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DS Crisis Support Group? (Part 5)


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Old 23-06-2013, 12:56
sallygill1961
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Think I messaged you on fb
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Old 23-06-2013, 13:08
duffsdad
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Hi Jane


Writing is good for venting your frustrations and I hope this time next year you can read what you wrote and be proud of how far you've came. I am so blown away by the strength in your posts. But I'm not sure you see it. For example saying you feel alone but dont know if it's him or a relationship you miss shows that you have perspective on what's happening but that maybe as your confidence is shot you dont see that in yourself.

I'm LOL'ing at your "crazy mindset". That's how I describe my panic. I haven't slept since Friday and I feel this terror start in my stomach and move up til sometimes I cant breathe. And the ridiculous thing is I dont even know why. I say I'm not going to let things bother me or I'm not going to think about them and then bang there it is and wont go away. And then I start obsessing and my OCD flares up and things become unmanageable. I always look at people who let things just wash over them and think why cant that be me, why dont I cope? And I go round in circles.
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Old 23-06-2013, 22:13
jane-hen12
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Hi Jane


Writing is good for venting your frustrations and I hope this time next year you can read what you wrote and be proud of how far you've came. I am so blown away by the strength in your posts. But I'm not sure you see it. For example saying you feel alone but dont know if it's him or a relationship you miss shows that you have perspective on what's happening but that maybe as your confidence is shot you dont see that in yourself.

I'm LOL'ing at your "crazy mindset". That's how I describe my panic. I haven't slept since Friday and I feel this terror start in my stomach and move up til sometimes I cant breathe. And the ridiculous thing is I dont even know why. I say I'm not going to let things bother me or I'm not going to think about them and then bang there it is and wont go away. And then I start obsessing and my OCD flares up and things become unmanageable. I always look at people who let things just wash over them and think why cant that be me, why dont I cope? And I go round in circles.
BiB just summed me up as well. I don't understand why I don't seem able to just get on with life the way everyone else does. As soon as I'm out of that mindset, I'm just like okay why did I think that.

The top part of this post made me tear up. My confidence is massively down now, and tbh it wasn't really there to begin with..Fake it til you make it I guess..
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Old 27-06-2013, 01:15
jane-hen12
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Sorry guys its me again. I must be pissing you all off.

I think one of my friends is pissed at me (posting a status that is very likely to be about me, i've asked them but they've not replied) saying how can you miss someone then avoid them.
I said I wanted to see her, but shes just moved in with her boyf and her only reply was 'i live in x now'
which came across to me as its too much effort to come see you. i have no way of getting to that place, which is only a short drive, just i dont drive..she does.

its just made me feel even worse about everything
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Old 25-07-2013, 08:21
tarihelyanwe
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Hi everyone

I'm generally just a lurker on these forums but I feel like I need some advice, so i hope i'm not intruding here, it seemed like the best place to ask on this thread rather than starting my own.

Basically i have been with my partner for 4 years, we have been engaged and living together for the last three in a small one bedroom flat (and when I say one bedroom i mean its an open plan kitchen/living room with the bedroom on a mezzanine level, so we are always in the same room) Anyway thats beside the point other than to stress that we know each other very well and are very close.

Yesterday he told me he was bi. He said he has never done anything with a man (which i believe, I am only the second person he has ever been with, we're both 27) But he said he used to watch gay porn about 50% of the time and straight the rest. Its obviously come as a massive shock to me and I feel like I dont know who he is anymore. But i know that will fade and I'm ok with him being bi.

What worrys me is that he says he does want to do it with a man, but he wouldn't because he is with me. I am concerned that down the line 10/20 years from now he could get to a point where he just really wants to see what its like and leave me so that he can experience the things he wants to experience.

He said that he doesn't think he would feel like that but he cant guarentee it. Should i stick by him or not? any advice would be gratefully recieved
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Old 25-07-2013, 09:21
jane-hen12
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I'd stick by him. I know its come as a massive shock, and to be honest he could have told you much sooner, but you've still got a lot of shared history.

(recently hurt cynic in me is about to escape) any relationship can end for a number of reasons, and okay this may be an extra one, but that doesn't mean it will. He hasn't wanted to while he's been with you, and has even said himself its unlikely.

I'm not sure how much help any of that will be haha
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Old 28-07-2013, 20:32
hotmat3k
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I'd stick by him. I know its come as a massive shock, and to be honest he could have told you much sooner, but you've still got a lot of shared history.

(recently hurt cynic in me is about to escape) any relationship can end for a number of reasons, and okay this may be an extra one, but that doesn't mean it will. He hasn't wanted to while he's been with you, and has even said himself its unlikely.

I'm not sure how much help any of that will be haha
I'd say the same, but make sure you do things based on how you feel rather than jump to conclusions. It's not surprising you're feeling shocked, but the one most important thing; he's been honest. He's probably prepared before telling you that he may push you away because of it.

However, if you trust him; then stick by him. By telling you, he's stripped away any ultimate curiosity and risking going behind your back if you continue to discuss and work through it. It's his sexuality, not a disease. If you love him for him, then what he's told you shouldn't make any difference.
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Old 30-08-2013, 16:03
Jason100
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I have red hollow spots on my hands. Five on my left and two on my right. They've been there since January. I've tried germolene on them but they've not cleared. Are they warts? They don't hurt when i poke/touch them. They just feel hollow.
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Old 31-08-2013, 01:04
Muze
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Upstairs neighbour is going ape****!!

Actually a bit scared, he's deliberately banging on walls and floors and shouting out of the window... no idea what's happened
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Old 31-08-2013, 01:12
sallygill1961
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At this time of night I'd dial 999
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Old 31-08-2013, 17:41
Muze
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He calmed down in the end, but it's a worry now, hopefully he just drunk and had bad news or something - I haven't got the energy for neighbourhood feuds any more.

He's been trouble before, he spits out of his wondow and in runs down my windows *gross* and flicks his dog ends out of the window but I've been pretty patient and he's only young.
Just feels like he wants to cause trouble *sigh*... youth surely is wasted on the young
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Old 26-09-2013, 14:42
marc822
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Im coming off citalopram and i feel awful, its like i am craving for the drug almost similar to giving up the fags. trying to stay level headed and not get depressed again that i want to kill myself. dont want to go back to how i was in june.
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Old 26-09-2013, 14:45
jane-hen12
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Have you been slowly reducing the dose or have you just come off it yourself? are you under medical supervision?
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Old 26-09-2013, 14:47
marc822
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Yes im under medical supervision, been halving the dosage as advised, but that depression feeling feels like its on the edge and dont want it to come back.
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Old 26-09-2013, 15:08
jane-hen12
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At least you're aware its there though, I've found that to be half the battle (now I can tell its coming its easier to avoid slipping)

I know its gonna sound really cliche, but try and keep yourself busy and distracted. Don't focus on the fear that will make everything seem worse. Is there anything you really enjoy doing you could throw yourself into?

I was quite lucky with my withdrawal, although I came off pretty quickly after they were making me sleep 14-15 hours a day.
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Old 26-09-2013, 15:41
marc822
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Thats the problem too much sleep. Plus all the things that have happened to me in the past year and a half are now well and truly over, im in a better place now and dont have that distraction anymore.
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Old 26-09-2013, 16:37
jane-hen12
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Eugh I really struggled with the too much sleep thing, being a student meant I didn't even need to get up for anything. Try and get yourself into a routine of getting up, it'll be hard but helps eventually.
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Old 16-11-2013, 00:25
lilly_jones
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I'm not too sure what this thread is for, just general support?

Anyway.

You all seem like a supportive bunch so thought here might be a good place to let off some steam.

I'm having a hard time tonight, I'm on night 5 of starting SSRI's for anxiety and depression, and I have really bad side effects, negative thoughts, self harm etc. But I'm working on it.

I had a therapy session today, which was okay. I had to fork out £10 for a taxi there and back just to force myself out of the house, finding it hard and harder to get out atm. Its really effecting my uni work, I'm so so behind. I just feel like I'm making a mess of it all.

Lifes not too great really....
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Old 16-11-2013, 08:42
sallygill1961
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What medications are you on Lilly x the thread isn't used much but I will pop in when I can x
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Old 16-11-2013, 10:13
lilly_jones
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Just 20mg Citalopram, I get bad akasthesia with it at times, but reviewing my se of it on Monday with the doc thankfully. Thanks (:
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Old 16-11-2013, 23:23
sallygill1961
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hi lilly it may not be the right one its not unusual to have to try 2 or 3 also some take 4 to 6 weeks before you notice a difference
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Old 18-11-2013, 03:56
Mizzharrumph
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Hi lilly,

I'm on a different drug, venlafaxine, but my experience is that it does take 4 to 6 weeks to progress out if of the side effects. For me, there are some residual sensations that remain, some mild jerking, mild tremor...but everyone's different.

First things first, you have to get yourself better, I know you are worried about uni, but be aware you need to do some self-care and that may mean spinning a few less plates for a while. I don't mean give things up, but seek advice about how to manage things, communicate difficulties in confidence to tutors. Most uni's have a counselling service, because although you may not feel it, many, many of your fellow students are going through their own similar, but unique health issues.

n.b. I dont subscribe to the term mental health, I think it's misleading. My brain, your brain,... have developed a malfunction, there's some imbalances in the neurological chemistry, re-addressed by medicine. The brain is a physical organ, like skin, heart, kidneys...

Break the tasks you have to just get you safely through the day into smaller tasks. Don't be afraid to be specific. Going to shop is a series of small doable steps, but it may seem overwhelming unless you sequence it out.

Be kind and patient with yourself. There are studies that show many drugs are up to 80% placebo effect...meaning we heal ourselves before the drug even kicks in. Of course, the drug treats the condition, but it's the self care, self-acknowledgement of our illness, whatever it may be, and our proactive responses that can enhance the healing.

So keep going, seek support, get as much nature as you can, I find being creative helps, crafts, drawing, anything that relaxes and promotes mindfulness. Does it get easier....yes,

look for a video on you tube called

'I had a black dog, his name was depression'

Its an animation of the very best book on depression I've ever read, same title. It's a picture book, and you will really find comfort in it, even during your worst moments. The artist/author has managed his own depression, and his drawings describe so accurately what it is like to experience with it......go take a look.

well, I hope you take it, moment by moment, and I wish you all the best...
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Old 18-11-2013, 22:27
lilly_jones
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Tonight's horrific. Going so slowly. Feeling the lowest of the low.... I've written a note in case I decide to leave tonight, just need to work out how.

Some people have told me to get to a hospital, but I don't want the fuss. Plus, I don't think I'd be taken seriously as I haven't actually DONE anything yet......
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Old 18-11-2013, 22:30
sallygill1961
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Lilly you need to go to hospital now before you do something ok ring nhs direct do you have the number
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Old 18-11-2013, 22:33
sallygill1961
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Dial 111 it's free from any phone
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