I used to live in Barnet hoots, and beleive me there is nuffin glorious about it

I`m not referring to the leak centre of the universe...Im speaking of me lovely silken tress wot a gawgeous jawdropping lovely

I think there is a sinkhole [see wot I did there] in Barnet where all the waste fluids go to destroy houses!!

Tress, singular? You have one long silken hair? Not sexy!!!!

It`s all well -gelled

Have you coiled it up and stuck it to your bonce with hair gel?

Nah...I used hormone rooting powder...works just as good and it`s much cheaper


You shake the contents of the box on yer luscious locks comb it through yer jaw-dropping gawgeous tresses and bingo....you has Supa Dupa amazingly luscious locks. See me photos in the lastest issue of Vogue magazine.

I bet you use blood, fish n bone as talcum powder too

Never touch that stuff Twass...blood...eek! Bleugh

Grows sexy vegetables though!

Nah fanks...me stinging neetle stinky stuff does it better....
Pours contents of me stinking stinging nettle bottle over twass barnet...

Heyulp! Hoots is growing taters and cabbages in me Barnet!!!!

Well that`s disposed of her

Declares self ..WINNER

Think again hooter, these are the sexiest veg on the planet!!

Just thought I would pop by to see if anything is happening. There isn't so, I will go away again and polish my crown as King of this thread.

I can see you are mad, Chin. One day you may bet a crown of your own. Meanwhile reflect into mine !

*kicks Martin out of thread* I've stopped gallivanting about for a bit, so gerrof my throne immediately you unsexy old git!!

The throne is mine and will remain mine.

Go back to the gallivanting - if you can find someone that is at all interested in you.

If I ever run out of admirers [not very likely considering my total sexiness] I would gallivant on me own, if I wanted to! However, for now I have returned to claim my crown, so you can jog on

I hear you are a great hit at the 'Home for the Retired and Genteel Folk', so I think you should spend more time there. I will continue to rule this thread.

*screams with laughter* - Genteel? Moi?? I'm sexy, not genteel!!

You can go and rule the Last Person to post is a silly old Fart thread

Blows a raspberry.......

*eats raspberry* ..... nom nom!!

Definitely not at all sexy.

You haven't seen me eating them