17 and a double bed
I am not so much seeking advice as maybe views?
My (just) 17 year old son has just taken delivery of a double bed. Up until now, when his girlfriend has stayed over she has slept either in the spare room, or more lately, on a spare bed in his room. I am not being naive, but I really do not have any idea whether they are sexually active or not. They have been seeing each other since August 2008.
My partner and I are now in disagreement about where she sleeps in future - one says she can stay in his room, in the double as there is no room for the spare, and the other says back in the spare room.
I am really in a qunadry.
Would appreciate some views or comments.
Thanks
My (just) 17 year old son has just taken delivery of a double bed. Up until now, when his girlfriend has stayed over she has slept either in the spare room, or more lately, on a spare bed in his room. I am not being naive, but I really do not have any idea whether they are sexually active or not. They have been seeing each other since August 2008.
My partner and I are now in disagreement about where she sleeps in future - one says she can stay in his room, in the double as there is no room for the spare, and the other says back in the spare room.
I am really in a qunadry.
Would appreciate some views or comments.
Thanks
0
Comments
I imagine this was just for appearences.. come lights out they were in the same bed. Leave them to it I say the only difference will be the size of the bed.
Agreed
They're sexually active.
They've been together for over a year and a half - I'm 99% sure they're having sexual relations by now.
I would consider it a bit mean to now ask her to sleep in the spare room if previously you allowed her in the same room.
But its your house and your rules so whatever makes you feel comfortable.
Either that or he's got the patience and self-control of a Buddhist monk - not to mention a serious case of blue-balls.
Agreed. They're at it like rabbits
It's your house so it's up to you and your partner to decide whether they can share a room. However, if they are having sex then in my experience they will do so whether they are allowed to share the bed/room or not.
initiative. i like that.
I started going out with my girl friend nearly 4 years ago, when I was 18 and she was 16, and it took about a year before we slept in the same room. I slept on the floor, regardless of who's house we were at, but after a bit we started sharing the same single bed, which was shall we say, a little cramped.
Now her brother has moved out and gone off to Uni, living there, so we have taken his old room and redecorated, and we have a 3/4 bed. It's so much better than being on a single or the floor.
They've been together for 18 months now, which is a long time at that age, so I'd say they're pretty serious. Letting them have a double bed would probably make things better.
But yeah. They're definitely having "the sex".
I think I'd be more worried about him if they WEREN'T, given the sleeping arrangements thus far
To be fair I wouldnt be worried about a 17 year old not planning on flying the nest just yet, pleanty of people hold on that until they are in their 20's.
I did, partly due to going to college, doing a second course and then going to uni (which was local).
Most people I know moved out at around 21-22 tbh.
Anyhow, at 17, and being together for 18 months I'd say they are probably having sex anyway and its better they do it in a safe environment than to be pushed into doing it in less desirable places.
I'd be more worried when he takes delivery of a cot.
17 is legal to have sex and if they are having sex ( im strongly guessing they are) then they probably have had sex in his bed anyway.
Do they spend time in his room apart from sleeping ie during the day?