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Our Own Soap Opera that Goes On Forever...


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Old 06-10-2004, 18:41
LoveUSsoaps
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right, I'll start right lines, each poster picks up the story from where the last one left off...


It was a beautiful sunny day in Albert Square and Pat Butcher was trying her sexy fluffy nightdress out in the mirror for her romantic getaway trip with her secret lover.
She flashed back to a coversation she had once had with Peggy, who called her 'mutton dressed of lamb'.
"Flamin bitch" Pat muttered under her breath "Ah well, she's long gone now, never 'av to see her again."
Suddenly, the doorbell rang.
Pat, euphoric with expectation for Frank's arrival opened the door...
It was..
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Old 06-10-2004, 18:43
Jay-H
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Demi Miller.

'OH MAH GAWD!' she screamed when she saw Demi ready to give birth

'Help me dammit!' yelled Demi.

'OH MAH GAWD!' screamed Pat again.

'I'm havin' muh babay!'

'OH MAH GAWD' Pat repeated.

'Argggghhhhhhhh!' screamed Demi.

Suddenly Pat sprung into action and rang the ambulance.

'Ambulance! Baby. 13. Help.'

She then proceeded to put the phone down and faint.

'HELP!' shrieked Demi, her opening expanding.
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Old 06-10-2004, 18:51
Benc533
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her opening expanding.

Oh dear lord!
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Old 06-10-2004, 18:54
Jay-H
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You're supposed to continue, go on Ben It would be interesting to see what you put
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Old 06-10-2004, 19:00
alan45
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She immediately rang Super Sonia the squares rather nice but dim nurse. Sonia came rushing accross the square but was knocked down by a drunken Ronny Borreria in a clapped out Tocan cab
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Old 06-10-2004, 19:02
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Sarah runs to Sonia and gave her a kick for good measure.

Martin attacked Sarah and an ambulance was called for Sonia.

'OH MY GOD IT's A HEAD!' screamed Demi. 'MY THINGY WON'T STRETCH HELP!'

She then collapsed.
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Old 06-10-2004, 19:05
LoveUSsoaps
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Sarah jumped in and delivered the baby.

"What is it? WHAT IS IT?" screamed Demi.
"Its a girl... I'm afraid she didn't make it." Sarah said coyly.

Demi passed out, and was bleeding to death.

Rather than help her, Sarah wrapped the very much alive baby up and made off with her...

"Martin... I now have your daughter" she laughed to herself.

Then..
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Old 06-10-2004, 21:20
Jay-H
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LOL hehe

I'll continue
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Old 06-10-2004, 21:23
Jay-H
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She ran to Martin, with the baby up her skirt. She promptly 'collapsed'

'OH GOOD GOD MARTIN ITS OUR BABY!' wailed Sarah
'Shurrup, you're not due for months!' said Martin.
'You mean you knew?
'Err...' he stumbled 'Sonia, Sarah? Oh my vision.'
He stumbled backwards.
'OMG! It's coming!' Sarah bellowed, setting car alarms off.

Sarah lifted the baby out and began cuddling it.

'My girl! my beautiful baby girl! I'll call it Sonia!' she cried.

Martin made a face which suggested he had murder in mind, whilst Demi and Sonia blead.
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Old 06-10-2004, 21:25
chocopop
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Martin: "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T HAVE A BABEH WITH YOUUUU!!!"

He smashed up the table / anything he could find.

Sarah giggled maliciously. "Well your going to have to, Martin, darling!"

"Wat-e-va!" Screamed Martin. He promptly shot Sarah with his phone.
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Old 06-10-2004, 21:47
alan45
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Originally Posted by chocopop
Martin: "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T HAVE A BABEH WITH YOUUUU!!!"

He smashed up the table / anything he could find.

Sarah giggled maliciously. "Well your going to have to, Martin, darling!"

"Wat-e-va!" Screamed Martin. He promptly shot Sarah with his phone.
and hopped on the train to weatherfield
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Old 06-10-2004, 22:01
Bootlaces
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Originally Posted by alan45
and hopped on the train to weatherfield
Upon arriving in Weatherfield, Martin stopped to ask directions to the nearest 'caff'. Unfortunately for Martin, the first person he chanced upon was Sean Tully.

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Old 06-10-2004, 22:03
lather
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After shooting Sarah with his phone, Martin was not pleased with the picture and went off to Weatherfield to escape the madhouse that was Albert Square.

Sarah, meanwhile, continued her plan and went looking for Sonia to show her the phone that Martin had dropped.

"He loves meeee" grinned Sarah gleefully. "He took my picture not yours"

Sonia's face dropped on realisation that desperation of spending the life savings on her boob job to make Martin love her was in vain.

The fattest ugliest girl on the square had lost out to the chipmunk. But Sonia had an idea how to deal with her rival.....

Last edited by lather : 06-10-2004 at 22:05. Reason: pp
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Old 06-10-2004, 22:19
LoveUSsoaps
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Originally Posted by lather
After shooting Sarah with his phone, Martin was not pleased with the picture and went off to Weatherfield to escape the madhouse that was Albert Square.

Sarah, meanwhile, continued her plan and went looking for Sonia to show her the phone that Martin had dropped.

"He loves meeee" grinned Sarah gleefully. "He took my picture not yours"

Sonia's face dropped on realisation that desperation of spending the life savings on her boob job to make Martin love her was in vain.

The fattest ugliest girl on the square had lost out to the chipmunk. But Sonia had an idea how to deal with her rival.....
Sonia decided to track down Sarah's mum, to see if she could get any info about her past to use for blackmail so Sarah would back off.
Sonia found Sarah's next door neighbour.
"What's Sarah's mum called?"
"Steph Stokes. Moved up the Yorkshire bout a year back, love. Want the address?"
"Ta..."
Sonia hoped on a train for Yorkshire... she'd pay the bitch back good and proper!!!

Arriving in Emmerdale, Sonia sauntered into the Woolpack.
"Scuse me, my name's Sonia Fowler. I was wonderin if you know a lady by the name of Steph Stokes?"
"Oh I do Sonia" said Louise "She lives in the B&B with her father, here's the address."
"Ta."
Sonia supped a pint and went across to the B&B>


Inside...

"SWALLOW IT, OLD MAN!!" Steph was forcing spiked mushroom soup down Alan's throat when the doorbell rang. She looked out the window to see Sonia loitering about.
"What the flamin eck?! Gotta get rid of the little cow" Steph opened the door to greet Sonia.. with a knife hid behind her back.

"Can I elp you darlin'?"
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Old 06-10-2004, 22:32
lather
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Sonia barged in pushing Steph aside. Steph stumbled backwards, slipping on some of the mushroom soup that had spilt in her haste to finish off Alan.

"Faming eck" screamed Steph as she was knifed by the fall.

Sonia was distraught ( for a few moments only as she did not like Emmerdale) and remembered why she had come.

Hearing fresh screaming, Sonia went past the lifeless body of Steph and down to the cellar where Sonia found Shelley.

Shelley thanked her and realising who she was, asked her how her daughter Sarah was!

Sarah was Shelley and Alan's lovechild and this is why Steph hated them both.

The relief of being freed lasted briefly and was interrupted by the shrieks of a bloody Steph blocking their only escape with a knife.

"Yer for it now bitches".................

Last edited by lather : 06-10-2004 at 22:32. Reason: o
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Old 07-10-2004, 11:04
Dippit
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Martin had arrived in Weatherfield where he had prmoptly run into Sean Tully. Sean introduced him to his sister...Susan Tully.

"Woah...you look just like my Sista....MEECHELLE!"

"Come here Big boy!" Said Susan, and the two promptly went at it like rabbits in the middle of the Red Rec.

After the deed was done, Susan called her mother...Pauline! Susan was indeed Martin's sister Michelle!!!!

"Oh Michelle...Martins gone missing...can you look for him?" Pauline said.

"But Mum....I don't know what he looks like...since the recasted the part a year after I moved to America!" Michelle said.

Martin was aghast at hearing this conversation...for he had just slept with his sister!

Meanwhile, back in Emmerdale, Steph was angry...

"Yer for it now bitches".................Steph said, repeating the last thing she had said in the previous episode just because the writer couldn't come up with anything decent for her character.
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Old 07-10-2004, 13:43
Jay-H
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Back in EastEnders, Demi was crying.

'My baby! Where is she?'

Sarah clutched the baby alien in her hands.

'THIS ONE'S MINE!'

She then promptly skipped backwards but ended up falling into...
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:29
lather
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Originally Posted by Dippit
"Yer for it now bitches".................Steph said
Steph lunged for Sonia and Shelley, but the combination of the staircase,blood and soup proved too much as she landed at the bottom with a crack of bones.

"Oh my gawd" gaspedSonia, she has broken her neck. There is no pulse. She dead.

Shelley was so relieved as her lifetime of torture in the hands of Steph was over.

"Alan, is he ok, please be ok." said Shelly, ( looking radiant as the continuity team had failed once again to keep her bedraggled look.)

Sonia and Shelley ran up the stairs to find Alan, who was unconcious after the drugged soup.

"Is he ok Sonia" asked Shelley who loved Alan. "Yes, he's breathing.Thank God.", nurse Sonia said triumphantly.

With Alan safe and Steph dead, Sonia said her goodbyes to Sarah's mother. She'd had enough. Pauline was bad enough, she did not need more aggro.

Sonia bade her farewell thinking that the Dales were nicer than Watford. She would be back ( if she ever was sacked )

Sonia headed back to Albert Square but was met by an alarming sight.

Sarah, holding a baby, was violently shaking the ladder that Pauline was on. Pauline was holding on for her life......

Will she survive the latest threat to her immortality in the Square..................

duh duh duh


( please continue, and avoid gratuitous sex etc. Keep it clean.

Last edited by lather : 07-10-2004 at 14:43. Reason: o
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:34
Jay-H
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'GET OFF!' wailed Sonia, running up.

'Help me!' shouted Pauline nervously, shaking.

'You WILL DIE!' screamed Sarah, giving the ladder a huge shake. Pauline's hand slipped and she hurtled down the ladder, landing at the bottom on her head with a sickening crack.

'Now if you don't mind,' said Sarah, unmoved, 'I have a baby to look after. Martin's baby.'

She walked off leaving Sonia feeling a mix of terror, shock and anger.
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:36
Dippit
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Martin, wanted to escape the incestous occurances in Weatherfield and returned to Walford just in time to see Pauline fall to her death.

"Oh my god! My mum's dead!"

"Oh well" Sarah said, she won't be missed! Now we got a baby to look after!"

Just then...Demi arrived!

"Hey you! Thats my baby! Give it back!"

Demi and Sarah got into a fight over the baby...and Martin and Sonia decided to head over to the Queen Vic to tell everyone about Pauline.

They arrived at the Vic to find it myseriously closed...they went back to see Pauline's lifeless body on the ground...

Last edited by Dippit : 07-10-2004 at 14:45. Reason: Had to rewrite my episode because I was beaten to the punch!
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:38
Jay-H
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Yes well.. uhh they're similar! Someone continue to either!
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:40
Dippit
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Don't worry I changed mine
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:42
lather
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But she wasn't dead.

Pauline hit the ground in the agile apelike manner that had become associated with her. The scriptwriters had a gory end for Pauline, but not this way, not yet..............

"Mum, I'm so sorry", wailed Martin.

Sarah looked at Sonia and burst into tears. "You, you, you ......" she seethed. "It's your fault! Leave Martin and my family alone. He doesn't want youanymore."

"Tell her Martin", she screamed.

Close up of Martin's anguished face. What could he do now.........
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:42
Jay-H
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Suddenly a storm cloud loomed and it got dark.

Tense music started playing.

'What's with that music,' Sonia said irritably.
'Dunno,' said Martin mysteriously.

Suddenly from the shadows.....
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Old 07-10-2004, 14:47
Dippit
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Arthur appeared!

"Ohhh Arrrthur! You're alive!" Pauline said.

"Yes...Ive been secretly in cryogenic freeze for the past eight years! Happy to see me?" Arthur said.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" Pauline said.
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