PRUDENCE GATE IS HERE!!! And clearly being milked, as there's little to it yet. I went back to the previous week's Dreary for some context for the opening paragraph. When last we met Liz and the Baker, they'd had a spat about his pasta, so she buried herself in an old Audrey Hepburn movie, much as this story was buried under drifts of product placement and mopery.
I find it profoundly odd and unlikely that you would arise from your bed, find your lover already up and smoking downstairs, and greet him with "oh hi Dave" after several days together. Or indeed any. I can't remember the last time I addressed my lover, or even an ex-lover, by name on seeing them first thing in the morning. The only reason I'd even use their name to them would be to attract their attention, and if I'm ensconced with just him and me, well I'm going to go up to him and make my presence known, not say "oh hi Dave" like he's a random neighbour unexpectedly popping in to borrow sugar.
It also seems really odd that she begins the day by getting up, making coffee (such weakness, but then, she is having a tough time) and starting work, without once acknowledging David. I mean, he is THERE right? She got out of bed, did all the usual breakfasty things and then seems surprised to find him there? This does not ring true at all. Did she assume he'd run off in the night after the giant pasta row? I think she did. Or else there's some random reason why she wouldn't greet him, have coffee with him, or do any of the normal things that a couple in the same building would expect to do of a morning.
I wonder if they actually share a bed.
Then we get histronics that he left her without a car etc etc wah wah.
None of this makes the least bit of organic sense.
I wonder if we will find out that she pressed "send" on the deathless email of doom. Or perhaps she's just including it in the Dreary so he can get a spiteful virtual earful a few weeks later. A spiteful virtual earful that reveals his private financial issues and use of recreational marijuana to the world. She really is such a class act.
It does seem convenient that Prudence's food bills just happened to be issues raised in the email, quite independently of her realising Prudence had been taken home, doesn't it? Almost as though the "I didn't send it" email is just a recap of everything she said to him that night, during the Great Pasta-Related Breakup of 2016.
Shall we run a sweepstake on how long it will take for the Gruesome Twosome to make up? I reckon Christmas. One or other will send a text announcing that they miss them and it will all be on, and disappointing, again.