|
||||||||
Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4) |
![]() |
| Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
|
|
#3601 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,856
|
"Sickening harbinger of DOOM" You know, no one's forcing you to have a mobile …
Well Liz, clearly you did NOT "get on like a house on fire" with the ex-wife! And you'll be wanting to gracefully decline that cameo of Jesus, you being so very Buddhist … |
|
|
|
|
Please sign in or register to remove this advertisement.
|
|
|
#3602 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: London
Posts: 65,903
|
Quote:
I somehow missed this:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...le-ground.html As for Shona Sibary, her vileness gives Liz a run for her money. I wish Shona wasn't so unfortunate looking, I'd feel more comfortable mocking her. Ha ha. She is ludicrously horrible, even if she looked like a goddess.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3603 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 505
|
Quote:
This week's Dreary is the usual blather (remember the cliff-hanger ending from last week ? Seems she didn't.), and this farticle -
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/ar...g-offline.html - is much the same, but salted within is an interesting paragraph (assuming she's not lying as per - third from last). Oh, and Liz, all mobile phones have this handy feature that hardly anyone uses: it's called an "off switch". "Today, though, having just had the worst week of my life, with a digital death threat, with terrible, terrible news reaching me by email that meant I was about to lose everything I’ve worked for over 32 years, and also a deafening digital silence from someone that meant our relationship was over, I yearn for a few moments’ respite from the internet, which is why I've already requested a press trip to the luxury hotel in Germany that has a kill switch for guests." Hmm. HMMM. IF it weren't for the fact that her relationship with the Baker were entirely conducted via text I'd say it's Nic. In fact I will still put my digital nonexistent money on it being Nic, though we're supposed to infer that it's the Baker. EIther that or it's a passive aggressive go at the Baker for not replying to a text. ETA I bet it's someone we've never heard of. Oh no but what if it is SUE NEEDLEMAN? |
|
|
|
|
|
#3604 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: London
Posts: 65,903
|
Quote:
This week's Dreary is the usual blather (remember the cliff-hanger ending from last week ? Seems she didn't.), and this farticle -
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/ar...g-offline.html ". And how awful that she was given instructions in Italian.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3605 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 147
|
Contenders?
So, we have the Baker, Nic and Sue Needleman but there's someone we've missed.
How about the Editor in Chief of the Mail? |
|
|
|
|
|
#3606 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 172
|
What about her friend Dawn? Or Isobel, the one she did her cow pension company thing with?
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3607 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,856
|
Quote:
What about her friend Dawn? Or Isobel, the one she did her cow pension company thing with?
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3608 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Islington, London
Posts: 460
|
Quote:
Good call, didn't a recent Dreary include details of something that Isobel had specifically requested NOT be repeated to her staff?
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3609 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 4,792
|
Quote:
What about her friend Dawn? Or Isobel, the one she did her cow pension company thing with?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/...y-lean-on.html Scroll down to the seventh comment..... |
|
|
|
|
|
#3610 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 32
|
I'm pretty sure it's Isobel.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3611 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,856
|
And after Liz wrote about the Joanna Yeates murder with such tact and care, who better to send out to Greece at this sensitive time ... http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ES-Athens.html
"Can this be right? Maybe I panicked last night. I can still order a quinoa salad from room service, after all." So that's all right then |
|
|
|
|
|
#3612 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 505
|
And why the pointless dig at Dominodarling?
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3613 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 4,566
|
Wow, this week's diary takes self indulgent rambling to a whole new level! I'll say this for her, she certainly knows how to milk a situation for maximum wordcount-filling. Just lately, almost every sentence is a rehash of a previously recounted story, usually some argument she's had with someone she offended in an earlier column. Which gives her the opportunity to fill half the column by repeating the original comments, followed by the offended person's reaction, followed by the traditional rewriting of history ('I only said......'). It's almost exactly the same pattern every week! Quote:
Yes, wasn't that the Dreary, or some other MoS drivel, when she said her 'friend's' new café was haunted or somesuch, and her friend wanted this kept quiet ...! Am sure others can give links - I can't be bothered right now, other stuff on my mind(gastroscopy tomorrow oh joy!!!) Hope they're generous with a bit of sedation!
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3614 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Islington, London
Posts: 460
|
Quote:
Wow, this week's diary takes self indulgent rambling to a whole new level! I'll say this for her, she certainly knows how to milk a situation for maximum wordcount-filling. Just lately, almost every sentence is a rehash of a previously recounted story, usually some argument she's had with someone she offended in an earlier column. Which gives her the opportunity to fill half the column by repeating the original comments, followed by the offended person's reaction, followed by the traditional rewriting of history ('I only said......'). It's almost exactly the same pattern every week!
How did your gastroscopy go, amikolaichek? Hope it wasn't too bad and they gave you plenty of sedation. Still, a gastroscopy is a walk in the park compared with a colonoscopy! Yup, had one of those recently. Still, as I told myself while what felt like 7000 metres of fibre optics connected to an Olympus camera were delving around in my guts, 'mustn't complain - plenty far worse off than I, like poor Lizard ... all those Brazilian waxes for the delectation of The Baker, god, how that woman suffers'. (Oh hell! Sudden horrible thought - should I have had a Brazilian before the colonoscopy ... Oh no no, silly me, of course not - I was facing the other way during the proceedings ... )
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3615 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 31
|
If the shoes are mine then put them in the bin. You aren't 'allowed' to see me so I can't help. I seriously hope all this is worth it David. I was a good friend to you and you pushed me aside for someone that prints such terrible stuff about you and your family and your so called dirty habits. So sad.
The actual text from the scummy moo to David, which was in response to her having a go at him for having a wicker basket of shoes in his lounge. I realised that they were probably mine so sent the text. Knew it would wind her up if she got to read it though. She changes punctuation, takes things out, changes word placements .... And she still harps on about only writing the truth. You have to go through a wardrobe to get to her imaginary world ! Do I get a share of the fee do you think for having my text printed? And is it ok to call someone a scummy moo in print? What is she - 12! |
|
|
|
|
|
#3616 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 580
|
Quote:
If the shoes are mine then put them in the bin. You aren't 'allowed' to see me so I can't help. I seriously hope all this is worth it David. I was a good friend to you and you pushed me aside for someone that prints such terrible stuff about you and your family and your so called dirty habits. So sad.
The actual text from the scummy moo to David, which was in response to her having a go at him for having a wicker basket of shoes in his lounge. I realised that they were probably mine so sent the text. Knew it would wind her up if she got to read it though. She changes punctuation, takes things out, changes word placements .... And she still harps on about only writing the truth. You have to go through a wardrobe to get to her imaginary world ! Do I get a share of the fee do you think for having my text printed? And is it ok to call someone a scummy moo in print? What is she - 12! It's a poor show that David hasn't had "a word" and asked that you are left alone. You never asked for this. |
|
|
|
|
|
#3617 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 83
|
Quote:
If the shoes are mine then put them in the bin. You aren't 'allowed' to see me so I can't help. I seriously hope all this is worth it David. I was a good friend to you and you pushed me aside for someone that prints such terrible stuff about you and your family and your so called dirty habits. So sad.
The actual text from the scummy moo to David, which was in response to her having a go at him for having a wicker basket of shoes in his lounge. I realised that they were probably mine so sent the text. Knew it would wind her up if she got to read it though. She changes punctuation, takes things out, changes word placements .... And she still harps on about only writing the truth. You have to go through a wardrobe to get to her imaginary world ! Do I get a share of the fee do you think for having my text printed? And is it ok to call someone a scummy moo in print? What is she - 12! |
|
|
|
|
|
#3618 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 31
|
The MoS don't respond.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3619 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 580
|
Quote:
The MoS don't respond.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3620 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,856
|
Ah, "X" of the charity ball is the relationship she's lost. Looks like it is Isobel, then ... Quote:
And is it ok to call someone a scummy moo in print? What is she - 12!
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3621 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 19
|
Quote:
(Oh hell! Sudden horrible thought - should I have had a Brazilian before the colonoscopy ... Oh no no, silly me, of course not - I was facing the other way during the proceedings ... ) |
|
|
|
|
|
#3622 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 503
|
If she's paying £20,000 an acre for grazing land, then someone's having a laugh at her expense - that's probably more than twice the going rate for the area she's in. Still, when you're (allegedly) on the brink of bankruptcy, what's another hundred grand or so between friends? (That's assuming five acres or so that she'd be needing for her and Nic's equine collection.)
No wonder she's edgy...
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3623 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 31
|
I posted the text on the comments section but no comments on DM
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3624 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Islington, London
Posts: 460
|
Quote:
I believe the Brasilian includes the rear view. And I am sure any Liz-worthy person would have splurged on the anal bleaching beforehand, also.
Mind you, the fibre optic gizmo having 'passed the portals', however un-groomed I now realise they must have appeared, the rest of my innards were apparently a thing of beauty, thanks to the gallons of what I can only describe as 'liquid Brillo' one drinks for 36 or so hours before the procedure. The kind and chatty operatives (two lady consultants and a lady chief registrar, plus three nurses) certainly didn't complain about any hirsuteness of the Amikolaichek backside, nor its lack of a good preparatory soaking in Domestos. In fact, the session was quite like a jolly, gossipy get-together, with wine, and despite my sedated condition, I was able to take part - bit like a party with some fun girlfriends. I am sure if the Lizard ever has to undergo such an examination, she will be perfectly prepared in every way - depilated, bleached, her nether regions previously soaked in Bliss Softening Knickers etc. etc. NOT that I'm wishing any such procedure on her. Of course not. Never! But if, God forbid, she needs it, then she should INSIST on NO SEDATION WHATSOEVER, as I believe the sedative drugs ARE NOT VEGAN! |
|
|
|
|
|
#3625 |
|
Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 116
|
Am I alone in wondering what the DM are doing in sending the Lizard to Greece ?
![]() Then again, and upon reflection... may be she's the ideal UK-citizen to discuss subjects such as debt, tax-avoidance, pain and suffering, with those Greeks who own Louboutins and are in search of a local pawn-shop. ![]() And let us not forget that Lizard is a Buddhist whose mind is full of mindfulness with no overt attachments to material possessions. ![]() Plus... the Greeks must have tons of Garnier Fructis on credit...
|
|
|
|
![]() |
|
All times are GMT. The time now is 11:37.




Ha ha. She is ludicrously horrible, even if she looked like a goddess.
And how awful that she was given instructions in Italian.

