Is it just me, or was yesterday a real pig of a day ??
Today feels so much brighter

I really hope the Former Baker Now Veg Box Delivered - is he going to be known now as FBNVBD ? Nah, bit of a mouthful, don't get excited now Dave
Really glad that he appears to be moving on with his life. Unless Lizbott harpoons him back on board.and yes the 'works for a friend of mine' does sound dangerous.

When are you going to learn Liz hmmm ?????
You can't be a manipulative 12 year old all your life. People have feelings that are more important than you earning squillions.

Don't think she's gona change ever.

That's the ticket

Well, just cheering myself up after hip diagnosis by doing what Liz would do - SPEND SPEND SPEND. So just gone online and ordered for myself ... a raised bog seat! For those unfamiliar with orthopaedic procedures, when you've had a hip replaced, for first month or so one can't - well - get up from normal standard loo ... so one needs to do what one needs to do from the dizzy heights. So to speak. And then you can rise again without too much trouble. (Did I tell you I got stuck in my bath for half an hour on Monday night?)

Yup, gone mad with PayPal, spent a staggering £12.45 on a 'Savanah Raised Toilet Seat'. Going to celebrate my wild extravagance with an extra codeine.

See, Liz is obviously corrupting me into following her spendthrift ways ...

I love the idea of crapping from a lofty height. Do you have any You magazines you can put down first?

Bog seat only raises one's backside about four inches... there is a six inch one, but heights make me dizzy.

As for YOU magazines, pages too scratchy for tender bodily parts - but do make great liners for cat litter trays. Alas, I am now without a pussy - PTS last May [sobbing into my coffee]. But at least I 'let her go' at the right time, when I realised she would suffer if I insisted on keeping her alive to the bitter (and in her case, agonising) end. Unlike some I could mention, who keep terminally sick and suffering animals going on and on just because they 'can't bear to lose them'.

I can't imagine who you mean.

My great vet, who COMPLETELY concurred with my wish that my lovely puss be PTS, there and then, when the tumour first manifested itself but was, alas, so virulent and fast growing, poor puss would have a month or so of awful suffering before inevitable death. Vet told me heart-breaking stories of other animals, suffering horribly because owners refused to 'let them go'. Vet said she wished others had the same attitude as I to PUTTING THE ANIMAL FIRST. If you think about it, it's probably the most loving (though heart-breaking) final thing you can do for an adored animal.

Oh well - let's all cheer up.

Indeed. At least we aren't bankrupt. Although I do crave a tiny Venereal Botoxia bag.

Oh bless you, it's the most unselfish act. Have been through it so many times now. With one of my pot bellied pigs who grew to be as large as the sofa upon which he slept, when it was his time to go I had to knock him out first because lovely vet was nervous about putting him to sleep easily. So he gave me a jar of valium to feed him first. So I put the many crushed pills into honey sandwiches for him. It was the most breathtakingly thing have ever done. But when you love an animal for themselves rather in that : child with a dolly grasping selfish way, you do what ever makes their time at the end easier on them. This subject drives me nuts when people in my life make decisions that make the hair stand up on your neck. You feel like hating them for being that way. I guess we all love in different ways, some look at the object of their affection in a : I love you so you must please me. While others are the polar opposite way : I love you so want to make you happy.

Anyway, glad you've got some equipment on the way to make the necessities easier. You've got to be comfortable !

BellaFiga, search no further ... here are the bags -clutch, crotch, crutch, cr*p - ALL that your covetous little heart could desire ...

A mere snip at £thousand or so plus ...

http://www.bottegaveneta.com/ca/wome.../bags/clutches

Must be a doddle, being subject to an IVA or bankruptcy or somesuch ...

Flipping ada. You couldn't get your bus pass in that.

I don't pay 1% of that for a spectacles case.

Bloody hell, I LOVE handbags, own loads, though Lizbot would turn her nose up at them as they are from Primark or market stalls!

Where do you fit the essentials for a evening out in those clutch bags? The essentials being my mobile, cigarettes, lipstick and house keys!

No expert, but would just hold a credit card if you're lucky. Mad crazy status symbol symbol. That's all it is. Designed for the mad crazy rich ones with more loot then sense. Always think style has to be functional but for these idiots, the more unusable the better it seems to me. Nuts
It's a bit like the clothes favoured by Lizbott, sort of stupid, uncleanable and uncomfortable - am reliably informed.

Some of the shoes on that site are quite nice but bloody ridiculous prices. Which, I should say, is a normal reaction. Not "Oh I should be able to HAVE these. The magazines gave me EXPECTATIONS."

Fight the urge !!!

Women have a whole industry dedicated to informing them they are just not up to scratch, it's so not good for anyone. Don't buy into it all, just save yourself from all the doubt and expense. These people who write this guff, they're just a load of Lizbotts only happy when they're dictating rules to other women, making themselves feel superior. LADIES FOR YOUR OWN SANITY PLEEEEASE PUT DOWN THE MAGS, THE NEWSPAPER, THE DIET BOOK AND JUST BE WHO YOU ARE

I think most of us do not buy into it.

Nobody wants to say this in our society, brain washed as we are, but there as nothing as comforting, warm and safe as a large voluptuous body. This is a fact and nobody has the guts to say it publicly. Don't knock it until you've tried it. I really feel for people who hate their bodies cos they are trying to achieve what they just can't. Those who make whole careers out of putting down the ordinary woman need to be judged and found wanting by their own ridiculous standards. Cos they make others feel so bad about themselves.

All my life I was rake like through being unwell, then a drug I had to take messed up my metabolism and I became obese with in months which was quite hard to make any sense of. But do you know what, being big makes you feel more grounded, steady in yourself, definitely warmer and your body is such a comfort to others. It took me a while to get my head around it but genuinely do feel that way now. So man or woman, don't let these influential people make you feel bad about yourself and hateful towards your body, you can be fat and fit and supple just like you can be thin and stiff and unfit. Just be glad when you have a body that works ok and enjoy life.

This was a special message for Lizbott. Hi liz

This is absolutely true. I don't always like my body - in my head I'm still much slimmer. But being bigger and more substantial does have its benefits. I like taking up space in the world. When I inhale my chest is enormous and I feel powerful. I like having boobs and hips. I give great hugs, so I'm told. I'd still like to lose a bit, but I'm ok with what I've got.

Really great all that positivity you have there. It's so nice to feel cuddly.

The thing is there's room for every shape and size isn't there, but it's rammed down all our throats that you have to fall into this narrow band of acceptability. Then that makes people insecure and peed off all the time so naturally thin women end up feeling under attack because they can't help being thin and people are really up front rude about it ! I've heard so many people say awful things to thin women, opinions they'd never go up and say to a bigger woman. Inevitably that's envy rearing it's head. The label skinny b#tch gets thrown around a lot.

That's awesome.

Poor Liz, I know times are hard for her right now, with the bankruptcy or IVA (there IS a difference, by the way) – but thundering into my email inbox t’other day came an advertisement suggesting that I might ‘Claim your FREE sample of Gourmet’s NEW Cat Soup!’


Let’s be honest about economic realities - who knows where this will all end? The Chinese and other foreign powers are buying up huge chunks of Britain – our industries and houses - and … well … what next? Chinese cuisine taken well beyond what we’re so used to? Yes, we ALL love the friendly local Chinese, and Indian caff and also picking up Chinese/Indian/Thai ‘ready meals’ in M & S, Waitrose, Tesco’s etc,

But – CAT SOUP? Is this what’s to come? Stewed cats? REAL ‘hot-dogs’? BBQd Border Collies? Spatchcocked Spaniels? Tabbies en Croute? Sautéed Siamese? Baked Bengals? Casseroled Bulldogs? And what sort of cat would be the best ingredient for ‘Cat Soup’? Black cats more ‘flavourable-ish’, or maybe a tortie is more of a soupish delicacy? A Persian pussy obviously a most up-market soup - possibly at a premium price?

Please, please tell me that Liz’s seventeen cats plus Prudence are all well and running around in Yorkshire… and that Liz hasn’t, God forbid, been sorely tempted by the Chinese Yuan, in order that she might afford more Bottom Venera Crotch bags etc., and also ward off the IVA Insolvency Practitioner… and the seventeen pussies plus Prudence are not being – well, ‘passed on’ to some foreign conglomerate now taking over another beloved pet food manufacturer - and – oh, I can hardly write this – ending up stewed with soya sauce, some spring onions and a couple of Star Anise …?

I sent an admonitory email to Purina, makers of ‘Gourmet’, referring to what struck me as the ‘unfortunate’ wording of their email and got some anodyne reply saying that ‘We were very sorry to hear of your dislike of the range, but you might prefer our Felix Goody Bags or Felix Crispies instead’.

‘Felix Crispies’? I once, against my better judgement, but to ‘save face’, had to eat fried chickens’ feet in Hong Kong. I am SO tempted to ask Purina to elaborate on what part of cats the ‘Crispies’ are made from … but better not push my luck.

I do notice that the ‘Cat Soup’ reference seems to have disappeared, so good for Purina. I’m sure they meant well … just very ‘unfortunate’ wording. Sorry, Purina, I just couldn’t resist having a bit of fun with you.

Purina are quite good at Customer Relations, but lousy at comprehensible English.
I have a bunch of 50p off per box vouchers from them but who goes around carrying loads of boxes of heavy cat food when they can be ordered on line and delivered? They have replied and are looking into it though!

Madam seems very sorry for herself in both articles today. Not surprising and I think I would be in the same in her situation. We seem to be back to the wretched boiler though and I thought we already knew about that? Nic seems to have reappeared and her boiler has gone as well. I am beginning to wonder if my mind is going?

Mind you, I wouldn't be surprised if it was as I am sitting here surrounded by "aroma de Tom Cat", which is very strong. My neighbour and I finally caught his runaway cat who has been making use of his time to get across every cat he could and also to build a most impressive set of rippling muscles. I think he's realised what has happened to him as he is sitting there, howling sadly.

Sleep well, all.

Today's moan fest - Soz and all that but no sympathy at all

If you can't get a mortgage upon selling farm house, do you :
a) Rent a massive manor house more than 100 miles from work place as a single person
b) Rent small a bungalow next to horse facilities, until you can afford to buy something suitable.

It's a no brainer obviously !
But oh no, Miss Show Off has to be greedy as usual, then sit there sobbing with self pity. IT'S ALL SO UNFAIR POOOOOOR ME WHAAAAAAAAAHHHH

Everything that goes wrong for her always is as a result of her own stupidity. She makes idiot decisions, never learns, then sits there on a Sunday just waiting for her readers sympathy. As we know, that has previously involved people many times poorer sending her their cash. Really hope nobody does it this time.

Glad Dave's avoiding her. Wish he would write an article. Now that would be interesting

Hi Liz Can you STFU now and instead of moaning try learning from all your mistakes. By your age you must have worked out how to keep a roof over your head. Everyone else has and all on a smidgen of what you earn.