A few years ago in work I popped my usual bowl of Super Noodles in the office microwave and went back to my desk while I waited. Two minutes later I was alerted to the fact that smoke was pouring out of every seam in the microwave. It turned out I'd forgotten to add the water.

Not sure whether the microwave was going to explode, I managed to get it outside and open it up. The noodles were absolutely fine except for this lump of black carbon on top, which was the powdered sauce.

The burnt smell lingered there for a month, even once I'd fully cleaned the microwave out. This wasn't a separate kitchen, the microwave was less than a metre away from a bank of desks.

Fond memories...if I'd done that in my new workplace, I'd have caused the whole place to be evacuated.

One of my first attempts at cooking roast chicken ended in disaster when I didn't read the instructions on the Paxo stuffing box and shoved it all in 'dry'...One chicken full of grit..

I have also cooked a chicken with the plastic bag containing the giblets left in the body cavity!

On a similar microwave fail. I put a part baked baguette on a combi setting for 5 minutes.
When I checked it it was still raw. So I set in off again for 10 minutes.

Smelt something, went to the kitchen to find smoke billowing from the microwave. Stopped it and opened the door. I swear that within the lump of charcoal there were red streaks like lava trying to escape

I took the charcoal in a kitchen towel and threw it out of the back door.

Oh dear that's not good.

They were completely black, I'd fallen asleep (very bad of me!) and when I took them out they looked like burnt tire shreds.

The fire alarm never went off though.

Not looking properly at which bottle I was taking out of the cupboard and liberally dashing sesame oil rather than Worcester sauce into my bolognese sauce.... There is no comeback from that...

You never know. Sometimes mistakes like that can become a taste sensation

I promise you, the sensation was not pleasant!