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Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4)
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DS Forum Support
23-11-2016
A large number of posts have been removed from this thread. Please cut out the bickering with each other and attacks on other posts. We will be issuing suspensions to anyone that continues this conduct following this warning.
auntiem
23-11-2016
Back on topic, I can't understand why Liz isn't moving back into London or at least Home Counties commutable. She often says that selling her London flat was the biggest mistake, and most of her life is still in London. Has she so little self-awareness that she cannot see where her life needs to be.
seventhwave
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by auntiem:
“Back on topic, I can't understand why Liz isn't moving back into London or at least Home Counties commutable. She often says that selling her London flat was the biggest mistake, and most of her life is still in London. Has she so little self-awareness that she cannot see where her life needs to be.”

Possibly because housing is much more affordable in Yorkshire, and in London she'll find it much harder to rent anywhere that will accommodate her animals (the horses would have to go for a start.) As she recently found when the landlady reacted badly to Liz casually mentioning in a text that she'd be bringing a bunch of untrained collies with her
BellaFiga
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by DS Forum Support:
“A large number of posts have been removed from this thread. Please cut out the bickering with each other and attacks on other posts. We will be issuing suspensions to anyone that continues this conduct following this warning.”

Oh Digispy Headmaster. You need to be more specific. I don't think there has been much bickering actually (we are far too busy for that really) but what is this conduct you are warning us of? Do tell. Suspension sounds blissfully like school.
Suzy_Cat
24-11-2016
There was a lot of sniping about certain aspects of content in this thread; some older participants had taken against the posts of newer ones and were making their feelings known on a personal level. I am glad the spatting is gone and we can concentrate on the glories of Dreary life.

I get that Liz probably can't realistically find a place in London given her menagerie, but surely she could find somewhere nearer to London that is suitable? She went from one end of England to the other pretty much, didn't she? Why not look for something within an hour of London? I am sure they exist.
Rubbish Name
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by Suzy_Cat:
“There was a lot of sniping about certain aspects of content in this thread; some older participants had taken against the posts of newer ones and were making their feelings known on a personal level. I am glad the spatting is gone and we can concentrate on the glories of Dreary life.

I get that Liz probably can't realistically find a place in London given her menagerie, but surely she could find somewhere nearer to London that is suitable? She went from one end of England to the other pretty much, didn't she? Why not look for something within an hour of London? I am sure they exist.”

Back to her Chelmsford roots?!
Polomini
24-11-2016
You know, it's all very well saying that Liz's horses "will have to go", as has been said many times on here, but have you any idea just how hard that is to actually do? I'm not just talking emotionally, though that's hard enough when you're attached to them, but in a practical sense. I seem to remember that her horses/ponies are rescue cases themselves and aren't able to be ridden, so are essentially field ornaments.

I've got one of those - a horse that was given to me to keep my old horse company, and while I had my own field that was fine. Now I don't, and for various other reasons, I can't keep this horse and need to rehome her. But she's getting on, and due to an old injury she can't be ridden, even though she's in robust health and hasn't needed the vet for at least five years. Very few people are willing to take on a horse that can't be ridden, and horse sanctuaries are full to overflowing, so for the most part they are only taking genuine welfare (ie cruelty/neglect) cases.

So what's the option? You can't sell your horse, you can't give it away... The unpleasant truth is that in a lot of cases it's either the meat man or being put to sleep at home (which isn't cheap, by the way). Which, for an otherwise healthy horse, is an unpalatable choice to have to make.

So whatever else you criticise LJ for - and there's plenty - please cut her a bit of slack here. I'm sure she will be doing her best (as we all do who are in this position) to find a better alternative for her horses than destruction.
Rubbish Name
24-11-2016
She hasn't even mentioned them in all the talk of the move though, has she? She's mentioned her 3 dogs and the 16 or 17 cats but I assumed that either the horses are already sorted with accommodation where they are now, or she's forgotten she had any. She drinks, you know
Ber
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rubbish Name:
“Back to her Chelmsford roots?!”

Dont even joke about that! We dont want her :-0
Amused Harpy
24-11-2016
In which people want payment although they know I've no money - how very dare they!

This week's Dreary hasn't even reached the point where the Baker has 'kidnapped' the cat. She wrote about this in the Mail on Sunday on 30th October but still hasn't mentioned the outcome by 20th November. I hope Prudence is back with Domino Darling.

I don't believe she left her furniture and prized possessions in the house. Maybe they're in storage. Surely Isobel would know someone who could help her move for a cheaper rate than the one quoted or even ask friends with vans to help out.

If she knew she wasn't going to move to that house in Reeth, it's no wonder David took Prudence because he'd wonder where she was going to be re-housed. While on the subject of cats, what's happened to all the other ones? Has she asked Celia
Hammond to take them back or has she given them to the local Cats' Protection League for rehoming? I wonder what will happen to the horses as well.

She says she's insolvent yet she considered going to Belsize Park in London, the rent of which will cost a fortune. Perhaps now that the owner has asked for more money in advance, this move has also fallen through. If so, where is she living now?

Confused? You will be if , like me, you keep on reading her Dreary. It never seems to make a lot of sense
Lizzyroz
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by Amused Harpy:
“ Surely Isobel would know someone who could help her move for a cheaper rate than the one quoted or even ask friends with vans to help out.”

But she's always complaining she has no friends. Even the sainted Isobel seems to have played no significant part in the Dreary for months.
Suzy_Cat
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by Polomini:
“You know, it's all very well saying that Liz's horses "will have to go", as has been said many times on here, but have you any idea just how hard that is to actually do? I'm not just talking emotionally, though that's hard enough when you're attached to them, but in a practical sense. I seem to remember that her horses/ponies are rescue cases themselves and aren't able to be ridden, so are essentially field ornaments.*snip*
So whatever else you criticise LJ for - and there's plenty - please cut her a bit of slack here. I'm sure she will be doing her best (as we all do who are in this position) to find a better alternative for her horses than destruction.”

This is fair enough. But what with Nic and her own horses, you'd think she'd have contacts to deal with that.
BellaFiga
24-11-2016
Perhaps Sue Needleman is taking all the animals. And furniture. And empty Prosecco bottles.
Suzy_Cat
25-11-2016
Originally Posted by Amused Harpy:
“In which people want payment although they know I've no money - how very dare they!

This week's Dreary hasn't even reached the point where the Baker has 'kidnapped' the cat. She wrote about this in the Mail on Sunday on 30th October but still hasn't mentioned the outcome by 20th November. I hope Prudence is back with Domino Darling.

I don't believe she left her furniture and prized possessions in the house. Maybe they're in storage. Surely Isobel would know someone who could help her move for a cheaper rate than the one quoted or even ask friends with vans to help out.

If she knew she wasn't going to move to that house in Reeth, it's no wonder David took Prudence because he'd wonder where she was going to be re-housed. While on the subject of cats, what's happened to all the other ones? Has she asked Celia
Hammond to take them back or has she given them to the local Cats' Protection League for rehoming? I wonder what will happen to the horses as well.

She says she's insolvent yet she considered going to Belsize Park in London, the rent of which will cost a fortune. Perhaps now that the owner has asked for more money in advance, this move has also fallen through. If so, where is she living now?

Confused? You will be if , like me, you keep on reading her Dreary. It never seems to make a lot of sense”

I do rather wish that DD would post to let us know what, if anything, has happened with Prudence. And I also wonder whether she really had as many cats as she's implied. Unlike the "puppies", very few of them have been named. There is the deceased Squeaky, and Prudence - who else? It's conceivable that the only cat she actually HAS is/was Prudence.

The Catnapping Incident must be due to appear in perhaps a fortnight's time? Maybe even, if we are "lucky", this Sunday.
BellaFiga
25-11-2016
She can have my cat if she likes. The little bugger tries to escape all the time. I'm sure she would love some puppies to play with.
amikolaichek
25-11-2016
How about looking at somewhere in Kent or Sussex? Not that far to get into London, or to airports? Mind you, I've no idea of prices in those areas. But parts very rural still and I'm sure she'd find pasture for her horses.
amikolaichek
25-11-2016
Originally Posted by Lizzyroz:
“But she's always complaining she has no friends. Even the sainted Isobel seems to have played no significant part in the Dreary for months.”

I think that a few Diaries back, she said that Isobel was looking after the three dogs. Can't be bothered to check, though.
Jennifer_Jones2
25-11-2016
She was away overnight so Isobel had the dogs in her kitchen and Sam (the dog with two names - ? Michael) howled at a radiator all night.

Rehoming any sort of animal is very difficult indeed at present, but she has had long enough to prepare for it. Isobel had some sheep, I think, so perhaps she may have the horses/ponies of perhaps Nic could look after them?

More relevant is what is happening to her poor sister, who was awarded a home by a Court as she had put money into Liz's house in Devon and seems to have come out with nothing as well. I do hope she's ok.
lomo123
25-11-2016
Yeah, no mention of her sister, does that mean shes down the Swanee as well.
Suppose it does, what a nightmare.
Imagine working all the years she has, and being in this position, due to making bad decisions.
Jennifer_Jones2
25-11-2016
I didn't realise that there was anyone with so little financial awareness about - only youngsters who take out every credit and store card going. I mean, she had worked in salaried positions, so she would have known about tax, NI and pensions and surely have wondered what to do about them when she went self employed? Plus she has so little to show for her spending, no vast wardrobes, cupboards of shoes, jewellery, not even much in her house. I wondered at first if it was a sort of joke/test on her readership, but the IVA gives the lie to that. How her editor and the Editor in Chief of the Mail can think so little of one of their writers,beggars belief and gives me a very low opinion of them!
seventhwave
26-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rubbish Name:
“She hasn't even mentioned them in all the talk of the move though, has she? She's mentioned her 3 dogs and the 16 or 17 cats but I assumed that either the horses are already sorted with accommodation where they are now, or she's forgotten she had any. She drinks, you know ”

Yes, that's pretty much what I thought - I know re-homing a horse isn't easy (My mother has a young, healthy one that can be ridden and even moving him a few miles down the coast is proving difficult!) But since Liz seems to take it for granted that she'll be able to move to London with just the collies I would have thought she'd found somewhere for the horses already ...

Originally Posted by Suzy_Cat:
“I do rather wish that DD would post to let us know what, if anything, has happened with Prudence. And I also wonder whether she really had as many cats as she's implied. Unlike the "puppies", very few of them have been named. There is the deceased Squeaky, and Prudence - who else? It's conceivable that the only cat she actually HAS is/was Prudence.”

She has / had one called Sweetie that was mauled by her dogs. Then when readers started contacting Celia Hammond (from whom Liz adopted Sweetie) she complained in the Dreary: "I protect Sweetie for ten years and now they're trying to have my little cat taken away from me!"

Given the wonderful job Liz did in "protecting" Sweetie from the dogs though, and Sweetie must be quite old for a cat (if she were a kitten when Liz adopted her, she'd be 11 now - otherwise older) it's quite possible she is no more
Suzy_Cat
27-11-2016
PRUDENCE GATE IS HERE!!! And clearly being milked, as there's little to it yet. I went back to the previous week's Dreary for some context for the opening paragraph. When last we met Liz and the Baker, they'd had a spat about his pasta, so she buried herself in an old Audrey Hepburn movie, much as this story was buried under drifts of product placement and mopery.

I find it profoundly odd and unlikely that you would arise from your bed, find your lover already up and smoking downstairs, and greet him with "oh hi Dave" after several days together. Or indeed any. I can't remember the last time I addressed my lover, or even an ex-lover, by name on seeing them first thing in the morning. The only reason I'd even use their name to them would be to attract their attention, and if I'm ensconced with just him and me, well I'm going to go up to him and make my presence known, not say "oh hi Dave" like he's a random neighbour unexpectedly popping in to borrow sugar.

It also seems really odd that she begins the day by getting up, making coffee (such weakness, but then, she is having a tough time) and starting work, without once acknowledging David. I mean, he is THERE right? She got out of bed, did all the usual breakfasty things and then seems surprised to find him there? This does not ring true at all. Did she assume he'd run off in the night after the giant pasta row? I think she did. Or else there's some random reason why she wouldn't greet him, have coffee with him, or do any of the normal things that a couple in the same building would expect to do of a morning.

I wonder if they actually share a bed.

Then we get histronics that he left her without a car etc etc wah wah.

None of this makes the least bit of organic sense.

I wonder if we will find out that she pressed "send" on the deathless email of doom. Or perhaps she's just including it in the Dreary so he can get a spiteful virtual earful a few weeks later. A spiteful virtual earful that reveals his private financial issues and use of recreational marijuana to the world. She really is such a class act.

It does seem convenient that Prudence's food bills just happened to be issues raised in the email, quite independently of her realising Prudence had been taken home, doesn't it? Almost as though the "I didn't send it" email is just a recap of everything she said to him that night, during the Great Pasta-Related Breakup of 2016.

Shall we run a sweepstake on how long it will take for the Gruesome Twosome to make up? I reckon Christmas. One or other will send a text announcing that they miss them and it will all be on, and disappointing, again.
Zarla
27-11-2016
I wonder if David is given money every month in exchange for the slanderous things Liz writes about him.

Today, she's accused him of animal neglect (abandoning a cat at Battersea and allowing the 'open sores' on Prudence's belly to go untreated). She's also raging on about his drug habit again.

Why would he allow this kind of abuse? Surely he's getting a cut of the profits.
Suzy_Cat
27-11-2016
I can't understand why she stays with him if she objects so vociferously to him smoking pot. If it's a dealbreaker it's a dealbreaker. If it's not then don't complain that he smokes it - or reconsider whether you want to be in a relationship with someone who smokes.
Zarla
27-11-2016
Originally Posted by Suzy_Cat:
“I can't understand why she stays with him if she objects so vociferously to him smoking pot. If it's a dealbreaker it's a dealbreaker. If it's not then don't complain that he smokes it - or reconsider whether you want to be in a relationship with someone who smokes.”

It seems to me that the only reason she's with him is that she really fancied him a very long time ago, so being with him is a kind of fantasy wish fulfilment.

Liz should be with a fellow vegan animal-obsessive, but they aren't usually materialistic and wouldn't appreciate the luxury loving side of Liz. All these feral cats and incontinent collies really aren't compatible with her laundry list of designer items. She needs to choose one way or the other.
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