We recently lost our 11 year-old cat to kidney failure and we are all devastated by it, including her 12 year-old sister.

The big issue is that our remaining cat has got very vocal and howls at me when I am trying to work, chatting to my OH, in the bath, anywhere really. I know she wants attention and do my best to give her lots of extra attention and cuddles. But I am worried that she is becoming too clingy. If we go out, for example, she is so desperate to see us when we get back.

Deep down I suspect she wants another cat as she has never been on her own but I just can't do this right now for lots of reasons.

Has anyone else experienced this howling behaviour and how have they handled it?

I think the only way to handle it is to continue what you're doing - giving your cat lots of extra attention and cuddles. It can take months for a cat to get used to not having its companion around and many cats do grieve very intensely. Poor little thing

I'm sorry for your loss.

Sorry for your loss, I feel for you.

When my cat's brother died last year he became very vocal. As you say it's howling more than miaowing. My sister and parent's cats also did the same when they lost their companion. I think it may be one of the ways that they grieve. My parent and sister's cats got over their loss in time and grew to enjoy being the only cat and the centre of attention. I hope it is the same for your cat.

My boy didn't get over the loss of his brother, and eventually I got 2 more cats. The howling stopped, but he has never been the same since his brother died.

I think just give your cat lots of love and reassurance and hopefully in time she will adapt.

Thank you so much for your replies and for your kind words. It is good to know this is normal and that I am handling it the right way. We miss our little furry baby so much its unbearable at times. I keep expecting to see her...

Awww

My oldest cat (nearly 20) used to yowl on the doorstep every time he came back from the cattery, the noise was horrendous. He's now almost completely deaf, so he's stopped doing it, presumably because he can't hear himself!

It is very loud and very distressing and I was quite unprepared for it. To make things worse, family are pressuring us to go and visit for a few days and simply refuse to understand that we can't just leave her. People who don't have animals just don't understand. I think what she needs right now is a regular schedule with us around.

You're so right, people who dodn't have animals or aren't sympathetic towards them don't understand. Honestly, I'd stay at home with her, she'll learn to cope with her grief quicker if you're around.

Please bear in mind that she is missing her sibling, who she has grown-up with and has always been there.

Just AN-Other cat may not neccesarily fill the void and could even antogonise her.

All she knows is that her sister isn't around anymore and will be struggling to understand why.

You're right about that. Friends think I'm mad when I say I can't just go away for a couple of nights and leave the cats alone because I have to be around to give them their medication. They're as much of a responsibility as children (and sometimes a lot less trouble!).

I get that from friends too. They sort of say "oh..." (tinged with confusion) "... of course...." when I explain I can't just up sticks and go away for the weekend and leave my cat to fend for himself.

I know most of them they think I'm OTT with regard to my cat. After all, everyone knows cats can just look after themselves while you are away.....

I feel for you *stargazer*, and your cat. I hope things settle down in your household.

Thanks everyone for your kindness and advice. It is much appreciated. I knew the DS pet community were the right people to ask.