatmate. We suspected he was autistic.
- the support team interviewed him and told us they thought he was autistic, and referred him to a qualified doctor (I don't know who) to get a proper assessment.
- they told us his diagnosis because we live with him and we have a right to know if he's dangerous or not. Also, if it wasn't for us he wouldn't have been diagnosed as his parents never got a diagnosis, so they needed to tell us to make sure we knew how to treat him etc as none of us has ever had contact with someone with autism before and we didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.
I'm really sorry to go on but I really find this unfair. Unless this person lacks capacity then nobody should be told of his diagnosis and if he does lack capacity, info would be shared on a need to know basis.
Also, just because he may be autistic does not mean he is dangerous so none of his flatmates need to know of his condition.
I think you are either story telling or you live in a place where healthcare professionals are not very professional.
Sorry if that sounds harsh but just my opinion.
I'm really sorry to go on but I really find this unfair. Unless this person lacks capacity then nobody should be told of his diagnosis and if he does lack capacity, info would be shared on a need to know basis.
Also, just because he may be autistic does not mean he is dangerous so none of his flatmates need to know of his condition.
I think you are either story telling or you live in a place where healthcare professionals are not very professional.
Sorry if that sounds harsh but just my opinion.
Argh.
I don't know why anyone bothers to ask for advice on here any more! People always just assume you're lying. I'm sorry but I am tired of being accused of 'story-telling'. I'm not.
He is dangerous - if you've read the thread, he has already punched one of my flatmates, left the oven on so we've burnt ourselves and left the floor wet so we've fallen over. It's not his fault he's dangerous, but we live with him and we need to know that this sort of thing will continue in the future.
And yes, he does lack capacity - he cannot speak due to his severe speech impediment and as far as I know he had not received a diagnosis prior to living with my flatmates and me. We were the ones who realised his symptoms and asked that he be assessed for both his and our safety.
Comments
OK it's sounds slightly similar to the tutoring system we had at my place.
It could be that at the moment so early on in the term that alternative accommodation is not available, due to no 'dop-outs' yet, but that I still think that you could approach the Accommodation Manager. Be nice and say you appreciate it's a delicate situation, but it is making life all round very difficult, and would appreciate some feedback as to how long they think it may take to solve. Be reasonable, but firm.
Just noticed this. This does put a slightly different slant on it, you should definietly go to someone higher in the Accommodation Dept.
No, she hasn't because she doesn't really blame him. Do you think she should?
OK, thank you!
No, not necessarily.
I don't think sympathy for the medical condition of a person you have just met should over-ride your need for personal security. You have described your flat mate as "quite dangerous" and to be honest I think this is more than you and your flatmates should be expected to put up with.
Your female flatmate was assaulted. The fact that the person who assaulted her has a medical condition is not her problem. What if next time he hits someone and they are really badly hurt?
They will almost certainly have a confidential word with the accommodation team - and may be able to help you and him and everyone.
You seem to be so kind and capable ... but this situation must be resolved ...
Anyone can get into a university these days. It's the place where women lose their inhibitions, boys become men and alcohol runs freely.
May I ask if it is confirmed that he has an Autistic Spectrum Disorder or is it just speculation?
If I were you I'd ask to be moved on the grounds that I'm scared of him as he's already hit someone!
No wonder if it was true you're pulling your hair out.
Starting Uni is a stressful time and both health problems mentioned by the OP in other threads could be stress-related. And she cares about her friends when they have problems. Doesn't seem any more than that to me. I think suggesting she is making this up is a bit off really.
We told the support team our concerns and they assessed him and confirmed he was autistic
I'm fine, but thank you. I don't think I have any more problems than anyone else my age.
Agree with this.
He shouldn't be living with others if he can't control his temper - whether it's his medical condition or not. He needs proper support and you students are trained to do this. Nor should you be expected to.
I would be very wary of him. Who knows what he might do. If he's getting up at 2am to wash the floor and someone comes in and upsets him, who's to say he won't attack someone again.
Thank you!
I'm really just interested in helping my flatmate. I'm sorry to anyone who thinks I'm making a big deal out of nothing, but it's very hard to live with someone you don't understand at all.
You definitely have a point. I think I'll bring it up again with the residence support team. Thank you!
That is why I wondered if there was a supported environment at the university, like a shared house with a support worker on site.
I'm sorry but something is not right here. Why would the support team tell you about someone elses diagnosis? More importantly, the student support team cannot diagnose ASD.
The truth was in regards to whether or not what a poster said in previous thread about hairloss was true. The OP started a thread saying she was suffering hairloss, I though she meant it was something along the lines of Alopecia, but then another poster mentioned that she had been pulling the hair out.
I know Uni can be stressfull and that's why I said she should seek support.
I'm trying really hard to explain, sorry!
- we went to the support team after he hit my flatmate. We suspected he was autistic.
- the support team interviewed him and told us they thought he was autistic, and referred him to a qualified doctor (I don't know who) to get a proper assessment.
- they told us his diagnosis because we live with him and we have a right to know if he's dangerous or not. Also, if it wasn't for us he wouldn't have been diagnosed as his parents never got a diagnosis, so they needed to tell us to make sure we knew how to treat him etc as none of us has ever had contact with someone with autism before and we didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.
Sorry, but I really don't want to make this thread about me. I just want to know how to help my flatmate!
She didn't say they diagnosed him. She said they assessed him and confirmed he was autistic. EDIT: just seen it explained.
This explains his parent refusal to accept any responsibility in helping you guys out.
Yes, it does - sorry, reading back my post made it sound like they had known and just dumped him on us. My flatmates and I believe that his severe speech impediment might have meant his parents focused more on that and blamed his speech for his inability to communicate. His speech is incredibly bad.
I'm really sorry to go on but I really find this unfair. Unless this person lacks capacity then nobody should be told of his diagnosis and if he does lack capacity, info would be shared on a need to know basis.
Also, just because he may be autistic does not mean he is dangerous so none of his flatmates need to know of his condition.
I think you are either story telling or you live in a place where healthcare professionals are not very professional.
Sorry if that sounds harsh but just my opinion.
Argh.
I don't know why anyone bothers to ask for advice on here any more! People always just assume you're lying. I'm sorry but I am tired of being accused of 'story-telling'. I'm not.
He is dangerous - if you've read the thread, he has already punched one of my flatmates, left the oven on so we've burnt ourselves and left the floor wet so we've fallen over. It's not his fault he's dangerous, but we live with him and we need to know that this sort of thing will continue in the future.
And yes, he does lack capacity - he cannot speak due to his severe speech impediment and as far as I know he had not received a diagnosis prior to living with my flatmates and me. We were the ones who realised his symptoms and asked that he be assessed for both his and our safety.
I take it you haven't been in my situation.