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Whould you let your 17 year old Daughter date a 24 year old man?


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Old 04-02-2013, 14:38
Nigel Goodwin
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That and the gym knickers and pigtails
And that's just the boy

I can't say I've ever found gym knickers attractive (on either sex!).
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:39
2shy2007
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Why didn't it last?
Oh its so long ago, but I suppose we both grew out of the relationship, does it really matter why?
He is still a good friend though, we both remember that relationship fondly, there was nothing wrong or dirty just because I was 6 years younger so what? at the time it was right for us both.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:39
LykkieLi
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Well, if there are qualities that a 30 year old woman has that a 24 year old woman does not have (and there are), then logically it can be said that there are going to be qualities that an 18/19 year old might have that a 24 year old does not. People are different at different age groups.

I think some men like the idea of innocence. Most 24 year old girls have been around the block a few times, if you know what I mean. There is something refreshing about a girl who is fairly new to the whole dating world. Sure, you can get this quality in women in their mid-20s, but it is much rarer. Also, 18 and 19 year old girls usually have less of an attitude, they're more willing to learn and to have a man take the lead. You can understand why these qualities can be attractive to men.

But saying that, there are also reasons why I would find a 24 year old woman, or a much older woman, more attractive to date than an 18 year old girl.
Really, 18 year olds have less attitude than 24 year olds? I find teenagers have more attitude.
Are 24 year olds not attracted to you because they sense you're looking for someone more malleable?
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:42
LykkieLi
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Cheers, none was meant by me either, I'm just used to more robust discussions I guess.
As a mother, if I had a 17 year old daughter I would have a strong distaste of the man trying to date her, I'm just responding to the OPs question.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:43
Miss XYZ
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You won't find many of them that are that honest

He was someone I was close to and he'd open up to me a lot, so I think that's the only reason he admitted it to me. It just seemed wrong, the way he'd use so many young girls. With him being in his 20s he obviously looked like an adult, but the girls looked like kids to me, and it was like they thought he was some kind of God.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:43
LykkieLi
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Oh its so long ago, but I suppose we both grew out of the relationship, does it really matter why?
He is still a good friend though, we both remember that relationship fondly, there was nothing wrong or dirty just because I was 6 years younger so what? at the time it was right for us both.
It's okay, I'm not your mother, you don't have to feel defensive.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:44
Jumbobones
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Dirty paedos the lot of them
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:45
Scuby
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My son married a girl 9 years younger than him, they were together for some times before that and now after 10 years married they are as happy as ever.

Her paernts were not worried about it, in fact they took our son into their family and treated him as one of their own.

Like any relationship, some work some dont
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:45
Freeman000
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Really, 18 year olds have less attitude than 24 year olds? I find teenagers have more attitude.
Are 24 year olds not attracted to you because they sense you're looking for someone more malleable?
Maybe not less of an attitude, but more of a cute/harmless attitude. As a woman gets older, she generally becomes more cynical, and the attitude becomes more masculine. In other words, a woman who is well into her 20s is less likely to put up with men trying to take the lead in the relationship, and she will look to assert herself more. Contrary to what modern day feminism will have you believe, this is unfeminine, and men recognise this.

Another factor is what women look for in a relationship. Women who are in their mid or late 20s are very much considering what a man can offer them financially. Whereas 18/19 year old girls are likely to be focused on having fun.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:46
LykkieLi
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Dirty paedos the lot of them
How do you figure that? 17/18 year olds aren't prepubescent.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:48
LykkieLi
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Maybe not less of an attitude, but more of a cute/harmless attitude. As a woman gets older, she generally becomes more cynical, and the attitude becomes more masculine. In other words, a woman who is well into her 20s is less likely to put up with men trying to take the lead in the relationship, and she will look to assert herself more. Contrary to what modern day feminism will have you believe, this is unfeminine, and men recognise this.

Another factor is what women look for in a relationship. Women who are in their mid or late 20s are very much considering what a man can offer them financially. Whereas 18/19 year old girls are likely to be focused on having fun.
So what happens when the 18 year old turns 24?

Are you a bit intimidated by grown women?
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:49
avasgranny
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When my daughter as 15 she was with a lad of 17 for 2 years. When she was 18 she started seeing a 40 year old guy. We met and really liked this guy too. He was a decent bloke who really looked out for her as well as really loved her. Sadly things didn't work out and when she was 20 she started seeing a 42 year old. They were together for 4 years. Can I just add my daughter is still great friends with all these guys as are we. There can't be many 17 year old girls who would listen and take the advice of their parents when it comes to lads. We all make our our mistakes.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:51
LykkieLi
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When my daughter as 15 she was with a lad of 17 for 2 years. When she was 18 she started seeing a 40 year old guy. We met and really liked this guy too. He was a decent bloke who really looked out for her as well as really loved her. Sadly things didn't work out and when she was 20 she started seeing a 42 year old. They were together for 4 years. Can I just add my daughter is still great friends with all these guys as are we. There can't be many 17 year old girls who would listen and take the advice of their parents when it comes to lads. We all make our our mistakes.
Were these grown men a bit stunted in their growth?
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:51
Freeman000
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So what happens when the 18 year old turns 24?

Are you a bit intimidated by grown women?
I guess when the 18 year old girl turns 24, the 24 year old man would then be 30. So his perspective would have shifted. Seriously, a 6 year age gap is no big deal. It's entirely natural. Especially when you consider that young women generally go for slightly older men themselves.

On your second question, not at all. I love older women. Nothing can intimidate me.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:55
LykkieLi
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I guess when the 18 year old girl turns 24, the 24 year old man would then be 30. So his perspective would have shifted. Seriously, a 6 year age gap is no big deal. It's entirely natural. Especially when you consider that young women generally go for slightly older men themselves.

On your second question, not at all. I love older women. Nothing can intimidate me.
But she'll have that attitude and cynicism! How can he bear it? He's been used to innocence and 'fun'!
Poor guy!

But you said older women are cynical and not so much 'fun'.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:55
Glawster2002
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My son married a girl 9 years younger than him, they were together for some times before that and now after 10 years married they are as happy as ever.

Her paernts were not worried about it, in fact they took our son into their family and treated him as one of their own.

Like any relationship, some work some dont
When a couple of colleagues at work started seeing each other he was pushing 40 and she was barely 20 and yet 20 years later they are still together.

As much as so many people on here love to pre-judge someone's motives I see no problem in a 24 year old going out with a 17 year old as no laws are being broken.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:57
November_Rain
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How do you figure that? 17/18 year olds aren't prepubescent.
The misuse of the word paedophile irritates me.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:58
cotton tail
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My 18 year old daughter is engaged to a man who is 10 years older, they began dating when she was 17 and knew each other for 4 years before that through involvement in a drama club.

Normally I would have been up in arms but it very much depends on the individuals concerned - my daughter is sensible and mature, her fella is teetotal and more interested in reading a good book than going out clubbing every night. They have fun and are happy together. Why should anyone have the right to tell them its wrong, no one will even think twice about it when shes 25 and hes 35
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:58
Hogzilla
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I couldn't stop her but I would tell her it was creepy.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:59
el_bardos
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Nothing can intimidate me.
Well that's true when you're hiding behind your computer screen at least.
The way you talk yourself up here makes me question how much that carries over to real life, though
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:59
LykkieLi
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When a couple of colleagues at work started seeing each other he was pushing 40 and she was barely 20 and yet 20 years later they are still together.

As much as so many people on here love to pre-judge someone's motives I see no problem in a 24 year old going out with a 17 year old as no laws are being broken.
It's not pre judging if you're correct about that particular individual.

The misuse of the word paedophile irritates me.
It was unnecessary.
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Old 04-02-2013, 14:59
RegTheHedge
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Maybe not less of an attitude, but more of a cute/harmless attitude. As a woman gets older, she generally becomes more cynical, and the attitude becomes more masculine. In other words, a woman who is well into her 20s is less likely to put up with men trying to take the lead in the relationship, and she will look to assert herself more. Contrary to what modern day feminism will have you believe, this is unfeminine, and men recognise this.

Another factor is what women look for in a relationship. Women who are in their mid or late 20s are very much considering what a man can offer them financially. Whereas 18/19 year old girls are likely to be focused on having fun.

ie They are more impressionable and easier to take advantage of...whereas women in their late 20s have wised up .
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Old 04-02-2013, 15:03
Freeman000
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But she'll have that attitude and cynicism! How can he bear it? He's been used to innocence and 'fun'!
Poor guy!

But you said older women are cynical and not so much 'fun'.

Older women have other qualities that are attractive. And I didn't say that they are all cynical and less fun, just that there is a tendency for that to be the case to some extent. This can easily be overridden by the other qualities that comes with age/experience.

You seem to be assuming that I prefer younger women to women who are my age or older. All I did was point out the attraction. If women can find men 6 years their senior to be attractive, why can't men find women 6 years younger to be attractive also?
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Old 04-02-2013, 15:04
Porcupine
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I got engaged at the age of 17 to a man who was 31. We have now been married 20yrs.
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Old 04-02-2013, 15:07
LykkieLi
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Older women have other qualities that are attractive. And I didn't say that they are all cynical and less fun, just that there is a tendency for that to be the case to some extent. This can easily be overridden by the other qualities that comes with age/experience.

You seem to be assuming that I prefer younger women to women who are my age or older. All I did was point out that the attraction. If women can find men 6 years their senior to be attractive, why can't men find women 6 years younger to be attractive also?
I haven't assumed anything, I asked you some questions which you kindly answered. Reflecting your answers back to you isn't assuming anything.
What are the older women's qualities you are attracted to?
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