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The Grumpy Old Women Thread... (Part 17)
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KJ44
10-04-2012
Originally Posted by batgirl:
“Actually it's not all of it that's crappy, just the stuff to do with my mum. She's getting more and more vile - and physically aggressive - while I'm getting more and more knackered from dealing with everything for her. It's not a good mix, and I'm not sure how much longer I can keep it up.”

Remember some time ago we were thinking of ways to get your mum to see the doctor?

Maybe you should go and see your GP and that might trigger 'the system' to get both of you some help. You sound very stressed indeed.
snowy ghost
10-04-2012
poor Bats see inbox
batgirl
10-04-2012
Thanks snOwy.
batgirl
10-04-2012
Originally Posted by KJ44:
“Remember some time ago we were thinking of ways to get your mum to see the doctor?

Maybe you should go and see your GP and that might trigger 'the system' to get both of you some help. You sound very stressed indeed.”

I managed to get her as far as the psychiatrist so there's a diagnosis and she's in the system, it's just amazing what the system expects relatives to cope with. Even with the GP, a specialist consultant, a social worker and a psychiatric nurse in tow, preserving independence seems to be the key phrase.

It's all smoke and mirrors up to a point and if I walked away she'd be sectioned. I'm not sure I can live with that. Well, I am today truth be told, but I don't want to react... but yes, I am very stressed.
Biz
10-04-2012
It's an tragic and impossible situation to be in batgirl. Life can be so cruel. You can only do your best. Thinking of you.
Sadperson
10-04-2012
Originally Posted by batgirl:
“I managed to get her as far as the psychiatrist so there's a diagnosis and she's in the system, it's just amazing what the system expects relatives to cope with. Even with the GP, a specialist consultant, a social worker and a psychiatric nurse in tow, preserving independence seems to be the key phrase.

It's all smoke and mirrors up to a point and if I walked away she'd be sectioned. I'm not sure I can live with that. Well, I am today truth be told, but I don't want to react... but yes, I am very stressed.”

I think it's time to give the system an ultimatum. Preserving whose independence? Can it possibly be described as such when it reaches this point? What about yours? Am sending all the love and vibes in the world, I hate seeing you like this. If there's anything I can do... well, you know the rest xxxx
KJ44
10-04-2012
Gently echoing what Sad said; BG, look after yourself.

Talking with a doctor about how you feel might seem pointless but you never know.
batgirl
11-04-2012
Originally Posted by KJ44:
“Gently echoing what Sad said; BG, look after yourself.

Talking with a doctor about how you feel might seem pointless but you never know.”

Yes, I need to go back and ask for some counselling to cope with stress better. We had that conversation last year and she let me try some tranquilizers first, not as a long term thing just more as a case of emergency rations. Funny thing is, I've waited this long to try them... and they don't work on me.

Anyway, don't worry about me cyber chums. I feel much brighter today and don't intend to have any contact for a couple of days. That feels really good.
KJ44
11-04-2012
Originally Posted by batgirl:
“... they don't work on me ... I feel much brighter today”


I won't tell her if you don't ...
snowy ghost
11-04-2012
greetings all am cream crackered from trip to Eire
batgirl
11-04-2012
Originally Posted by KJ44:
“I won't tell her if you don't ... ”

Hahaha Nah, I took one weeks ago. Nothing. I doubled the dose. Nothing. I'm not going to bother with doing x 3.

We went to see Battleship this afternoon and it was good fun. Complete nonsense of course but perfect for a cold and rainy day.
handymelon
11-04-2012
Hello, all - sorry for the radio silence; it's been a busy old holiday weekend!

((((((((((((((batty))))))))))))))) - for God's sake, don't hold out too long.
It's not doing her anuy good, or you, is it?
Ask yourself, seriously - where would she be better off?
And we *DO* worry about you, so there!

As tot he rest of it - M got so many Easter eggs we had to turn some of them into choccy krispie buns... Yums!
batgirl
12-04-2012
I was thinking about where you'd got to handy.

I'm fine, really. Much better for having a couple of days *off* from dealing with ma, and as I've had no phone calls from anyone I'm assuming there's been no crisis. Famous last words probably...

Home day for me. Time to catch up with some work and maybe even do a spot of domestic goddessing. I'm planning to make fresh pasta. Eek.
snowy ghost
12-04-2012
hmnnn fresh pasta...
KJ44
12-04-2012
I've been "Home Alone" since Good Friday, but now the ladies KJ have returned. Those of you who run nuclear power stations or gas pipelines may have noticed the surge in demand. Shares in woolly jumpers sank at the news.
handymelon
12-04-2012
I've been watching my weight since I got back to work cos I put a stone on while I was convalescing and I can't get any of my bloody jeans on.

Today, however, I had pizza for dinner (out with my Dad and Melony) and Mr M has just informed me that we're having apple pie and custard to follow our cut-price Morrison's Lancashire Hot-Pot later. So I've just stopped counting the clas tonight and bugger it!

*blows a kiss to bats*
Making fresh pasta... that's domestic godessery, that is!
Sadperson
13-04-2012
I have spent all day cleaning my house *is proud* (only because we have guests this evening mind )
Exceedingly grumpy about inconsiderate people in our street (recent move-ins with younger children) who think it's perfectly acceptable for their offspring (aged from about 6 to about 11) to kick footballs around in the middle of the road every day, trample on our gardens to retrieve same, and when we object, get their parents to hurl abuse at us...
Every house in this road has a decent sized garden and there's a huge playing field just up the road but the lazy parents can't be bothered to take the kids up there and watch them, oh no. They'd much rather they played in the road - when a car or delivery van could shoot round the corner any minute (even at 30mph they'd do some damage) - I just don't get some people.

And breathe......
KJ44
13-04-2012
Sad, that's a nightmare.

Why not ask on DS advice?

You'll get people who will say you're being nasty, that they're only kids ... but although this is DS and people will seize any chance to have a pop, you're made of stern stuff ...

.. and maybe someone will have a solution that works.
snowy ghost
13-04-2012
Originally Posted by KJ44:
“Sad, that's a nightmare.

Why not ask on DS advice?

You'll get people who will say you're being nasty, that they're only kids ... but although this is DS and people will seize any chance to have a pop, you're made of stern stuff ...

.. and maybe someone will have a solution that works. ”

I have been grumping in advice to day
Sadperson
13-04-2012
It's a plan at that... I'll work up to it but maybe tomorrow when I've calmed down from the latest exchange. At the moment it seems to have sunk to 'my gang's bigger than your gang' -
handymelon
13-04-2012
Just what you need! Poor Sad! ((((((((((((huggle)))))))))))))

We've been to two parties in one day (tot social life, not our, of course!) and I have to go out to the shops in a minute cos we hadn't time to stop on the way home! *iz ded*
batgirl
13-04-2012
Originally Posted by snowy ghost:
“I have been grumping in advice to day”

*waves at all the grupsters and goes off to have a look^
Amica
13-04-2012
Evening. I have been to the theatre to see avery silly play called Swallows and Amazons which I enjoyed muchly,

Park your car where they normally play is my advice<Sad. Get others on your street to do similar. A few of my neighbours got together to do this a few years ago and moved some kids on.
Sadperson
14-04-2012
Originally Posted by Amica:
“Evening. I have been to the theatre to see avery silly play called Swallows and Amazons which I enjoyed muchly,

Park your car where they normally play is my advice<Sad. Get others on your street to do similar. A few of my neighbours got together to do this a few years ago and moved some kids on.”

We started out doing that. One of their mothers came and called Mr Sad a miserable old b*stard for doing it. We ignored that... then the next door neighbours (pensioners) got similar abuse from another mother after they did the same.

At that point, we quietly contacted the local PCSO and asked if a word could be had. A letter went out to all households in the road from the local police gently suggesting the playing field was a more suitable environment for ball games. Two days later a counter letter has been sentby the families of the children involved, claiming (among other things) that those of us who object are in the minority. Which isn't actually true, but some people prefer to avoid conflict - as do we. We've lived here 14 years and there have never been any fall outs with neighbours anywhere in the road, so it's all really horrible.

We've tried the subtle approach, we've tried the asking nicely approach, we've met with abuse and then this defensive behaviour... we've opted for a dignified silence in response now.

It's a bit worrying as we know from past experience that the kids who tend to end up being troublemakers in a small place like this are invariably the ones whose families are so quick to jump up and down in their defence..'they're bored/you're picking on them/etc' - *sigh* - it's incredibly frustrating.

Anyway, in the great scheme of things it's not that important. I just needed a grump. As much fun as posting in Advice is... I don't think it will help on this occasion.

And I'm bracing myself for being back at work on Monday.
Amica
14-04-2012
Originally Posted by Sadperson:
“


And I'm bracing myself for being back at work on Monday. ”

Be gentle with yourself.
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