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EXCLUSIVE: The Sun are running with this story tomorrow!! |
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#1 |
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 11,623
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EXCLUSIVE: The Sun are running with this story tomorrow!!
The X Factor juggernaut has hit a major stumbling block today, as the Sun can SENSATIONALLY reveal that seven of the remaining eight acts have quit the show following Aiden Grimshaw’s shock exit last night.
In an X FACTOR FIRST, our backstage sources have informed us that the contestants were spurred on by Simon Cowell’s harsh yet fair decision to keep improbable people’s champion Katie Weasel on for another week. Serial romper Matt Cardle, Aiden’s BFF and previous show front-runner, was the first to display his disgust at the night’s events. In shocking scenes that will no doubt defame his character even further, he was quoted as saying, “You know what, it’s just not worth it anymore. I was mainly doing this to get into Aiden’s pants. I’ve gone through every girl within a ten mile radius, and this has really thrown a spanner in the works. I’m not in this to win. I’m in this to shag.” He was followed by Cowell’s prize boyband and part-time rent boys, Wand Erection. The Sun understands that the one whose name no-one can remember, but who did that ridiculous talking bit in the group rendition of ‘Forget You’, was given a gentle nudge out of the door after registering his disgust at Grimshaw’s exit on Twitter. Says our source: “Nobody thought it would matter that they got rid of sea urchin. But Harry started screaming ‘I hate you, I hate you, stop touching my boyfriend,’ at the bouncers who were trying to eject him from the building, and then he cut off all his hair in a bizarre display of solidarity. The others were bemused and Simon was furious; he’s got it into his head that Harry’s glorious mane of hair is the key to their success. Liam tried to distance himself, but it was eventually decided they were a bit too young and impressionable for such a tough competition.” In another dramatic turn of events, Mary Byrne, Paije Richardson and Rebecca Fergson were seen shrugging, saying it was getting a bit intense, and leaving quietly through the back door. Our on-the-scene spy reveals: “Apparently a cruise ship was waiting at the docks to snap Mary up, and Rebecca realised she would probably get screwed over in the next couple of weeks for someone with minimal talent but more capacity to sell newspaper inches. Paije is going to see if he can make it as an extra in the next big film franchise – apparently they’re recruiting for the Hobbit.” Wagner, the Brazilian sex pest with a heart of gold, was the next one to give up the fight. Wagner has been ROCKED WITH THE RECENT REVELATION that he has fathered a child named Wagbo. Our source continues, “It was only a matter of time. He hated the boos he was getting each week, and Wagbo needed him. He’s been terrorising the country for weeks now, and needs a firm hand to keep him in line. Wagner is the man for the job.” Finally, we can reveal that Cher Lloyd, Cheryl Cole’s previous favourite contestant, turned against the nation's sweetheart in dramatic scenes sure to infuriate Simon Cowell further. "Cher was furious to find out that Katie Weasel was STILL in the running, despite being the most unpopular contestant in the history of any reality TV show, ever," reveals our spy. "She was last seen packing a bag for LA, muttering something about ‘JayZ’, "Cheap shoes," and ‘Swag’." The dramatic events of the night leave just one contestant left in the running: Katie Weasel. We caught up with her this morning, and though she was keen to spill the beans, we cannot reveal the full transcript of her SENSATIONAL interview through fear that it might enrage the average X Factor viewer into a crazed frenzy. Katie was, however, quick to stress, that this was ‘the real her’, and she would ‘continue to fight, even though there’s no one to fight against.’ She thanked ‘Uncle Simon’ and cryptically mentioned a ‘tape that will never, ever get shown. Unless I’m dropped from Syco, of course’. We will continue to bring you dedicated coverage of the situation as and when it happens. |
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#2 |
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Titan Uranus
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Quite a gripping adventure.
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#3 |
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 8,069
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![]() Good!! |
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#4 |
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: DB6 Finalist - 4th Place!
Posts: 12,377
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Brilliant
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#5 |
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Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 5,429
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Ridiculous....The Sun could never run such an excellent article ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
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#6 |
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 7,919
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The thing is though, your story is likely to be more beleivable than the suns headline tommorrow
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#7 |
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Broughty Ferry
Posts: 30,547
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The Sun front page tomorrow has an exclusive about Katies US recording contract I thought that was old news.
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#8 |
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Warwickshire
Posts: 1,578
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Have to admit, I had a good giggle!
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#9 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 11,623
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Quote:
The Sun front page tomorrow has an exclusive about Katies US recording contract I thought that was old news.
We'll wait and see who's right in the morning.
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#10 |
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 5,077
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Have you ever read an article in the Sun, or seen what their typical reader looks like? I think you overestimate them a bit.
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#11 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 11,623
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Quote:
Have you ever read an article in the Sun, or seen what their typical reader looks like? I think you overestimate them a bit.
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#12 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 40,364
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Quote:
The Sun front page tomorrow has an exclusive about Katies US recording contract I thought that was old news.
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#13 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 482
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It's funny because that's how a Sun article would look
all you're missing is a picture of Katie and the caption 'Evil Bitch....Katie Waisel (24)' |
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#14 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,090
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Haha! I so wish that was all true
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#15 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 2,276
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Quote:
The X Factor juggernaut has hit a major stumbling block today, as the Sun can SENSATIONALLY reveal that seven of the remaining eight acts have quit the show following Aiden Grimshaw’s shock exit last night.
In an X FACTOR FIRST, our backstage sources have informed us that the contestants were spurred on by Simon Cowell’s harsh yet fair decision to keep improbable people’s champion Katie Weasel on for another week. Serial romper Matt Cardle, Aiden’s BFF and previous show front-runner, was the first to display his disgust at the night’s events. In shocking scenes that will no doubt defame his character even further, he was quoted as saying, “You know what, it’s just not worth it anymore. I was mainly doing this to get into Aiden’s pants. I’ve gone through every girl within a ten mile radius, and this has really thrown a spanner in the works. I’m not in this to win. I’m in this to shag.” He was followed by Cowell’s prize boyband and part-time rent boys, Wand Erection. The Sun understands that the one whose name no-one can remember, but who did that ridiculous talking bit in the group rendition of ‘Forget You’, was given a gentle nudge out of the door after registering his disgust at Grimshaw’s exit on Twitter. Says our source: “Nobody thought it would matter that they got rid of sea urchin. But Harry started screaming ‘I hate you, I hate you, stop touching my boyfriend,’ at the bouncers who were trying to eject him from the building, and then he cut off all his hair in a bizarre display of solidarity. The others were bemused and Simon was furious; he’s got it into his head that Harry’s glorious mane of hair is the key to their success. Liam tried to distance himself, but it was eventually decided they were a bit too young and impressionable for such a tough competition.” In another dramatic turn of events, Mary Byrne, Paije Richardson and Rebecca Fergson were seen shrugging, saying it was getting a bit intense, and leaving quietly through the back door. Our on-the-scene spy reveals: “Apparently a cruise ship was waiting at the docks to snap Mary up, and Rebecca realised she would probably get screwed over in the next couple of weeks for someone with minimal talent but more capacity to sell newspaper inches. Paije is going to see if he can make it as an extra in the next big film franchise – apparently they’re recruiting for the Hobbit.” Wagner, the Brazilian sex pest with a heart of gold, was the next one to give up the fight. Wagner has been ROCKED WITH THE RECENT REVELATION that he has fathered a child named Wagbo. Our source continues, “It was only a matter of time. He hated the boos he was getting each week, and Wagbo needed him. He’s been terrorising the country for weeks now, and needs a firm hand to keep him in line. Wagner is the man for the job.” Finally, we can reveal that Cher Lloyd, Cheryl Cole’s previous favourite contestant, turned against the nation's sweetheart in dramatic scenes sure to infuriate Simon Cowell further. "Cher was furious to find out that Katie Weasel was STILL in the running, despite being the most unpopular contestant in the history of any reality TV show, ever," reveals our spy. "She was last seen packing a bag for LA, muttering something about ‘JayZ’, "Cheap shoes," and ‘Swag’." The dramatic events of the night leave just one contestant left in the running: Katie Weasel. We caught up with her this morning, and though she was keen to spill the beans, we cannot reveal the full transcript of her SENSATIONAL interview through fear that it might enrage the average X Factor viewer into a crazed frenzy. Katie was, however, quick to stress, that this was ‘the real her’, and she would ‘continue to fight, even though there’s no one to fight against.’ She thanked ‘Uncle Simon’ and cryptically mentioned a ‘tape that will never, ever get shown. Unless I’m dropped from Syco, of course’. We will continue to bring you dedicated coverage of the situation as and when it happens. |
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#16 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: London
Posts: 3,015
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hahaha awesome.
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#17 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 3,192
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urgh...it was like reading a schoolgirl's diary.
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#18 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 17,470
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I thought it was serious until the part about Matt trying to get into Aidens pants.
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#19 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 40,364
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Quote:
I thought it was serious until the part about Matt trying to get into Aidens pants.
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#20 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 6,283
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this would qualify as a novel in the Sun....
reat novel though
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#21 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 13,496
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Quote:
Yes - that recording contract which poor Simon knows nothing about despite the fact that he bought Katie out of it on condition she made the live shows.
![]() ![]() It also said that album was released last Friday with the track she sung tonight included |
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#22 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 11,623
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Quote:
urgh...it was like reading a schoolgirl's diary.
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#23 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Great Yarmouth
Posts: 35
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it would be the best thing to happen on xfactor imho
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#24 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 3,192
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Quote:
I actually don't know what you mean. Have the Sun started employing school girls to write for them?
![]() Pretend story for a pretend mocked up paper can employ any pretend schoolgirl! Playtime is over! |
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#25 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: London
Posts: 2,605
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Haha brill
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