Think DD said it wasn't even Fructis she left behind - Liz has always had a weird obsession with sneering at people that she thinks would use that brand. (Before DD, she used to drop it into farticles, and when she was with Nirps complained about him using it)

IIRC The Baker's father died a few months ago, so the car was possibly bought with some money left to The Baker in his will. Lizzie's probably jealous that when her mother died, she only left her a ''red velvet bergere suite'' (it wasn't ), an old bureau and no cash.

I am now totally confused. Who died? The Baker's father or his mother?

I think it was his father, who may have left him cash he then spent on a car, or his mother gave him cash he then spent on a car.

Either way, it was disgusting when he must have known any cash he had should have been spent on engagement rings for the mad bint.

Strewth, what a load of old cobblers! Her Dreary should be renamed Liz Jones's dire
drivel. I'm sorry for poor Prudence being caught up in the midst of all this lunacy.

I don't think we'll hear any more about Belsize Park. She probably couldn't afford the extra money the owner wanted plus I think two months rent in advance due to the fact she discovered LJ had dogs.

She's still living in Yorkshire but I think she'll find renting a property difficult on account of her habitual non-payment of creditors and owning stress-weeing and untrained dogs as well as cats and horses or should that be ponies?

I wonder if she's moved in with Nic, lodging with Isobel or perhaps both Nic and she are lodging with Isobel.

Her farticle in the Mail on Sunday was in extremely bad taste.

Who on earth writes stilted and melodramatic texts and e-mails like the ones in the Dreary? The style of writing is the same which suggests she's made them up herself. I don't believe the Baker would want to continue the 'loving' relationship they had and that he'd want to return Prudence to her. By now her continuous belittling of him would merit his sending her a short text consisting of two words to the effect she should go forth and multiply!

I bet Prudence is never mentioned again after this. I'm sure the police would be on David's side if he told them that Liz had dogs who had attacked a cat before, plus so many other felines she probably couldn't give them all her attention.

To any law enforcer, David would surely be a better bet, fixed address and only owning one pet. Plus he owned the cat before.

All it needs is one officer who reads the MoS.

Frankly, Prudence and Jones's other cats would be better off with a diet of 'Whiskas' or even 'Kitekat' or 'Sheba'. If she's feeding them mainly organic M & S prawns, with the occasional side-dish of organic chicken, this is NOT good (as I've remarked before on DS). A largely fish diet will lead to feline health problems, especially painful skin conditions. Besides, as another DS has pointed out, prawns are too fatty for cats as a regular diet.

The woman is beyond ridiculous, calling the Police over her (ex) boyfriend 'kidnapping' his own cat!

Still, waiting for the big 'Reveal' when she, The Baker, Prudence, incontinent dogs, Nic are all reconciled, there's a lovely wedding in Bobbingtwot House or wherever, she buys yet another big property she can't afford and everyone lives happily ever after (until she p*sses off the neighbours, creditors and The Baker because he leaves a dirty sock on the bedroom floor or a smudge on the Smeg fridge ...).

In which I once again present myself as a tragickal martyr whose saintly benevolence does not in any way mask a grasping, controlling and psychologically unstable core, and who at nearly 60 continues to blame every other person in my life for the fact I'm bankrupt and nobody likes me instead of looking at my own behaviours.

I am amused, despite myself, at David's clear understanding that Liz whining about the car is not really about his "lies" but about the fact he hasn't used the money to buy her a fancy effing engagement ring instead. This, right here, is why she's "in a pickle". Because someone buying her a nice rock is more important than him having a working vehicle. Similarly, David living in a flat that doesn't meet her standards is a deliberate affront to HER, not, you know, an indicator of the sort of person he is, his income and his personal standards. If you don't like someone's house, or personality, or the fact they have children with women other than you, don't go into hysterics trying to force them to change these things.

Run David! Run for your life!

ETA: Oh and I love how the "close relative" in the email is very clearly one of her two brothers. Don't even bother playing coy when you then write "our mother"...

The old harpy who's spent all her working life trying to buy friendshiip has the nerve to write a farticle claiming Mick Jagger is only attractive because of his money. Now, I don't have the same insight into to Jagger approach to friends and lovers as I have into hers, but however he relates to people ... pot meet kettle.

I wish she wouldn't use the dreadful word barren to describe herself,I am sure it is done deliberately to offend women who are childless due to fertility problems.
So the baker's mother expressly asked him not to tell LJ that she paid for the car and we know why.Yet she still publishes this.Spiteful moo.

More unpleasant vitriol duly reported to an sceptical readership. Claiming that David called her a 'deaf bint' doesn't ring true for me, that's a word that she uses periodically to describe herself, as in 'cloth eared bint' the last time she was complaining about restaurants being too noisy. But the bit that really grates with me is yet another claim that she is somehow not responsible for the 'pickle' in which she finds herself. Plenty of people don't 'do' financials - I am one of them - but I make sure that I employ competent people to sort these out for me. And if one of them was to say to me something along the lines of 'you are living beyond your means' I would take this on board and make appropriate changes to correct the situation. I would not, for example, hear this as a green light to buy another Dipstick candle, book another spa weekend or take on another lame pony or incontinent dog. I have been re-reading some of her archive recently, and it is clear that she was receiving this message many, many, years ago - and steadfastly refusing to act on it. And yet, she still views her woes as something done to her, not something that she is entirely, and solely, responsible for herself. In spite of all her so-called 'feminism', she still wants some man to step in and make it all better for her. That's not any sort of feminism that I recognise.

Ye gods, the woman contains bile by the bucket-full. She just can’t let it go – that The Baker DARED to buy a car AND see an ex, the mother of his child. Without telling her. ‘ He kept things from me, important things’. What the hell does it have to do with her? And The Baker's mother asked him to keep her cash gift to him quiet ... so Jones blabs it out in her Diary. How spiteful. Oh yes, another reference to the ‘token’ engagement ring. And the nasty allusion to her ‘close relative’, making sure we’d all know who it is.

Then she dares to say that her present misfortune isn’t her fault. I quote: ‘ I haven’t got myself into anything. It is other people who have done this to me.’


So that’s OK then. Don’t pay your creditors. Don’t pay your income tax. But it’s not her fault - it’s happened because she’s so generous – but people only want to know her when she’s got money. Then the usual wail: ‘I haven’t eaten for three days’ … and didn’t you just love her bitter comment that even her old cleaner in London had a car. How very dare a CLEANER have a car, when Jones hasn’t.

The ‘Farticle’ about Mick Jagger – hard to know where to start. She manages to include yet another swipe at her poor family: ‘(If the Jagger clan are anything like mine, they will have all been getting the calculator out last week, figuring out how much their inheritance has plummeted in value because of the new arrival)’.


Best worst quote from the whole load of garbage is about ballet dancers and why Sir Mick goes for them: ‘… the fact they’re not too cerebral’. Nasty.

Let’s face it. Jones absolutely loathes women. She seethes with resentment, jealousy and spite. In fact, she seems to hate just about everyone, including her (ex?) fiancé, family and friends. One could almost feel sorry for someone so chronically resentful of everyone and everything.

I can’t help comparing her drivel with the moving, beautifully written final article by the journalist A. A. Gill who died yesterday. It’s in today’s Sunday Times. Not a bit of self-pity, whining, blaming others, or ‘why-did-it-happen-to-ME?’ - now that’s brilliant writing. By a man who was literally on his death-bed, in a great deal of pain, when he wrote it.

At least staying in the house until the auction will give her something to write about in the dreary - the nasty estate agents arranging appointments fo viewers who are only there to pick over the bones of her calamity.

Who the hell would be Liz Jones cleaner?

Someone who didn't expect to be paid?

Don't forget that her mother was a ballet dancer. Double-dig.

Gosh, yes, I'd forgotten that, Rubbish Name. Indeed a double-dig. Nasty.

What a nasty bitter Diary this week - well up to its usual (admittedly low) standard. Not sure I can take much more of their petty arguments carried out by email. And just WHY is she so obsessed about his mother buying him a car and also seeing the mother of their child. None of her business! A glimpse, I think into the frankly infantile workings of her mind which I would rather not hear amy more of !!

Lis is obsessed about his mum giving him money she could have had off him to spend on herself, and she doesn't want him spending anything on his children or their mother either! She's as addicted to spending money as some people are to cocaine, hence the remark about an engagement ring. If you look back in her archive you will see that, after her mother died, she got her grandmother's ring and talked about using that as she rather liked it. If David got her a rock, HMRC would take it off her!!!

Rhymes with witch.

What a pathetic saddo. She genuinely seems to imagine that this kind of bile proves that she's incisive and take-charge. She can't take charge of an automobile or an incontinent dog.
She's about the last person in the world that ANYONE would want to spend as little as twelve minutes with.

Have I got this wrong? Did she not notice Prudence was gone for THREE WEEKS?? We have two cats here, and if one of them was missing we'd know within two or three hours. How could you claim to be providing these expensive foods for cats and not notice, eeh oop, one's not here for her prawns?? Not noticing a cat is missing for three weeks sounds somewhat similar to not noticing a two year old was missing for 36 hours. Careless. Unconcerned. God, by all means, take the cat away from this woman!

Especially given the histrionics and midnight screaming "get here NOW" after Hilda went missing for five minutes,

Two or three days I think. Not three weeks. It depends on what day it was when David left. She noticed Prudence was missing "on Thursday" and said a day had gone by with no communications after David left. The implication is that it's the next day or two.

It was three days before she noticed the cat was missing. Frankly, it wouldn't have taken me more than a day to worry if a cat of mine went AWOL.

To be fair to her (much though it pains me to say that), he left in the morning and she noticed that night that Prudence was not there:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...ng-kidnap.html

It depends on the cat's normal habits - I would notice if a cat that didn't wander far was missing sooner than an adventurous one I only expected to reappear at meal times. It took her a while to cotton on the David might have taken her, though.

My apologies - you are quite correct. She did notice the missing cat earlier.

Still, glad The Baker has taken Prudence back. With Jones's problems ... where oh where is she going to end up living ... at least one animal will have some security. Even if the puss is a victim to passive smoking!