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People who suddenly turn against you for no obvious reason


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Old 21-08-2010, 12:16
blueblade
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Have you ever come across this from friends, family or colleagues ? Someone you've formerly been on good terms with, suddenly and inexplicably turns against you and becomes either totally indifferent to you, or worse, an outright enemy ~ and you have absolutely no idea why. You search your mind to think if there's anything you've done or said which might have caused this problem, but you come up with nothing.

It seems next to impossible to actually ascertain a reason from the person themselves.

Alternatively, have you yourself ever turned against anyone for reasons which would have been unclear to the person concerned ? If so, why, and did you give the individual a reason.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:20
mathertron
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Maybe they were muslim and resented being considered a terrorist worshipper
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:21
4444
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There is always a reason.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:23
mathertron
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There is always a reason.
Also it's worth considering not everyone is blessed with the same tranquility of mind as yourself, and they might just be in a massive shitty due to some inner turmoil and be accidently misdirecting said angst onto you. In which case they may well feel a bit shit about it later.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:25
alfiewozere
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I've gone off people suddenly when they've expressed a racist or homophobic view and expected me to agree with them. But I don't tend to socialise with racists and homophobes, and that's only happened a couple of times in an office environment. And yes, I did tell them why I didn't want to be associated with them.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:28
Alt-F4
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This happened to my flatmate after I slept with his ex-wife. He moved out 2 days later, never saw him again.

Might have been the noise, I couldn't keep her mouth shut.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:31
citizen_smith
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this happened to me, I was getting along really well with this girl, she seemed interested in me, she was single, so I thought... why not? and asked her out. now she says she hates me and is always bitching about me to her friends.
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:34
LittleMinx25
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ive got this problem at my place of work ....

my colleague acts like a right bitch to me & is constantly slagging me off!!!

ive made the assumption she doesnt like me because i only started there a little while ago & am already doing some of her jobs because i do them quicker & more efficently than her even though she has been there for years !!!
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Old 21-08-2010, 12:48
blueblade
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There is always a reason.
There is, but it's knowing what it is, and whether it would make any logical sense if spoken or written down.
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:07
Mesostim
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Maybe because of having barbeque on a hot summers day... that pisses folk off legitmately I've heard.
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:19
TheDonk
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There is, but it's knowing what it is, .
Ask them what their problem is, then you'll know.
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:29
spoty
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Manic depressive?
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:31
cosmo
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Resentment and envy are one reason.

Perhaps you are doing too well blueblade.
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:34
winenroses
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I have a neighbout who is always jumping on me when i go in the garden or when I go out or come in from anywhere. I realise it is loneliness and she also collars others, but I am the nearest in line. She watches our and others every move from her porch.

It wouldn't be so bad if it we could have a decent conversation but it is all about her. She doesn't really want to know about anything else unless it's gossip and hearsay.

When you get a great deal of this it is very tiresome even when you don't want to be uncharitable and I recently muttered, hopefully in her hearing, along the lines of "Oh for goodness sake, get a hobby instead of standing around nattering all day."

I doubt she understands though after all this time and that's an example of someone (me) seeming friendly and then not.

PS I've just realised that that is her hobby!
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:35
*weeschmoo*
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Maybe they have turned against you because they are in cahoots with somone you had a disagreement with. One whole side of our family has done that to us for this reason. word spreads.

If it's impossible to ascertain why then there isn't much you can do. It's horrible though isn't it?
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Old 21-08-2010, 13:44
mklass
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ive got this problem at my place of work ....

my colleague acts like a right bitch to me & is constantly slagging me off!!!

ive made the assumption she doesnt like me because i only started there a little while ago & am already doing some of her jobs because i do them quicker & more efficently than her even though she has been there for years !!!
Well its not surprising that she is like that then eh!.... no-one likes a new person coming in and looking like they are 'taking over'..... i would slow down a bit if i were you and then she might be a bit friendlier......
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Old 21-08-2010, 16:51
Snow_Leopard
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There is, but it's knowing what it is, and whether it would make any logical sense if spoken or written down.
In my experience it's happened to me ( I think ) because someone has said something about me which is either untrue or exaggerated. In the other way, I have changed my opinion of someone because of something I've found out about them. Problem is you don't always know who's being honest, but I try and work that out myself.
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Old 21-08-2010, 16:54
LittleMinx25
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Well its not surprising that she is like that then eh!.... no-one likes a new person coming in and looking like they are 'taking over'..... i would slow down a bit if i were you and then she might be a bit friendlier......
maybe she needs to cut down on the bitching & up her game
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Old 21-08-2010, 17:26
blueblade
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Maybe because of having barbeque on a hot summers day... that pisses folk off legitmately I've heard.
What are you on about ? It's not a neighbour, and I haven't had a BBQ this year.

I wish it was a neighbour. You don't have to have anything to do with them.

Ask them what their problem is, then you'll know.
Easier said than done when someone is pretty much blanking you.

In my experience it's happened to me ( I think ) because someone has said something about me which is either untrue or exaggerated. In the other way, I have changed my opinion of someone because of something I've found out about them. Problem is you don't always know who's being honest, but I try and work that out myself.
That might be close to the truth. Someone saying something about you behind your back, which is a lie.
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Old 21-08-2010, 17:29
kendoguk
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Nope everyone likes the Kenmiester

yea of course its happend probably to everyone at some point, if they dont explain why i just dont bother with them unless they want to explain why.
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Old 21-08-2010, 18:15
mathertron
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You say that like it's a good thing
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Old 21-08-2010, 18:16
chriswyatt
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This happened to me at school. Some kid I was friends with before the summer holidays and he was pretty much my best mate turned against me on the first day back to school. He'd made friends with a bunch of ***** (there was enough of them at my school) and he was bullying me to impress them. He came over to me later on on his own to apologise but I didn't accept it and I don't think I really talked to him again after that.
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Old 21-08-2010, 18:25
Stripes
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Yes, this has happened to me. It gets to a point where it seems there really isn't a reasonable explaination, so you just have to decide it's their loss and keep your real friends closer!
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Old 21-08-2010, 18:50
ScottishWoody
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My best friend throughout Primary School. When we got to High School we ended up in different classes, obviously making new friends in the process. He just seemed to not want to be my friend any more, and even started bullying me for a while!

I still have a chat to him when I see him out, and he came to my 21st, but I don't go out with him any more.
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Old 21-08-2010, 19:10
cosmo
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Lots of posts removed.
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