"You're probably wondering why you're here."

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cookie_365

23-04-2009

Traditionally the connection between the place the candidates get summoned to and what the task is actually about is as logical as the clues on 3-2-1 (youngsters: ask your mum and dad)

So I was a bit let down by having the ad task -which involves filming - launched at a cinema.

It seems that the production team are running a bit low on ideas so I though we could help them out by posting suggestions they could use.

I'd like to start the ball rolling with this:

You're probably wondering why you're here in this brothel. Well, sex for money is the oldest profession, and that's the theme for this week's task; old. You're going to be selling used motability scooters to pensioners.

Tern

23-04-2009

Originally Posted by cookie_365:
“You're probably wondering why you're here in this brothel. Well, sex for money is the oldest profession, and that's the theme for this week's task; old. You're going to be selling used motability scooters to pensioners.
”

Literally, LOL!

You're probably wondering why you're here at this sewage works. Well, recycling is an ever mnore important part of business in the environmentally concious times and that's the theme for thios weel's task. You've got to come up with an advert for a new business selling takeaway pie and mash over the internet.

Magic8Ball

23-04-2009

Originally Posted by cookie_365:
“It seems that the production team are running a bit low on ideas so I though we could help them out by posting suggestions they could use.”

Good idea.

Here's mine:

You're probably wondering why you're here in this supermarket. Well "Supermarket Sweep" was a television programme set in a supermarket, and it was hosted by Dale Winton. Dale also hosts "Through The Wall", and that's exactly what I want you to build - walls. You have to go door to door offering to build house extensions/garages for the general public.

Willie Wontie

23-04-2009

You're probably wondering why I'm meeting you at a heliport. Well, a helicopter is also called a chopper, and you might use a chopper for chopping wood. Wood is used to make paper, and paper is used to print books. I've got here a list of books - some are rare, some are commonplace. I want you to buy the books on this list as cheaply as possible. This task is all about using your buying skills to get the best deals. Nick and Margaret will be watching you to see who is best at wangling a deal. The one who comes back with the most books in the list, at the lowest price, will win, and of the losing team, one of you will be fired. Good luck, and I'll see you all tomorrow in the boardroom.

Magic8Ball

23-04-2009

You're probably wondering what you're doing here in Afghanistan? Well, this country is well known for it's poppy harvest, used in the production of illicit drugs. It's also infamous as the country of residence of international terrorist Osama BIN Laden, could that be a hint of Dusty BIN? Afghanistan has a lot of desert, and that's what I want you to make this week - I want you to make a variety of DESSERTS and sell them in a cake and pastry shop in Ealing.

Digital Sid

23-04-2009

Your probably wondering why your here? This is the world's largest condom factory, they make tens of thousands of condoms everyday, of all shapes and sizes. Condoms are made from latex, latex comes from plants. Plants are also used to source sap for chewing gum. Chewing gum as you know can be bought from an off license. For this week's task, each team will run an off license in the eastend.

dgembadgemba

23-04-2009

Your probably wondering why your here? In the Walkers factory. As you know walkers make crisps. Their main flavour is Ready Salted, which is commonly called "Plain". Plain Jane is an expression for a lady that is quite dawdy but Tarzans companion Jane was far from that. As you know Johnny Weismuller played Tarzan on the big screen and also swam in the olympics. The olympic logo has five rings and thats why your task this week is to design a ring for cockney chavs

mouthalmighty

23-04-2009

Very funny.

Esqualita

23-04-2009

You're all probably wondering why you are here at the National Theatre. Well, the theatrical profession as you know is full of Drama Queens-the Queen lives in Buckingham Palace, which rhymes with phallus-which would be a good way to describe a Dildo. If you take the L out of Dildo you get Dido who sang about not going down with the Ship. And that's your task. Selling ships in bottles to passing trade in Portsmouth.

doingthedirty

23-04-2009

You're all probably wondering why you are here at White Hart Lane football stadium. Well, football is a game of two halves and two halves make a whole. Holes are the unique element of the popular mint Polo which is also the name of a game played on horses. As in "Only Fools and Horses" a classic programme on TV - the initals of my old mate Terry Venables.

Your task this week is to sell a load of Terry Venables merchandise - T-shirts, CDs, books and DVDs - to the general public for a profit. The team with the biggest profit wins and out of the losing team, one of you will get fired.

doingthedirty

23-04-2009

You're all probably wondering why we're in this tea shop.
Well, we all know that TB is a deadly disease.
But so is AIDS.
Band-Aids are what they call plasters in the USA where one of the states is New York.
Which was once New Amsterdam.
Which is named after the capital of the Netherlands.
Where the national colour is orange.
Jason Orange was in Take That and that is your task for this week:

To sell Boyzone tickets.

Duncan J

23-04-2009

You're probably wondering why you're here at the City of Manchester Stadium. Well, this is the home of Manchester City Football Club, supported by Noel and Liam Gallagher out of Oasis. The rival band to Oasis in the 90s were Blur, and blur is what happens to your vision when you need glasses. But glasses can also be something you drink out of, for example, lager. Lager is often drunk in large quantities before a football match. An example of a football team is Manchester City, who happen to play here at the City of Manchester stadium.

So your task for this week is to design a new strip for Manchester City F.C.

Digital Sid

23-04-2009

Originally Posted by Duncan J:
“You're probably wondering why you're here at the City of Manchester Stadium. Well, this is the home of Manchester City Football Club, supported by Noel and Liam Gallagher out of Oasis. The rival band to Oasis in the 90s were Blur, and blur is what happens to your vision when you need glasses. But glasses can also be something you drink out of, for example, lager. Lager is often drunk in large quantities before a football match. An example of a football team is Manchester City, who happen to play here at the City of Manchester stadium.

So your task for this week is to design a new strip for Manchester City F.C. ”

But those two are too closely linked. The point that's being made is that the location they start the task rarely has anythng to do with the task.

E.g. in series 1, episode 1 they sold flowers, but they were taken to a printing press where the produce newspapers to be told this.

Duncan J

23-04-2009

Originally Posted by Digital Sid:
“But those two are too closely linked. The point that's being made is that the location they start the task rarely has anythng to do with the task.

E.g. in series 1, episode 1 they sold flowers, but they were taken to a printing press where the produce newspapers to be told this.”

It's just a twist on the OP's idea - going through a convoluted set of connections only to come back to the original location.

Psycho_Kitty

24-04-2009

LOL at these.

superboy

24-04-2009

You're probably wondering why you're here, and so am I, the producers have managed to recruit a team of complete idiots!

rob1973

24-04-2009

Originally Posted by superboy:
“You're probably wondering why you're here, and so am I, the producers have managed to recruit a team of complete idiots!”

GENIUS!!!

You're probably wondering why we're at Hackney Re-cycling center. Well as we all know 'green' issues are very important today.
Kids these days call halluciagenic skunk weed green so your task is to go and sell as many drugs to hoodies in Brixton as you can. The team that comes back with the most money and least stab wounds wins. The team that loses will be back in the boardroom and one of you will get knifed!

WinterFire

24-04-2009

You're probably wondering why you're here in a padded cell in an insane asylum with the door shut and me speaking to you through the public address system. It's because you've been appearing on television for five weeks now, and people have been watching you. And some of those people are health professionals. And some of those health professionals work in mental health. And some of those mental health professionals have concluded that you are all a menace to society and need to be locked up for the general publics' and your protection. You're all fired!

robbies_gal

24-04-2009

lol not good enought o make one up but carry on ive been killing myself here

Pretty Polly

24-04-2009

You're probably wondering why you're here, at the largest Tescos in Europe. Well, Tesco sells a lot of food, and another shop that sells food is the Co-op. If you take the hyphen out of Co-op, you get coop, and that's where hens live. Hens are a type of bird, another type of bird is a thrush. Thrush is an illness, if you're ill you might go to hospital. 'Hoss pittle' could be a way someone might refer to equine urine, your task this week is to design and sell nappies for horses.

annies1

24-04-2009

Originally Posted by doingthedirty:
“You're all probably wondering why we're in this tea shop.
Well, we all know that TB is a deadly disease.
But so is AIDS.
Band-Aids are what they call plasters in the USA where one of the states is New York.
Which was once New Amsterdam.
Which is named after the capital of the Netherlands.
Where the national colour is orange.
Jason Orange was in Take That and that is your task for this week:

To sell Boyzone tickets.”

Originally Posted by Pretty Polly:
“You're probably wondering why you're here, at the largest Tescos in Europe. Well, Tesco sells a lot of food, and another shop that sells food is the Co-op. If you take the hyphen out of Co-op, you get coop, and that's where hens live. Hens are a type of bird, another type of bird is a thrush. Thrush is an illness, if you're ill you might go to hospital. 'Hoss pittle' could be a way someone might refer to equine urine, your task this week is to design and sell nappies for horses.”

Brilliant - absolutely loving all these.

isopap

24-04-2009

Inspired idea for a thread, it's really made me laugh. Here is my attempt

You're probably wondering why I've brought you here to this school. At school you get an education, I didn't need no education, which is a line from the pink floyd song "another brick in the wall", wall rhymes with ball, you use a ball when you play golf, in golf you can get a birdie. Therefore in this task I'd like you to design a fashion range for budgies

spacecadet77

24-04-2009

Sarcasm Alert!

You're probably wondering why I've brought you to this Amstrad factory. Quality electronic products are now a major market....

WinterFire

24-04-2009

You're probably wondering why I've brought you to the surface of Titan, one of Saturn's moons. Titan has an ammonia atmosphere. Ammonia is commonly used in cleaning products and ...

BigGayL

24-04-2009

I actually think this is the best one - perhaps Digital Sid doesn't appreciate the spin on it, but I did!

They're all great BTW - keep them coming!

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