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Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4)


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Old 04-12-2015, 21:30
House of Jones
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Oh dear. I wonder if she has any idea what the living expenses are that she'll be allowed on an IVA. Clue: I expect the staff will have to go, for a start.
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Old 04-12-2015, 21:47
alaninmcr
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Well well well. Just look at this.

https://www.insolvencydirect.bis.gov...127&CaseType=I

Wonder if the Convertible Mercedes has had to go back.....
It does fit in with her rant where she moans:

I’ve just been told that I have to get a cheaper car.

And that I can’t have a cleaner or a gardener or an agent or a London office; that I have to cancel my life and health insurance; that I have to dye my hair at home and stop shopping at Space NK; that I didn’t really need to replace those bed sheets the cats clawed holes in; that I can only spend £50 a month on my pets; and, oh, that I have to sell my home and rent somewhere cheaper.
It's quite surprising that her column does reflect reality - although through a fairground mirror.
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Old 05-12-2015, 08:34
newbaby
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It does fit in with her rant where she moans:



It's quite surprising that her column does reflect reality - although through a fairground mirror.
I did wonder if the wonderful new accountant in Bristol, mentioned a while back, was rather more than just an accountant...
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Old 05-12-2015, 08:36
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She clearly has no idea how money works.

Dear God just THINK how she will milk this.
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Old 05-12-2015, 09:35
Bellagio
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I seem to recall she implied that her new "accountant" had discovered the tax debt was all a misunderstanding. Looks like the misunderstanding was on her part. I note there's no occupation listed - well, she doesn't actually DO anything, does she ?

Tracking this is going to be so very... agreeable.
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Old 05-12-2015, 11:46
newbaby
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I seem to recall she implied that her new "accountant" had discovered the tax debt was all a misunderstanding. Looks like the misunderstanding was on her part. I note there's no occupation listed - well, she doesn't actually DO anything, does she ?

Tracking this is going to be so very... agreeable.
If the "accountant" (did seem odd to go to someone in Bristol when you live in Yorkshire) uncovered the fact that an over estimate of income had been used to calculate (under self assessment) tax due, then an appeal is made. Not exactly rocket science. And happens a lot.

I suspect the financial situation in which she's found herself goes way deeper than HMRC and the fact that her income dropped like a stone (although still not exactly to a state of penury by most peoples standards) and this was overlooked - either through her non-disclosure/thinking it mattered not a jot to the previous accountant or because the previous accountant didn't cut the mustard.

Selling the house will be an interesting marketing exercise, in view of a) the court case involving the next door neighbour which she emblazoned all over the MonS and b) apparently, no kitchen in the main house.

Just hope she has the gumption not to whine, grizzle and moan that none of what has befallen is her fault and she's a victim of nasty people who have lost patience about being paid what is due. A bit of humility would be a start.

I am not holding my breath.
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Old 05-12-2015, 13:26
Rubbish Name
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So is this the same as bankruptcy, or a step towards it, or a way of trying to avoid it? Having always lived within my means I'm happy to say I don't know anything about IVAs. Is it what Kerry Katona did?

I'll be amused if she has to start shopping in Primark with the hoi-polloi! She might even have to invest in some knickers that don't need dry-cleaning. Poor heeer, shall we have a whip-round? You might have to wait while I finish laughing
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Old 05-12-2015, 17:25
sunstone
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All that money spent on fanny waxings will have to stop.She might even have to use a common shampoo like Garnier Fructis!
The kitchen was being moved into the cellar I think,not sure it ever got finished though.She first claimed to have had underfloor heating installed in the cellar for the dogs, ( presumably under the stone flags then,so that would be efficient ) then daft Dave was doing a bit of painting down there.
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Old 05-12-2015, 21:10
missymorgan
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So is this the same as bankruptcy, or a step towards it, or a way of trying to avoid it? Having always lived within my means I'm happy to say I don't know anything about IVAs. Is it what Kerry Katona did?

I'll be amused if she has to start shopping in Primark with the hoi-polloi! She might even have to invest in some knickers that don't need dry-cleaning. Poor heeer, shall we have a whip-round? You might have to wait while I finish laughing
It's a cheaper alternative to bankruptcy, usually used by those on low incomes and without assets as far as I'm aware. You pay into it for 5 years and your creditors get a 'dividend' after the administration fees are taken out by the IVA supervisor. After 5 years your debt get written off. You can't apply for credit over £500 during the 5 years and have to declared any additional income.
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Old 05-12-2015, 22:36
Mrs BBV
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Oh well there's always reality TV as an option for her, oh wait........

Best she get an epilator. That was one of the first things I had to resort to when I lost my job. No more monthly waxing at the day spa......two paracetamol and then 30 mins of hell doing everywhere but my bikini line and then 10 mins of sheer hell attempting that. Savings in Inner London circa £100 per month. And tweezers and an eyebrow pencil instead of an eyebrow shape & tint, that will save another £75 a month at London Celebrity eyebrow stylist Vashilay Patel's Eyebrow Clinic or £150 for a home visit.

I bet John Frieda / L'Oreal do a home dye in 'Midnight Storm' so she'll save a small fortune on colouring, learn new skills and be self sufficient in no time and save another £300 a month. Then she will be able to write more articles on how 'character building' bankruptcy is.

Meanwhile I've shown her how to cut her costs by £500 a month by making three small changes to her essential grooming budget.
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Old 06-12-2015, 08:28
seawitch
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Her latest bile is directed towards people with children (surprise, surprise). She has a go at people who produce Christmas cards with photos of the family on them. I accept that is a bit of an ego trip but I enjoy round robins with family photos and seeing how people's children have grown. Liz also has a go at people who get their children to sign Christmas cards. What a mean spirited woman she is. I'm surprised anyone bothers to send her a card.
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Old 06-12-2015, 09:00
pixieboots
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I bet John Frieda / L'Oreal do a home dye in 'Midnight Storm' so she'll save a small fortune on colouring, learn new skills and be self sufficient in no time and save another £300 a month.
Midnight storm
I've always been stunned (disbelieving) that a woman who spends such a fortune on grooming has had such a succession of really terrible colourists, honestly her hair looks like it belongs to tatoo'd June from the bikers club who's stuck in a 70's style rut. There's no way someone who visits the salon regularly for colour ends up looking like that-she's been tinting it herself for years imo, you can see the build up on the ends.

Even my local old ladies hairdressers who do a colour for thirty quid wouldnt leave your hair looking like that. didnt she do a farticle about dying her roots every week?
How do we actually know she's spent the money on grooming she says she has- like everything else it could be a massive lie-her hair seems to indicate she's been diy-ing with a box from poundland.
.

Also what woman in her 50's needs all that waxing?one of the joys of aging imo is less and less body hair. she's been ripping it out by the roots for years so am surprised there's anything left to need waxing.

Obviously the facial waxing is another story- costs there tend to rise with age
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Old 06-12-2015, 09:18
KeepBooks
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I'm sure I have read this mornings column regarding the lost dog and its rescue before. I remember commenting in the MoS the need for Liz to send a substantial donation to the rescue services. Unless it was another dog in the same situation. I can't remember how many she has.
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Old 06-12-2015, 09:55
puffin1962
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I'm sure I have read this mornings column regarding the lost dog and its rescue before. I remember commenting in the MoS the need for Liz to send a substantial donation to the rescue services. Unless it was another dog in the same situation. I can't remember how many she has.
Yeah - she wrote about it on November 8th in a PS


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/ar...uffin-top.html
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Old 06-12-2015, 10:08
newbaby
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I'm sure I have read this mornings column regarding the lost dog and its rescue before. I remember commenting in the MoS the need for Liz to send a substantial donation to the rescue services. Unless it was another dog in the same situation. I can't remember how many she has.
Same dog. It was mentioned quite recently in the LJ "column" in the main bit of the MoS, which I think someone mentioned on here. It does seem very odd that an entire mountain rescue team is deployed. But perhaps it was looked upon as a training exercise.

I hope a massive donation was made as the rescue services are made up of volunteers who give their time to help in emergencies (a lost dog is a personal emergency, however it's not necessarily the function for which the rescue services were created). However, in the light of the current financial straits into LJ has sailed, single-handed, I'm not sure she's has the wherewithal to distribute funds to something important while fussing about the lack of money to pay for fripperies.

Last edited by newbaby : 06-12-2015 at 10:12. Reason: a rather splendid typo
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Old 06-12-2015, 10:10
newbaby
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Puffin, you beat me to the post...literally!
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Old 06-12-2015, 11:01
Bellagio
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Oh well there's always reality TV as an option for her, oh wait........

Best she get an epilator. That was one of the first things I had to resort to when I lost my job. No more monthly waxing at the day spa......two paracetamol and then 30 mins of hell doing everywhere but my bikini line and then 10 mins of sheer hell attempting that. Savings in Inner London circa £100 per month. And tweezers and an eyebrow pencil instead of an eyebrow shape & tint, that will save another £75 a month at London Celebrity eyebrow stylist Vashilay Patel's Eyebrow Clinic or £150 for a home visit.

I bet John Frieda / L'Oreal do a home dye in 'Midnight Storm' so she'll save a small fortune on colouring, learn new skills and be self sufficient in no time and save another £300 a month. Then she will be able to write more articles on how 'character building' bankruptcy is.

Meanwhile I've shown her how to cut her costs by £500 a month by making three small changes to her essential grooming budget.
Her eyebrows, being semi-permanently tattooed on, wouldn't be even that expensive.
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Old 06-12-2015, 11:01
Suzy_Cat
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Midnight storm
I've always been stunned (disbelieving) that a woman who spends such a fortune on grooming has had such a succession of really terrible colourists, honestly her hair looks like it belongs to tatoo'd June from the bikers club who's stuck in a 70's style rut. There's no way someone who visits the salon regularly for colour ends up looking like that-she's been tinting it herself for years imo, you can see the build up on the ends.

Even my local old ladies hairdressers who do a colour for thirty quid wouldnt leave your hair looking like that. didnt she do a farticle about dying her roots every week?
How do we actually know she's spent the money on grooming she says she has- like everything else it could be a massive lie-her hair seems to indicate she's been diy-ing with a box from poundland.
.

Also what woman in her 50's needs all that waxing?one of the joys of aging imo is less and less body hair. she's been ripping it out by the roots for years so am surprised there's anything left to need waxing.

Obviously the facial waxing is another story- costs there tend to rise with age
I agree, her hair does not look as if it's been in the hands of a costly colourist, or even an average one. There's nothing WRONG with having block colour darkest brown hair but it certainly doesn't look as if she's spent any more on it than I used to when mine was L'Oreal Brasilia.

I presume all the waxing is a) OCD and b) beard. Now, I can understand a woman wanting to budget for a beard wax. But you don't have to spend that much on it. A cheap cheap cheap place will do it JUST as well as a pricey one and it's hard to screw up unless you burn the client's face with the wax. I use a place my beauty therapist friends frown on because it's practically slave labour, and I do feel bad about it, but quite honestly the worst job I get there is as good as I've had in places I've paid three times as much for. Go anywhere that has Middle Eastern or Indian ladies taking care of your facial hair and you're sweet. It will be gone gone gone.

Eyebrows are another matter and CAN be screwed up, so I agree with Mrs BBV that tweezers and a pencil are her best bet. I get mine waxed, at the same cheapass place, and I am very specific about shape and it's always fine.

Liz could have a whole new lease of writing life exploring the joys of cheap self-cares. But I fear she won't be able to withstand the urge to overdramatise and make it endlessly negative.

ETA oh wait her brows are tattooed on? Well that saves a few pence.
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Old 06-12-2015, 14:01
Mrs BBV
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Semi permanent tattooing needs maintenance and top up. Plus redoing every 24 months. Much cheaper to get a pencil and tweezers for the stray hairs.

Last month I read an article about a facial scraper, a sort of gentle razor with a guard for face fuzz and exfoliating. Costs about 75p on eBay. There you go Liz, just saved you having to buy an exfoliator now too.

I divide beauty treatments into two.....beauty experiences and beauty maintenance. Maintenance is done in a tiny cubicle above my hairdresser and costs 1/3 of the same treatments in a spa / salon. As you say you can't really screw up unless you pay for a pricey manicure where they trim your cuticles without asking first eh Liz?

Sali Hughes, genius beauty journalist at The Guardian, did an article this year about 50 budget beauty buys that are better then their pricey counterparts. She ought to read it.
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Old 06-12-2015, 16:43
amikolaichek
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Oh dear, oh dear, that's quite spoiled my day. An IVA - for LIZ! - doesn't bear thinking about. Poor Liz. I want, I really want to do my 'bit' to help, so just today, despite my bad back, I staggered off to Superdrug and bought a bag of disposable razors - load of them for a few quid. Will post them off to Richmond (second class) so that should take care of the, er. 'fanny' area. (But beware of a sort of 'down there' shaving rash - I speak from experience - and be really REALLY careful wielding the razor in several particularly 'sensitive' areas). And maybe best not to use them for eyebrow shaping, Black shoe polish can do quite a good job for that, though will come off easily, such as 'snogging' situations. As for eyelash colouring, no suggestions, sorry. Don't try shoe polish.

I know a bit about IVAs. A close friend had to opt for one, after her business partner (the business was doing really well and growing) decamped in a hurry to foreign parts taking ALL the cash with her. My friend was left swinging in the wind, through no fault of her own. An IVA is a slightly less worse option than bankruptcy. See
https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/de...-arrangements/

But Liz will REALLY have to draw her horns in re all the expensive habits she has. The Insolvency Practitioner is legally bound to keep a beady eye on all the in-goings and out-goings by the person involved, because the creditors would be mightily pissed off if the IP didn't! In short, an IVA is no walk in the park, and if Liz continues bragging in her 'Drearies' about pricey beauty treatments, high end clothes, gold Dunhill lighters and feeding her menagerie from M & S ... well, let's just say, it won't go down too well. And yes, she may have to sell her house and move down - perhaps to The Baker's Brixton palace? Still, if they really really adore each other, that'll be all lovely and romantic and fine .... (pauses to stop choking on a gulp of Aldi gin and tonic).

Can't help wondering which creditor finally pulled the rug out and had had enough ... some of the hacked off trades people in her last place near Exmoor to whom she may have owed money? HMRC? Probably the latter - they NEVER mess around.

Seriously, I am wondering about her menagerie of animals. Can't recall how many dogs now ... there's Toothless Deaf Hilda, recently rescued by Mountain Rescue (we've been told twice about that now), or Michael/Sam the Sheep and Cat Eating Dog. And isn't there some Mini- whatsit that eats eight thousand quid pink sofas? (and, as Liz in her Dreary last Sunday reminded The Baker - he still owes for the replacement material to cover the damage ...)

Have I missed any canines? And let's not forget the horses - after the death (RIP) of poor Lizzie, I seem to recall there's a couple of others and surely, unless I'm going completely gaga, there was a Dreary about buying a field for the gee-gees (Lizzy's and Nic's) to gambol around in. Costing thousands, naturally. If I've got that wrong, apologies.

But the cats ... as an ex Crazy Cat Lady myself (my cat, alas, PTS back in May and I'm far too ancient to take on another, in case it outlives me) I am worried about the cats. Liz has, in the past, claimed to own seventeen pussies, and that doesn't include the one that actually belongs to The Baker's ex girlfriend. I actually really hope she is telling porkies about this - SEVENTEEN CATS plus one?

If, God forbid, Liz has to sell up and move in with The Baker in his Brixton flat, I can't see it accommodating eighteen cats. And the three (?) dogs? And the horses in his back yard with all the rubbish that he hasn't cleared up yet to Liz's satisfaction?

Never mind - let's all be positive and encouraging in this wonderfully festive season of goodwill etc. etc. Liz and The Baker and the eighteen cats, three or so dogs, the horses, all LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER in Brixton. Because that's TRUE LOVE, that is. After all, it's been a (one sided) GREAT LOVE STORY
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Old 06-12-2015, 18:15
Jennifer_Jones2
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Will they have to fit Nic and her horses into the Brixton flat as well, do you think?

If you google her and money, she's had bad problems for years and teetered on the edge of bankruptcy for ages. I remember one article where she listed her main debts, 2 banks plus at least 4 credit cards plus vast mortgage and a large loan on top!

I know we laugh and a part of it is funny, but it's also tragic if a grown woman nearing 60 hasn't had the sense to see that she is nearing the end of her earning life and sorted herself out. I can only think the Mail finds it amusing, or why haven't they stepped in to help?
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Old 06-12-2015, 18:26
Rubbish Name
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Under the terms of the IVA, will she be allowed to keep her £1.1m four-bed house while she continues to owe so much money?
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Old 06-12-2015, 18:35
alaninmcr
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I can only think the Mail finds it amusing, or why haven't they stepped in to help?
Having annoyed (almost?) all of her fashion contacts, the Mail still keep her on as a columnist. They put up with her awful diary when they have better click-baiters such as Katy Hopkins on their books. So, I think the Mail have been treating her very well.
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Old 06-12-2015, 20:47
Squatch
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She can save money by doing sugaring at home instead of waxing. You only need sugar, hot water (there are recipes online with essential oils and stuff too) and rags to pull it off.
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Old 06-12-2015, 20:49
kamino
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Hi, I am a new poster but avid reader of this thread. I signed up to post this point.

If you look at the Swaledale mountain rescue website you can see a list of callouts they have attended. The only mention of searching for or rescuing a dog is a rescue attempt of a gamekeepers terrier stuck in a rabbit hole. Which was in 2014!!!!

So either she has made this whole incident up, or Swaledale mountain rescue members have given up their own free time and equipment to search for the Dog unofficially, and without a single word of thanks.

And did anyone else notice the thinly veiled swipe ( at I am assuming is the neighbour) of how Hilda actually got to the other side of the river?I am expecting next week that she "KNOWS" it was him getting back at her for writing an article about him.
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