I wonder if she'll think of a different way to say "you need to sort out your arms/hands" this week

She can use any grammar she wants if she can just think of anything else to say.

For me, "funness" comes under "towards more colourful speech" or "dammit I can't think of the word I want but this covers my meaning" - both unobjectionable, even admirable.

But "I were" and "you was", especially in that slaggy tone Alesha is using, are grating and inexcusable.
parthena

I don't catch your drift, sorry. What is a slaggy tone? Estuary?

It really does not bother me what tone/accentshe uses. It is the "you was".

The world now has a new language - it is a phenomena that has been sweeping the Nation. As Louis Walsh would say, "Everyone is talking about it" and it is not Jedward - it is Dixonese.

It is quite easy to learn - "you was like a princess" is a good springboard to master the new phraseology - new words will be added to the OED - such as funness - example: "You was bringing the funness into the jive". To speak Dixonese fluently you must forget everything you learnt at school when you was learning your ABC and 123. The language of Shakespeare is dead - forget any flowery language - keep it simple and I mean simple. Remember it is NOT you were (so dated and last century) it is you was, they was - oh Dixonese has such a funness and comicness about it.

To see this amazing language in action tune to BBC1 7.00 on Saturday and receive a Masterclass from The World Authority - no-one can speak it quite like her.

ugh she cant sing
all shouty and flat on CIN
....

LOL! Excellent!

And is the bit in bold samiskimese? (A phenomenon )

Don't forget that last week we had freeness as well as funness. (Although I think freeness is actually a word, it struck me as odd at the time.)

As is 'slaggy.'

i'm sorry to correct you, but in london english, which is what alesha speaks, you WAS is correct and you were would be wrong. alesha doesn't speak standard english.

in london english and cockney, the latter of which is a fully-fledged dialect, you was is correct and you were is wrong. just like in northern english "he were" is correct and "he was" would be wrong.

are you suggesting she change her dialect just because she's on bbc one? that would be classist and racist (and btw, i'm white and a native speaker of standard english)

and to those who say she doesn't speak the language of shakespeare, shakespeare regularly uses double negatives, double superlatives like "This was the most unkindest cut of all" (from Julius Caeasar) or "wrong" verb forms (for instance using the plural form with a singular and vice versa) - so what are you suggesting, exactly?

What standard English do you speak?

I cannot speak for Londoners but 'he were' is most certainly not correct in the north!

It is actually you being racist and class prejudiced (I don't think there is such a word as classist) in implying that incorrect grammar is confined to class or skin colour. Many non whites and those from a working class background speak impeccable English.

I have defended Alesha ferociously on this thread - but you was can never be defined as correct English grammar.

And on Children in Need after they've just announced the latest total of £18,800,000+ we've been informed by Miss D that this total leaves us "....slightly under where we was last year".

OMG, this thread cracks me up! Glad to know am not the only one bothered by her wrong grammar. I wish she'd at least try to improve on it...

Leave Alesha alone! The racist comments people have made about Alesha on this thread are revolting! How dare you associate her with yardies, ganstas and knife crime just because she's black.

A lot of the critcism of Alesha being a judge on Strictly is valid, but being racist towards her is not acceptable.

My post turned up twice for some reason.

I doubt most people on here are being racist. Bad grammar transcends race and they are annoyed with her because of that (as are I) . It has nothing to do with the colour of her skin.

It is racist to associate her with yardies, ganstas and knife crime. I am not afraid to speak out.

http://books.google.com/books?id=mtd...gbs_navlinks_s

Just sayin'. There are bazillions of varieties of English.

Um... also, although I realise I'm in danger of going off topic, and don't have the time to a quick bit of research to check I'm not talking tat, but...

Most of you probably know that many European languages have both singular and plural (or formal singular) words for 'you'. So in French, it's tu and vous. In Middle English, thee was the equivalent of tu. But modern English, for some reason, has only retained you for both French words tu and vous.

I am pretty sure that in SOME, old and obsolete cases, 'you was' would have been correct. It would have been the correct verb conjugation for formal singular.

I've no idea how London English evolved, but I think you'll find some regional speech patterns retain old forms of speech/grammar, rather than misusing new ones. So you kinda have to think back to front about it, if that makes sense. I think 'you was' is a hangover from days long gone in many cases.

Of course - samiskimese is very difficult to learn and it takes a lifetime to master but phenomena is a word that appears in my Collins dictionary so I think that is English. Backslang and double Backslang is as difficult as Chinese to learn. This is where Dixonese comes into its own as it is so very simple and the dropping of h's, laziness in speech, calling everybody darlin and my love (when you don't love them at all) is to be encouraged.

It gets more fascinating week by week - it takes English words, twists the grammar and breaks every rule. I think by December everyone will have mastered it and therefore the inventor of Dixonese will not need to come on television's Strictly to give a refresher course.

Shakespeare had poetic licence - there is nothing poetic about Miss Dixon's vowel sounds - and if she is paid X amount of money to put her views across at least she could master the fundamentals of grammar and try not to sound like a common guttersnipe. To put it in song: "Why can't the English teach their children how to speak, the Norwegians speak Norwegian and the Greeks they speak their Greek etc.

It's simple. We have different speech registers.
I speak to my small grandson in a way that I would not use when giving evidence in court.

If I were a judge on TV I would attempt to use a more elaborate register than if I were twittering.

Sadly for Alesha, she is either not aware that fluent speakers adapt their speech to circumstance or she simply has insufficient skills. Karen Hardy (just one example) both knows her stuff technically and is able to converse clearly.

I am not sure what 'London English' is but I should imagine that having lived in something described as 'London' all my life I should have encountered a bit of it. More so than Ms Dixon who is from Welwyn Garden City in Hertfordshire. 'You was' can be heard a lot, and I am sure I use it myself on occasions, but it is highly dependent on the background and upbringing of the speaker and I have never heard anyone describe it as 'correct' before. Indeed in my experience anyone habitually using 'you was' would actually accept it was bad grammar and it certainly wouldn't be taught in schools.

Applauds your heroic dedication to samiskimese

Yes... but it is the plural of phenomenon.

I also hate that patronising thing of calling people "my love".