Young Vic is so 'big' that the Sun'll
Never set on his gi-normous funnel
He's got a new job
They're using his knob
As a mould for the new channel tunnel

There was a bronzed buck called Jay
Who got his buns out every day
He loved to cock tease
And stripped off with ease
But would poor Dan get his lay?

There was a young girl named Kate Pinder,
Who turned nine grand into a cinder,
The money was burned,
By her pals she was spurned,
In a flash, hey presto, they binned her.

On the roundabout left were the girls
Although Marco still managed to hurl
Stu did a great job
Emma please shut you gob
Now all of their heads are a-twirl

YAY my 200th post
Last edited by hilary : 05-06-2004 at 21:36

Big Brother's best housemate was Stu,
Made himself one in the queue,
Stu's questions: quite easy,
While the girls were all queasy,
So now what's poor chicken to do?

Sorry to be naive, but what's a breek? lol

Scottish trousers.

A filthy old dirtbox Michelle
On Stuarts manhood she did tend to dwell
He said that he's clever
But then his old fella
Couldn't help but begin to swell

Dan spied Jasons arse straight away
And decided he wanted to play
With his anal canal
I bet poor Jason would yell
"God it hurts but it's yours for the day"

A coy little virgin Michelle
was put under big Stuarts spell
It wasn't his willy
that drove the girl silly
It was his A levels Oh Well

An ambitious young lady Michelle,
made young buck Stu's knob swell,
He was up for a licking, but she kept saying "chicken",
did they f**k, who could tell?

Gangsta wannabe Vic,
claimed to have an impressive dick,
obsessed with his 'thing'
and his child-like 'bling'
BB voters dubbed him '"thick".

The gangsta man Victor's quite shy,
So demure and reserved for a guy,
But he's caught in the crapper,
In a pose not so dapper,
Now he'll hide in the bedroom and cry.

A girl with a fetish for poo
has stirred up quite a to-do
She said it's brown and it's thick
And it isn't his dick
Oh what is poor Victor to do

Sorry people this is toilet humour at it's worst

Some say that Michelle is quite crass
She used to be a lard ass.
Claims she likes girls
But as the plot unfurls...
"Its not true!" claims her Nana Bass!

There was a young lady called Kitten,
Of her girlfriend she really was smitten.
Now she's over the press,
Not wearing a dress
But a cat-suit that's rather ill-fittin'.

The task for our mates is fast food,
What they fry up for us ain't so good,
Doing chips in a pan,
Are Stu, Jas and Dan,
But I wish Shell would cook in the nude.

There once was a girl from the Toon,
Who shagged poor old Stuart in June,
When July came around,
She regrettably found,
She'd pissed off her housemates too soon.

While he was taking a nap,
Stuart got a sexual slap.
Michelle was quite pushy
Stuart must not be fussy!
He's now got a dose of the clap.

On a seat were a house full of mates
They had to choose two to make an escape
This is so hard to do
Said the one who had witnessed the Pooh
Realizing she had made a mistake

They're burger-flipping today
- a job on minimum pay.
Big Brother gives orders
for the fast food they'll slaughter-
Emma will work there one day.

While the Milkman was sat there just layin'
A Pipe of his own down the Dra -in
Emma walked through the door
How he started to roar
Well it really was very dismaying

There once was a girly called 'Ness.
Who found she was put under stress.
And she was incensed
When the food fight commenced
Cos the garden was all of a mess.

Oops, sorry for starting a duplicate post. Maybe they'll be merged. Incase not, Ive copied my posts from the other thread below.


The task is to last just 4 days.
And they must cook what Big Brother says.
But Michelle and Emma
Now face a dilemma,
They may set the kitchen ablaze.


Between Dan and Jason there's flirtin'
But inside I bet Dan is hurtin'.
But he shouldn't be glum,
He has touched Jason's bum.
And there'll be more to come I am certain.


Now, Ahmed's a bit of a bore.
And just seems to sleep more and more.
He seemed to be smitten
With naughty girl Kitten,
Well off you pop Ahm, there's the door.


I wonder if Victor has hair.
On his head there's a hat always there.
One day he may cough,
And his hat may shoot off,
And the housemates will all stop and stare.


It started at one hundred grand.
But evil Big Brother had planned
That on Saturday night
They would have to fight
To keep all the money in hand.


That Marco's a bit of an ass.
The challenge he wanted to pass.
But too much he ate,
And could no longer wait,
So he sicked it all up on the grass.

There was a young moron called Emma,
who faced a moral dilemma,
should she knock on the door,
or be the cause of a civil war,
because to privacy she was an anathema

There once was a student named Stu,
Who seemed like he hadn't a clue,
Then along came Michelle,
Cast him under her spell,
And now he don't know what to do!