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Emma Chawner - the new Jade Goody? (Part 10)


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Old 31-12-2012, 23:17
greengran
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Geez, I have noticed this thread over the past 2 years I have lurked here but as I do not subscribe to SKY I cannot boast the pleasure of having watched the daily life of this car crash of a family on telelvision.
I saw the parents and sister when Emma auditioned for X Factor....her dad made her dress....Emma looked like a large cupie doll that the carnival could not get rid of even as a boobie prize...
Watching them on telelvision for entertainment would be, to me, like being one of those who queued outside Bethlem Royal Hospital in the 18th century to gawp at the deranged and mentally disturbed.
And if you ask if I count the Chawners in such a category I would say...yes.
You can see clips of the Chawners on You tube. There are quite a few and you will understand our fascination and repulsion if you watch them.

Happy New Year to all the C o C and all Chawner fans everywhere.
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Old 31-12-2012, 23:34
tally
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Happy New Year all C of Cers.

To all the regulars, folks who have wondered how the hell this thread has gone to 10 parts! ( it's the posters not the Chawns) to Lovely_Lady whose brief appearances leave us chuckling if not baffled whether he/she is being serious or not. If they're trolling they have failed miserably To all lurkers and people who may think we are being mean and cruel, generally we're not. It's not us with the ASBO'S or "Straining Orders" chucking our dog's poo into next door. We've had poems, songs and all manner of things which may be Chawner themed, but not malicious in the way that some forums can be. It was hard during the 3rd series ( aka "Bio's Revenge) but there you are.
What we've tried to do is have a giggle and a laugh, while thanking the powers above that our lives are relatively normal and what an incentive not to let us get as fat or as entitled as them.
Whoever you are, I hope 2013 is a stonker of a year for you.
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Old 01-01-2013, 01:40
Boq
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I found the first 2 series on hulu and with a proxy managed to finally see this. I only watched the first 2 episodes. Audrey not being able to walk the dog because she had to plan the tv schedule??? Phil looking shocked then ecstatic when he passed wind!!! I daren't watch any more. But I will.
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Old 01-01-2013, 11:22
dorahall
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I found the first 2 series on hulu and with a proxy managed to finally see this. I only watched the first 2 episodes. Audrey not being able to walk the dog because she had to plan the tv schedule??? Phil looking shocked then ecstatic when he passed wind!!! I daren't watch any more. But I will.
You know you will, they are almost as addictive as Pringles.

I love the Chawners. They have made me realise my family is lovely, we genuinely have affection and consideration for each other, my house is occasionally untidy but there has never been 16 cardboard boxes behind the settee or a stained mattress propped against the wall in the living room. I am also not a perfect 10 (yet) but I am not morbidly obese with all the associated health problems. Life is good when you're not a Chawn.
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Old 01-01-2013, 11:59
chili_kitten
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Ooh, it seems Emma's got a job! She says on facebook she's working today, along with an insincere apology to say she'll only reveal where to close friends and family.
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Old 01-01-2013, 12:05
dorahall
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Ooh, it seems Emma's got a job! She says on facebook she's working today, along with an insincere apology to say she'll only reveal where to close friends and family.
It'll be part of her community service, for harassing the neighbour back in the summer. I expect she's hosing vomit off the the streets of Great Harwood, wearing a high visibility jacket and clutching laminated photos of herself to hand out to fans.
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Old 01-01-2013, 12:15
orangesmartie
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It'll be part of her community service, for harassing the neighbour back in the summer. I expect she's hosing vomit off the the streets of Great Harwood, wearing a high visibility jacket and clutching laminated photos of herself to hand out to fans.
ooh how i wish i lived close enough to go looking for her!
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Old 01-01-2013, 13:34
lotty27
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Ooh, it seems Emma's got a job! She says on facebook she's working today, along with an insincere apology to say she'll only reveal where to close friends and family.
That's just family then?
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Old 01-01-2013, 14:12
dorahall
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ooh how i wish i lived close enough to go looking for her!
I'd go and vomit on the pavement purposefully, just to watch her hose it off. Then I'd throw some dog poo in her garden and ask her dad if he has a hard on.
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Old 01-01-2013, 15:47
kiviraat
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Ooh, it seems Emma's got a job! She says on facebook she's working today, along with an insincere apology to say she'll only reveal where to close friends and family.
Emma blocked me for some reason. All I did was send her a friend's request Right, where can folk think of in Greater Harwood that's open on New Years Day? Chinese? Kebab shop?

That's just family then?
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Old 01-01-2013, 15:48
Gaz.Baz
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anyone think there will ever be a 4th series?
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Old 01-01-2013, 16:30
Saltydog1955
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anyone think there will ever be a 4th series?

The clue's in the title of the 3rd series - The Chawners LAST CHANCE. On the first episode they were shown being told by the commissioning editor of Bio and Director Dan that they had to lose weight or no more programmes.

They didn't, so there wasn't and very probably won't be in future. Phil still likes to keep up the pretence of them doing a ''Japanese reality show'' though.
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Old 01-01-2013, 17:30
dorahall
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anyone think there will ever be a 4th series?
Nope.

But there IS a Japanese reality show in the offing. Allegedly.

But most of us think the Chawners have been conned into thinking this is a genuine prospect.

Like they bragged about being interviewed on New Zealand radio and it turned out to be an amateur radio broadcast by a 12 year old boy in his Nan's back bedroom.
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Old 01-01-2013, 18:34
EMC1983
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Nope.

But there IS a Japanese reality show in the offing. Allegedly.

But most of us think the Chawners have been conned into thinking this is a genuine prospect.

Like they bragged about being interviewed on New Zealand radio and it turned out to be an amateur radio broadcast by a 12 year old boy in his Nan's back bedroom.
hahaha thats brilliant!!
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Old 01-01-2013, 19:03
Jerrica09
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I found the first 2 series on hulu and with a proxy managed to finally see this. I only watched the first 2 episodes. Audrey not being able to walk the dog because she had to plan the tv schedule??? Phil looking shocked then ecstatic when he passed wind!!! I daren't watch any more. But I will.
Isn't hulu an American site? What are the Chawners doing on there?
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Old 01-01-2013, 19:43
dorahall
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Isn't hulu an American site? What are the Chawners doing on there?
Good Lord, have our Chawnz gone global without anyone noticing?
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Old 01-01-2013, 19:45
Boq
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Isn't hulu an American site? What are the Chawners doing on there?
It is, yes. I was surprised that they were there, but I'm glad they are as I finally get to watch them. I've just finished series one and I'm speechless.

I just need to find Chawner's Last Chance now.
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Old 01-01-2013, 21:18
Skaface
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Hello, may I wish a very Happy New Year to all my fellow CoC'ers including all our new recruits (and say welcome to you too!)

Dorahall ~ you appear to have already voiced the same thought as me ~ in that If our delightful Emma really is working today, then it could very well be because she has been ordered to do Community Service as a result of the court case last year over the unfortunate incident with the x-maj and the jug.

I think it's highly unlikely she would be working on a Bank Holiday otherwise, as we've all seen and heard her mother's views on what Bank Holidays are for ~ they're for doing absolutely nothing, apart from sitting in front of the TV and not moving all day!

Boq, I really don't know whether to congratulate you or commiserate with you over your recent discovery of this dysfuntional family, but seeing as you have bravely already watched series one (and apparently survived the trauma of it! ), why not try to watch series two and save series three (Last Chance ~ imo the best), till last?

Happy Chawnering to you all!
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Old 01-01-2013, 22:15
kiviraat
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It is, yes. I was surprised that they were there, but I'm glad they are as I finally get to watch them. I've just finished series one and I'm speechless.

I just need to find Chawner's Last Chance now.
I tried to watch on Hulu but every time I tried a new proxy it knew what I was up to, the sod
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Old 01-01-2013, 23:38
Boq
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I tried to watch on Hulu but every time I tried a new proxy it knew what I was up to, the sod
I use media hint on Firefox. It's worked fine so far.

I'll work my way through series 2 then I'll have to try and hunt down the third series as that isn't on hulu.
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Old 02-01-2013, 01:03
greengran
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Hello, may I wish a very Happy New Year to all my fellow CoC'ers including all our new recruits (and say welcome to you too!)

Dorahall ~ you appear to have already voiced the same thought as me ~ in that If our delightful Emma really is working today, then it could very well be because she has been ordered to do Community Service as a result of the court case last year over the unfortunate incident with the x-maj and the jug.

I think it's highly unlikely she would be working on a Bank Holiday otherwise, as we've all seen and heard her mother's views on what Bank Holidays are for ~ they're for doing absolutely nothing, apart from sitting in front of the TV and not moving all day!

Boq, I really don't know whether to congratulate you or commiserate with you over your recent discovery of this dysfuntional family, but seeing as you have bravely already watched series one (and apparently survived the trauma of it! ), why not try to watch series two and save series three (Last Chance ~ imo the best), till last?

Happy Chawnering to you all!
Emma could always be working as a carer, you have to start early for that.I'm sure she'd be very good as a carer and really look after her clients, wash them carefully and treat them with compassion,.I can just see her now. I wonder if Phil follows her to work and stands glowering while she does her job.
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Old 02-01-2013, 08:54
Saltydog1955
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Perhaps Emma's doing this.

Emma works as a mobile hairdresser, seeing five or six clients a week. When itís quiet at work, she volunteers in a charity shop a couple of days a week.

http://www.closeronline.co.uk/RealLi...s-at-last.aspx
I expect Phil won't be far away.
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Old 02-01-2013, 09:28
jerseyporter
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Hello, may I wish a very Happy New Year to all my fellow CoC'ers including all our new recruits (and say welcome to you too!)

Dorahall ~ you appear to have already voiced the same thought as me ~ in that If our delightful Emma really is working today, then it could very well be because she has been ordered to do Community Service as a result of the court case last year over the unfortunate incident with the x-maj and the jug.

I think it's highly unlikely she would be working on a Bank Holiday otherwise,
as we've all seen and heard her mother's views on what Bank Holidays are for ~ they're for doing absolutely nothing, apart from sitting in front of the TV and not moving all day!

Boq, I really don't know whether to congratulate you or commiserate with you over your recent discovery of this dysfuntional family, but seeing as you have bravely already watched series one (and apparently survived the trauma of it! ), why not try to watch series two and save series three (Last Chance ~ imo the best), till last?

Happy Chawnering to you all!
BIB: Re Community Service - if the UK is anything like Jersey, Community Service is actually suspended for three weeks over the Christmas period, plus they'd never have it on a Bank Holiday either. My best friend is a Community Service supervisor over here and he's never been asked to work on a Bank Holiday, they just move it to another day in the same week.

Which leaves the rather disconcerting notion that Emma might actually be working!! I know, scary thought, isn't it!
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Old 02-01-2013, 10:01
dorahall
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If she is working, then I hope her father isn't sitting outside in the car, watching her, to make sure no brave young man dares speak to his princess.
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Old 02-01-2013, 17:21
kiviraat
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I use media hint on Firefox. It's worked fine so far.

I'll work my way through series 2 then I'll have to try and hunt down the third series as that isn't on hulu.
Once I was blind, but now I SEE!! Thank you

If she is working, then I hope her father isn't sitting outside in the car, watching her, to make sure no brave young man dares speak to his princess.
It's so sinister, but I very much believe that he actually would do that *shudder*
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