[CJM91]

Originally Posted by bazaar1

I repeat, that often those that move into flats with children have little other options (not all, but many) its not a case of they should move because they have kids, and it is not a case of being inconsiderate. It's a case of needing a roof over thier heads.

I would much rather have a family next door than the idiots I have there atm, perhaps they are inconsiderate and should move as they are childless and don't need the house and garden? Shall I suggest to to them?

And the fact that you called a child 'it' proves you have no idea about children at all.

a hypothetical child is neither a he or she, i wouldnt refer to a real kid as it!

your too easily offended, I think you should read my edit too because I missed something off

all noisy neighbours should clean up their act or move, can we not agree with that? living in a flat requires compromise for not constant noise, if you have a noisy lifestyle ie have kids you shouldnt live somewhere that noise is going to terrorise others lives

i accept not everyone can afford a house, however ideally they'd move to another area with cheaper family accomadation and poor people with kids tend to be alot better off than poor people without

[chrisii2011]

Originally Posted by Christian_Grey

Some noise is to be expected yes. Maybe the odd door slamming, the odd argument. What is however inconsiderate and unnaceptable is Kids constantly kicking a football around in the house. There are PLENTY of other ways children can alleviate boredom. They can read, watch a film or just do some bloody homework. But I expect that's too much hard work for most people these days so they just let their children run riot with no regard for those around them.

Thankyou!!! that sums it up!! Christ,i used to sit down with books,or play board games or watch TV!! And i was perfectly happy. Starting to wonder whether they have hyperactivity problems,there are other kids around here who are quiet and get on without disrupting others

[koantemplation]

What's wrong with teaching children to respect their neighbours?

It is because we have children growing up to believe they can do no wrong, that we are in the mess we are with yobs.

[chrisii2011]

Originally Posted by koantemplation

What's wrong with teaching children to respect their neighbours?

It is because we have children growing up to believe they can do no wrong, that we are in the mess we are with yobs.

Exactly, no wonder theres so much trouble out there

[Tackomacko]

some kids are def louder than some, my niece is a quiet wee thing, plays very well, but her brother is LOUD, everything he does is loud, stomps about talking at the top of his voice crashing into things, falling over and breaking things, and honestly i dont think he can help it.

But living under that must be an absolute nightmare, an impossible situation.

[Christian_Grey]

Originally Posted by Tackomacko

some kids are def louder than some, my niece is a quiet wee thing, plays very well, but her brother is LOUD, everything he does is loud, stomps about talking at the top of his voice crashing into things, falling over and breaking things, and honestly i dont think he can help it.

But living under that must be an absolute nightmare, an impossible situation.

He can certainly help talking at the top of his voice. His parents have clearly not taught him its impolite to do this.

[mildredhubble]

Originally Posted by CJM91

it sounds like you live somewhere designed for children, seeing as though there is an attached park

many flats consist of only single and childless couples, in my old flat the girl below had no kids but her friends did,they'd come over and stay sometimes and I never got much sleep, I could hear them crying and everything, the mum telling them off, all that other noise

im sorry but i dont think it is the right environment for kids, its not good for anyone imo, you cant keep an eye on your kids playing outside from a flat

however i accept in london theres probably many flats designed for families, im from the north west and a pretty rural area so its likely different fdown there re flats and kids

We have a child in a flat and have a noisey neighbour with children.

I think it's very wrong for you I suggest that our home life is not ideal for a child because of where we live.

[Vodka_Drinka]

Originally Posted by CJM91

people with kids shouldnt live in flats, children are too noisy and it shows no consideration for childless people (who mostly live in flats)

the ops neighbour should move, maybe the op should discuss it with him

personally i dont feel flats are a good home situation for children, no garden to play in, probably a nightmare even getting them outside, especially if you use a pram (i found it hard enough with my small dog and that was just a first floorer), more risk of injury from falling out of windows and down stairs, just not designed for families at all

i have a single mum on my street with 6 kids 3 under 6 years old and they run havok in the street, theres been complaints from my elderly neighbours of the kids knocking on the door asking for sweets and ice lollies (which ive seen happen), the other day 4 of the kids were rolling around wrapped in duvet covers in the middle of the street, covering themselves in dirt and making loads of noise

parents should take responsibility and not cause nuisance to their neighbours, a child is a tenant like any other and should be subject to the usual noise rules- it wouldnt be acceptable for the adult to make loads of noise

Do you have some kind of statistics to support your claims that childless people "mostly live in flats"? I know just as many childless people who are living in houses, and I know people with children who live in flats. It's not ideal and I'm sure they'd rather be in houses but its not always possible due to financial constraints and/or a shortage of social housing.

Your comment that the OP should tell his neighbour to move is laughable, and I can only imagine the response if he were to do that. I personally don't believe that people who live in flats should have dogs, after all they bark a lot and probably disrupt neighbours far more than a noisy child would do. What would you say if someone told you to move because your dog was barking all the time? Can you now see now ridiculous your comments are?

[Christian_Grey]

Originally Posted by Vodka_Drinka

Do you have some kind of statistics to support your claims that childless people "mostly live in flats"? I know just as many childless people who are living in houses, and I know people with children who live in flats. It's not ideal and I'm sure they'd rather be in houses but its not always possible due to financial constraints and/or a shortage of social housing.

Your comment that the OP should tell his neighbour to move is laughable, and I can only imagine the response if he were to do that. I personally don't believe that people who live on flats should have dogs, after all they bark a lot and probably disrupt neighbours far more than a noisychild would do. What would you say if someone told you to move because your dog was barking all the time? Can you now see now ridiculous your comments are?

Read the thread properly. His comments were in relation to someone telling the OP they should move if they couldn't deal with the noise. Here it is

Originally Posted by Judge Mental

None of us like confrontation but in this life you can't expect other people to fix everything you don't like - sometimes you have to be prepared to help yourself, as difficult as that might be especially if you are anxious.

Flats aren't easy places to raise children - and I'm sure they aren't continuously noisy but clearly you are very sensitive to the noise.

Perhaps you might be better moving somewhere else?

[LH1]

I suffer from anxiety also and I know how much noise levels can make you feel worse. I also understand how difficult it would be to speak to this person in the flat above as you have social anxiety - so do I.

Personally I would go and see your doctor and say that it is making your health worse. I read also that your partner is disabled. I'm assuming then that you spend alot of time in your flat so you have no choice but to listen to this constant noise. I would see if its possible for your doctor to write a letter to your housing association/council. This will add great weight to your complaint.

The other thing you can do as you suffer from a mental health issue is to get yourself a mental health advocate. You can find one online or ask your doctor. They will mediate on your behalf with the neighbour and also speak to your landlord so they take your complaint more seriously. They will do this for free.

Personally I don't think its the childrens fault. Its the parents fault for not teaching the children consideration for other people.

[chrisii2011]

Originally Posted by LH1

I suffer from anxiety also and I know how much noise levels can make you feel worse. I also understand how difficult it would be to speak to this person in the flat above as you have social anxiety - so do I.

Personally I would go and see your doctor and say that it is making your health worse. I read also that your partner is disabled. I'm assuming then that you spend alot of time in your flat so you have no choice but to listen to this constant noise. I would see if its possible for your doctor to write a letter to your housing association/council. This will add great weight to your complaint.

The other thing you can do as you suffer from a mental health issue is to get yourself a mental health advocate. You can find one online or ask your doctor. They will mediate on your behalf with the neighbour and also speak to your landlord so they take your complaint more seriously. They will do this for free.

Personally I don't think its the childrens fault. Its the parents fault for not teaching the children consideration for other people.

Thank you,that sounds like good advice,i never thought of that and your right i don't blame the kids,they're being kids,its their dad whose fault it is for not telling them otherwise that making all the noise is inconsiderate.

[mashamoto79]

I always remember our neighbour moaning to me about my son. He told me to stop him walking around in shoes.

At the time he was 6/7 months and was just crawling around like a baby does. What was I supposed to do, stop a baby from crawling? People can just be very unreasonable.

Fast forward a few years, and he is six and we live in a house. And when he wakes up in the mornings, it is like an earthquake.

[CJM91]

Originally Posted by Vodka_Drinka

Do you have some kind of statistics to support your claims that childless people "mostly live in flats"? I know just as many childless people who are living in houses, and I know people with children who live in flats. It's not ideal and I'm sure they'd rather be in houses but its not always possible due to financial constraints and/or a shortage of social housing.

Your comment that the OP should tell his neighbour to move is laughable, and I can only imagine the response if he were to do that. I personally don't believe that people who live in flats should have dogs, after all they bark a lot and probably disrupt neighbours far more than a noisy child would do. What would you say if someone told you to move because your dog was barking all the time? Can you now see now ridiculous your comments are?

My point was not that most childless people live in flats, but that flats consist mostly of childless people, professionals, singles, childless couples, older divorcees etc

as I said, why do you think in some flat and apartment blocks children strictly arnt allowed (they can visit, but tenants cant have children live there)?

I'm childless and have lived in both flats and houses, in my flat block not one person that lived there had children

I dont believe many kinds of dogs should be in flats, however I have a breed designed for apartment living and doesnt bark, so for me its not an issue. I think people that have big dogs and dogs with lots of energy etc in flats arnt doing well by the dog.

Children are noisier than animals, its not really a battle is it, my comment was given with thought to what is best for kids and neighbours, which is children not living in flat blocks

[JDBaby]

I'm real sorry you are having problems. I've had noise problems with our chavvy neighbours in the past. I've always been very polite, BUT firm in asking that it stop. Despite occasional reoccurrences it seems to work. Of course everybody's circumstances are different, but I work on the basis that these type of people will keep doing this because they don't think anybody will confront them about it and are just ignorant. I realise you are anxious about it, I suffer anxiety myself to some degree, but I'd suggest keep knocking at the door when it happens with a polite request to stop and if you can persuade your neighbour to do the same so much the better. In the meantime write everything down (including lack of help from housing officer), and see how things go with the Enviromental Officer.

[chrisii2011]

UPDATE

Have confronted since i last posted and he said he would keep the noise down. But nope its still going on and today its beautiful and sunny and theyre up there bouncing footbals and thudding. taking this to mediation since he wont stop it. And he doesnt care his kids are making people's lives hell

[Akane Tendo]

Originally Posted by chrisii2011

UPDATE

Have confronted since i last posted and he said he would keep the noise down. But nope its still going on and today its beautiful and sunny and theyre up there bouncing footbals and thudding. taking this to mediation since he wont stop it. And he doesnt care his kids are making people's lives hell

Well if that turkey baster works you'll have one of your own soon. So you can return all that noise to him.

[bowland37]

http://www.theairguncentre.com/

[chrisii2011]

Originally Posted by Akane Tendo

Well if that turkey baster works you'll have one of your own soon. So you can return all that noise to him.

lol i wouldnt stoop to his level

[Throgmorton1]

The sound in old buildings can be remarkably deceptive - it is perfectly possible that your noise doesn't carry to their flat at all - and they assume the same is true for their noise.

Visiting children are relatively easy to deal with - just try and imagine the total ,love of a child seen on alternative weekends.

The constant noise of high volume TVs or stereos can drive you mental - it's easier to deal with the occasional. I have a neighbour with 2 small bys that visit on alternate weekends. I vary between a wry smile at their time with their dad and huge resentment.

I do realise though that this is my problem - not his. I either go for a walk or wear the cheaply available headphones.

I'm sure that constant noise pollution is enough to drive you to distraction - but occasional noise is down to you to deal with. Waste your energy seething or look at the temporary fixes. Old building were not designed to cover the background noise of neighbours - and there are so many available short term solutions.

[VOICEINTHENIGHT]

Originally Posted by chrisii2011

So theres a guy upstairs who has his kids over and all they do constantly is bang a footabll around and i all you hear all evening and day is bang crash wallop.Its been reported to the housing association but they dont care and wont do anything,and weve spoken to him about keeping the noise down but its still going on.

I have to admit thatI haven't read this thread all the way through, I haven't the patience,when you live in a flat you have to acceptsome noise from above/below, especially from children. I have a hard time understanding anyone complaining about children doing what children do. children do generally make a noise playing and so on. It is very hard for children and theie parents today, parents are constantly bombarded with stories that it isn't safe for children to play outside then thay get it in the ear from neighbours who complain about the child/ren making a noise in the flat above/below/next door. neither the parent nor th echild/ren wants to be a neussance but what can they do? perhaps you should use ear phones and listen to some music. Sorry