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Old 12-02-2013, 16:36
queserasera
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I'd assumed something like Lesley / Leslie or Gwyn / Gwynne
Yes but they are not the same names, and it wouldn't be a problem if it was a male - female thing. I had first thought that but to give the full account i then looked at the OPs profile where he said he was male. In his post he had referred to his parftner as male. Now knowing people sometimes make spelling mistakes I didn't want to jump to conclusions
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Old 12-02-2013, 16:37
davidmcn
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No because I will be ++++++ ++++-+++++
he will be. ++++++ +++++

His name wont change. I will just be adding his surname to mine.
Ok, still sounds confusing for everyone else if you both keep the same first name though - unless you're expecting friends/family to refer to you by your surnames!
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:00
Shappy
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I fancied a guy who had the same surname as my first name e.g. If my name was Kelly Jones, his was Simon Kelly. If we had got together and got married, would I have become Kelly Kelly? Ha ha.
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:04
rjb101
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Ok, still sounds confusing for everyone else if you both keep the same first name though - unless you're expecting friends/family to refer to you by your surnames!

So this is two men named Paul getting married yes
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:04
ppaupy
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So this is two men named Paul getting married yes
Yes thats correct.
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:06
ppaupy
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Ok, still sounds confusing for everyone else if you both keep the same first name though - unless you're expecting friends/family to refer to you by your surnames!
We have been together 9 years now...friends/family etc have worked out either nicknames or ways round the same first name issue.

The surname is more of a problem due to banking/mail etc.
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:06
Shappy
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Did you find it awkward when you first got together: calling each other by your own name?
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:09
ppaupy
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Did you find it awkward when you first got together: calling each other by your own name?
Oddly for the first six weeks or so we were together I called him Alan...

I have no idea why..he just didn't seem like a Paul.

Now the only time we use our first names with each other is when we are having a go about something.
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:11
Tt88
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We have been together 9 years now...friends/family etc have worked out either nicknames or ways round the same first name issue.

The surname is more of a problem due to banking/mail etc.
My oh knows what thats like as he has the same name as his dad so often they would open each others mail.

The worst was when the nhs in his county sent out a chlamydia screening kit to everyone aged 16-25. His dad opened it and assumed my oh had sent off for it thinking he had caught something! Embarrasing or what
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:12
ppaupy
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My oh knows what thats like as he has the same name as his dad so often they would open each others mail.

The worst was when the nhs in his county sent out a chlamydia screening kit to everyone aged 16-25. His dad opened it and assumed my oh had sent off for it thinking he had caught something! Embarrasing or what
OH dear!! poor man...lol
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:20
rjb101
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Yes thats correct.
Oh Good, I was feeling very confused...
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:21
ppaupy
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Oh Good, I was feeling very confused...
All very simple and dull really...
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Old 12-02-2013, 17:38
davidmcn
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We have been together 9 years now...friends/family etc have worked out either nicknames or ways round the same first name issue.

The surname is more of a problem due to banking/mail etc.
Bear in mind there's nothing to stop you using different names for different purposes e.g. if it's easier for you to keep your existing names for banks etc you can always do that. Plenty of married women keep their maiden names for their professional life but are happy to be Mrs Bloggs at home.
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Old 13-02-2013, 08:23
ppaupy
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Bear in mind there's nothing to stop you using different names for different purposes e.g. if it's easier for you to keep your existing names for banks etc you can always do that. Plenty of married women keep their maiden names for their professional life but are happy to be Mrs Bloggs at home.
Yes that's true. Thanks.
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Old 13-02-2013, 09:52
Hogzilla
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If you kept your own name, you wouldn't have any confusion, though...?

I've been married 30 years and never took my husband's name because I'm also of the opinion I'm not his slave or dog. We alternate surnames for the dogs at the vets. And we let the kids choose their surname when they got school-age. It's not caused any problems or confusion.

Only one of my 5 kids chose to hyphenate dad and mum's name (with dad's name first) and there is a bit of a stigma attached in schools to hyphenated names as everyone assumes they're illegitimate. Sounds like a flippant point but it's the brutal truth. My other four kids - three have their dad's surname, one has mine.

I think people now are swinging back to the romance but I'd hate to have lost my identity. I have a very old West Riding surname - my husband a bland, generic name that is found all over the UK. Why would I ever want his name?

As you have the same forenames, surely it is simpler to keep your own.
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Old 13-02-2013, 10:37
ppaupy
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If you kept your own name, you wouldn't have any confusion, though...?

I've been married 30 years and never took my husband's name because I'm also of the opinion I'm not his slave or dog. We alternate surnames for the dogs at the vets. And we let the kids choose their surname when they got school-age. It's not caused any problems or confusion.

Only one of my 5 kids chose to hyphenate dad and mum's name (with dad's name first) and there is a bit of a stigma attached in schools to hyphenated names as everyone assumes they're illegitimate. Sounds like a flippant point but it's the brutal truth. My other four kids - three have their dad's surname, one has mine.

I think people now are swinging back to the romance but I'd hate to have lost my identity. I have a very old West Riding surname - my husband a bland, generic name that is found all over the UK. Why would I ever want his name?

As you have the same forenames, surely it is simpler to keep your own.

Hello..

I take on board everything you say...and the common sense part of me agrees 100%..but...

I'm of an age where growing up the thought that I would one day be able to "marry" my male partner was just a silly idea that would never be possible.

So now we can have a proper ceremony etc and be recognised as a couple in the eyes of the law,I really want to feel that we are,and part of that for me is sharing a name..silly to some i'm sure.

I dont feel the loss of identity etc,as maybe historically I dont share that loss not being a woman and feeling forced to take on her husbands family name.

As for the dogs/cats and vets..we do the same..some in his name some in mine..one in both.
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Old 13-02-2013, 10:43
goonernatalie
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I fancied a guy who had the same surname as my first name e.g. If my name was Kelly Jones, his was Simon Kelly. If we had got together and got married, would I have become Kelly Kelly? Ha ha.
I have got a penpal who first name is same as her surname except with her 1st name there is a letter differant.
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Old 14-02-2013, 11:59
ppaupy
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I have got a penpal who first name is same as her surname except with her 1st name there is a letter differant.
Now that is odd...did she marry and change her name or is it her birth name?
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Old 14-02-2013, 12:05
Shappy
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Guess it's like Boutros Boutros-Ghali.
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Old 14-02-2013, 12:53
RosieRay
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Apologies if this has been said already, but thought I'd answer your original question about what difference it makes.

I have a double barrelled name eg Smith-Jones and my friend has a double barrelled name without the hyphen eg Smith Jones. She often gets called Mrs Jones and they think Smith might be a middle name or something. That never happens to me, my name is normally correctly noted.
My husband is just Mr Jones.
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Old 14-02-2013, 13:20
ppaupy
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Apologies if this has been said already, but thought I'd answer your original question about what difference it makes.

I have a double barrelled name eg Smith-Jones and my friend has a double barrelled name without the hyphen eg Smith Jones. She often gets called Mrs Jones and they think Smith might be a middle name or something. That never happens to me, my name is normally correctly noted.
My husband is just Mr Jones.
Thank you!! that makes things so much clearer in my mind..I will be double barrelled from Easter Saturday!! lol.
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Old 15-02-2013, 20:43
RosieRay
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Many congratulations! hope you are very happy, whatever your name
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Old 15-02-2013, 21:03
jackbell
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I wonder what would happen if a John Smith met and married another John Smith?

Cool thread OP. I hope you are very happy together.
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Old 15-02-2013, 23:35
ppaupy
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Many congratulations! hope you are very happy, whatever your name
I wonder what would happen if a John Smith met and married another John Smith?

Cool thread OP. I hope you are very happy together.
Thank you both for the kind wishes.
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Old 17-02-2013, 13:54
goonernatalie
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Now that is odd...did she marry and change her name or is it her birth name?
She married, and took her hubby's surname
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