What would you do if your girlfriend suddenly gained weight by no fault of her own? Would you then not find her physically attractive?
That's a bit disingenious tbh. The subject is whether it is shallow to be attracted to certain things and to limit yourself on that. At a basic level, it is not; shallowness is more complicated than what the OP revealed; everyone has preferences but those preferences are normally broader than two things and those preferences do not need to be met entirely for someone to be attracted to someone else.
It's completely possible to fall in love with someone who meets none or few of those physical preferences; as love is more meaninful than physical attraction. Physical attraction is also something which can grow with love.
If you fall in love with someone then if they change physically then that oftentimes doesn't matter as a long term, serious relationship with someone you love is deeper than that.
But of course, you already know that and are just being argumentative aren't you?
You have 'seen' a lot Danni. Or well at least imagined a lot
Yes of course cancer makes you fat
Aren't you lovely hey, calling your seriously ill friend a fat monster. At least Jra has some morals, unlike you
Nursed sick friend with cancer (tick) ambidextrous (tick) slept with men with big cocks (tick) wearing green on St Patrick's Day with pink undies (tick) told jra she feels sorry for him and he's sad (tick x 50) all men are 'looks only' when it comes to women...blah blah blah
Every bloody thread I go in
Need a break - seen way too much of this prolific old cobblers now.
That's a bit disingenious tbh. The subject is whether it is shallow to be attracted to certain things and to limit yourself on that. At a basic level, it is not; shallowness is more complicated than what the OP revealed; everyone has preferences but those preferences are normally broader than two things and those preferences do not need to be met entirely for someone to be attracted to someone else.
It's completely possible to fall in love with someone who meets none or few of those physical preferences; as love is more meaninful than physical attraction. Physical attraction is also something which can grow with love.
If you fall in love with someone then if they change physically then that oftentimes doesn't matter as a long term, serious relationship with someone you love is deeper than that.
But of course, you already know that and are just being argumentative aren't you?
No I am not being argumentative but a man I thought I knew told me he no longer loved his wife because she had cancer. He was a heartless vile individual.
Nursed sick friend with cancer (tick) ambidextrous (tick) slept with men with big cocks (tick) wearing green on St Patrick's Day with pink undies (tick) told jra she feels sorry for him and he's sad (tick x 50) all men are 'looks only' when it comes to women...blah blah blah
Every bloody thread I go in
Need a break - seen way too much of this prolific old cobblers now.
He can contribute what he likes on any thread on here.
You seem to about the only one judging him on here nowadays for what he wishes to do.
You yourself make comments from time to time about all those men you have dated in the past, no one appears to judge you for having dating a string of men friends at such a young age.
Is it not time to leave your bone buried?
Quite, I've often disagreed with things that jra has said; you can disagree with someone on one hand and agree with them on another. Also people can have broad views that change with context; there is no need to rip them apart needlessly; bringing a disagreement from one subject into another.
As I woman I don't have a type of man I am attracted to. What attracted me to the man I am with at the moment is his confidence. I watched him lecture to a room full of people and he didn't seem nervous at all.
If you are taking steroids it does. Actually "fat monster" was her words when I was nursing her.
I find it quite crass to refer to a cancer sufferer as a "fat monster" tbh; and to back it up with "she said it about herself" is weak; anyone with any ounce of empathy would be acutely aware that such a statement said in such horrible circumstances may not have been flippant or amusing to the victim but maybe a coping mechanism.
No I am not being argumentative but a man I thought I knew told me he no longer loved his wife because she had cancer. He was a heartless vile individual.
Could the BIB be very relevant to that situation? You present it as though it's quite common and realistic that someone would no longer be attracted or want to be with someone in those circumstances.
I've seen people do horrible things; such as getting a mail order girlfriend while his wife was on her death bed (I shit you not). That individual did something terrible and heartless, but that does not make it the norm, it makes them abnorbal. If I presented that as anything other than shocking behaviour I would be acting in a hyberbolic and judgemental manner, probably looking for a rise from people.
Quite, I've often disagreed with things that jra has said; you can disagree with someone on one hand and agree with them on another. Also people can have broad views that change with context; there is no need to rip them apart needlessly; bringing a disagreement from one subject into another.
So as a woman you have no preferences?
I find it quite crass to refer to a cancer sufferer as a "fat monster" tbh; and to back it up with "she said it about herself" is weak; anyone with any ounce of empathy would be acutely aware that such a statement said in such horrible circumstances may not have been flippant or amusing to the victim but maybe a coping mechanism.
We were extremely close we used to tell each other everything and I don't think I will ever get over her death.
We were extremely close we used to tell each other everything and I don't think I will ever get over her death.
Sorry... what?
I am not sure how that answers any of the points I raised in my post and at no point did I ever doubt that you were close to the person or question your capacity to get over her death.
If I'd been a trouble maker on DS to the extent you are, I would have been perma banned/made inactive years ago. I've been here over 12 years. You 2-3 months. Spot the difference?
So I was telling this female friend of mine that I am only attracted to slim and busty girls and she accused me of being shallow.
What I don't get is that she is only attracted to tall men and she had the nerve to all me shallow >:(
Not so much shallow, just very very predictable. You are attracted to the glamour model type who features very heavily in porn. Hardly a personal taste just what is assumed to be the generic preference of most men. If you were attracted only to short girls with large hairy feet that might be actually worthy of starting a thread ...
I hope you are right. I watched a friend go from a pretty slim woman to a bald fat monster because of cancer. Her own family couldn't stand to be in the same room as her. Very sad to witness ...
Wt am I reading? Someone has cancer and you call her a fat bald monster. Her own family couldn't stand to be in her room because she was fat and bald? Good lord. I can't believe my eyes. What horrible people and what a horrible thing to call someone suffering from a disease who is supposed to be a friend. I think people get up on you a bit too much on here lately but this time it is deserved, sorry but it is.
Not so much shallow, just very very predictable. You are attracted to the glamour model type who features very heavily in porn. Hardly a personal taste just what is assumed to be the generic preference of most men. If you were attracted only to short girls with large hairy feet that might be actually worthy of starting a thread ...
Yes I agree. There is something a bit ho-hum and entitled about saying "I am only attracted to people who are REALLY good looking, and everyone can see it." It is no more admirable than saying you are only attracted to wealthy people.
And through the spat about calling someone a fat monster, there is a glimmer of truth. Someone who is 'only attracted to' someone stereotypically attractive seems to be a poor long-term prospect in a world where people may become ill or less mobile. I realize that not everyone is interested in a long-term relationship, but those who think they are should take on board that in the real world women often don't 'snap back into shape' after having a couple of children, both men and women tend to get fatter over time, and that serious illnesses are rarely cosmetically pleasing and can strike anyone at any time.
No idea about pics but I am not the one who has been sending flirty PMs. ;-)
So confused. Someone came into the thread made a random comment about someone getting unsolicited photoshopped pics. Then when asked about it said to ask you, but you're saying its not true you've not been sent or received these pics? I don't know what the hell the poster was going on about then.
Comments
Not if you have an inoperable brain tumour.
I think there is a few on here....none as big, rude and judgemental as you though.
Probably best tone down the lies and attitude a bit, that's if you want to stay here
That's a bit disingenious tbh. The subject is whether it is shallow to be attracted to certain things and to limit yourself on that. At a basic level, it is not; shallowness is more complicated than what the OP revealed; everyone has preferences but those preferences are normally broader than two things and those preferences do not need to be met entirely for someone to be attracted to someone else.
It's completely possible to fall in love with someone who meets none or few of those physical preferences; as love is more meaninful than physical attraction. Physical attraction is also something which can grow with love.
If you fall in love with someone then if they change physically then that oftentimes doesn't matter as a long term, serious relationship with someone you love is deeper than that.
But of course, you already know that and are just being argumentative aren't you?
You ignored the question
I have noticed you are good at that
Is that a threat?
Every bloody thread I go in
Need a break - seen way too much of this prolific old cobblers now.
No I am not being argumentative but a man I thought I knew told me he no longer loved his wife because she had cancer. He was a heartless vile individual.
trolling again? ;-)
I'd rather they stay here in their present form, as it's a known quantity, because they will only re-register again, if they find themselves inactive.
are you a mod?
I'll leave you to talk to yourselves ;-)
Quite, I've often disagreed with things that jra has said; you can disagree with someone on one hand and agree with them on another. Also people can have broad views that change with context; there is no need to rip them apart needlessly; bringing a disagreement from one subject into another.
So as a woman you have no preferences?
I find it quite crass to refer to a cancer sufferer as a "fat monster" tbh; and to back it up with "she said it about herself" is weak; anyone with any ounce of empathy would be acutely aware that such a statement said in such horrible circumstances may not have been flippant or amusing to the victim but maybe a coping mechanism.
Could the BIB be very relevant to that situation? You present it as though it's quite common and realistic that someone would no longer be attracted or want to be with someone in those circumstances.
I've seen people do horrible things; such as getting a mail order girlfriend while his wife was on her death bed (I shit you not). That individual did something terrible and heartless, but that does not make it the norm, it makes them abnorbal. If I presented that as anything other than shocking behaviour I would be acting in a hyberbolic and judgemental manner, probably looking for a rise from people.
We were extremely close we used to tell each other everything and I don't think I will ever get over her death.
Thankfully for you I'm not, because you would have been shown the door ages ago.
ditto to you
Sorry... what?
I am not sure how that answers any of the points I raised in my post and at no point did I ever doubt that you were close to the person or question your capacity to get over her death.
That's fine with me. No worries. I don't expect people to agree with me all the time. I accept that. How one goes about disagreeing is another story.
If I'd been a trouble maker on DS to the extent you are, I would have been perma banned/made inactive years ago. I've been here over 12 years. You 2-3 months. Spot the difference?
Not so much shallow, just very very predictable. You are attracted to the glamour model type who features very heavily in porn. Hardly a personal taste just what is assumed to be the generic preference of most men. If you were attracted only to short girls with large hairy feet that might be actually worthy of starting a thread ...
No idea about pics but I am not the one who has been sending flirty PMs. ;-)
Wt am I reading? Someone has cancer and you call her a fat bald monster. Her own family couldn't stand to be in her room because she was fat and bald? Good lord. I can't believe my eyes. What horrible people and what a horrible thing to call someone suffering from a disease who is supposed to be a friend. I think people get up on you a bit too much on here lately but this time it is deserved, sorry but it is.
That's what makes them more special! ;-)
Yes I agree. There is something a bit ho-hum and entitled about saying "I am only attracted to people who are REALLY good looking, and everyone can see it." It is no more admirable than saying you are only attracted to wealthy people.
And through the spat about calling someone a fat monster, there is a glimmer of truth. Someone who is 'only attracted to' someone stereotypically attractive seems to be a poor long-term prospect in a world where people may become ill or less mobile. I realize that not everyone is interested in a long-term relationship, but those who think they are should take on board that in the real world women often don't 'snap back into shape' after having a couple of children, both men and women tend to get fatter over time, and that serious illnesses are rarely cosmetically pleasing and can strike anyone at any time.
So confused. Someone came into the thread made a random comment about someone getting unsolicited photoshopped pics. Then when asked about it said to ask you, but you're saying its not true you've not been sent or received these pics? I don't know what the hell the poster was going on about then.