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Old 15-06-2012, 21:25
vpower
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I was picking my son up from 6th form college last year and as he approached the car I could see that he was angry and upset. It transpired that 2 girls (themselves from an ethnic minority who would undoubtedly have experienced prejudice) had sneered and sniggered at him, calling him a weirdo and a freak.

I was livid and had to be restrained by him as I was all for getting out of the car to tear them to shreds (verbally I hasten to add). He didn't want me to say anything as it would make everything worse and wouldn't let me report them to the college principal. This was because they were protected due to their ethnicity and that it would stir up a hornet's nest!

My son then told me that many people were just the same and that he didn't say anything to me because he knew I would get upset.

I would like to say though that my lad has a wide circle of supportive friends, the family were brilliant when they found out and he has spent his gap year working abroad (in stealth and no-one has suspected anything).

He is set for uni in September (maths and philosophy) and life is good.

WD I too think that persistently and maliciously calling transgendered HMs by their previous gender should mean an immediate and permanent ban.
You're son sounds like a lovely rounded person. He obviously picked it up from his parents
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Old 15-06-2012, 21:39
zeebra
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yes, I think the banana gets more attention than Luke. Oh well. I think the three peaks race covering Ben Nevis, Snowdon and Kilamanjairo would be challenging.
LOL. Ye Gods - the ignorance.
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Old 15-06-2012, 21:41
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yes, I think the banana gets more attention than Luke. Oh well. I think the three peaks race covering Ben Nevis, Snowdon and Kilamanjairo would be challenging.
Haha yes I'll have to try that one. I doubt geography is Arron's strongest subject and has he brought any t shirts into the BB house, I don't think I I have seen him with a top on the whole time he has been in there.

Hopefully, once Arron or Chris leaves next week, more attention will be given to other housemates and I hope they give Luke an individual task to do, like they have for many of the other housemates.
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Old 15-06-2012, 21:46
zeebra
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You're son sounds like a lovely rounded person. He obviously picked it up from his parents
That's a really lovely thing to say. Before I knew I sometimes wondered how I would cope if one of my kids was gay or something. I imagined I would be devastated and truth to tell that is just how I felt when I realised what was going on with my lad but I have supported him unconditionally since.

You do adjust and it becomes the norm - although it took his dad much longer to accept the situation.
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Old 15-06-2012, 23:22
luv-em-all
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yes, I think the banana gets more attention than Luke. Oh well. I think the three peaks race covering Ben Nevis, Snowdon and Kilamanjairo would be challenging.
Ohh Wonkey, that was hilarious never mind, Tanzania is on their minds cos Cheryl dun it! To be young again
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Old 15-06-2012, 23:34
wonkeydonkey
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: and has he brought any t shirts into the BB house, I don't think I I have seen him with a top on the whole time he has been in there.

.
That made me laugh.

Luke: "I'll give you a hand with your suitcase if you like."
Arron: "It won't take long. To be honest, I've worn everything I brought in."

Arron came in to the house with a suitcase containing one pair of shorts?
That's a really lovely thing to say. Before I knew I sometimes wondered how I would cope if one of my kids was gay or something. I imagined I would be devastated and truth to tell that is just how I felt when I realised what was going on with my lad but I have supported him unconditionally since.

You do adjust and it becomes the norm - although it took his dad much longer to accept the situation.
Good for both of you. Every time parents manage to treat it as normal and their child as just as loved it makes it a bit easier for the next person.
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Old 15-06-2012, 23:53
hulakula
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That made me laugh.

Luke: "I'll give you a hand with your suitcase if you like."
Arron: "It won't take long. To be honest, I've worn everything I brought in."

Arron came in to the house with a suitcase containing one pair of shorts?
Haha that's what I was thinking No wonder it didn't take long.

It was good to see Luke getting more airtime, he seems to have Becky and Luke S sussed. I hope this is a sign of things to come.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:12
zeebra
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I feel that he is getting trampled on and pushed out by all the gobby, attention seeking loudmouths at the moment. He often seems to be on the periphery of the action. Thank God for Lauren, who seems to really like him, and Adam too.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:21
vpower
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That's a really lovely thing to say. Before I knew I sometimes wondered how I would cope if one of my kids was gay or something. I imagined I would be devastated and truth to tell that is just how I felt when I realised what was going on with my lad but I have supported him unconditionally since.

You do adjust and it becomes the norm - although it took his dad much longer to accept the situation.
Damn, I said You're instead or Your! I'm usually OCD about spelling. Will blame the drink I have three boys myself and have also wondered about coping with one being gay. TBH that wouldn't bother me but never entered my mind to wonder about M2W situation. Hope I would deal with it like you
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:24
hulakula
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I feel that he is getting trampled on and pushed out by all the gobby, attention seeking loudmouths at the moment. He often seems to be on the periphery of the action. Thank God for Lauren, who seems to really like him, and Adam too.
Me too As I've mentioned before, he seems like a very polite and considerate person, it must be so frustrating for him to have his opinions drowned out by people less informed people than him, especially when they were writing the shopping list. He would have been the ideal person to decide what food the house needed.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:26
luv-em-all
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Damn, I said You're instead or Your! I'm usually OCD about spelling. Will blame the drink I have three boys myself and have also wondered about coping with one being gay. TBH that wouldn't bother me but never entered my mind to wonder about M2W situation. Hope I would deal with it like you
I am currently in that situ, m2f.......not myself, my son.

I just want her to be happy
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:26
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Me too As I've mentioned before, he seems like a very polite and considerate person, it must be so frustrating for him to have his opinions drowned out by people less informed people than him, especially when they were writing the shopping list. He would have been the ideal person to decide what food the house needed.
Like he said he is biting his tongue and it won't be long before he snaps. I just hope he does it in the right way and show them whose boss without coming across like Chris.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:29
vpower
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I am currently in that situ, m2f.......not myself, my son.
Hope it goes well for you both Mothers really are strong when it comes to their kids happiness. We only want what makes them happy. Good luck with it all
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:33
luv-em-all
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Hope it goes well for you both Mothers really are strong when it comes to their kids happiness. We only want what makes them happy. Good luck with it all
Thank you, so much!
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:35
hulakula
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Like he said he is biting his tongue and it won't be long before he snaps. I just hope he does it in the right way and show them whose boss without coming across like Chris.
I hope so Thankfully he seems to have a lot more tact than Chris, so hopefully he won't come across like him
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:35
zeebra
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I am currently in that situ, m2f.......not myself, my son.

I just want her to be happy
Exactly. The struggle they go through to get treatment and having to justify themselves to the professionals. It's a bloody minefield. We went privately eventually after getting totally p****d off with the NHS (not our GP as she has been wonderful).
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:38
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Exactly. The struggle they go through to get treatment and having to justify themselves to the professionals. It's a bloody minefield. We went privately eventually after getting totally p****d off with the NHS (not our GP as she has been wonderful).
How old was your son when he realised...and did he tell you straight away?
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:43
luv-em-all
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Exactly. The struggle they go through to get treatment and having to justify themselves to the professionals. It's a bloody minefield. We went privately eventually after getting totally p****d off with the NHS (not our GP as she has been wonderful).
Re gender-reassignment my son is pre-pubescent so they are talking about blockers. I have googled and searched and am still undecided.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:46
zeebra
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How old was your son when he realised...and did he tell you straight away?
He knew from about 8 years old, but had been a tomboy from being very young and would absolutely not wear a dress or skirt.

He had severe emotional problems with OCD, depression, self harm and sucidal thoughts between the ages of 8 and 17. I thought it was social anxiety for a while but then started to see certain pointers which eventually lead me to the realisation that he was transgendered.

I eventually engineered a discussion with him when he was 17 and he was so relieved that it was out in the open.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:48
Supersarahp
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He knew from about 8 years old, but had been a tomboy from being very young and would absolutely not wear a dress or skirt.

He had severe emotional problems with OCD, depression, self harm and sucidal thoughts between the ages of 8 and 17. I thought it was social anxiety for a while but then started to see certain pointers which eventually lead me to the realisation that he was transgendered.

I eventually engineered a discussion with him when he was 17 and he was so relieved that it was out in the open.
Wow - I just can't begin to imagine being in that position.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:51
luv-em-all
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He knew from about 8 years old, but had been a tomboy from being very young and would absolutely not wear a dress or skirt.

He had severe emotional problems with OCD, depression, self harm and sucidal thoughts between the ages of 8 and 17. I thought it was social anxiety for a while but then started to see certain pointers which eventually lead me to the realisation that he was transgendered.

I eventually engineered a discussion with him when he was 17 and he was so relieved that it was out in the open.
This began younger with my son and the self worth, even younger. Would it be OK to PM you please.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:53
zeebra
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Re gender-reassignment my son is pre-pubescent so they are talking about blockers. I have googled and searched and am still undecided.
I wish I had known earlier about our situation as I would have opted for them if they had been available. Having said that when we attended the Tavistock Clinic they told us that they didn't offer blockers. Maybe they have changed their protocol since then.

Best of luck with whatever you decide to do and I hope your little one has as easy a passage into adulthood as possible.
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:53
hulakula
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He knew from about 8 years old, but had been a tomboy from being very young and would absolutely not wear a dress or skirt.

He had severe emotional problems with OCD, depression, self harm and sucidal thoughts between the ages of 8 and 17. I thought it was social anxiety for a while but then started to see certain pointers which eventually lead me to the realisation that he was transgendered.

I eventually engineered a discussion with him when he was 17 and he was so relieved that it was out in the open.
It must have been awful for him at least he is fortunate enough to have such a caring, supportive mother who loves him unconditionally. It's good to see he is doing really well for himself and feels much happier now
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Old 16-06-2012, 00:55
zeebra
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This began younger with my son and the self worth, even younger. Would it be OK to PM you please.
Of course. I am off to bed any minute but will reply as soon as I log on tomorrow if you decide to PM me tonight.
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Old 16-06-2012, 01:02
zeebra
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It must have been awful for him at least he is fortunate enough to have such a caring, supportive mother who loves him unconditionally. It's good to see he is doing really well for himself and feels much happier now
Thanks. I know that these emotional disturbances are very common in transgendered youngsters and I can identify with some of Luke's behaviour in the house. For example his relationship with Luke S. My boy has had more difficulties with other young "laddish" types than with any other group. His friends are mainly from the gay community, or the sensitive nerdy types - and I love them all.
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