I’d forgotten about that particular shed-load of tripe. It was all nonsense: a tapestry of dross, knitting full of dropped stitches, woeful darning in the wrong colours. By all means, do a fairy tale (grim to the factor of what?) but don't invent things that include wives/babies.

And nothing has changed, except the fictitious object of La Jones’ affections swoops hither and thither, and is now an imaginary RS.

The MM was a windfall in the orchard of LJ’s fruitful imagination.

(Someone I call The Roving Eye of Exmoor told me that he knows nothing of a crazed creature at Brushford in search of commitment and fodder for demented outpourings in a national paper: REofE’s radar covers most of the world…told him he’s missed zilch)

Oh, if anyone is interested I thought I’d go to the Open Day at Upcott as I’m nearly on the doorstep that weekend. I shall dress appropriately - blue blazer with gold buttons, the pre-owned VB dress (won't be able to breathe as size sub zero, but hey, ho) and I thought wellies and gardening gloves would set off the look quite well. As the “estate” is taking so long to sell, I thought maybe it will be offered as 2nd prize in a raffle (1st prize: £26,000 holiday with LJ), and if I got the 2nd prize I could ask DS Crazed Harpies to come and stay: good plan?
Last edited by newbaby : 09-09-2011 at 18:52

Fantastic idea!

You know, you might suggest to the estate agent that they think to raffle it. I"m sure that would make the Dreary one week.

Oooh, perfect! If enough harpies attend we could overflow into the B & B next door!

I can't imagine how she resisted paralleling her marriage to that of Liz and Dick. I mean, she's Liz, and he pretty much qualifies for the "d" word . . .

Haha!, can't wait to hear all about it if you do manage to go.
I'm sure that LJ will make herself scarce and has delegated the task of controlling the riff-raff to the long suffering Nic.

However, imagining you did get to meet LJ, it would be fun to see her face (surgery permitting) after you tell her that VB is a friend who always gives you front row seats at her fashion shows, and that the dress was a gift.
Good luck

[quote=newbaby;52656659Oh, if anyone is interested I thought I’d go to the Open Day at Upcott as I’m nearly on the doorstep that weekend. I shall dress appropriately - blue blazer with gold buttons, the pre-owned VB dress (won't be able to breathe as size sub zero, but hey, ho) and I thought wellies and gardening gloves would set off the look quite well. As the “estate” is taking so long to sell, I thought maybe it will be offered as 2nd prize in a raffle (1st prize: £26,000 holiday with LJ), and if I got the 2nd prize I could ask DS Crazed Harpies to come and stay: good plan?[/QUOTE]

Excellent idea. But don't forgat to take a clothes peg for the nose, or perhaps a mask of some kind, to filter out the smell of the incontinent dogs and cats.

And of course, having (allegedly) asked her to stop writing about him, what does she do ?

Subzero is great! Liz talks about the horrors of anorexia, but frankly I don't think she looks anywhere near anorexia lately. . . and I suspect that simply seeing a woman in a sub zero dress will cause her to have jealous fits, since she is characteristically two-faced about the issue. She thinks she's grand because she wanted larger models (and talks as though that was the only problem at "Marie Claire" that led to dismissal). On the other hand, she also harps on the joys of being anorexic and feeling superior to people who, well, eat. I think she's dropped "I love being an anorexic" because someone pointed out "You don't have the thighs, dear."

Mind you you'll be in one of her future Dreary entries as "I hate women who wear VB and don't bow and scrape to me. They must die." As far as I can tell, "they must die" is the only real remedy for a world in which such unacceptable people as men, women, and children are alive.

Exactly - from my (male) viewpoint, she's got chunky thighs - not even close to being anorexic now, if indeed she ever was.

Random LJ quotes:

'I have been hacking into his (Nirpal's) emails (quite easy, actually, even when he set up a secret account), listening to his voice mails and reading his text messages'

Yet she never even bothered to google the RS?

'I made him spell out her name. I won't print it in full because she has a boyfriend. I am not in the business of ruining lives, even though she had no compunction about ruining mine'

What about ruining the RS's girlfriend's life?

'He told me he didn't want children (what he should have added was (for at least ten years). I hid the fact that I did.'

'he (Nirpal) wrote in another paper that he was, for the first time, thinking about becoming a dad.
Writing that, when you have just left your wife and have stolen her last childbearing years from her, is hitting pretty far below the belt'

'And although I know that having children can make a divorce a million times worse, if I had been able to have a baby, or adopted as we had planned, then at least I would have been left with something'

Hmmmm.....

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...g-husband.html










.

When is it - did I see October 1st mentioned somewhere?

I may well join you.
I shall be appropriately dressed in Primark's finest, with my massive norks well hoiked up

Expect a vicious piece any day now from (opportunistic money,money, money at any cost, attention seeking) LJ, lambasting Lily Allen for having the audacity to be happy in being a wife, expectant mother, and contented home-maker ...cooking meals and baking cakes for her new husband (in response to DM on-line article today about Lily). Probably on the lines of letting down all of women (one's like LJ of course) and feminist movements.... blah.....blah....blah... only having appalling child to keep husband.....drone....drone...drone quick ........ copy/paste/copy/paste/copy/paste ...laughing all the way to the bank Liz easy peasy.....oh the joys of working for a newspaper with so little editorial control rolleyes:

Liz is a crackpot for sure, but suing the paper because they said you told fibs about going to keep fit is a bit pathetic Kate!

(oh silly me, of course, it's lucrative!)

I wonder why Fashion Guru Liz Jones isn't reporting the NY Fasion week for the DM? Is she too busy having a mini-break with the RS? Or is she banned from that too?

It does seem a little petty to sue Liz over lies she tells about an actress's exercise routine, but then on the other hand anything that costs the Mail money because Liz has opened her big yap and lied is good in that it has got to leave the Mail a tiny bit irked at her. I'm all for that.

What exactly did she do to get banned from all of these fashion shows?? What on EARTH would a journalist have to do to get barred from even a seat way, way at the back? Is the Mail too downmarket and thus not a paper they want to cover their work? Or did Liz do something particularly horrific? Simply writing about wanting larger size models--was that her crime? If so, why would the Mail hire her as their "fashion guru" (guru--there's a word that was hip and happenin' oh, 40 years ago). And what's the point of having a fashion guru if she can't get to the shows?

I believe she joined some sort of govt. 'think tank' about anorexia and size zero models. I forget the details - maybe she was a govt. 'Size Tsar'!

I assumed that's why she's banned from lots of fashion shows & stuff.
Maybe they just don't like her

Why has LJ been banned from numerous fashion shows?

>On learning that designer Luella Bartley had gone out of business:

LIZ JONES: No wonder Luella went bust. British fashion is too snobby by half!

Posted by Liz Jones on Monday, November 16th, 2009 at 3:24 pm.


(Btw, I'm sure that many of LJ's earlier criticisms were valid - years ago she did express herself in more reasoned way)

From today's Dreary:

"I’ve taken my house off the market."

Maybe you should tell the estate agents, then ? Still on their site for £1.695 million as of three minutes ago.

I liked today's diary- not only has she taken the house off the market, but she's "stopped trying, opening fetes and dog shows and the like."

When did she ever do those things? Or is it just something we've missed? Is it?

Eagerly awaiting the "and so, dear Reader (yes even those Primark-wearing dear Readers with giant feral children) I married him.

But I won't hold my breath

Hahaha! I just checked Strutt & Parker too. I've left a comment, let's see if they publish it.

Mine's up.

Mine too! Almost identical!

I don't understand why, but I keep getting last weeks Dreary.

Tip of the day for LJ if you wanna be liked then don't spend every waking hour getting people's backs up with a tongue that could easily be used to fit an Aximinster and Wilton carpet . If in some parallel universe the RS does turn out to be real...then must be one who's brain's addled from all the rock n roll ....drink n and drugs excesses....no man in his right mind would want to be in the same room let alone propose to harpy the horrible .....ugly on the outside and even uglier on the inside Hilarious how last week she was pretending what a fabulous time she was having.....until the comments reminded her what she'd already written. Takes 3 separate articles to cover a 4 day break in which nothing was said Not posting comment think she likes the attention ..gives DM editor impression she's popular...60 last week

You have to search for her and order it most recent first. They always take ages sorting the links out for the You mag.

LJ has enough gall to go through with pretending to have a live-in relationship with FRS.

(And yes, unfiltered access again! The DM site editor/moderator is definitely up to something..)