There's a patronising stereotype of your own.

Do you know, I woke up in a shite mood this morning, but i've just had a great laugh reading these posts.

Thanks guys. So looking forward to this.

deleted

sev-hen!

Tess talking to Louis; " you're a young fit hunk" " show us your guns" " isn't he fit ladies" repeat ad nauseum.

Tess talking to Vicky " is this scarier than the Olympics?" " You won an Olympic medal didn't you?" repeat ad nauseum

Tess " and this is Ohla definitely not Olla Jordan" repeat ad nauseum.

Craig and Darcey. I suspect Craig is a secret worshipper and its a pity he doesn't give his comments after Darcey has given hers, because I think I'd be waiting vainly for the 'Well actually I think you're wrong...'.

Darcey and Len. Every time Darcey makes a comment on technique that Len agrees with, will Darcey get a little verbal pat of approval?

Will Bruno feel left out and get a book out of the library on ballroom dancing?


Week 4, the producers give up with the cards and just put Bruce's autocue up on the screen wall at the back of the stage.
Tess wins her case at the industrial tribunal and gets her carer's fee.

Aliona gets 4 tens for Johnny's CCC week one. Johnny looks surprisingly muscled and fit, but isn't able to answer questions because of the gimp mask and the ball gag.

Dani has to bring her birth certificate to work to avoid Vincent having to sign on the register.

BBC news is covering Anton's arrival in Uganda seeking political asylum. His plea giving the reasons why he should not be sent back has the Ugandan population in tears.

Natalie uses the 3 weeks before the first show to have Richard checked into a cosmetic surgery clinic in Latvia, here his legs will be extended to make him 6' 4", his skin will be darkened, his head shaved and his balls increased in size to lower his voice.

Ok so 2 out of 3 of these have all ready been done and we have only had the launch show

Fern/Jonny will be doing it for the oldies and having enormous fun

the judges will insist that having previous dance experience in stage musicals makes NO DIFFERENCE

there will be injury porn with plinky piano music and VT of sad faces (and possibly even a lonely dance shoe)

James will tell the judges they know nothing

I'm confused again - I keep thinking Natalie got Richard. I'll wake up soon.

this is part stereotype part sad and inevitable consequence Colin will be told he sticks his bum out

And a pack of frozen peas

I've never understood why they don't say it the same way James does. Surely he knows how to say his wife's name. That said I don't know how they'd butcher the pronunciation of her full name. She probably thought Ola would be easier

Len will hate the props. Here they are in training will mean rock climbing, trip to the theatre or the pro having to shadow someone at work to pin them down for a few minutes training.

Even they couldn't get Aleksandra wrong! (Ola seems to be a stage name)

However her maiden name isn't that difficult either - Grabowska.

Yes, but can you imagine the mileage Bruce would get out of that!

Jordan is much safer for her

They are exotic names.