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DS LGBT members thread (Part 9)


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Old 01-03-2013, 19:55
LudwigVonDrake
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^wow.. now there's a question. Hmm, I don't know what single thing can be done. I guess that more work needs to be done in schools to help educate not only the hetrosexual side of the fence, but perhaps the LGBT side as well. After all not everyone knows or understands their own situation when they're at school.
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Old 01-03-2013, 21:17
spindiddly
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That's a bloody hard question and I wouldn't even know where to start.

At first I thought have a real crack down on the use of the word 'gay' as an insult in schools. But that only re-inforces the idea that 'gay' is actually an insult, which obviously is not the right message.

So clearly, I'm worse than useless.
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Old 01-03-2013, 21:21
LudwigVonDrake
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^I wouldn't sell yourself short. At least its a suggestion.

I guess its not a straight forward problem and solution. Certainly not something that can be solved with one legislation.
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Old 01-03-2013, 21:54
spindiddly
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It's a very complex issue. More positive gay role models in the media would be a tiny benefit but that is just the tip of the iceberg.

Including gay topics when teaching about life in schools. For example, marriage is between two loving people, over 16, unrelated, regardless of gender etc.

Gay couples featured in adverts? Although that would kick up a bit of a fuss, but it would pass. I'd like to see it treated less like an issue and for it just to be in society without a big hurrah behind it. Of course, that's a far off dream.
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Old 01-03-2013, 23:03
LudwigVonDrake
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I agree, more positive role models are really needed. Some of the out celebs we have leave a lot to be desired IMO.

And apparently we have had the occasional "gay couple" in adverts. Barclaycard was one of them.
http://youtu.be/ExL4HOShV88
Spoiler

Bit blink and you miss it, but its done right, not OTT.
Its a start though, more would be a step in the right direction.

.....

And on a completely separate note. Lazaro made it to the next round on Idol! Wooo!
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Old 02-03-2013, 00:17
ChristmasCake
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Yeah it was a bit of an unfair question, but the aim was to generate debate.

The biggest problem I feel is socio-cultural norms. It still seems acceptable for people like former Cardinal O'Brien to compare equal marriage to slavery..

Education is the way forward, but how do you change attitudes like that?

Does someone like him even consider the impact his words have on a young person struggling with their sexuality?

I think the It gets better project has been amazing, and things like that are definitely the way forward, but it's getting that message into schools, and so on, that'll really have a big effect.

I actually personally feel like I could and should be doing more. I'm not sure it's enough to be out and proud, but that I should be spreading the message that it's okay to be who you are.

I do through some voluntary work, but it's small-scale, it almost doesn't feel like it's enough.
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Old 02-03-2013, 10:59
spindiddly
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I think the best gay role models are the ones who don't make a big deal about it, but that is exactly the problem. People like Russell Tovey & NPH are great role models, but it's not them we have shoved down our throats, it's John Barrowman & Julian Clary.

What voluntary work do you do CC? I feel like us Brits are a bit too 'British' to kick up a fuss and spread the word, but I'd definitely like to do something.

And as for the religious types, I don't even know where to start with them. It's okay for them to say very nasty things because they have this shield of 'religious freedom' to stand behind. What can be done?
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Old 02-03-2013, 11:46
ChristmasCake
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I think the best gay role models are the ones who don't make a big deal about it, but that is exactly the problem. People like Russell Tovey & NPH are great role models, but it's not them we have shoved down our throats, it's John Barrowman & Julian Clary.

What voluntary work do you do CC? I feel like us Brits are a bit too 'British' to kick up a fuss and spread the word, but I'd definitely like to do something.

And as for the religious types, I don't even know where to start with them. It's okay for them to say very nasty things because they have this shield of 'religious freedom' to stand behind. What can be done?
I'm an LGBT mentor for BeatBullying's CyberMentors programme, and I'm also a Senior CyberMentor.

Religious freedom is a good thing. But religious freedom doesn't give you the right to use hate speech, I think these people need to start being arrested!
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Old 02-03-2013, 12:05
spindiddly
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Religious freedom is a gateway to blatant and open sexism and homophobia, as we have seen. Discrimination is against the law and ministers and bishops etc should all be living under the law of this country. Religious freedom allows for them to do otherwise, but it's okay.

That's really cool, I'll have to look into that. I think harsher punishments for bullying need to be implemented too.
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Old 02-03-2013, 12:11
ChristmasCake
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Religious freedom is a gateway to blatant and open sexism and homophobia, as we have seen. Discrimination is against the law and ministers and bishops etc should all be living under the law of this country. Religious freedom allows for them to do otherwise, but it's okay.

That's really cool, I'll have to look into that. I think harsher punishments for bullying need to be implemented too.
At the same time, you don't want people discriminated against because of their religion though, so religious freedom is important. I don't think it should give you the right to be discriminatory, and it's that, that we should be looking at.
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Old 02-03-2013, 12:22
spindiddly
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Why do religious people need more freedom than everyone else? They wouldn't be discriminated against because of their religion, that is illegal. They ARE free to practice their religion, they don't need religious freedom to do that. This is a liberal first world country and all people are free to do and say as they please, as long as it's lawful.

Religious freedom is a veil for lawful discrimination. Religious freedom doesn't allow anyone to practice their religion, that's just freedom.
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Old 02-03-2013, 13:44
Joe Bloggs
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Sorry for saying hello on sunday and then disappearing again
All is good here! How are all you lovely people?

I actually met someone a few weeks ago who turned out to be a member of this forum... he's probably reading this


That awkward moment when you meet someone off Grindr and you both turn out to be Digital Spy geeks.

Hello gays.
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Old 02-03-2013, 19:34
sjc2007
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Hey gaybears.
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Old 02-03-2013, 20:40
LudwigVonDrake
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^Hey there!

I think the best gay role models are the ones who don't make a big deal about it, but that is exactly the problem. People like Russell Tovey & NPH are great role models, but it's not them we have shoved down our throats, it's John Barrowman & Julian Clary.
I hear you there! I guess people still buy into the stereotype and that's why Barrowman gets more prominence.


....

Just seen this on a blog, quite thought provoking, and kind of in keeping with the current discussions we've been having. Its a hidden camera segment on an ABC programme called "What Would You Do?"
A gay couple and their children are in a restaurant and the waitress does not approve....
http://youtu.be/5JibZ2U3o-M
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Old 02-03-2013, 23:40
ChristmasCake
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Why do religious people need more freedom than everyone else? They wouldn't be discriminated against because of their religion, that is illegal. They ARE free to practice their religion, they don't need religious freedom to do that. This is a liberal first world country and all people are free to do and say as they please, as long as it's lawful.

Religious freedom is a veil for lawful discrimination. Religious freedom doesn't allow anyone to practice their religion, that's just freedom.

But that's only because it seems institutionally acceptable for people to break discrimination laws based on the fact that they are religious.

They'd only have to arrest one person for hate speech for it to stop!

^Hey there!


I hear you there! I guess people still buy into the stereotype and that's why Barrowman gets more prominence.


....

Just seen this on a blog, quite thought provoking, and kind of in keeping with the current discussions we've been having. Its a hidden camera segment on an ABC programme called "What Would You Do?"
A gay couple and their children are in a restaurant and the waitress does not approve....
http://youtu.be/5JibZ2U3o-M
I watch what would you do a lot, and there was a rather upsetting one where they had a gay kid being bullied by his peers, and most people just walked by.
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Old 03-03-2013, 17:15
LudwigVonDrake
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I watch what would you do a lot, and there was a rather upsetting one where they had a gay kid being bullied by his peers, and most people just walked by.
That's terrible. Does really make you think "what you you do".

What also surprised me in the video was their highlighting that they did it in NYC and less people stood up to the waiter. Guess part of that can be attributed to it being a big city, a lot of folk just get on with their own lives, whereas a rural town in Texas probably has more of the old fashioned community spirit still alive.
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Old 03-03-2013, 22:02
Pablo Diablo
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That awkward moment when you meet someone off Grindr and you both turn out to be Digital Spy geeks.

Hello gays.
Oh hello
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Old 03-03-2013, 22:16
ChristmasCake
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That's terrible. Does really make you think "what you you do".

What also surprised me in the video was their highlighting that they did it in NYC and less people stood up to the waiter. Guess part of that can be attributed to it being a big city, a lot of folk just get on with their own lives, whereas a rural town in Texas probably has more of the old fashioned community spirit still alive.
You're more likely to get the bystander effect in big cities rather than rural towns. It's quite sad, but people often think that someone else will intervene. If everyone thinks that, no-one will...

I saw a lad being picked on while I was at work, I jumped right in, pretty impulsively, which thinking about it could have actually lost me my job, but at that point I just saw red.
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Old 04-03-2013, 17:22
spindiddly
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Boys, I have a question.

Is it okay to use a picture of someone when going to the hairdressers, rather than trying to describe what you want them to do?

Or is it just a gay step too far?
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Old 04-03-2013, 17:49
LudwigVonDrake
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I saw a lad being picked on while I was at work, I jumped right in, pretty impulsively, which thinking about it could have actually lost me my job, but at that point I just saw red.
Well so long as you did what you could to help within the requirements of the workplace then I'm sure you would have been all right. Surely its a good thing that people are looking out for their fellow employees.

Boys, I have a question.

Is it okay to use a picture of someone when going to the hairdressers, rather than trying to describe what you want them to do?

Or is it just a gay step too far?
Hmmm... interesting one. It could be a bit much, but if the salon in question is quite a trendy place (or at least modern) then I don't see why not. Probably happens more than you think.
If its one of these old timey places where they still have combs in jars disinfectant and its like stepping back in time to the '60's, then yeah maybe, but even then you might be surprised. After all even these old places have the model photos on the walls.
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Old 04-03-2013, 18:05
spindiddly
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What I might do is try using a verbal description and if it doesn't end up how I want it I'll just go again in a few weeks and show a picture on my phone.

Such pressing issues in my life. Is this what they mean by a 'first world problem'?
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Old 04-03-2013, 18:33
LudwigVonDrake
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What I might do is try using a verbal description and if it doesn't end up how I want it I'll just go again in a few weeks and show a picture on my phone.
Good idea, and if you've got a internet capable phone you can just tell them that you'll Google it. (Unless its a guy who specialises in *ahem* "gentleman's entertainment"... best not show them that. )

On the other hand, sod 'em if they think its gay showing a photo of how you want your hair. You're the customer after all.

Such pressing issues in my life. Is this what they mean by a 'first world problem'?
lol I guess, but I wouldn't worry 'bout it.
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Old 04-03-2013, 19:23
spindiddly
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Good idea, and if you've got a internet capable phone you can just tell them that you'll Google it. (Unless its a guy who specialises in *ahem* "gentleman's entertainment"... best not show them that. )

On the other hand, sod 'em if they think its gay showing a photo of how you want your hair. You're the customer after all.


lol I guess, but I wouldn't worry 'bout it.
Oh no, it's not a porn star. Although looking like Marc Dylan wouldn't be the worst thing.

That's true, the customer is always right. Maybe I could march in there, show them a picture of Ian Somerhalder and say "Do this!".

If only...
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Old 04-03-2013, 19:28
rikstan87
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Hi everyone how are u this evening?
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Old 04-03-2013, 19:35
spindiddly
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^Hey there friend!

I'm good thanks, how are you?
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