Such Thing as Indifference Towards Parents?
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With the other, rather depressing thread, about how it feels to lose a parent, I thought what about those who are indifferent to their parents?
Just read this article http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/feb/16/indifferent-towards-mother
"I can't remember the last time my mother and I hugged (though I hug my friends all the time) and the very thought of it makes me cringe"
This part particularity stood out for me, as my mother calls me "odd" for feeling this way. Now granted, in my situation I do believe my mother (mistakenly) thinks we are "friends", however I do not ever remember any "parental" relationship at all - our Grandparents took on that role.
Is there such thing as "indifference" to your parents? Or is there usually an underlying issue such as anger and resentment? Am I and the author of this article the only ones who just cannot bring themselves to hug their mother without feeling awkward?
Just read this article http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/feb/16/indifferent-towards-mother
"I can't remember the last time my mother and I hugged (though I hug my friends all the time) and the very thought of it makes me cringe"
This part particularity stood out for me, as my mother calls me "odd" for feeling this way. Now granted, in my situation I do believe my mother (mistakenly) thinks we are "friends", however I do not ever remember any "parental" relationship at all - our Grandparents took on that role.
Is there such thing as "indifference" to your parents? Or is there usually an underlying issue such as anger and resentment? Am I and the author of this article the only ones who just cannot bring themselves to hug their mother without feeling awkward?
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Although, if I'm honest, I don't have any love for her. She's not a nice woman at all.
My dad, on the other hand, I adore, and give him a hug every time I see him which is generally a couple of times a week.
I wonder if those facts are connected.
I have three Adult sons and a grown up foster son two foster children all the adults hug us (mum and dad) one of the foster children loves hugs (12yo) the other isn't able to hug but really likes to sit close to us. I think what you said is so sad. Parents and children (even Adult children) should hug eachother. I also believe this anti contact with parents has the potential to cause serious problems with future mental health and child raising for this generation.
My sons hug me because they want to I often don't instigate these hugs they do. My sons hug me even in the street I'm proud to say.:)
I do hug her now, as I think she prob needs it as much as I do:(
I hope the way I have been brought up hasn't made me "cold". I'm certainly not a touchy-feely person, however I like to think that the values and love taught to me by my Grandparents will be shown by me to my own kids one day. I feel sorry for those who have only known coldness by their closest adults.
I'm not either and I don't encourage it. I'm not that kind of person. In fact I find touchy feely types rather annoying.
I am not being rude or negative, just interested...Why?
At the end of the day some people aren't good at being parents
Do other people hug their parent of the opposite gender? I probably did hug my dad when I was much younger but I guess I'd feel a bit...weird(?) if I went to hug my dad somehow.
I'd thought about hugging my mum before Christmas, since I was quite stressed out etc. and then she had her accident and ended up in hospital, in a wheelchair. She asked me to hug her but its not the same as when your able to stand up properly
I'm exactly the same - I also hug my mum - always have.
Mother has a personality disorder and father didn't want children. So it was a bit awkward for all of us. Although I do relate to them in some respects, I identify more with my grandparents, and other adults in my life growing up.