Are you gay Beth?

I'm not really a regular on here, but I'm going through a hard time at the moment

Hello all, back again. What can I say - blimmin computers!

Thanks for the advice Purdy, I have been on the website today, but in the meantime I have started stripping wallpaper and discovered a huge hole in the wall, looks like someone just hit it with a sledgehammer. I filled it with cement, and will finish it off properly tomorrow. Think I shall try things myself till I really have to get a fitter in - who knows, I may even do it all myself You never know what you can do till you try, a year ago I thought I'd fall apart and look at me now.

Owlie, sorry you have been down in the dumps, hope by now you are feeling a bit brighter. Being in pain all the time must be really draining, all that and job hunting too. I'll have everything crossed for your interview tomorrow. well done on getting so far so quickly. Even if you decide this is not the job for you, you know you have skills people want and you can take it short term. Having a wedding to plan will be so exciting, keep buying the bridal magazines and put a scrap book together of all the best ideas.

Lorry, I know what you mean about missing out on the full mother of the bride experience, my middle daughter lived with her bloke so lomg they decided to just go get the piece of paper and then sent us all cards to say they were married. Not the way we thought it would be when they were little, was it The B & B sounds like hard work, but I bet you could write a book

Cooee Lissie, nice to see you, hope the course is going well and you are doing OK.

Sooty, not long now, make sure you take time to enjoy the day, it will all go by fast so savour the moments.

Quick wave to Beth, and hi to tiger, for all who need cheering - Lindt choccy eggs all round,
Polly xx

Hi everyone

Just popping in to spread my coughs and sneezes

Owlie How did you get on on Wednesday???

I'll post more wedding pics in a min!! I LOVE your flower girl dresses

My cake is here http://www.onefinedayweddingservices.com/cakes.php Nikki at the top left

It will have blue ribbon instead of tartan and a thistle and a rose on top of the mini cakes and will be sprinkled with diamontaes, the bottom layer will be fruit, the mini cakes are a mix of sponge and chocolate, the next layer is chocolate and instead of the top layer we are having our cake topper. Which is this http://www.weddingcollectibles.com/i...inderella1.jpg which is what we spent all our dollars on in florida last year!!

Feeling a lot happier now

Sooty

Love the cake. Best bit of the wedding! Well almost I Have missed the date of your wedding. When is it ???
Long time no speak. No choccies

I am having a bad time at the moment. Post operation pains are really bad at the moment. Been doing too much walking. It is a difficult choice. I have to walk to help the healing. Then I have the pain. I can't win. Unfortunately it is still over 18 months to go before my healing is hopefully complete. Or rather as far as it going to heal. On a positive note , it is still less pain than before the OP. Well different shall I say. I am going to my G.P. for a pain review next week.

I can't write to every body at the moment. So tired I wont make much sense. I will pop in every now and again.

Petexxx

We'll, Im "bi", but heading very much towards gay - the thought of guys makes me feel a bit sick, doing stuff, I mean

What's up, anything I can try help with?

Hope you feel comfortable, I tend to think sexually is fluid and don't label myself any more.

I'm just finding it hard not to self harm at the moment. How are you getting on with that? How is 6th form?

Evening folks

Can't stop right now as off to bed. Been at my sister's tonight so not had time to pop on.

Interview went well yesterday but it was difficult and so was the role play. Anyway they said I would hear something today or Tuesday.....

Got a call this morning to say I've got the job I start on 14th April

I'll be on tomorrow later on to let you know all about it and to catch up with you all

Feeling really proud of myself (for a change) as I've applied for one job, had one interview and got the job! Not bad going to say how many people are struggling to get jobs!!!!!!!!!

Magnetic - 6th form is hard and horrible, but I finish on may 15th, have a month off (apart from 3 days for exams), and then don't go back til end of June . I'm 14 weeks free today, self harm wise, my best friend has been amazing, and I sent her a cute message saying how much I value her and how much shes done for me, and thank you, etc , and we had a cute chat today, which is good . I'm making a scrapbook of sweet messages/.texts from people, so I know people care, so I can read them when I'm upset,

Stay strong, you can do it

Angel - WELL DONE on the job!! . Hope it all goes well!

CONGRATULATIONS Well done, they must have been impressed by you, didn't even need till Tuesday to decide you were just what they wanted. When do you start?

Sooty, that cake was gorgeous, how clever to include chocolate, and the cake top figures just perfect. Not long now, how is the shoe practice going?

Just been told today that I’m a selfish nasty person. That I have no sympathy for anyone and that basically I’m a waste of space. And you know what I know that person is right. I’m no good to anyone. I have a crap life and a crap job. I’m jealous of my friends because they have lives. They have husbands and kids and a normal life. I have a dead end job and still live with my parents. I only ever go out with my mum and at work I’m just a joke. I’m sure everyone laughs at me behind my back and why wouldn’t they, after all there is so much to laugh at.
Not sure what else to say, that just about sums it all up really.

Owlie - I'm so proud of you!!!! Is it permanent this time? Hope so, but whatever, very well done and good luck in your new job.

Lissie, believe me I've been in a similar 'place' as you and I understand how you feel, so have a big ((((hug)))) from me. The day came when I had to start believing that somebody else's opinion was just that - just an opinion, and for every person that thinks you're useless there are lots more that admire qualities in you that you might not be able to acknowledge right now. So why is it that we are so willing to accept the negative opinions and don't look for, or acknowledge, the compliments?

And before you protest, be really honest - I BET you get compliments as well as the negative comments. Has anybody told you recently that your hair looked nice and shiny, or you have a lovely smile, or you did a good job, or thanked you for a kindness, no matter how small? If you're anything like me you only remember the bad things and don't allow yourself the 'indulgence' of enjoying the nice things.

The biggest lesson I learned in life was that only I could change things for myself. It's hard work but you really can improve your self-esteem if you try. Here's some of the things I did: when somebody says something nice to you, try to enjoy the moment even if your instinct is to deny it to yourself. Allow yourself to believe what they said and take a bit of pleasure from it. And when somebody says something negative, instead of beating yourself up and dwelling on it, try to think "it's just their opinion and it's no more important than the compliment I got from 'x' the other day."

Be realistic and honest. Is what they're saying absolute rubbish or could it have any real basis even in a small sense? If so how can you change things, if by doing so you could end up happier?

I'm no psychoanalyst but I have worked on my self-esteem issues for years and for the most part I'm a much happier person now than before, so these things worked for me.

Hope something of that helps because it really saddens me seeing you being so hard on yourself.

lorry x

Can I join in here please? Need to talk to people without being out there. If you know what I mean You all sound very nice people though

of course you can i won't be around long tonight tho x

thank you sally. Nighty night x

thers usually someone lurking most times on here x

Hi all. Just thought I'd share a little about me and ask for some advice and help. I'm 20 and suffer from PTSD(post traumatic stress disorder) and depression.

2nd Dec 2008 I was walking home from the gym with my cousin and was viciously attacked, eventually blacked out and avoided being stabbed. My cousin saved my life that night and in doing so was badly beaten herself while I lay unconscious and taking kicks to the head.

So that was how I got it. I have crippling anxiety and don't leave the house much and if I do it's in the car with a family member(example would be to see GP etc)

I see a Psychiatrist and am due to see her next friday. I thought I'd share some of my diary from last night. If any of you have any ideas or advice I'd appreciate it.


Sorry for such a long post.

I'm not sure if I can be of any help to you but you most definitly need to talk this over with your doctor, I know it can be a bit frustrating when you get a stand in because you are used to the other person and don't feel like you can open up perhaps you could try and find a friend (it can be a surprise how supportive some friends can be given the chance) or come onto this forum and offload to them or us lot on here that way even if your doctor changes you still have the one steady outlet that doesn't change.

Are you on medication? I know any time I've been to the doctors they just try and stick me on pills if you don't want to put on medication make it clear and set up another plan to help you. I know you don't seem keen on the home visits but in my experience they benefitted me a lot more than going to the doctors, the nurse just seemed to understand me more and have more of a connection, perhaps it was down to the environment who knows but give it a try you never know!

Your mums problem is not your fault the best you can do is support her and be there for her, she's the parent remember not you, as much as you think you are a burden on your family and friends you're not. Don't get into the trap of thinking they'd be better off without because they wouldn't, you'd be making their lives worse if you decided to end it or leave. You don't want to burden them with the guilt of knowing they didn't do enough to help or realise your pain, just open up to them
you may be pleasantly surprised by their reactions and support.

I hope things work out for you, I'm rubbish at sleeping too and would have the same feelings when I wake up in the middle of the night like you have described, try exercising during the day or going somewhere you know is safe and very public for a run, tire yourself out, try and eat well, and then go to bed at a good
hour try and relax before hand to get te best possible sleep, the home visits should help with relaxation techniques another plus about them! You've got to want to change and get help no one but yourself can do it for you they can only help! xx

Hey, dunno if this is the right place, just need to vent a little bit at people who I don't know in real life, is that alright...?

yeah vent away

I really really REALLY dislike my future mother in law.

Sorry everyone, realise your not all in a great place and I don't have the emotional strength to help but I just need to get that out.....

Shes a cow!!!! Grrrrrrrrrr!

Anyway, I'll now go back to being a sane, normal, nice person whos getting married on Saturday!!!

OMG Sooty it had completely passed me by that your wedding was so soon! ( it's my age)

I wish you every happiness (despite your future MIL who I hope will improve in time) and I hope you have the most wonderful day on Saturday!

lorry x

Sooty, have a wonderful wedding , enjoy every minute of it, and try to avoid the MIL as much as possible so that all your memories of the day are good ones.
Treat yourself to some chocolate for now, and a nice cud of grass for the mother in law.
love Polly xx

Good luck Sooty. Just remember, its your day, make sure you enjoy it!!!!!

Lorry

We all have our share of Senior moments. I am the butt of most of the family for mine. Now, whats my wife,s name? I am not exactly joking here