ROFL, I think 450 pages maxed out the thread
I wonder if Wendy ever thought she'd got an answer
Raise a glass to:
Soulmateickle, MargeWoowoo and Pargeblabla, DarkestDthefailedpubsinger, Rustyhitchins, Jess Trumpet, Moletta Sax, Solar Dimples, Honeypot Cosgrove, GKL206-Dawn Mackenzie, feelsoluckyin the attic, WhybotherLyla, Emily Rossi, MaleesetheBuilder, XfusionPaddy, CPMarsh, MILFYB, MissRadioActiveTeeth, BikerDavona (had to bring in a bit of your screen name there) and LizzieSidLittle, carolinAzara, MexieMaxTFFS, RealityRocksFitBod, HandyBendyWendyPANTS, CeCeCheeky, SchoolTeachBling (that's a bit more down with the kids ) kenziekad(everyone's jellus) SugarHutSmee and MyVeryBestFriendalomiakoda, fancy-dandruff-boy, KrispyKremeKazzy and VampireyHaim(theonefromTheLostBoys)fingerupthebigsbum, Log(theoccasionalposteronthisforumnotapartofatreecommonlyusedforafire) LotsofLoveandKissesJeanniexxx, DrunktoOblivian, OneandOnlyDanceTeacher,
Holiday RepCristalMeth
Monday 11th September 2006 - The one about the sexiest dancer in the world and KARMA.
It's 9pm, last night I didn't go to bed til 2am and this morning I was up at 7.30am to go to my first proper dance rehearsal with Ben (the GORGEOUS one from Strictly Dance Fever) and Vanessa. As I've mentioned before, I'm on the All Star Talent Show this Friday night. I am soooooo looking forward to it! I slept in the car the whole way to the studio in London. I woke up, had a quick **** and went in to see Ben and Vanessa already hard at work sorting out our routine. For the next three hours we learnt the routine and went over and over it. We have included two AMAZING lifts and three smaller ones. By the time the rehearsal was over I felt confident that it's going to look amazing. Having never done an American Smooth before I struggled a bit with learning the style but now that I have the routine completely memorized, I can get to work on perfecting it and looking as good as Ben does.
The last time we did the dance all the way through, I got one of the crew to film it on my camera for me so that I can study it at home (well, also it's so I can perve over Ben). Even though it was still looking quite rough, you can tell how good it's going to look on the night (touch wood). For the first time since being back from Cyprus, I actually feel happy again. I was so sad to come home and even the thought of doing the show wasn't lifting me. I think I just felt like there's nothing here for me and although I still feel that (and am definitely planning to move abroad), for now at least there is the joy of Ben (and dancing) to get me through! Already tonight I have shown off my video to my mum, dad, Lauren and Jordan. I'm showing it to everyone, in fact I'm even gonna show my postman in the morning! I'm so happy!
Ben is so gorgeous that I even forgot about the barman for a little while. Actually, for a long while. Even if I never see Ben again after this show is over, I am thrilled at having worked with him and will always treasure my sexy video! Ha ha. The producer of the show was over the moon with our dance. I have to say, it does look impressive. There's one lift that we do where Ben lifts me above his own head with one hand! Basically I sit my bum on his hand and he stands up and straightens his arm upwards. He's VERY strong! Ooooh and don't we just love a strong man?!
We were both sweating uncontrollably after the session today (ha ha, that sounded rude! Although I wouldn't mind if it had been a session of the 'rude' kind!) and I now have no less than 6 blisters on my feet from the new heels. Nice. Lastly (so that I don't waffle on forever about how happy/excited/honoured I am and/or how sexy/gorgeous/talented Ben is) I just want to say that I am beaming from ear to ear. My whole body hurts (in a good way though) and this is the best job ever!!!!!!!!!
When I got home, me and Jord went to Pizza Express for a late lunch and popped in to see Carolina. I then had to pick Lauren up from school. Her car is being fixed from when I backed into it in my monster truck (it threw her car 6 feet across my drive). I took her to the car place to see if it was ready - it wasn't - so we went back to mine where I discovered Lyla had swallowed a coat hanger. Lovely. We headed straight down the vets for an emergency appointment and then I dropped Lauren back at her mums afterwards cos she is borrowing her car for a few days. I then went home to lie on the sofa and read my 9th Jackie Collins of the collection. I could easily have fallen asleep there (or gotten a fit bloke round to cuddle and watch a film with) but I thought I'd be a good girl and write a blog instead. Aren't you the lucky ones?! Ha ha. You get to hear how much I fancy Ben, how much I love dancing and get to hear just general insane waffling too.
Actually, it was just that I realised I don't really have anyone I could call to get over for a cuddle and film. I've lost all interest in boys since being in Cyprus. Not only does the fit barman blow all the others out of the water (and so does Ben but unfortunately he has a bird! Sorry Dawn - I love you to bits and you're gorgeous but God damn I'm jealous!) but he has brought me to my senses in terms of not wasting another minute of my time with people who clearly don't deserve it! The barman actually said to me while we were laying cuddling one night "I really hope you find a wicked bloke one day Jode. You really deserve it. Someone who'll treat you like a princess and look after you". It made me want to cry. There's a very good reason I can't be with the barman so I took what he said as a very loving and nice thing to say. I know he meant it and I appreciated him saying it. Most of the blokes I've been out with have been w*nkers who haven't been nice to me themselves, let alone cared if one day I would meet someone who would treat me right.
I met Oliver Skeet today (the show-jumper). He's also on the show on Friday night, he's singing a song. He's a really lovely guy and we had a real laugh on one of our breaks! I hear that Roy Walker from Catchphrase is on our show this week as well. What a legend! Ha ha. Can't wait for it!
Last night Linsey Dawn Mackenzie, her hubbie Mark and their baby Luca came over. They're over in England for a few days. It was soooooo lovely to see them. My mum and dad were chuffed to see them too cos they love all three of them. Luca is fourteen months now and is getting more and more handsome by the second. Linsey looked as stunning as ever and Mark is just gorgeous. They bought me a present for moving into my new house!! They got me the most beautiful scented candles in a velvet box and a set of mega-trendy crystal glasses. I loved them! We had such a laugh with them. I'm always happy and laughing when I'm with Linsey and Mark. They are such a lovely couple and both are such big characters that they never fail to have you in stitches! We decided against going out as we had so much to catch up on that we didn't want to be in a noisy bar. Instead we stayed at my mum's til late then I took them over to my new house to show them it. I've decided that if Cyprus doesn't come off in the next few weeks then I am going to get a flight over to their house in Marbella and stay with them for a week. I really miss them now that they don't live here anymore. Even though I was shattered tired, I perked up as soon as they arrived and didn't want them to leave! At 1.45am when they left I got a call from one of the footballers I met in Marbella. I think he plays for Fulham (actually I might be wrong - I don't even know if that's a real team - it doesn't sound right - I might have just made that up!). He was singing songs to me down the phone. Actually he was singing "sing a song of sixpence....." Nutter! It made me laugh though and I woke up this morning smiling.
Just changing the subject.... One of my best mates Alex got beaten up by a load of girls while I was in Cyprus. It was a totally unprovoked attack and they beat her so badly her face was almost unrecognisable. They stamped their stilettos down on her while she was on the floor and punctured her groin. They even stamped on her head! She hadn't done a single thing to deserve it and there were loads of them against just her!!!! She was in the Sun newspaper on Saturday (they reported the crime and printed her picture). I say it time and time again - WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO??!!!!! It's another sign that we all need to leave this country. I will NEVER bring my children up here! It's too violent and there are too many sickos. I've been beaten up by girls before and they are even worse than men when it comes to fighting. I had two black eyes. Luckily for me, my beating wasn't half as bad as Alex's though. I feel so sorry for her. She's the nicest person you'll ever meet. I've never even heard her slag someone off or bitch about someone and I've known her since I was about 7 years old. It makes me sick to think that people can do that to an innocent person walking down the street (and even more sick to think that they could do it to someone as sweet and gentle as Alex). I hope the police catch who did it and they get punished (although my guess is they'll just get off with a warning as our justice and law system is the worst in the world!).
These girls were right geezer-birds by all accounts (well, obviously to be beating someone up - they were hardly going to be beautiful, talented, well-off upstanding and respectable members of the community were they?!) From the minute I heard about it I knew that they would be vile lady-boys with filthy mouths and dirty nails. I mean, you can just imagine how hideous they must be. Blokes who go out starting fights are scumbags, girls are even worse. The only positive Alex and I can derive from the horrific attack is our favourite old saying "what goes around comes around". Garry beat me (and everyone else) up for years and he's now in prison for murder (How's your life mate? Going well for you?!). Rebekah Wade (Sun Editor) called me a tramp and vile for years and then ends up on the front of every newspaper for allegedly beating up her own husband (Ross baby - I'm still here if you ever need a comforting massage or even a hardcore session!) Ha ha. See, though - I speak the truth. If you are a bad person or you do bad things then it will come back on you in some way or another. You can't hide from Karma. It will come back and bite you on the bum when you are least expecting it and when it bites - God damn it's gonna hurt. That's why I can sleep at night you see. I know I'm a nice person. I might have the odd rant on here that gets a bit venomous but hey I'm allowed the freedom of speech and I only rant when someone has upset me first. I have to vent my anger some way and this is my tool. Other than that, I don't hurt anyone, I'm not nasty. I don't scream abuse at people, beat people up or deliberately set out to make someone else's life a misery. I know I'm going to Heaven and I also know that the girls who beat Alex up will get their come-uppance, just like Garry and Rebekah did. You live by the sword, you die by the sword. Nasty people come to a nasty end. Geezer-birds, whoever you are, enjoy life while you can cos it ain't gonna be good for you in the future!!!
So, Alex is ok now anyway. Well, as ok as she can be with a swollen face and punctured groin. She had 30 wounds in total! Can you believe the sickness of human beings?! It's no wonder I love animals so much really is it?! Alex is coming over mine tomorrow night when I finish filming for a girlie catch-up. I'm going to give her lots of cuddles and sympathy and I'm going to buy her a big present when I get a minute to myself to go shopping.
So, apart from one of my best mates being badly beaten up by a gang of bloke-ish ugly girls, everything is good in Jodie world. I've finally had a day where I haven't thought about the barman all day and even though I'm absolutely shattered from today (and all the work I've done since I've been back from Cyprus), I'm happy in the knowledge that tonight I will watch the video of me and Ben at least another ten times before I go to sleep. It's better than porn!!!!!!!!!
Lots of love and tender soft kisses all over your lips and neck and chest. In fact, while I'm there I'd gently nibble you and trace little circles around your nipples with my tongue. Mmmmmmmn......
Jodie
Xxxx
P.S Remember - what goes around comes around - be nice at ALL times!
P.P.S This video really IS better than porn! I'm loving it!!!!!!
P.P.P.S It's not really my place to say anything at all but since it is the 11th September today I thought I should just say that my thoughts are with all the victims' families and I hope that they are all doing ok. Lots of love and my deepest sympathies. Try to keep smiling x x x x x x x x
Just watching Trisha (the joys of sick leave)~it mentioned its secret "celebrity" expert (on what keeps a man interested in the bedroom) is doing a show soon (it gave no date).
It would have been nice if she had decided not to blog because of 9/11 if that was the road she wanted to take rather than a P.P.P.S at the bottom, under her dance video with Ben being like porn, to be honest, it just looks tacky.
Is there any way the old thread can be archived? (I'm a technophobe). I'd hate to think of it dropping down the pages and then disappearing forevah
Is Friday night going to be party night then, to celebrate our new home whilst watching la Marsh on the All Star Talent Show? I'll bring the salad kebabs
HandyBendyWendyPANTS wanders into the new thread, sniffs the freshly painted untainted walls, breathes in the air and notices not even a faint whiff of self-tan or peppermint puke, checks the carpet for dog-poo, finds none and gasps when notices that the strippers pole hasn't yet been installed FILTH!!!!
Give it a few days of CARNAGE and this squeaky clean thread will feel as much at home as LylaPlum sleeping on Jodies pile of unwashed underwear on her manky bedroom floor COMEDY!!!!
What d'you mean? I'm referring to the single longest thread i.e. the one with the most pages/posts.
Yes, I realised that, sorry, what I meant was that with over four hundred and fifty thousand threads, chances are it's not been the longest
Although, of course, it might have been.
Comments
I wonder if Wendy ever thought she'd got an answer
Raise a glass to:
Soulmateickle, MargeWoowoo and Pargeblabla, DarkestDthefailedpubsinger, Rustyhitchins, Jess Trumpet, Moletta Sax, Solar Dimples, Honeypot Cosgrove, GKL206-Dawn Mackenzie, feelsoluckyin the attic, WhybotherLyla, Emily Rossi, MaleesetheBuilder, XfusionPaddy, CPMarsh, MILFYB, MissRadioActiveTeeth, BikerDavona (had to bring in a bit of your screen name there) and LizzieSidLittle, carolinAzara, MexieMaxTFFS, RealityRocksFitBod, HandyBendyWendyPANTS, CeCeCheeky, SchoolTeachBling (that's a bit more down with the kids ) kenziekad(everyone's jellus) SugarHutSmee and MyVeryBestFriendalomiakoda, fancy-dandruff-boy, KrispyKremeKazzy and VampireyHaim(theonefromTheLostBoys)fingerupthebigsbum, Log(theoccasionalposteronthisforumnotapartofatreecommonlyusedforafire) LotsofLoveandKissesJeanniexxx, DrunktoOblivian, OneandOnlyDanceTeacher,
Holiday RepCristalMeth
Cheers all, Do we get Jodie Mush to do the official opening?
We broke the forum yesterday!
YAY!!
You reckon? Is that the longest thread on DS so far?
Ickle, I am about to PM you for some advice.
x
i feel a bit sad actually
can someone please post her latest blog for me - her website seems to be broken as well!!
Oooh I am intrigued.
I'm pretty gutted, there was some comedy fried gold in that thread!
It's 9pm, last night I didn't go to bed til 2am and this morning I was up at 7.30am to go to my first proper dance rehearsal with Ben (the GORGEOUS one from Strictly Dance Fever) and Vanessa. As I've mentioned before, I'm on the All Star Talent Show this Friday night. I am soooooo looking forward to it! I slept in the car the whole way to the studio in London. I woke up, had a quick **** and went in to see Ben and Vanessa already hard at work sorting out our routine. For the next three hours we learnt the routine and went over and over it. We have included two AMAZING lifts and three smaller ones. By the time the rehearsal was over I felt confident that it's going to look amazing. Having never done an American Smooth before I struggled a bit with learning the style but now that I have the routine completely memorized, I can get to work on perfecting it and looking as good as Ben does.
The last time we did the dance all the way through, I got one of the crew to film it on my camera for me so that I can study it at home (well, also it's so I can perve over Ben). Even though it was still looking quite rough, you can tell how good it's going to look on the night (touch wood). For the first time since being back from Cyprus, I actually feel happy again. I was so sad to come home and even the thought of doing the show wasn't lifting me. I think I just felt like there's nothing here for me and although I still feel that (and am definitely planning to move abroad), for now at least there is the joy of Ben (and dancing) to get me through! Already tonight I have shown off my video to my mum, dad, Lauren and Jordan. I'm showing it to everyone, in fact I'm even gonna show my postman in the morning! I'm so happy!
Ben is so gorgeous that I even forgot about the barman for a little while. Actually, for a long while. Even if I never see Ben again after this show is over, I am thrilled at having worked with him and will always treasure my sexy video! Ha ha. The producer of the show was over the moon with our dance. I have to say, it does look impressive. There's one lift that we do where Ben lifts me above his own head with one hand! Basically I sit my bum on his hand and he stands up and straightens his arm upwards. He's VERY strong! Ooooh and don't we just love a strong man?!
We were both sweating uncontrollably after the session today (ha ha, that sounded rude! Although I wouldn't mind if it had been a session of the 'rude' kind!) and I now have no less than 6 blisters on my feet from the new heels. Nice. Lastly (so that I don't waffle on forever about how happy/excited/honoured I am and/or how sexy/gorgeous/talented Ben is) I just want to say that I am beaming from ear to ear. My whole body hurts (in a good way though) and this is the best job ever!!!!!!!!!
When I got home, me and Jord went to Pizza Express for a late lunch and popped in to see Carolina. I then had to pick Lauren up from school. Her car is being fixed from when I backed into it in my monster truck (it threw her car 6 feet across my drive). I took her to the car place to see if it was ready - it wasn't - so we went back to mine where I discovered Lyla had swallowed a coat hanger. Lovely. We headed straight down the vets for an emergency appointment and then I dropped Lauren back at her mums afterwards cos she is borrowing her car for a few days. I then went home to lie on the sofa and read my 9th Jackie Collins of the collection. I could easily have fallen asleep there (or gotten a fit bloke round to cuddle and watch a film with) but I thought I'd be a good girl and write a blog instead. Aren't you the lucky ones?! Ha ha. You get to hear how much I fancy Ben, how much I love dancing and get to hear just general insane waffling too.
Actually, it was just that I realised I don't really have anyone I could call to get over for a cuddle and film. I've lost all interest in boys since being in Cyprus. Not only does the fit barman blow all the others out of the water (and so does Ben but unfortunately he has a bird! Sorry Dawn - I love you to bits and you're gorgeous but God damn I'm jealous!) but he has brought me to my senses in terms of not wasting another minute of my time with people who clearly don't deserve it! The barman actually said to me while we were laying cuddling one night "I really hope you find a wicked bloke one day Jode. You really deserve it. Someone who'll treat you like a princess and look after you". It made me want to cry. There's a very good reason I can't be with the barman so I took what he said as a very loving and nice thing to say. I know he meant it and I appreciated him saying it. Most of the blokes I've been out with have been w*nkers who haven't been nice to me themselves, let alone cared if one day I would meet someone who would treat me right.
I met Oliver Skeet today (the show-jumper). He's also on the show on Friday night, he's singing a song. He's a really lovely guy and we had a real laugh on one of our breaks! I hear that Roy Walker from Catchphrase is on our show this week as well. What a legend! Ha ha. Can't wait for it!
Last night Linsey Dawn Mackenzie, her hubbie Mark and their baby Luca came over. They're over in England for a few days. It was soooooo lovely to see them. My mum and dad were chuffed to see them too cos they love all three of them. Luca is fourteen months now and is getting more and more handsome by the second. Linsey looked as stunning as ever and Mark is just gorgeous. They bought me a present for moving into my new house!! They got me the most beautiful scented candles in a velvet box and a set of mega-trendy crystal glasses. I loved them! We had such a laugh with them. I'm always happy and laughing when I'm with Linsey and Mark. They are such a lovely couple and both are such big characters that they never fail to have you in stitches! We decided against going out as we had so much to catch up on that we didn't want to be in a noisy bar. Instead we stayed at my mum's til late then I took them over to my new house to show them it. I've decided that if Cyprus doesn't come off in the next few weeks then I am going to get a flight over to their house in Marbella and stay with them for a week. I really miss them now that they don't live here anymore. Even though I was shattered tired, I perked up as soon as they arrived and didn't want them to leave! At 1.45am when they left I got a call from one of the footballers I met in Marbella. I think he plays for Fulham (actually I might be wrong - I don't even know if that's a real team - it doesn't sound right - I might have just made that up!). He was singing songs to me down the phone. Actually he was singing "sing a song of sixpence....." Nutter! It made me laugh though and I woke up this morning smiling.
Just changing the subject.... One of my best mates Alex got beaten up by a load of girls while I was in Cyprus. It was a totally unprovoked attack and they beat her so badly her face was almost unrecognisable. They stamped their stilettos down on her while she was on the floor and punctured her groin. They even stamped on her head! She hadn't done a single thing to deserve it and there were loads of them against just her!!!! She was in the Sun newspaper on Saturday (they reported the crime and printed her picture). I say it time and time again - WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO??!!!!! It's another sign that we all need to leave this country. I will NEVER bring my children up here! It's too violent and there are too many sickos. I've been beaten up by girls before and they are even worse than men when it comes to fighting. I had two black eyes. Luckily for me, my beating wasn't half as bad as Alex's though. I feel so sorry for her. She's the nicest person you'll ever meet. I've never even heard her slag someone off or bitch about someone and I've known her since I was about 7 years old. It makes me sick to think that people can do that to an innocent person walking down the street (and even more sick to think that they could do it to someone as sweet and gentle as Alex). I hope the police catch who did it and they get punished (although my guess is they'll just get off with a warning as our justice and law system is the worst in the world!).
These girls were right geezer-birds by all accounts (well, obviously to be beating someone up - they were hardly going to be beautiful, talented, well-off upstanding and respectable members of the community were they?!) From the minute I heard about it I knew that they would be vile lady-boys with filthy mouths and dirty nails. I mean, you can just imagine how hideous they must be. Blokes who go out starting fights are scumbags, girls are even worse. The only positive Alex and I can derive from the horrific attack is our favourite old saying "what goes around comes around". Garry beat me (and everyone else) up for years and he's now in prison for murder (How's your life mate? Going well for you?!). Rebekah Wade (Sun Editor) called me a tramp and vile for years and then ends up on the front of every newspaper for allegedly beating up her own husband (Ross baby - I'm still here if you ever need a comforting massage or even a hardcore session!) Ha ha. See, though - I speak the truth. If you are a bad person or you do bad things then it will come back on you in some way or another. You can't hide from Karma. It will come back and bite you on the bum when you are least expecting it and when it bites - God damn it's gonna hurt. That's why I can sleep at night you see. I know I'm a nice person. I might have the odd rant on here that gets a bit venomous but hey I'm allowed the freedom of speech and I only rant when someone has upset me first. I have to vent my anger some way and this is my tool. Other than that, I don't hurt anyone, I'm not nasty. I don't scream abuse at people, beat people up or deliberately set out to make someone else's life a misery. I know I'm going to Heaven and I also know that the girls who beat Alex up will get their come-uppance, just like Garry and Rebekah did. You live by the sword, you die by the sword. Nasty people come to a nasty end. Geezer-birds, whoever you are, enjoy life while you can cos it ain't gonna be good for you in the future!!!
So, Alex is ok now anyway. Well, as ok as she can be with a swollen face and punctured groin. She had 30 wounds in total! Can you believe the sickness of human beings?! It's no wonder I love animals so much really is it?! Alex is coming over mine tomorrow night when I finish filming for a girlie catch-up. I'm going to give her lots of cuddles and sympathy and I'm going to buy her a big present when I get a minute to myself to go shopping.
So, apart from one of my best mates being badly beaten up by a gang of bloke-ish ugly girls, everything is good in Jodie world. I've finally had a day where I haven't thought about the barman all day and even though I'm absolutely shattered from today (and all the work I've done since I've been back from Cyprus), I'm happy in the knowledge that tonight I will watch the video of me and Ben at least another ten times before I go to sleep. It's better than porn!!!!!!!!!
Lots of love and tender soft kisses all over your lips and neck and chest. In fact, while I'm there I'd gently nibble you and trace little circles around your nipples with my tongue. Mmmmmmmn......
Jodie
Xxxx
P.S Remember - what goes around comes around - be nice at ALL times!
P.P.S This video really IS better than porn! I'm loving it!!!!!!
P.P.P.S It's not really my place to say anything at all but since it is the 11th September today I thought I should just say that my thoughts are with all the victims' families and I hope that they are all doing ok. Lots of love and my deepest sympathies. Try to keep smiling x x x x x x x x
Wonder who it could be!
Perhaps a Pole Rampant on a Bed of Chips With Burger Sauce?
Don't know, but from the front of the forum board,
...so possibly not
Is Friday night going to be party night then, to celebrate our new home whilst watching la Marsh on the All Star Talent Show? I'll bring the salad kebabs
Give it a few days of CARNAGE and this squeaky clean thread will feel as much at home as LylaPlum sleeping on Jodies pile of unwashed underwear on her manky bedroom floor COMEDY!!!!
*puts down her yoghurt and pushes it away slowly*
What d'you mean? I'm referring to the single longest thread i.e. the one with the most pages/posts.
*stares at aanddfan, clutches pearls, and asks the bouncers to do their job*
Yes, I realised that, sorry, what I meant was that with over four hundred and fifty thousand threads, chances are it's not been the longest
Although, of course, it might have been.
Don't think there's anywhere to check.