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Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4)
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Harriet Vane
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by Neio:
“That would explain how she has a six-figure salary (I remember in the past it was described as being around the £400,000 mark), and yet supposedly doesn't have any money.”

I do remember reading in Private Eye probably around 3 years ago that she was on close to a seven figure salary - but that was before she got fired from the weekly rag for her CBB appearance. But £400k is still (obviously) a very good screw - especially when you are like LJ and consider this to be both the gross and nett figure, i.e. without seeing the need to stump up for tax.
lomo123
31-10-2016
What happens if the house doesn't sell at the auction?.
cathrin
31-10-2016
....So, have I got this straight: she READS her partner's private emails without his consent, PUBLISHES them in her column without his consent....and yet she thinks SHE is the one with the grievance here? Aren't there laws about publishing other people's private messages? Even if Liz is unaware of this (or knows the laws but doesn't care), surely someone at the Mail is supposed to keep on top of these things, especially in this day and age?

It's lovely that D and his ex still have a good co-parenting relationship. Goodness only knows what Liz thinks she has to carp about. ....Although as always, her view on everything is so skewed, it's hard to know what to believe. I find it hard to imagine any ex-couple really communicate with the starchy formality of those messages. "If you are not too busy, maybe we can meet for coffee."? "That is very kind of you. I know you have someone new in your life." (Besides, Liz isn't new....they've been seeing each other for years, haven't they? And anyway, didn't Liz actually meet up with the ex years ago, in a scene lifted directly from Carrie's lunch with Alexandr's ex wife in SATC?)
seventhwave
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by cathrin:
“And anyway, didn't Liz actually meet up with the ex years ago, in a scene lifted directly from Carrie's lunch with Alexandr's ex wife in SATC?)”

Wasn't that his other ex, "Diminutive Gong Li", the mother of the model son? Or did she meet both?
cathrin
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by seventhwave:
“Wasn't that his other ex, ?”

Ah! Sorry, my mistake. I hadn't realised this was a different ex!
vampyre
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by cathrin:
“Ah! Sorry, my mistake. I hadn't realised this was a different ex!”

Yeah, someone new for Lizard to torment.
lemonbun
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by lomo123:
“What happens if the house doesn't sell at the auction?.”

It will sell. The minimum guide price is £500,000, but the reserve price may be rather lower.

It is a more than a decent house for £500,000, but the prices of 'expensive' houses in the Dales (Yorkshire and Tees) are falling through the floor. There are so many for sale and they are taking years to sell.
Ber
31-10-2016
Originally Posted by amikolaichek:
“Of course, as I think someone mentioned a few weeks back, maybe the IVA has now morphed into bankruptcy proceedings. To be honest, I've always wondered how some high profile bankrupts, in the public eye (mentioning no names) [b]declare themselves bankrupt, leaving fuming creditors....then later, merrily set up another venture... which also goes bust, leaving fuming creditors...”

Originally Posted by vampyre:
“
That happens an awful lot and I do wish the law was tightened up to put an end to it.”

The 'spirit' of the law is not to unduly punish small business people, sole traders, etc. who's financial circumstances may not be their fault. E.G if their bankruptcy is a consequence of someone stiffing them for cash and not settling their hills and so on. Also, in theory it's the 'company' that goes bankrupt and not the person themselves so they are free to start-up again.

Also, it's worth remembering that in a personal bankruptcy the OR will claim a percentage of any disposable income after essentials are covered. For Joe Blow on £20k a year their disposable could be £100 so the OR will take 50% of that. For someone on £400k a year they will still have a lot of disposable income even if the OR takes 90% of it.
sqwerty505
01-11-2016
I think her house looks pretty spartan, compared to the "before" pics (okay, it had carpet then, and that's probably not considered as chic as bare floorboards, but no curtains either). It looks not very homely, and sparsely furnished. Otherwise it's a lovely house.
amikolaichek
01-11-2016
It looks what I call quite 'cosy' in the 'before' pictures. But I suppose that 'cosy' would be an anathema to Liz. But she must have spent a small fortune on the place - ripping out a perfectly acceptable kitchen - then moaning that she didn't have a kitchen and having to use the one in the 'cottage' .... and then making a new kitchen in the basement. Can't remember what other 'improvement' she made - was there something about flooring?

Wonder what the place will fetch at auction.
amikolaichek
01-11-2016
Oh, just looked at the details about the place on the website about the upcoming January auction. https://www.robinjessop.co.uk/auctions/
It states in part: Lawn House has been the subject of part renovation where a damp proof course, new boiler system and all the original floor boards have been beautifully restored.

So the floor has been restored, whatever that means (presumably carpets taken up, original wood sanded/polished or something). But - correct me if I'm wrong - wasn't Liz bleating recently that she had sold or was selling her new central heating boiler? Along with the Vera Wang or Whatever jacket etc. etc?
fizzycat
01-11-2016
Originally Posted by amikolaichek:
“ But - correct me if I'm wrong - wasn't Liz bleating recently that she had sold or was selling her new central heating boiler? Along with the Vera Wang or Whatever jacket etc. etc?”

Yes, it was on the list of stuff she was selling to be able to afford to eat or have her knees steamed or whatever stupidity she was prioritising that week. I imagined the estate agent reading that after the house was on the market with a functioning boiler as part of the package.

ETA - it's in this one - http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/...tips-edge.html

I told her I’ve sold everything: my Wang jacket, a Temperley slip dress, Louboutin sparkly shoes, Tod’s clutch, my desk, my Bang & Olufsen TV, Bang & Olufsen hi-fi, the spare alloys from my Mercedes: no use to me now, though I had thought of balancing them upright, sitting in the middle of them, pretending I still have a nice car.

I’ve even got my boiler up for sale, as I can’t afford Flogas to feed it: it’s on for £1,000, though I was charged £4,500 to have it installed; no takers. I have just decided to sell my Vogues: every single issue since April 1978. I soon won’t have anywhere to put them, anyway.

Last edited by fizzycat : 01-11-2016 at 19:39
Jennifer_Jones2
01-11-2016
Hi Amikolaichek

I think the boiler was mentioned as having been put on E Bay, but I would have thought the agents or whoever is responsible for the house could stop her doing that.

What amazes me is why is she staying in the same area (if indeed she is), as she's going to have the same travel problems and still not going to be flush enough to buy a much better car.

(Hope you are OK.)
lomo123
01-11-2016
Jennifer Jones
That's exactly what I was thinking, why stay in the area that she hates, and is miles from everywhere she needs to be.
The only reason I could think of would be the horses.
Forgot about the boiler story, I,ve been on my uppers loads of times, but it's never crossed my mind to sell the household boiler!
amikolaichek
01-11-2016
Originally Posted by Jennifer_Jones2:
“Hi Amikolaichek

I think the boiler was mentioned as having been put on E Bay, but I would have thought the agents or whoever is responsible for the house could stop her doing that.

What amazes me is why is she staying in the same area (if indeed she is), as she's going to have the same travel problems and still not going to be flush enough to buy a much better car.

(Hope you are OK.)”

Didn't realise she was probably staying in the same area - have I missed something? Oh, joy unconfined for her new neighbours! Still, I suppose she has to be near the horses, not to mention Nic, who presumably still looks after the nags, dogs, pussies, when Jones is 'working'.

Surely she hasn't flogged the Flogas boiler! I recall, from one of her earlier books, how she moaned about when she moved into the Exmoor place because the previous owners had taken just about everything normally left by reasonable sellers (hmm, wonder how true THAT is). Ah well - whoever is considering bidding in the auction for the house - I just hope that they've done their homework first and made sure a boiler is in situ.

I'm OK, Jennifer_Jones - but still debating whether to do it or not ... (hip replacement). I'm quite sprightly on sticks or crutches, zipping (OK, limping) around Islington. When I'm in Upper Street, I always look out for Liz near SpaceNK or Abigail Aherne. Or that lovely foodie place Ottolenghi that I've never dared enter but I think Liz has mentioned it.
sqwerty505
01-11-2016
Fizzycat,

"have her knees steamed" - so funny!

(that's not an actual thing, is it? Mine are in need of attention.)
Jennifer_Jones2
01-11-2016
Hi Amilokaichek

I don't know where she's going to live but she drove to Leyland (nearby) to deliver the rental agreement, so I imagine she may be renting via the agent who9 is selling, which would also explain no problems with her credit history.

I don't think she has a horse now (Nic does), only 2 rescue ponies that could easily have gone to a charity. Perhaps she's staying around for Isabel, her friend, who looks after the dogs when she's away?

I think the hip thing is fairly risk free nowadays, especially if you have an excellent surgeon. Thought I was going to need a surgeon on Friday - electricians left steps in situ up to roof so I tottered up to look for missing cat who came out like a cruise missile, leaving me to go one way and the steps another!!
amikolaichek
02-11-2016
Originally Posted by sqwerty505:
“Fizzycat,

"have her knees steamed" - so funny!

(that's not an actual thing, is it? Mine are in need of attention.)”

Steaming knees? Who knows. But I'm surprised that our Liz hasn't taken up an exotic procedure that was raved about by the incredible Gwyneth Paltrow on her excruciatingly smart website 'Goop'. (NO idea why I'm signed up for Goop's newletter - I never asked to be). Anyway, Gwynnie does steaming - but not of her knees but somewhere north of the knees and not usually a place one would consider a comfortable place to steam ... read this if you dare (but with your legs crossed):
http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/20...dical-science/

All I can add is, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.
fizzycat
02-11-2016
Originally Posted by amikolaichek:
“All I can add is, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.”

Or anywhere else.

I'm not sure knee steaming exists anywhere in the real world but as Our Liz seems to be the only person who knows about having teeth steam cleaned, the truth could be out there somewhere in LizWorld.

(Being very picky here for a moment - I'm sure both dizzy ladies are referring to water vapour not steam. Steam is invisible and at the boiling point of the liquid producing it so you really wouldn't want steam in contact with any body part. Once you can see it, it's not steam any more)
BellaFiga
02-11-2016
Foo-steaming sounds like some Victorian treatment for the pox.
vampyre
02-11-2016
Originally Posted by amikolaichek:
“Steaming knees? Who knows. But I'm surprised that our Liz hasn't taken up an exotic procedure that was raved about by the incredible Gwyneth Paltrow on her excruciatingly smart website 'Goop'. (NO idea why I'm signed up for Goop's newletter - I never asked to be). Anyway, Gwynnie does steaming - but not of her knees but somewhere north of the knees and not usually a place one would consider a comfortable place to steam ... read this if you dare (but with your legs crossed):
http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/20...dical-science/

All I can add is, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.”

It must have passed you by, (lucky you) but this was a thing a while ago and was demonstrated on This Morning.
Again, fizzycat and yours truly would get antsy about the misnomer as the target area
is the vulva.
BellaFiga
02-11-2016
Actually, Goopy said 'A combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al.'

She must have the filthiest of uteruses if it needs steam cleaning. I suggest a Kärcher.
vampyre
02-11-2016
Originally Posted by BellaFiga:
“Actually, Goopy said 'A combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al.'

She must have the filthiest of uteruses if it needs steam cleaning. I suggest a Kärcher.”

Ah then there are two separate procedures or one gullible actor.
The This Morning thing is to precipitate a cosmetic enhancement, rejuvenation.
Unless Gwynnie has a fantastically unusual anatomy, what she's on about would have to be invasive to some degree.
And dragging this thread back on topic (although 'procedures' are so Lizard), there are numerous photographs of her naked, including the fake tan ones, and she's certainly not the waif like physique she thinks she is and that is a good thing.
BellaFiga
02-11-2016
More dangerously, a gullible actor who thinks she knows better than scientists. Mugwort steam up the uterus indeed.

Anyway yeah back to Liz Jones. I bet she's had a go at foo steaming. Probably with a kettle though, given that she's hard up.
vampyre
02-11-2016
Originally Posted by BellaFiga:
“More dangerously, a gullible actor who thinks she knows better than scientists. Mugwort steam up the uterus indeed.

Anyway yeah back to Liz Jones. I bet she's had a go at foo steaming. Probably with a kettle though, given that she's hard up.”

An expensive designer kettle.
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