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Song writing |
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#1 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Song writing
Hey all
anyone here into song writing ? check out my song/lyrics and see what you think Title - I will be with you Saw your eyes in the bright lights all the tears tumbling down how could you be so alone stranger you were once to me you told me that your life was a tragedy it broke my heart tore me apart from the first breath I knew you didn't see how special you were ------- Verse 2 when you reached out we were meant to be in your eyes I saw the big time love for a lifetime Now I know your name ------- Chorus The bright lights of the street lights can never fade you out you're a star beautiful I don't have to wish and wonder what you are because you were the love of a lifetime that was taken before her/his time And my heart beats in your name As long I dream You live on One day I will be with you I will be with you Verse 3 ------- I write your name everywhere I go for the whole world to know because you made me strong again that's you're deserved fame we can be together I know that's true They won't ever know you , Like I do Im here Standing out in the moonlight: tonight in your spotlight I know you're there Im calling out to you ( Repeat chorus x1 ) ------ Verse 4 My heart won't give up I will never let you fade because all my life I will say your name You will always be my star im calling out to you Instrumental...Interlude... Breakdown (guitar, piano builds up in pace) Crecendo ahahahahahahaaa (repeat x1 chorus) Ending – guitar slows down I know I will be with you Outro/endtro ----- |
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#2 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,078
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Thats actually really good!!!!
What kind of genre and instrumental would you do??? And who would sing it?? Because I'm finding it hard to imagine it but you got talent. |
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#3 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 724
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That's rather lovely. Have you got a tune as well?
If you can do a few more of that quality you should consider getting someone to demo them, and then you never know, you might make a few bob! Oh! Make sure you do all the legal stuff like establishing copywrite and so on. |
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#4 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Thank you for your great and honest feedback very much appreciative
![]() I have a few more I've written will post them on here, Wanted to see what the good and honest digi spy forum members thought just been writing for a while and want to be successful at song writing professionally. Im not a pro yet by any means. Im mainly have come to write ballads and write as much as I can. havent got a tune to it yet. but have written a few chords for an intro.So who would you imagine singing this song? |
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#5 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,078
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For a male I could see Bruno Mars maybe?
For a female I could see Xtina or Alicia Keys Sorry if you disagree |
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#6 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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I totally agree with you without doubt
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#7 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,078
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Quote:
I totally agree with you without doubt
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#8 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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with the choice of Bruno Mars. His rich emotive vocals would really move this song along
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#9 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Heres another song im working on - see what you think
BROKEN Verse 1 -------------- Can you hear me? Reach out if you can, Wake up look around and don’t let go, There’s a soul that’s lost here without you. Verse 2 -------------- It’s simple Clear as all you see As you walk away Think about All I gave to you Do you really want it left untold Chorus I’m lost in my mind Have no control Loosing my life Just come back Save me now That’s my cry to you Can’t you see I am breaking? Do you hear my heart calling? So impaled so in love and I’m broken Verse 3 ----------------- Through the darkness Theres a true light that shines through An endless life time with you. But Now I'm lost in the rain, left to be denied in heart breaking pain, I still hear all the things you say, Nothing to fear How could you walk away? Leave me, in this cruel fate. I feel condemned so faded. For loving you but loving you Is all I can do. Oh loving you is all I can do Repeat chorus x1 Verse 4 ---------- What’s left to say If it’s all gone When you want to End as good bye I still feel the same I’m holding on Still feeling the pain Memories don’t fade Because you’ve gone away I won’t take the blame For loving you but loving you Is all I can do oh loving you is all I can do. Chorus x1 to bridge Piano - guitar slow paced - breakdown Outro ---- And when you look back On this day When you hear whispers of my name Maybe then you might feel the same |
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#10 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,288
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I like it, it's pretty good and you've chosen some pretty interesting lyrics.
I see Bruno Mars for a male too. Possibly Leona Lewis for a female! |
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#11 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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hey Carly thanks for the feedback
![]() I appreciate you can really feel the story of the song ![]() And great choices |
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#12 |
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Inactive Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,775
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Just a little issue OP.
Its spelt Crescendo. ![]() But nice work. I always like people who go into song writing. Shows a different intelligence than just writing pop bubblegum stuff, |
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#13 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Thanks belfastkid
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#14 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,282
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Put most of your effort into the music as that's far more important than the lyrics, especially when it comes to pop songs. No-one's going to care about the lyrics if the song is rubbish.
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#15 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Will do
but appreciate all your feedback
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#16 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,275
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Love how personal your songs are letitshine, am a bit of a keen songwriter myself and would love to make this a sticky thread and see what everyone else can come up with - this is one of my efforts, would love any feedback!
Don’t Tell Me It breaks my heart something chronic Not everything can be historic Something’s simply have to fade away Everybody says I got to believe But sometimes I forget I need to breathe And I don’t think I can face the world today Oh, we used to drown together But now we’re sinking in the shallow end Don’t tell me it’s over Don’t tell me we’ve come to the end of the road I still see the light at the end of the tunnel I know that we’ve got a long way to go Don’t raise that white flag baby Don’t tell me I’ll be okay maybe Don’t tell me I thought that I was strong and stable But suddenly you turned the tables You left me feeling two foot tall Been holding back the rage inside me Don’t want to feel hurt and angry I need to put my pride before this fall Oh, you used to make me a better person Now I can’t look at my own reflection Don’t tell me it’s over Don’t tell me we’ve come to the end of the road I still see the light at the end of the tunnel I know that we’ve got a long way to go Don’t raise that white flag baby Don’t tell me I’ll be okay maybe Don’t tell me I realise my tears were all because of you And now I’m drowning when I should be in love with someone new I can’t believe it took so long for me to break free Without you, I can be who I want to be So you can tell baby that you think it’s over And you can tell me that we’ve come to the end of the road I’ll just keep running for the light at the end of the tunnel And you know that you’ve got a long way to go alone I’m telling you that it’s over |
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#17 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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Hey sorry about late reply... this is awesome ! I really like your style. Thanks for the compliments for my songs too
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#18 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 22
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heres another one im working on
chorus lost my breath in a place that takes my chances, and here it goes my heart beating don't you hear the sound of being alive, oh o the skies are opening there goes fear, all the stars shining my life's just gone supernova. Lost my breath in a place that takes my chances, all the universe colliding here we are into each other, here it goes my heart beating oh o dont you hear the sound of being alive, made for each other so much we live to find real love real life for each other |
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anyone here into song writing ? 
