Wow! check you out

Nah I am pretty horrible tbh, I've been told that twice today

I'm a bit tipsy already, alcohol is a good lubricant in my opinion

Please never mention that substance again. I'm still emotionally scarred from the time I found some in the bathroom cupboard at home (parents). LOL!

It's yummy!

I dunno, I wouldn't want to be thinking of Del Boy while doing the deed..

I was underwhelmed by flavoured condoms to be honest, let alone lube. I think it ruins a perfectly fine taste. I'm going to stop there...

Out of interest, is it Polyisoprene that you have a taste for, or cock?

Curious minds have to enquire you see.

LMAO.

Well a d**k doesn't really taste of anything until you get the cotnents of inside out of it

I know, we'll be making love before long.

Yeah, you were horrible to me once, I remember you got a lift home to yours off one of your mates and you made me walk, bitch.

I thought as much, but you never know who has a latex fetish, and how far they'll go with it.


Would that not depend on how clean it was...

I was behind the pharmacy one day at work, why are people so keen to show you their private parts? I'm not even butterfly trained!

Oh good grief. Just FYI, it has to be clean.

I am actually going to stop now. Lol

Lol, it's all Jack's fault, he's a bad influence.

Leave my Jackary alone you.

Y'all turned us into horny pests (although Jackary already was tbf)

All the way back to Manchester, although I offered to walk home with you, you declined because you didn't want to move your lazy ass so I kindly offered accomodation in my bedroom

Apparently I am hprrible though, first time by the douches of my year, in PE (which unfortunately is the class I'm on my own in filled with chino *******) and they're so nasty in the way they target me, the teacher knows their game and is helpful but he leaves us unattended so it's like a free for all as my "teamates" go to one side while I dodge the other teams balls, they go for my head most of the time. When I say to them WTF is their problem they take the moral highground and claim that I'm cold/bitter and haven't got a sense of humour. Yeah because trying to hit me in the face with rubber balls is hillarious

Doesn't bother me what they do/think tbh, in the knowledge that if I caught any of them on their own they wouldn't do/say s**t.

Then my name was mentioned in a tweet along with my friends outside school, this little skank in 6th year was calling my friends junkies, whores etc and said I'm an eye sore and something out a zoo apparently.

MY reply - Have you seen a mirror lately hen?

I wouldn't mind sucking a sweaty jock cock at all...

Yous do know how to calm me down when I'm mad (not fesity mad, just #punchingthewallandyellingouchmyf**kinghand)

See below for proof of this..


Haha, well if it was stale sweat I'd find it a bit objectionable, but otherwise...

And I nearly obliged

You always loved getting hit in the face by my balls. what a load of bellends, I'l sort em out for you <3.

Yeah, you tell the silly whore, I'l take her down as well. <3

I already had proof, Jase.

But I do agree with him on that matter in hand.

Well why didn't you? I throw myself at you and you turn me down, what are you straight?

Doesn't bother me in the slightest, partly because I don't ever have to see them after I've done my exams and also partly because I was so mad at how they upset one of my other friends (this one goes to my school lol) and I can proudly say that I on my own took out two people before getting hit in the stomach.

I used to play with your balls all the time, you liked a bit of sado on them didn't you, ya wee dirty

And that I did, I completely bitched her out in Drama. I tell you for someone as sensitve and insecure as me I can be a total Ice Queen/King when I want to be, I thank my mother for teahing me what is it to be passive aggressive

Normally I wouldn't like that either but if this asked me to suck his nasty cock then I like... would...

There's a shock.


I'd like to think that I'd maintain my usual standards, but if the opportunity presented itself, one couldn't be sure how they'd react..

Yeah, I like Vagina, I've been stringing you all along for a year, nice knowing you <3.

Yeah, I was like that with high school, don't talk to half the knobheads from my school anymore <3.

I did not

I know you can be an Ice King, I'd be frightened if I got into a proper argument with you. Yay for mummy.

What you trying to say?

F**k you Luke, f**k you

I don't think I'll be speaking to anyone apart from Alex, Jenny, Vicky, Bobby & Shannon (Love Shannon, she's like the only girl at school not prudish about sex, me/her just compare our boyfriends and what he's doing/not doing for her.) apart from them the rest can kiss my ass

Oohh but you pretended to like it because I was like so into electrocution and my experiments on the human flesh back then and you let me do it just to make me happy... well what can I say, your a wonderful humain being

Yeah, she can be a proper bitch at times but I've realised that actually, a lot of my mannerisms have came from her, like making sarcastic stabbing comments with a smile. She's made me the male diva I am now

Lol, well, while the idea didn't exactly excite me, it's a different thing when it's not just an idea..