Yesterday, went with a relative who had her cat put to sleep. It was also in one respect my first pet, so I had a sentimental attachment to him. She couldn't stay with him whilst he was injected so I did. Wish I hadn't. All I could see last night in bed every time I shut my eyes was him collapsing as the injection hit him, and the fact he didn't even struggle.

I'm ashamed to say that as a 27 year old man I cried last night 5 times and on the verge again today numerous times.

Does it get better with time? It was the right thing to do, he was losing weight rapidly and was in pain so I know that in the long term it was right.

First of all *big hugs*! It is a horrible time when a beloved pet has to be put to sleep.
I personally have never been there when any of my family pets have been put to sleep as i knew i wouldn't be able to handle it, but then having said that i have actually ended up regretted not being there for them in their last few minutes.
It will get better, and i think at a time like this you just have to keep telling yourself that it was for the best & that you wouldn't want them to suffer any more.
Just try and think of the good times - i know when my mum had the family husky put to sleep she then got a nice framed picture of him to remember him by which i think helped a bit.

Take care & just remember it was for the best x

I'm sorry for your loss. We love our animals, they are members of our family so it is a loss and it will run its course.

I was with my dog on my own when he had to be put to sleep a few weeks ago, hubby was away and our old boy had really deteriorated so it had to be done. I just held him in my arms. We were all devastated and I know I miss him alot but I also have lots of happy memories of him. We had his ashes scattered in the woods and we have lovely pictures of him.

We took the decision to adopt another dog as the house felt so empty. He isn't our old boy but he's filling that hole in his own way and we love him to bits.

Cry when you feel like it and at some point you will laugh through the tears at all your happy memories

No need to be ashamed just because you are a man, I find it quite warming that you have felt that way so cry when you feel the need,

Yes it does get better, you'll never quite forget that moment but it does become easier, and you will find contentment in time knowing the joy he brought to everyone and that you did the right thing. <<<<<hugs>>>>> to you Ocado

I'm in my 50s and I cried when we had to have one of our beloved cats put to sleep back in August.

Thank god for digital cameras as our pets really do live on.

Aww, don't feel ashamed. Your cat was a big part of your life. They really do become a part of the family. Speaking as somebody who lost a pet only last week, I know how you feel.

Cry as much as you need to.

((hug))

my first post in the pets forum the title caught my eye Does it get better?
i hope so
i had to put my best mate Charlie put to sleep on Thursday he suddenly took i'll having a fit
he was the heart and sole of the family and was with us for 12yrs and grew up with my grandkids through this time who are aged from 13 to new born
he followed them all around the house and garden etc he slept with them all as kids when they had a nap on the settee etc

never no trouble one amazing Dog i'm devastated about this waking up seeing him at 6am on Thursday morning in such a state was truly heartbreaking
ringing the vets emergency number for advice they talked through what to do he eventually he settled down and seemed to be ok so we were given an 8.30 am emergency appointment
in this time he got to his feet and seemed to be getting back to his old self

after a hour or so he stopped walking around and wasn't himself his face sunk in and he started to vomit by this time the family had been called and came to support him/us he didnt greet them
that wasn't him at all
at the vets he went straight in..his condition was terminal...
Thanks from a guy who has cried buckets in the last 2 days

this has just topped off an awful year for us the sooner 2011 has gone the better

It does get better. Well it did for me anyway. My very first pet was a hamster when I was 16, and he died exactly 5 months after we got him. I was so devastated. It didn't help that I'd just come out of hospital that year as well and he died really suddenly. He had wet tail and his intestine became prolapsed. Now I'm able to remember the fond memories of his short life (and I've also had several other pets since then).


The emotional pain from losing a loved pet will be raw, but over time will hopefully heal over.

Thanks for the replies, glad that it will get better with time. I must admit last night, I forgot for a few minutes and went out looking for him. Hit me after 10 minutes of looking he was gone.

<<<hugs>>>> to you rossi_dr and RIP Charlie

Yes, it gets better, but it takes time. Well done for staying with the cat, and hopefully you can begin to take comfort that his end didn't distress him or hurt him. How is your relative doing? Have you talked with them about him? That can help as well.

Just had a thought today: what sort of cost is cremation? Relative said she wanted them to take care of that, and never thought of asking what cost would be. I looked and saw a quote of £85 on one site for the South West so she is expecting a bill of over £150 now for consultation, putting to sleep and then cremation. She's not having the ashes back though or a memorial plot so should be cheaper.

Thanks for the support again, cried a few more times. Not sleeping well, keep seeing him when I shut them.

I'm sending out a massive hug for you hunni. NO...don't ever be ashamed to cry, in fact it is good cause it lets it out even if it's for a spilt second. In the end you did what you had to do....if he was gonna be in pain then him being pts was the right thing. No one would want their cat to live yrs and yrs but suffer horribly, i'd rather put them to rest and they go somewhere safe rather than have the cat for yrs but he/she be in pain. You did what you had to do, even though he wasn't yours...you had this attachment to him so it felt like he was yours. Your relative, the owner had to make this choice and at least you stay with him. You were the last one that cat saw, you stayed with him in his final second. your relative couldn't cause sometimes it's harder to stay.

Yes in time the pain will ease, right now...im not gonna lie but yes it will feel like it'll never get better. But time is a major healer. Let your emotions out, cry a thousand times if need be, just remember the good times the cat shared with his owner and you. As each day passes you will begin to feel better and you'll cry less. But am sure through out the rest of your life you will have moments where you will suddenly burst into tears and thats nothing to be ashamed of. I lost my cat Suschi over 8wks ago and for the 1st 2wks i cried everyday, every hour and one day i realised i was starting to feel a little bit better...and now i'm ok. Yes i have my moments, i will always cry even if it's once a year i know i wil.

Just smile at times you shared with him. He was loved by you and his owner. Stay strong hunni xx

We had Akuma cremated and his ashes back, it cost £95.

It does get better, it's only been a few weeks since Akuma died but I can think about him without crying now although sometimes I feel myself filling up.

Someone told me I needed to get a new monster to fill the empty space, turns out it was good advice

I have a 13 year old german shepherd. Hip dysplasia is slowly setting in and he looks quite sad within himself.
He does not seem to be in pain but he cant walk very far at all now, he is rather stiff walking and esp lying down and getting back up. I think his time has come.
I've been lucky having a large pedigree dog thats made it to 13 years old without one single health problem and this is killing me, i'm gutted that i'm about to lose my boy but I refuse to see him in pain.
Ive heard other people in the past say that you know when a dog is ready to die because of the way it looks at you, just that knowing look between you both.....well, i'm sure he has given me "the look"
Has anybody else ever been given "the look" by their dog (or cat)?

Posted my long post in the wrong thread but I just wanted to say sorry about your relatives cat. Such a hard decision to make and do not feel wrong for crying. Just shows you are a lovely guy with feelings. xx

The cat I posted about did. Another relative told me that cats struggle if they want to carry on, but he just sat there and let the vet inject him. He just looked at me as if to say 'about time'. As I said, in the long term it was the right thing but at the moment it is not much of a comfort.

Feels wrong to come down in the morning and not have him wailing for more food; I miss it. As much as I hated the incessant noise, it is amazing how much you miss it when it isn't there.

You were with him right to the end.
I'm glad you stayed with him as he wouldn't have wanted to be alone with a vet he didn't even know, you being right there with him would have been comfort for him IMO.
I'm afraid theres no magic cure for hurt and pain, time is a healer and thats the fact of it. I know thats not what you want to hear right now, you feel like you need a quick cure to make the hurt go away. Wish I could give that to you hun, I really do. Your'e just gonna have to ride this one out and it will definitely get easier with a little time.
Its not fair keeping animals who are in pain but some people can't face losing their pet and keep them for longer than they should. You however did the right thing, you knew he was in pain and you fixed it for him to just fall asleep and never feel pain ever again.
Take comfort in all the laughs you got from him, when he was being daft or when he was being a proper little sh*t, think of those kinda things and remember that when he needed help most you were right there by his side.

Tell me about it. We take many things for granted and when it's gone...thats when we feel the awful pain. When i last saw my Suschi alive...i didnt notice 'the look' until after she'd gone. I assumed the vets would repair the damage and all would be well. After we buried her...i remembered...as i left the room where we saw the vet i looked back and smiled at Suschi and she just peered back at me, before i never realised it but i now see that she looked at me as if to say 'it's my time now...i can't fight any longer'. Talking about it now it's making me drop a few tears. Over 8wks on and i'm still in such a huge shock about it all.

Thanks for the reply's.
nearly a week on were getting there
the Grandkids ask for him and our Yorkie sits at the stairs door
looking for Charlie that sets me off.grrr

Cremation costs

receipt for Charlie shows
£20.75 Cremation for Dog under 20kg
and vet fee £40.00
Total £60.75

It varies with where you are and what sort of cremation you have and what happens to the ashes - do you let the crem scatter them, or have them back, and if you have them back what are they in? Rung my local pet crem last week as I thought my old cat was very near his end (he has perked up wonderfully at least for the time being) and they charge either £85 or £95 (can't remember which) with the ashes coming back in a basic scatter box.

Im sorry to hear you've lost your precious Suschi, be strong and when you're thinking of her refuse to let yourself think of anything else other than the good times and the times she made you laugh or smile
Regarding the part i've bolded above, that's exactly how I felt when my dog looked at me earlier...I know that he knows it's his time to go, he looks tired and weary in those big brown eyes

Well i left that vets thinking Suschi would be fine within days but then we were told she needs an operation but Suschi would be fine once they repaired the damage, but sadly when they had to open her up...there was further damage beyond repair and the vet said that she was simply a 'mess inside' nothing could be repaired to the extent where she will live and healthy happy life....she would have lasted a week, days even if they repaired the damage and she would be in pain...so they let her go whilst she was under anesthetic, there was simpy no point to bring her round and then put her to sleep. I hate it, i absolutely hate it cause i felt i'd see her again. Speaking about it really does devestate me and i want her back...to cuddle her soft warm furr. She was soooo docile and wouldn't hurt a fly. I used to say and still do say i'd give anything, anything in the world to have her back.

Your dog is still alive....still fighting. Comfort him as much as you can, just be with him. He'll love the attention im sure.

Big hugs to you I am so sorry for your loss.
In answer to your question I lost my georgeous dog Benson and my beautiful cat Maisie both in the space of 3 months last year. At the time I felt so devastated I even started a thread on here saying I would never ever have another four legged furry friend again as I didnt think I could go through the heartbreak of losing another pet.

It took a while but I am now the proud owner of a beautiful Staffordshire bull terrier called Ronnie, Although our house is feeling like a home again with our new doggy addition You will never forget the ones who have gone.

Got the bill today, it was £76.05 so not as bad as she was expecting it to be. Only got charged for the putting to sleep and cremation, which was £31. The actual putting to sleep (or euthanasia as they called it) was £44.