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Old 23-11-2009, 18:05
Faria262
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My Friend texted me one last night whih promped me to start/ this thread. It is about Jedward - I have to admit I have warmed to them ver tme, but you have to have a sense of humour, especially on DS. I also made up a joke about Lloyd, who I am not a fan of but I know others are - no real offence meant - you can actually apply either joe to whoever you want!

Any/way

Billy is stuck in traffic on the M2 Motorway into Belfast, when anohr man knocks on the window of his car. Billy asks what's going on and is told that terrorists have kidnapped Jedward and are asking for 310 million or they will pour petrol over the twins and burn them The man explains that he isgoing from car to car andthey are having a acllecion. "How much are people donating?" Billy asks.

the other man replies, "About a gallon!"

My Lloyd one is not an oriinal, nd might not appeal to his fans, but it's not quite as evil as the first lol

What is the difference between Lloyd's singing and a pancake?

Pancakes are meant to be flat


Anyone got any more jokes?

XXXX
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Old 23-11-2009, 18:20
Menk
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'Twins dressed in PVC do Britney Spears.'

What a big disappointment that video was.
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Old 23-11-2009, 22:14
Faria262
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Lol! I'm sure they'd agree when you put it like that

xxxx
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Old 23-11-2009, 22:21
Mr Blonde
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http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscart.../bgrn1615l.jpg
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Old 23-11-2009, 22:47
Faria262
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Lol thanks for that Mr Blonde! ;0

xxxx
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Old 23-11-2009, 22:56
myoldmate
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Here's a good one.

Lloyd wasn't in the bottom two.
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Old 23-11-2009, 23:40
~Jane~
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Here's a good one.

Lloyd wasn't in the bottom two.
You beat me to it!
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Old 23-11-2009, 23:48
Faria262
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Here's a good one.

Lloyd wasn't in the bottom two.

Lloyd getting to boot camp at all was a joke in my eyes!

This one randomly came into my head....

Why was Rikki eliminated so soon?
Th show ws not high brow enough for him

Lol I actually really like Rikki and don't have a probem with his eyebrow...

xxxx
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Old 23-11-2009, 23:53
lovecat86
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Here's a good one.

Lloyd wasn't in the bottom two.
That's the funniest one yet.

I did quite like that twins one too, despite being a HUGE fan of the twins. I'd get my mate Banana Man to save em in the nick of time.
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Old 23-11-2009, 23:55
xenosys
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I hear you can now buy an "X Factor Winners" doll. You switch it on and it sings one song, then does nothing for 10 years.

---------------------

I'm A Celebrity and The X Factor.

Both having their ratings boosted by a ridiculous pair of t*ts.
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:04
Faria262
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Lol loving all these, keep themm coming guys!


lovecat, you could always have someone else (Lloyd, Danyl, Simon...anyone really!) kdnapped, the joke still works

xxxx
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:07
myoldmate
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Lloyd getting to boot camp at all was a joke in my eyes!

This one randomly came into my head....

Why was Rikki eliminated so soon?
Th show ws not high brow enough for him

Lol I actually really like Rikki and don't have a probem with his eyebrow...

xxxx
Ahaaaaaahaa!
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:10
xenosys
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The week after losing Lucie Jones :

Danni Minogue just said on X-Factor I lost my first act last week and I don't want it to happen again this week. Numpty, how can you lose your first act twice?

Been browsing through sickipedia
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:12
DuckSeason
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So Louis thinks Lloyd Daniels would be better off in a boyband. Funny that, there's a vacancy going...

The X Factor contestants are ruining Queen's songs. Roger Taylor probably doesn't mind, but I think Brian May.
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:14
Faria262
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Glad you like the Rikki one myoldmate, i made it up - I like it because I actually kind of live it, brow pun aside! If the show didn't value controversy/appearance so highy i reckon he would have lasted a while

And an old favourite of mine, whiich I also made up!

What is the differ/ence between Bob the Builder, Jimmy Saville and Simon Cowell?

Simon won't admit that he can and will fix it

This is such fun!

xxxx
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:19
sandydee
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I woke up in the hospital the other day and the doctor said, "I've got some good news and bad news."

"What's the bad news?" I asked.

"You've been in a car crash and you're paralysed from the waist down. Your girlfriend died on impact and your son is in a coma showing no response."

"Blimey that is bad news!" I said. "What's the good?"

"You're favourite to win x factor next year."
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:22
Faria262
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Lol sandydee!

xxxx
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:27
bluerose15
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Well I've been watching X factor and after a few years the same clean cut people with the same styled looks keep coming back and they are all starting to look the same to me.

Anyone else thinking Eoghan Quigg must've gone away, had plastic surgery and came back under the alias of lloyd daniels?

Ok maybe not.

Probably about as likely that Leona Lewis went away, had a stroke, got pissed up on white lightning, red bull and amphetamines and came back as Stacy Solomon.


not mine sickipedia...
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:32
ForerroRocher
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The week after losing Lucie Jones :

Danni Minogue just said on X-Factor I lost my first act last week and I don't want it to happen again this week. Numpty, how can you lose your first act twice?

Been browsing through sickipedia


I actually LOL'd.

I very rarely actually do LOL.
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Old 24-11-2009, 00:33
xenosys
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I actually LOL'd.

I very rarely actually do LOL.
Check out sickipedia, it's a very very dark place
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Old 24-11-2009, 01:15
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As I sat there watching x factor, I couldn't help but think Whitney Houston was a bit like her dress....off her tits!
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Old 24-11-2009, 01:16
kyri
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Here's an even better one...


Lloyd.
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Old 24-11-2009, 01:22
yawalloper
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So I saw John and Edward finally got kicked out of x factor.
Message to the Irish - dont even think about asking for a replay.
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Old 24-11-2009, 01:26
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I was just watching The x factor with the wife when Danyl Johnson commented that he'd read on Twitter that he was the most hated person since Hitler.

The wife commented "That's a bit strong."

Yes I thought" Hitler was never cocky....."
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Old 24-11-2009, 12:44
Faria262
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Lol I am loving these!

Why is it a waste of time buying Christmas prsents for Dannii Minogue?

She'll only moan about the (w)rapping!

What's the difference between Lloyd fans with hearing aids and Lloyd fans without hearing aids?

Those without are in denial....

xxxx
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