for the past week a cat has been hanging around my house. It keeps trying to come in and has started following my daughter around when she is out in the street. The cat belongs to a neighbour but seems to really want to come into our house. We have discouraged this cat completly as my son is extremely allergic to cats and dogs. Last night it sat in our garden looking in through the patio doors for ages - no joke. my daughter has even named the cat. i have told my daughter not to encourage it at all but she feels really sorry for it. it's really skinny and doesnt look too well cared for. Not really sure what advice i am looking for. i know i shouldnt feed the cat as this will just encourage it but i cant help worrying about it. We have also found out that the family it belongs to have another cat that it doesnt get on with so could this be the reason it has been hanging around?

Would it be possible to speak to the owner of the cat about this? See if their response is positive about the cat and go from there.

If the cats health (I.e weight, general conditon) is suffering because of the presense of the other cat in the household then it may be possible the owner has to make some decisions as soon as. Such as feeding her cats at different times, keeping their beddings etc in different rooms. Just so this cat is happier. As a last resort even consider rehoming.

In most cases I would say do not feed it and it will go home but that will not work. There are not many ideas I can think of apart from "Animal Rescue" who are snowed under with cats and other pets at this time of year. I can only ask that you keep the cat from going in to your house but provide a palce outside to sleep that is both warm and dry and feed it yourself and give water too. I ask this as an animal lover and yes it is a big step for you but the cat is not blame for what life has dealt it. If there is no help then the cat should be put down and saved from a life of pain, misery and suffering. It breaks my heart to say this but the truth is often this way.

I think Spiderpig is right. If you can afford it, there's sometimes cheap little plastic pet houses (a dog one would do) sold from cheaper household goods places such as Wilkinsons. Maybe could keep it on the edge of your garden so that it isn't near your son and put food n water in there and maybe a wrapped up brick heated in the oven for when it's cold. Cos it's not the poor cats fault. Gosh it breaks my heart to hear of this. I also agree with the previous poster, if your neighbours are okay non-aggressive types to talk to, have a word about what you're observing, as they may not be fully aware of it; perhaps they just think this cat wanders off somewhere having a good time and is naturally a bit thin.

Thanks for the advice. I will keep and eye on the cat to see what it does. Strangely since i posted this it has since disappeared. I will put some water out for it - my husband wilol have a fit if he sees me doing this though. If it takes the water and looks like it wants more then i will pick up some food and take it from there.

i really dont want to go down the route of encouraging this cat to become part of the family. but i cant at the same time see it going hungry.

I know what you mean and I sympathise.

I hope it's okay.

If you're firm the cat may stay put in any little house you get. In your shoes I'd give it a stroke n cuddle though when I saw it, the poor thing.

i am not exactly a cat lover though lol. i feel sorry for the wee thing but cats aren't my favourite animal sorry. This said it wont stop me looking out for it.

I do understand, as I'm not drawn to dogs at all (too energetic for me for a start) - but could never see one hungry or hurting without trying to help.

I had a sudden thought; have you thought about talking about this to other neighbours (not the owners)? If your hubby is going to be angry and your son is in danger of his allergies, then it would be more ideal if another neighbour than you would feed the cat.

Where I used to live there used to be a lady who looked after strays, (she married the man next door, moved in with him, and they used her old house as a pets home!); if there was anything wrong with a stray cat, people would just go to her. It's a pity there's not someone like that near you or maybe there is if you ask around?

good luck, I think you're very caring to be so concerned about this puss