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Is Poetry a Dead Art? (Part 3) |
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#26 |
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Thanks Musty. I agree it's a shame One Sky got left on the end of part 2. Redo From Start is too technical for the first in part 3. Oh well, the DS blade cuts and cannot be undone.
![]() Oh, here we are
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#27 |
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Janet & Prudence
I Janet Stevens seemed The sort of pupil who with concentration Would shine amid the halls of education. Janet shunned the crowd, Though gossip in the girls' school simply bored her, She noticed how the others all ignored her. Lonely on the fringe, A need to join the club and those who ran it, To be a welcome member suited Janet. She learned how to please Her peers, when such a vital need corrupted No teacher interfered or interrupted. Yet there was a test; To prove your worth and truly be successful You had to make a victim's life more stressful. Janet soon would find The perfect target to promote her fully, A new girl she could take apart and bully. Prudence Cousins seemed The sort of pupil who would never fight back, A pale outsider, shy but on the right track. Didn't act the same As others did and while she meekly studied No friendship ever blossomed once or budded. Janet took her chance To rise by making Prudence's road rocky, She sneered at her in netball and in hockey. Whispered hints she was A lesbian or something more horrendous, 'Her red hair and her spectacles offend us.' Term after cruel term Through piling pressure on she would discover The pressure came off when she hurt another. II Three decades went by, That year dispersed and left behind their classes, How rapidly we alter when time passes. Janet Stevens now Was married, middle-aged and very wealthy, She owned a business where returns were healthy. In this happy state When she recalled her youth, like creaking hinges Her acts created subtle guilty twinges. Then one day in town Just after deals to make her profits bigger She bumped into an old familiar figure. Prudence Cousins now Was single, middle-aged and often pensive, Her clothes were shabby, dull and inexpensive. In a plastic bag Were well-thumbed novels of romantic longing, She looked eccentric where the mass was thronging. Still she shunned the crowd, For Janet and her club cohorts had branded A fear of them that left her feeling stranded. Never recognized Her tormentor then scurried down an alley With deep and hidden wounds no school can tally. That night in the bed Next to her husband at regret's first dawning How Janet Stevens cried and ached till morning. © |
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#28 |
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Janet & PrudenceI
© After thinking Prudence would in business, somehow unknowingly destroy Janet's business, I started to think they would meet and Janet would offer Prudence a top job and they would all live happily ever after................then real life intruded. Poor Prudence.
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#29 |
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That was so sad. At first I felt sorry for Janet, and then I felt sorry for Prudence, but then I thought Prudence would come out on top. How wrong I was.
After thinking Prudence would in business, somehow unknowingly destroy Janet's business, I started to think they would meet and Janet would offer Prudence a top job and they would all live happily ever after................then real life intruded. |
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#30 |
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Sorry there was no happy ending Biz. The key line was 'Janet shunned the crowd' near the start - I wanted to show that in fact both girls were similar. But the choice Janet made and Prudence couldn't caused the vast differences in their lives. Maybe it was an extreme example, but it's known now that victims of school bullying can be affected in adult life.
What we don't know is why Prudence was so vulnerable. Oooh! You have opened a can of worms.
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#31 |
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What we don't know is why Prudence was so vulnerable.
Oooh! You have opened a can of worms. ![]() |
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#32 |
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. ... and it's the end of winter
Sunshine! it gently carresses me. we're all more cheerful (and wear less, corrrr!). In the garden, everything starts growing, unceasing damn hard work ........ |
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#33 |
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In the garden, everything starts growing, unceasing damn hard work ........
Hi Spiney
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#34 |
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.............. I'm glad you picked up on Janet's remorse - I felt that was a positive thing, although sad. She'd been in Prudence's shoes herself once.
Get me - I'll be falling into Soaps soon and arguing over the characters. ![]() Quote:
. ... and it's the end of winter
Sunshine! it gently carresses me. ................................... In the garden, everything starts growing, unceasing damn hard work ........ Quote:
I know, I did my first bit of watering today
Hi Spiney ![]()
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#35 |
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Any Never. (inspired by a recent DS GD thread title.)
Any never left UK Any never had nice day Any never lived with mum Any never wore a gun Many never came home. Many never gain to roam. Many never got the plot. Many gave it all they'd got. Reminds me of forgotten wars. Distant. What! What! What fors. Trenches only seen in books. Hell on earth, by the looks. I ran a mile from Her shilling. Sound and strong, but just not willing to be ordered. To abandon sense survival, for some random - battle for a piece of land? Or make some people understand that they shall be put to rights? Men! Get them in your sights. And then. For just a lick of oil we can turn the sand to soil. Build fine buildings, Sell big cars. Like to buy some movie stars? I've seen museums, old and dank. Echoic chambers dimly lit. Heroic fighters grimly sit around an ancient tank. Wounded lies their oldest friend. They pray to god for war's end. And bury in some nameless land the bravest of their little band. Some say you can smell the oil mixed with sweat and deadly toil. See the sorrow in their faces. Luckily the human race is Better since the end of war. Nicer without ancient lore. Lovelier than long ago. Or could be, in the end you know. sins of the father. I created little monkeys and told them how to pray. I told them they're my flunkies and then I hid away. I insisted on thankfulness above all the other. I hate to watch them undress, but when they uncover the fossils I hid long before they twinkled in my eye, I think of what's for them in store. Guess I'm a twisted guy. I told them I made it all in just seven days, but that was way before my fall (too many milky ways). Now I couldn't make a shake without them all complaining. They blame me for the earthquake. They blame me when it's raining. Can't stop them fighting, I'm the worthiest of cause. Enough of this writing. I must sharpen my claws. |
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#36 |
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Any Never. (inspired by a recent DS GD thread title.)
sins of the father. The first one's a perceptive look at the history of combat. I like the way you tied in Afghanistan to previous wars. The ryhme of 'faces' and 'human race is' is excellent - wish I'd thought of that ![]() Sins of the father is fascinating - almost making God this conjurer who casts spells that everyone falls for. The thread's got off to a strong start
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#37 |
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Thanks Musty. I may have used the 'faces' - 'race is' rhyme before. I often find I re-use endings.
![]() Probably the last for me for a bit (stop cheering at the back!). Got a huge list of things to sort out around the house and garden, while it's not too hot... |
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#38 |
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Philosophical treatise on the existence of:
I contemplated upon the existence of this very third thread
I am given to such thoughts … pensively in the pose of Rodin's "Le Penseur") … thinks, as I am. The first Fred I postulate (ooh Mrs!) is deep thinker Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche known for saying a lot: his bigee “God is dead.” Memory endures of a second archived "fred" – as never to be forgotten as the DS enshrinement (of this ilk) and a sample of a man and superman (all man) more a man of ale than cake - one Frederick Seward Trueman known as Fred [professional Yorkshireman & cricketer] whose major philosophy was to knock Lancashire batters' blocks off. Before many more worry frowns curse my poor forehead I will not forge ahead right now or speculate about a fourth "thread" though “Skuttle” surfaces toot sweet. |
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#39 |
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LOL
Nice one Frank - only poetry could allow Freds Trueman, Scuttle and Nietzsche to congregate
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#40 |
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Probably the last for me for a bit (stop cheering at the back!). Got a huge list of things to sort out around the house and garden, while it's not too hot...
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#41 |
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Any Never. (inspired by a recent DS GD thread title.)
sins of the father.
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#42 |
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Philosophical treatise on the existence of:
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#43 |
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Hi, Musty. I'm hoping Prudence's life has by now taken a turn for the better.
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#44 |
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[b]Janet & Prudence
© Great write. ![]() In fact I think you should expand into doing some short stories.
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#45 |
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Thanks Musty/Biz for the feedback.
I liked the idea of a poem Archiver personalising a god even though an atheist, It worked nicely for me, the power (not conceded by some) of poetry. Do return won't you when less busy. |
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#46 |
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Hi, Musty. I'm hoping Prudence's life has by now taken a turn for the better.
![]() ![]() Quote:
A fascinating character study Musty, read it a few times as it's very story like.
In fact I think you should expand into doing some short stories. Someone suggested that to me before, but I haven't written any stories since school It's something I've had in mind for a long time and may attempt if the right idea comes along
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#47 |
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LOL
Nice one Frank - only poetry could allow Freds Trueman, Scuttle and Nietzsche to congregate ![]() ![]() Quote:
Be honest Biz, you're just a sucker for happy endings
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#48 |
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Tribute to Rain
Nineteen sixty-six, Beatles got their kicks Playing magic tricks Came the April day When they blew away Tin Pan Alley's way On their Paperback Writer throbbed a black Vinyl B-side track When Rain was released Old conventions ceased And the light increased Drums and bass unlocked Psychedelics stocked, Metal axe that rocked Don't hide when it pours Or when sunshine soars, Open mental doors As the fade-out cleared Backward tapes appeared, NiaR was tersely sneered Pop and rock combined, Perfectly designed Acid for the mind Yet I can't explain How John wrote the plain Genius of Rain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3t52Ielj48 |
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#49 |
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I've got to admit that I've never heard or heard of that one before, Musty, but then I wasn't buying records at the time, and only know the ones played on the radio, or in films.
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#50 |
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I've got to admit that I've never heard or heard of that one before, Musty, but then I wasn't buying records at the time, and only know the ones played on the radio, or in films.
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